Transcripts

Here you can find transcripts for all released episodes of Y2K. Unreleased episodes are also listed below, transcript will be posted as episode is realeased.

Episodes

PROLOGUE: DECEMBER 31, 1999
EPISODE 1: JANUARY 1-9, 2000
EPISODE 2: JANUARY 10-16, 2000
EPISODE 3: JANUARY 17-23, 2000
EPISODE 4: JANUARY 24-31, 2000
EPISODE 5: FEBRUARY 1-6, 2000
EPISODE 6: FEBRUARY 7-13, 2000
EPISODE 7: FEBRUARY 14-20, 2000
EPISODE 8: FEBRUARY 21-29, 2000
EPISODE 9: MARCH 1-5, 2000
EPISODE 10: MARCH 6-12, 2000
EPISODE 11: MARCH 13-19, 2000
EPISODE 12: MARCH 20-26, 2000
EPISODE 13: MARCH 27-31, 2000
EPISODE 14: APRIL 1-9, 2000
EPISODE 15: APRIL 10-16, 2000
EPISODE 16: APRIL 17-23, 2000
EPISODE 17: APRIL 24-30, 2000
EPISODE 18: MAY 1-7, 2000
EPISODE 19: MAY 8-14, 2000
EPISODE 20: MAY 15-21, 2000
EPISODE 21: MAY 22-31, 2000
EPISODE 22: JUNE 1-4, 2000
EPISODE 23: JUNE 5-11, 2000
EPISODE 24: JUNE 12-18, 2000
EPISODE 25: JUNE 19-25, 2000
EPISODE 26: JUNE 26-30, 2000
EPISODE 27: JULY 1-9, 2000
EPISODE 28: JULY 10-16, 2000
EPISODE 29: JULY 17-23, 2000
EPISODE 30: JULY 24-31, 2000
EPISODE 31: AUGUST 1-6, 2000
EPISODE 32: AUGUST 7-13, 2000
EPISODE 33: AUGUST 14-20, 2000
EPISODE 34: INTERLUDE – AUGUST 27, 2000
EPISODE 35: AUGUST 28-31, 2000
EPISODE 36: SEPTEMBER 1-10, 2000
EPISODE 37: SEPTEMBER 11-17, 2000
EPISODE 38: SEPTEMBER 18-24, 2000
EPISODE 39: SEPTEMBER 25-30, 2000
EPISODE 40: OCTOBER 1-8, 2000
EPISODE 41: OCTOBER 9-15, 2000
EPISODE 42: OCTOBER 16-22, 2000
EPISODE 43: OCTOBER 23-31, 2000
EPISODE 44: NOVEMBER 1-5, 2000
EPISODE 45: NOVEMBER 6-12, 2000
EPISODE 46: NOVEMBER 13-19, 2000
EPISODE 47: NOVEMBER 20-26, 2000
EPISODE 48: NOVEMBER 27-30, 2000
EPISODE 49: DECEMBER 1-10, 2000
EPISODE 50: DECEMBER 11-17, 2000
EPISODE 51: DECEMBER 18-24, 2000
EPISODE 52: DECEMBER 25-31, 2000
EPILOGUE: DECEMBER 31, 2000

Patreon Bonus Episodes

Please note that these bonus episodes are Patreon-exclusive. Therefore, transcripts for bonus episodes are password protected. If you are a Patreon supporter and have forgotten your password, please DM us on Patreon and we will be happy to sort it out. Thank you so much for your support.
BONUS EPISODE 1
BONUS EPISODE 2
BONUS EPISODE 3
BONUS EPISODE 4

Behind-the-Scenes Episodes

Please note that transcripts for these episodes may take longer than others, as they are not scripted. We will try our best to get them to you as close to release date as possible.
BEHIND THE SCENES 1
BEHIND THE SCENES 2
BEHIND THE SCENES 3
BEHIND THE SCENES 4
BEHIND THE SCENES 5
BEHIND THE SCENES 6

PROLOGUE: DECEMBER 31, 1999

(INTRO MUSIC)

Scene 0.1

(New Year’s Eve 1999. A flat in north London. A crowded party. Everyone is very drunk. Door opens. JESS and KAT sneak into a room, JESS wants to show KAT something on the computer. Giggling. Party noises.)

JESS

Come on! Close the door!

(door shuts, party noises abate)

KAT (giggles)

What? I wanna party like it’s 1999! (tries to sing the Prince song but can’t remember the words)

(JESS sits down, computer clicks, modem dial-up tone)

JESS

(distracted) Well it won’t be 1999 for much longer… (mutters) Where is that link?

KAT

I think Johnno wants to *kiss* me. (makes kissy noises) He keeps staring at me. He’s ok I guess…

JESS

I want to show you what I found yesterday. (computer clicks) Look!

KAT

What? It’s just loading… charging… wait what’s it called?

JESS

Remember I’m leaving tomorrow? And that phone calls to New Zealand are expensive? Not to mention the time difference thing? (computer dings) Well, ta-da!

KAT

Ta-what? (sits down) Wait, (reads) Free Online Voicemail – the easy way to stay in touch… Catchy slogan (more serious, slightly more sober) You mean we can leave each other voice mails? For free??

JESS

Yup! I just need to figure out how to get internet once I’m in Auckland, and then we’re all set! Of course the dial-up connection costs a little, but —

KAT

(interrupts) That’s perfect! (suddenly sad) But I will miss you. So much.

JESS

I’ll miss you too my dear. Damn! We said no tears and I’m sticking to it! (beat) Look, I’ve set you up as KatLondon and me as JessAuckland, so we can find each other.

KAT

Damn! (holds back tears) I mean, that’s great. And I *am* happy for you. It’s just — (tries to be cheerful) what if some serious accounting person moves into your room and just kills all the fun?

JESS

And paints my walls cafe au lait? Yuck!

BOTH

And makes stinky tuna in the microwave! (laughter)

JESS

Oh God, he was awful, wasn’t he? What was his name? Lou? Lenny?

KAT

Lee. (starts saying something but stops herself) Actually I- Yes, good thing he moved out. (laughs)

JESS

You do know that you’ll have a say on the next flatmate, right?

KAT

I know. But I might get outvoted… Downvoted? You know what I mean.

JESS

I wouldn’t worry about it. (beat) Anyways, what were you saying about Johnno before? That he was looking at you?

KAT

Yeah. I mean, he’s nothing special really but with the luck I’ve been having… You know. It’s nice to be noticed.

JESS

Yeah. It’s just I’ve heard he’s not so nice to his girlfriends.

KAT

(laughing) I’m not going to be his girlfriend (laughs) so, no worries, OK?

JESS

Right. No worries. Wait, do they even say that in New Zealand or is it just Australia? Guess we’ll find out–

(door opens, party noise, fireworks)

JOHNNO

Kat! C’mon! It’s almost midnight!

KAT

Be there in a sec Johnno!

(door closes, party noises abate)

KAT

Maybe I’ll go out and grab that New Year’s kiss. (beat) Don’t worry, ok? It’ll be great.

JESS

OK. Let’s bring in the new year. (toast) Hey, maybe the world *will* end?

KAT

Nah! It’ll be fine. The year 2000 is going to be amazing!

JESS

Let’s go drink to that!

(They laugh. Door opens, party noise. Fireworks! Explosions!)

(OUTRO MUSIC)

Scene 0.2

KARIN

Hi! Karin Heimdahl, creator of Y2K and also voice of Jess here. Thank you so much for listening to our prologue. Episode 1 drops in January and we will have weekly releases throughout 2020. You will hear these wonderful folks:

(MUSIC)

KIRSTY

Kirsty Woolven as Olivia

JANIS

Janis Westin as Kat

KARIN

Karin Heimdahl as Jess

ADAM

Adam Blanford as Johnno

FELICITY

Felicity Boyd as Rachel

ANJALI

Anjali Kunapaneni as Shirin

SHEKENDRA

Shekendra Morgan as Maia

MADDY

Maddy Searle as Claire

ANNA

Anna Jartin as Tammi

LORCAN

Lorcan NicGiollaBhain as Bri

CHARLOTTE

Charlotte Norup as Kirsten

NERYS

Nerys Howell as Emma

KARIN

You can subscribe for free right now in your favorite podcatcher. Please find us on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number 2, and check out our website y2kpod.com for more information. This episode was part of International Podcast Month 2019. Please go to to internationalpodcastmonth.com to find out more about this wonderful celebration of podcasting. We will be back in January. For now, we leave you with the full song “Welcome to the Year 2000!” by Jake Haws, please check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more of his work.

OLIVIA

Thank you for listening, and welcome back when we return to the year 2000.

MANY VOICES

Welcome to the year 2000!… Welcome… Welcome… to the year 2000… to the year 2000… to the year 2000! Welcome to the year 2000!

(OUTRO MUSIC – Welcome to the Year 2000!)

EPISODE 1: JANUARY 1-9, 2000

(Intro music)

Scene 1.1

OLIVIA

Hey, um, I’m Olivia and this is the Y2K podcast! I’m a little nervous, I’ve never done anything like this before. But I guess I should tell you what this is all about… So a few days ago I managed to get my Mum’s old laptop working. I was hoping to find baby pictures of me, there are hardly any and I was just, well, curious. I rummaged around this really old black-and-white dodgy-looking interface and found — absolutely no baby pictures. No pictures at all actually. But I did find something el se. These old audio files, dozens of them, all labeled with dates from January 2000 onwards. It seems to be a conversation in voicemails between my Mum and a friend of hers, and I’ve only listened to a couple of them but they seem… interesting somehow. Though it’s weird to hear Mum so young – I’ll be 20 this year and she would have been about… 25 when this was recorded. Almost the same age. Cool. But so strange. Right I’m rambling. I thought this would make an interesting podcast. So… Here are the first two messages.

Scene 1.2

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

(library ambience)

JESS

(whispering) Hi Kat! I’m here! And *so* jetlagged. New Zealand sure is a long way away. Sorry about the whispering, I’m at the library computer as I’m still staying in the hostel. Been calling ads for rooms to rent and think I have a few good leads. (muffled footsteps receding, speaks slightly louder) Right, the librarian is out of earshot so I can talk a little louder. Where was I? Yeah. Housing. Auckland is beautiful, it’s summer here and still warm. Flowers everywhere. Really messes with your mind after London winter. One thing I really didn’t grasp before I got here was how incredibly hilly Auckland is – on the map the hostel and the university seem really close together, but in reality there’s an incredibly steep hill between them! Downhill in the morning, thankfully, I couldn’t have coped with the other way around. Anyways, I guess that’ll be an important factor in deciding where to live – whether it’s uphill or downhill from school! Though – come to think of it – I guess I’m not going to be able to afford walking distance so maybe it doesn’t matter. I haven’t quite figured out the buses yet, but they seem  fairly straightforward. The flight was very long but uneventful. I got a little sleep on the first leg but on the flight to Auckland I got seated right behind the smoking seats and it was torture. I thought they’d banned smoking on airplanes. Ugh. Sorry. I know you’re a smoker, but you’re a considerate smoker (laughs). Remember that time –

RACHEL

Shh! This is a library you know.

JESS

Sorry! Almost done! (in lower voice) Let me know how you’re doing – what are you auditioning for? Any luck with the day-job-hunting? And are Shirin and Emma pestering you to let some annoying person have my room? Let me know! Love you! Bye!

(Clicks)

Scene 1.3

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

KAT

Hello Jess! Great to hear your voice! Feels like you are much closer than the other end of the world… London is gray. Or at least Wood Green is gray. (Sighs) I miss you. Emma and Shirin are great but they’re not you. And I miss working with you – even that awful Cinderella disaster — I mean that lovely panto — we did at Christmas. I’ve been auditioning for everything I can find but it’s always the same. You know. They want some really specific British regional accent that I just can’t do. Or perfect RP for that matter. Or else it’s two lines unpaid in something and 300 girls auditioning. (deep sigh) Anyway. I just want to run home to Trollhättan and bury myself in my old bedroom at my mother’s house and eat cheese. (groans) Sorry to be so depressing. (beat) I did find a bartending job, though. You know it’s not my favourite thing but at least it pays the bills, and I really really need that. The only thing is… it’ll mean working for Lee. You know, microwave-tuna-Lee? Stop laughing! He’s OK, really. He gave me a job so I have to think he’s OK, right? It’s five nights a week and the pay is OK. I start tomorrow. Also… I’ve been thinking about Johnno since New Year’s. You know we had that drunken kiss at midnight and it just… hit me, you know? Definite spark. But maybe I’m just so starved in that department that anything will get me going. We will see. OK, what else… Emma and Shirin have called a flatmates’ meeting tomorrow, so I guess I’ll find out then who they have lined up to move in. I know, I know, I’m supposed to have a say but Shirin’s nan does own the flat and I’m just not as good at standing up to them without you. They’re off to the pub in a bit but I said no, I’m just too… something. Not depressed but just down, you know? I’m just going to sit here and… be depressed I guess. (beat) Hang on. You would tell me to go to the pub. In fact, you would drag me there and cheer me up. OK. (laughs) Stop pestering me! I will follow your silent advice. Be right back! (footsteps, door opens, muffled yell) Shirin! Emma! Are you still here?

SHIRIN

 (muffled) We’re in my room!

KAT

(muffled) Don’t leave without me!

SHIRIN

 (muffled) All right but you’d better get a move on, we’re almost ready!

KAT

(Muffled) OK! (footsteps) Right, sorry Jess! Let me know how everything goes – what’s uni like? Did it start already? Are you meeting any nice people? I miss you! Bye! (clicks)

Scene 1.4

OLIVIA

Right, so that’s it for today. I hope you enjoyed it! I rather like hearing their voices from 20 years ago – before I was even born… Anyway. I’ll put these out weekly for as long as it’s fun I suppose. There are a LOT of these files, I haven’t counted them but I think they go until at least December. So, listeners, of which I as yet have none (laughs) did any of you know my mum or her friend around the year 2000? Do you know anything about the other people they mention? I’d like to get more of the story around these voicemails.  Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, or find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Our wonderful music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I guess I’ll put a link to that… somewhere. I’m still figuring out this podcasting thing. Right. (reads) Thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.

(click like something’s turned off but it’s still recording) (lets out a sigh) (mumbles) Too cheesy? Maybe. They might wonder why I don’t just ask my mum but… Well they can wonder. (deep sigh) Hang on, that light’s still on. (click)

(OUTRO MUSIC)

EPISODE 2: JANUARY 10-16, 2000

(INTRO MUSIC)

Scene 2.1

OLIVIA

(reads) My name’s Olivia and this is the Y2K podcast – welcome to the year 2000! (beat) Yeah. Hey. That’s rather cheerful, isn’t it? Just trying to figure out how to open the podcast. Got any ideas? Answers on a postcard… Hang on, why do people say that? I think my parents say it, so I suppose it’s some old reference. They’re full of those. Anyway, e-mail me if you have any tips… I really don’t know what I’m doing. (laughs) So to recap I’ve found a bunch of files on my Mum’s old laptop, it’s 20-year-old voicemails between my Mum and a friend of hers, and I’m turning them into a podcast. And I’m calling it Y2K because that’s short for the year 2000, when the voicemails were recorded. Yeah. But you probably got that. (laughs) So. I’m back at uni and just had a Sedimentology lecture and it was all right I guess but I was just so tired and unfocused that I couldn’t really grasp what they were saying. Like the information just didn’t reach my brain. (sighs) Sorry. So last week (slight hesitation) Jess had just arrived in Auckland and was whispering in a library, while (slight hesitation) Kat was feeling blue back in London. And here is the second round of audio files from January 2000. They seem to be in completely opposite moods here.

Scene 2.2

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

KAT

Jess! Oh I wish I could talk to you directly! Right now! I feel so great! (hums, speaks text) Livin’ La vida Loca… I’m living the ‘loca’ life over here! So, Johnno came to the pub Tuesday night, and he was… He was really cool. It was pretty quiet at the start of the night, and he just ordered a pint and sat there and talked to me when I wasn’t busy. And he’s really smart, you know, I never realized that. We talked about books and politics and theatre – of course we talked about theatre! And music – he’s a huge music nerd and listens to all sorts of stuff I’ve never heard of. We also ended up talking about TV shows, and of course I had to check – and he IS a Buffy fan – maybe even more so than I am! AND he has the first half of season 4 on video and so OF COURSE I invited myself over to watch it. Clever me, huh? So last night I went to his place – he lives in Chalk Farm and he has his own apartment! Haven’t quite figured out how he can afford that… He’s a musician. At least I think so? Yes, he’s in that band, you know? Plays bass? We did NOT talk about our jobs. OK, anyway, we did watch Buffy, like two episodes, you know ‘The Freshman’, and that one with the horrible room-mate – Kathy! – remember how angry we were with her? Anyway, Johnno and I kind of lost interest in TV somewhere around there and… Well it was seriously the best sex I’ve ever had, which is strange, right? But also absolutely amazing. And it wasn’t just sex, we talked. And got hardly any sleep… (serious) I know you’ve heard things about him. But it can’t be right. He’s lovely. And, you know, it’s only been one night – maybe he doesn’t want it to be anything more. Maybe *I* won’t want it to be more. We haven’t promised each other anything. So, no worries, ok?

(00s text noise) Oh! (pause) It’s him. (smiles) He wants to see me tonight! There’s a gig in Brixton – some band I’ve never heard of, but who cares! I have to figure out what to wear. Cross your fingers there’s more amazing sex tonight! (laughs) Love you – bye!

(clicks)

Scene 2.3

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

KAT

Sorry! I mean, let me know what’s up with you – met anyone nice at university? And how is it anyway – it started this week, right? OK, really really wish you were here! Bye again!

(clicks)

Scene 2.4

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

(library ambience)

JESS

Hi Kat. I’m happy you’re so happy. It makes me feel better too. And maybe you’re right about Johnno, maybe it’s all just rumours. But, please, be careful? Have as much sex as you like, but guard your emotions a little. (laughs) I feel like someone in an Austen novel saying that, though of course Lizzie never told Jane to have as much sex as she liked! Maybe she should have, huh? Anyways, remember you’re in that lust-fog now where you feel like you’re in love just because the sex is so good? Don’t trust that feeling! Wait ’til the fog lifts and then figure out what you want to do. All right? And of course congratulations on best sex ever – that’s great. (smiles) No, I’m not jealous. Or bitter. Lonely. Ugh. My dear I’m so happy for you, I’m just having a hard time. Moving to a new country – again – is just exhausting. I did all this when I moved to London five years ago, and it was mostly fun, you know, figuring out where the post office was and what milk to buy and how to get bus passes. I was so happy to be there – and so happy to NOT be in Edmonton – that it didn’t register as a chore. But now, I’m… kind of wondering if I did the right thing coming here. Maybe I didn’t think it through properly. I was just so happy to be accepted, and get the scholarship and everything, and — I was still reeling from the break-up. You know. I do want to do this, and I am sure I will learn a lot, but it’s just so hard. (verge of tears) Damn! I can’t cry in the library! (sniffles, pulls herself together) Yep, still in the library. I move into the new place on Friday. It seems good, the new flatmates are Maia and Tia, and they seem nice enough, just a little stand-offish you know? Like they’re happy to share a flat but don’t really want to hang out. Which is fine, of course, just — And on top of that I’ve now completed two whole days of the *Master of Creative Writing* and talked to exactly no-one apart from the registration person yesterday. (lowers voice) I thought Kiwis were supposed to be friendly, but so far, nope. (normal volume) I know, I know. Give it time. It will get easier. And I can’t give up after two days – I moved all the way to the other end of the world to do this after all. All that ocean between us. That’s actually wonderful here in Auckland – the sea is never far away, and some places are so incredibly beautiful I can hardly believe it. (footsteps approaching, whispers) Crap! Here’s the librarian! 

RACHEL

(kindly) You do need to keep it down you know.

JESS

Sorry! Again! I’ll be done in a sec–

RACHEL

What is that anyway, why are you talking to the computer?

JESS

It’s… I just moved here, so my friend and I are doing internet voicemails. To keep in touch. Phone calls to England are really expensive, and —

RACHEL (interrupts)

How clever! Sorry —

JESS (interrupts)

No, I’m sorry —

(They laugh)

JESS

Go ahead.

RACHEL

I forgot what — Oh! Just how clever, to do voice mails on the computer. I’ve never heard of that.

JESS

Yeah, it’s new I think. Pretty handy. (beat) I’m Jess, by the way.

RACHEL

Rachel. Good to meet you. (smiles) So you just moved here? You a student?

JESS

Yep. Creative Writing. Just started, so can’t really tell you anything about it.

RACHEL

(laughs) All right, I won’t ask. Yet anyway. Where are you staying?

JESS

At the hostel down the street right now, but I’m moving into a flatshare in Newmarket this Friday.

RACHEL

Newmarket’s nice, I hope you’ll enjoy — Oh! There’s someone waiting at the desk, I’d better go. Finish this quickly, right?

JESS

All right, thanks! (pause, footsteps retreating) Did you catch all that Kat? I actually talked to someone! And they were nice! I’ll try to take it as a positive sign. There are nice people here – maybe not kindred spirits like you… and Anne Shirley and Diana Barry (laughs) I’m all literary today, maybe some of the creative writing atmosphere is rubbing off on me after all. (laughs) Not that anyone’s mentioned Montgomery yet – or Austen for that matter. (laughs) The professors seem quite good actually. Though lots of work and super fast paced. We will see. So, my kindred spirit, take care of yourself, and don’t jump into anything too fast, right? Sending you hugs across all the oceans – oceans of hugs!  (laughs) Let me know how everything goes with Johnno, of course, and everything else. Love you!

(clicks)

Scene 2.5

OLIVIA

Right. That’s – (stops herself) I’m glad she seemed happier toward the end there. But – (shudders) — all that sex talk. Do NOT wish to hear my Mum or her friends on that topic. It’s… just odd. I know they’re around 25 here and sex talk in your 20s is to be expected, but still. I don’t have to like it… Anyway. I’m still wondering if any of you knew my mum or her friend around the year 2000? Or maybe you know anything about the other people they hang out with? I’d like to get more of the story around these voice mails.  (reads, still a little uncertain) Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Our wonderful music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. (comments aside from text) I’m doing episode descriptions now, so the link is there. This is Olivia, signing off. (reads, still a little uncertain) Thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.

(OUTRO MUSIC)

EPISODE 3: JANUARY 17-23, 2000

(INTRO MUSIC)

Scene 3.1

OLIVIA

(full of energy) Hey, this is Olivia and the Y2K podcast – once again I welcome you to the year 2000! But not quite yet (laughs) Today I’ve spent all day outdoors and it was very cold but so so beautiful. (laughs) Most of you probably wouldn’t enjoy looking at rocks for a whole day — outdoors — in January — in England, (laughs) but it really is my idea of bliss. Anyway. Happy you are coming with me on this peculiar trip into the past… Last week Kat was all aglow with lust and excitement and Jess was stressed out and met a librarian. And we’re now at the point where I haven’t actually listened to the voice mails in advance – I thought it would be cool if I listened along with you. So I have no idea what they’re talking about this week. Exciting, right? Let’s do it!

Scene 3.2

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

JESS

Hi there Kat. Sooo… (sighs) I got a text from Claire saying she’s moving into my old room on Saturday. It’s fine. I’m fine. I guess she just wanted me to hear it from her, which is nice of her. But – I would really have preferred hearing it from you. I know, I know, you have a lot on your mind right now, walking on cloud 9 and all that (smiles) but, you know, it hurts. Damn! Claire and I spent a lot of time in that room when we were together, and it’s… painful… to think of her in there with her new girlfriend. Rose, she’s Rose. And not all that new anymore. (deep breath) And to think of them hanging out with all of you. Also it’s like Shirin and Emma have picked sides now – I thought they were more my friends than Claire’s and I talked so much to them, especially Shirin, you know,     after the break-up. Not as much as I talked to you, but, you know. And of course I get that you were steam-rolled into this, and it’s not your fault, I just – I just wish you had told me. Just –

(knock on door)

JESS

Yes?

(door opens)

MAIA

Hey, Jess, I’m out of milk, can I take some of yours?

JESS

Sure, go ahead.

MAIA

Hold on, are you all right?

JESS

Yes.

MAIA

No you’re not. What happened?

JESS

(strained laugh) You don’t want to hear my troubles. I’m fine. Or I will be.

MAIA

(sits down) Sure I want to hear your troubles. We don’t really know each other yet but I can’t let you be this miserable all on your own.

JESS

Right. Thanks. It’s – I just found out that my ex is moving into my old flatshare. Into my room. I lived there for almost four years and we spent a lot of time there together. And I – it’s just hard. It hurts! (starts crying)

MAIA

Oh, I’m so   sorry, that’s really rough. (pats Jess on arm) All right, cry if you need to. (pause, JESS cries, MAIA makes comforting noises) Was it recent? The break-up I mean?

JESS

Um… Four months ago?

MAIA

So it’s still quite fresh then. And raw. Did he treat you ok?

JESS

She. Claire. (surprised reaction from MAIA) Yes. And no. She was pretty decent about the actual breaking up with me – as decent as you can be I guess. But… we were supposed to be exclusive and I found out later she’d been cheating on me for at least a year. (near tears) With Rose, who became Claire’s new girlfriend three days after she broke up with me. So that was fun.

MAIA

That’s horrible. And now she’s moving into your old flat?

JESS

Yup. With my old flatmates. It – it feels like they’re choosing sides. Betraying me. (starts crying again) Re- Rep  lacing me.

MAIA

I’m so sorry. (pause, Jess cries) But they’re not replacing you, you know. If they are your friends they will stay your friends. Even if they are friends with… Claire, too.

JESS

(collects herself, deep breath) I know. (beat) You’re right.

MAIA

And you know, they say it takes at least a year to fully recover from a break-up. So maybe give yourself some time?

JESS

Yeah. (pause) Thanks for listening, Maia.

MAIA

(smiles) Anytime.

JESS

(beat) Hey Maia – how come you ended up in Auckland? You’re American, right?

MAIA   

I am. Lived here since I was 15, so almost an honorary Kiwi at this point. (smiles) My parents moved here for work, my Mom has relatives here. (beat) You going to be all right?

JESS

(shaky smile) I will be.

MAIA

Good. (gets up, stops at door) And hey, Jess?

JESS

Yeah?

MAIA

I’m glad you’re our new flatmate. (beat) Also, I guess Tia and I can stop pretending we sleep in separate rooms now.

JESS

Why– Oh! Right. Yes, you can definitely do that. (laughs) Why would you pretend you weren’t a couple?

MAIA

Homophobes.

JESS

(almost at the same time) Of course, sorry.

MAIA

They’re everywhere, and we really needed a new flatmate to make rent, and soon! So we decided to keep it quiet so we could suss you out a little. (catches herself) Sorry! Didn’t mean to flaunt my happy couplehood in the middle of your ex-crisis.

JESS

That’s ok. Gives me hope, I guess. That there *are* happy couples out there (smiles).

MAIA

OK. Good. I’m going to go text Tia to let her know we are officially outed. You sure you’re going to be all right?

JESS

Yes. Thanks. Don’t forget your milk.

MAIA

Thanks, Jess!

(door closes)

JESS

(back to computer) Hi again Kat. I seem to keep recording conversations with people for you. I- I feel better now. And I feel petty. I know you and Shirin and Emma can be friends with Claire AND me. It’s just — she hurt me so much and I guess I want her to be punished. And being denied your friendship would be a real punishment. Anyways. I’m rambling. As you could tell I’m in the flat now, and I guess I just figured out why Maia and Tia were a little stand-offish (laughs) Maia is so kind. This will be a good place to live. School is still a real challenge both socially and — increasingly — academically. They are so many books to read! So many writing assignments! But at least I’m not bored (smiles). So tell me what’s up with you – still on cloud 9? I miss you. And I love you. Sorry for being a petty grump. Sending oceans of hugs!

(clicks)

Scene 3.3

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

KAT

Oh, Jess! I am so sorry! I forgot! I can’t believe I forgot. I’m an idiot. A bad friend. Shit. (deep sigh) I just feel horrible. I really tried to persuade Emma and Shirin to pick someone else, but — majority vote. I know Claire treated you like shit and I won’t be her friend, I promise! I’ll punish her with my non-friendship, so there! (rueful laugh) And you are not a petty grump. You are right. I should have told you. I meant to. But then I started this thing with Johnno and everything else just flew out of my mind I guess. (exasperated sound) I broke the friendship code! Sorry! Sorry sorry sorry! Shit. Hang on. (opens window, lights cigarette, blows out smoke) Smoking calms me down, you know. Johnno doesn’t like it, though, he says — Sorry. Never mind what he says. (inhales) Your new flatmate seems really nice. I’m glad you’ve moved in and that you have started to make yourself at home. I’m a little worried about your workload, though – remember final production at drama school when it got to be too much and you were just frantic and then you kept having panic attacks? Do not let it go that far. Ever again, please. OK? (inhales) Maybe I should recruit that nice flatmate of yours to keep an eye on you, huh? Don’t think I won’t! (Puts out cigarette, closes window) If there are no interesting people at uni maybe you should go back and talk to that librarian, she seemed nice. I miss you! I love you! And oceans of hugs – that’s perfect!

(clicks)

Scene 3.4

OLIVIA

(preoccupied) All right. That was pretty emotional. You know, I thought there would be only my Mum and her friend on these files, but other people seem to creep in as well. I haven’t decided yet if I like that or not. Will let you know. (beat) Anyway, I’ve gotten some e-mails. So I know at least four people are listening! (laughs) They were all about the same thing — which of the two friends is my Mum. A very reasonable question, really. But… I won’t tell you. Sorry about that. I’m not using any last names anywhere, and I want to respect my family’s privacy. I guess there could come a time when something in the recordings reveal some details, but I will deal with that when it comes. So you can speculate all you like but I will say nothing. I’ll just call them (very slight hesitation) Kat and (very slight hesitation) Jess. However I would still be interested to hear from you if you knew them around the year 2000? Or maybe if you know anything about the people around them? (reads, a little more confident) Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. You can also check out our website at y2kpod.com – we have a website! Very exciting! Our beautiful music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. The link is in the episode description. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.

(OUTRO MUSIC)

EPISODE 4: JANUARY 24-31, 2000

Scene 4.1

(INTRO MUSIC)

OLIVIA

Hey everyone, I’m Olivia and you are listening to the Y2K podcast – welcome to the year 2000! Wait, perhaps I should move that phrase to the end of this intro-thingy-ma-goob? Yes, I will try that. (clears throat) So, what’s up at my end… I’m taking Genetics this term, which is fascinating. I look at my parents, my grandparents, and at myself, and think about what is genes, and what is learned behavior. It’s especially interesting for me as I am only biologically linked with some of my family, yet I feel I have many similarities with all of them. In class we’re mostly studying genetic variation and not really heredity though. Anyway, are you ready for this week’s voice mails from the past? Last week Jess was freaking out over her ex moving into her old room, and Kat apologized for not telling her. All right. Welcome… to the year 2000!

Scene 4.2

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

JESS

Hi Kat. Thanks. And you don’t need to withhold your friendship from Claire, even though I really appreciate the offer. You’re going to be flatmates — from tomorrow I think — so you need to get on. But, you know, you don’t have to become best friends or anything, right? (laughs) Anyways. I miss you. Maia and Tia are great, and Tia lured me off to pilates the other day which was great — Right, two ‘greats’ in a row… They ARE great. I’m just not feeling so… great, I guess. (laughs) I drag myself to class and back and do the mountains of assignments – so far it’s not really that exciting but I think it will *get* really interesting down the line – but I don’t have energy for much else. (pause) I thought I was mostly over Claire but this has brought back all the old feelings again and I – I – it hurts so much. I don’t want her back but — how can it still hurt so much? How could I have trusted her? For that matter, how can I trust anyone? I can’t even trust my own judgement. (emotional sigh) It’s becoming very clear to me that I wasn’t ready for this. This moving to another country and starting a really challenging degree. That I was running away. (beat) No, that’s not the only truth. I want to do this and I want to immerse myself in creative writing, I want to learn all I can. I like acting a lot but it never really felt like *me* you know? But writing… I can imagine a whole world and make it come alive. I love that. Right. Sorry for being an emotional wreck. I will stick it out. I will make it work somehow. And yes, I will take care of myself. As should you, my dear. And you can tell me all about Johnno, you know. I wanna know. Right. I somehow feel better just talking to you. (smiles) Oceans and oceans of hugs!

(clicks)

Scene 4.3

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

KAT

(worried) Oh Jess. I’m so sorry you are hurting so much. You know, maybe it would be a good idea to find a therapist, just to sort through these feelings? I know you’ve found it helpful before. And yes, I know, expensive, and student budget and so on, but you cannot have less money than you did here, Auckland *has* to be less expensive than London, right? I mean, isn’t everywhere? Well except for places like New York I guess. So no excuses. Maybe your housemates could help you with where to start looking? OK? At least think about it. (pause) Aaaand… you asked about Johnno (laughs) Well, since you asked… It’s going very well. He challenges me, and I need that. He doesn’t let me get away with anything and I like it. You know I risk overpowering guys? Yeah, not him. And he comes up with all these fun things we can do – like yesterday he showed up at work – I was on the afternoon shift so finished at six – with tickets to The Globe that night! It was some obscure Shakespeare play I’d never even heard of, but it was amazing to experience The Globe properly – I hadn’t been yet as it’s a little expensive. Yeah… that’s one thing that is a little uncomfortable. He keeps treating me. He makes quite a lot of money at his day job – turns out he’s an IT-something-or-other – who knew? Anyway I as you know never have any money. I try to treat him sometimes when we’re at less expensive places, but he never seems to realize how even those minor costs create huge holes in my budget. OK, I know what you’re going to say – talk to him about it. And I kind of have, but maybe I need to try again. Hang on — I haven’t told you about our talk last week, have I? I – bravely, points for me! – brought up the where-are-we-heading-conversation. And it went pretty well. We decided we are ‘dating’ in the American sense, but not exclusively. Not that I can imagine being with someone else at this point – nor do I understand how we would have time to ‘date’ anyone as we spend so much time together. So, there we are. Not quite a relationship, but not just sex either. He’s been hurt in relationships before and wants to take it slow, which is fine by me. We —

(Bumps and thuds outside, voices, heavy things being carried)

CLAIRE

(muffled) Shirin! Kat! Emma! Anyone there?

(KAT opens door)

KAT

Hello Claire. Wow – that’s a lot of stuff.

CLAIRE

Yeah, could you give me a hand? Rose went downstairs to get the rest.

KAT

Sure, I just have something to finish up. I’ll be right there.

CLAIRE

Ta!

(Bumps and thuds resume, KAT closes door.)

KAT

Sorry Jess. I thought she wasn’t moving in until tonight. It’ll be OK, you know? It’s not like I’m here much anyway, I’m mostly at Johnno’s. So, take care of yourself. Breathe. Get a therapist. And no worries. All will be fine. OK? Love you!

CLAIRE

(muffled) Kat! Come help me with this desk!!

KAT

(to CLAIRE) Coming! (to JESS) Oceans and oceans of hugs!

(clicks)

Scene 4.4

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

JESS

Hi again Kat. Wow. That was… weird. Actually hearing Claire move in. Yikes! But also good in a way. It’s done, I heard it, it’s happened. Right. Breathe. (breathes) You’re right. I’m going to talk to Maia and see if they know how to get hold of a therapist. And if not, maybe the student service centre could help. I — I was pretty close to a panic attack yesterday, but managed to breathe through it like that therapist taught me final year. (breathes) Anyways. I’m glad that Johnno makes you happy. Though this whole ‘dating non-exclusively’ thing seems a little… not you. You’ve always been a serial monogamist, or had casual flings where it’s been all about the sex. This seems… different. But I guess it could be a good thing you’re not committing, at least not yet, so you can keep being careful with your emotions. You are being careful, right? Please be careful? I don’t want you getting hurt. But I guess this could be a good way to have a bit of a trial period before deciding if you want to commit to him. Just make sure he is kind, right? If I learned one thing from the horrible break-up with Claire it’s that you need to be with someone who is kind and respects you. She tried to be kind but wasn’t very good at it. Also she really didn’t respect me. She didn’t-

(JESS’ mobile rings, 00s signal)

JESS

(looks at phone, agitated) I’d better get this. I think I was rambling anyway. (nervous laugh) Love you! Bye! (answers phone – beep) Hi-

(clicks)

Scene 4.5

OLIVIA

Oh, I wonder who was calling Jess? Hopefully we’ll find out next week. Anyway, I’m off to study my Genetics notes, we have a tutorial tomorrow. It’s fascinating but complicated, I need to make sure I have a firm grasp of the basics. So, dear listeners, I would still like to hear from you if you knew my mum and her friend around the year 2000? Or maybe if you know anything about their friends? (reads, more confident) Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. You can also check out our website at y2kpod.com. Our tremendous music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. The link is in the episode description. My name’s Olivia, thank you so much for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.

(OUTRO MUSIC)

EPISODE 5: FEBRUARY 1-6, 2000

(INTRO MUSIC)

Scene 5.1

OLIVIA

Hello listeners, this is Olivia and the Y2K podcast. I’m… hungover. Yeah. Wasn’t going to tell you that but I’m not very good at pretending. (smiles) Anyway I’m sure most of you can relate. I’m not that much of a party person but yesterday after class my friend Tammi dragged me to the pub and we were only going to have one pint, but we got to talking and had another and another and all of a sudden it was like 6 am and we’d been dancing and were very very drunk. It’s always like that when I hang out with her, she’s… magic I guess? (laughs, stops suddenly) Ow! My head. Yeah, I know. Only myself to blame. And Tammi, actually. I blame her! (very quiet laugh) Ouch. Wouldn’t be recording today but I couldn’t fit it in earlier in the week and this is supposed to go out tomorrow so I don’t really have a choice. I’m not about to mess with the podcast release dates. So you’re stuck with this hungover wreck today I’m afraid. (smiles) And that told you I was out all night on a Wednesday, yep, living the glamourous student life out   here in Brum… (yawns) All right, let’s get this started so I can grab some painkillers and some more water. Last week Kat wanted to talk to Johnno about money, Claire moved in, and Jess got a mystery phone call. Let’s hope they don’t yell a lot today! (winces, subdued) Welcome to the year 2000.

Scene 5.2

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

KAT

Jess! Hello my dear. I can’t help wondering who called you – you don’t usually stop recording for anything… Interfering librarians and nosy flatmates included (laughs). Fill me in on what’s going on, OK? Oh, and did you ever meet that librarian again? She seemed nice. Also I hope you’re feeling better. Claire is all moved in, and it’s pretty strange having her living here. Though she spends some time at Rose’s as well so at least she’s not here all the time. And I’m at Johnno’s quite a lot, so that helps. Emma and Shirin are acting like Claire’s a nice normal person but I just can’t. She was awful to you. Though I realize I do have to get on with her so I’m trying to find that ice-cold-but-cordial mode. Not easy! Sorry. Maybe you don’t want to hear this. Let me know, OK? And I’ll shut up about it. Hang on. (opens window, light early afternoon traffic noise, lights cigarette, inhales smoke, lets it out) Ah… Let’s see, Johnno and I are going to see some band called (tries a few different pronounciations) Queensrike- Queensrush- Queensryche? Anyway, see them at Brixton Academy on Sunday. You know I’m always up for trying new things, but progressive metal? Yeah, I’m a little skeptical. Actually a lot skeptical. (laughs, inhales) Johnno says the lead singer has a really powerful and emotional voice, whatever that means (laughs). But he thinks I will like it, so I’ll give it a go. (hums Genie in a Bottle) Christina Aguilera, now *there’s* a powerful and emotional voice! But it should be fun.   (inhales) I’m fairly happy working at the pub, Lee is a pretty chill  manager, and the people are friendly but not out to be my new best friends. You know. Nice. Also it’s only moderately popular so it’s never too busy, even on Fridays and Saturdays. (puts out cigarette, closes window) And I’m auditioning, of course, but it feels pretty hopeless. Rejections piling up and, well, it hurts. Especially the theatre ones where I know it’s a long shot but I still have to invest in the play and the character in order to audition. And for a moment I feel as though the part is mine and I think about how wonderful it will be and then – boom – I fall back into reality again. Maybe I should have become an engineer like my mother (laughs) – no! I would hate that! (laughs) – or you know something more sensible where it was possible to get an actual *job*. (beat)What am I saying? I love acting. I want to act. I will act.  I just need to convince someone to hire me. Easy-peasy. (beat) Yeah.  I was rejected for a Moliére maid today, can you tell? (smiles) I’ll be back to my optimistic self in a day or two. OK, I’m off to work now, take care my dear, and let me know what’s up with you. Love you!

(clicks)

Scene 5.3

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

JESS

Hi Kat, you always know when something’s off, don’t you? I should have told you who called but I froze. It was Mom. Yeah, I know. My estranged mother. You know I cut my parents off after I came out and they — well, didn’t? Hardest damned thing I’ve ever done. And then London and drama school and you and Claire and I felt like the world was the right way around again. (beat) What I never told you – I didn’t know how – is that Mom reached out to me last year right before final production. She was… civil? And she’s been calling me now and then ever  since, chatting, steering clear of all the no-go-zones. And I’ve picked up her calls. I thought maybe we could — I don’t know. Be something to each other — have some sort 

of relationship again? I wanted to talk to you about it but it felt so unreal and somehow so delicate, like the slightest draft would disintegrate it. I can’t explain it any better than that. So I’ve talked to her about her gardening and her church friends and my studies, you know, safe things. And it’s been nerve-wracking and difficult but also good. Good to be in some sort of touch again. But the other day I happened to mention that things were a little tough at school and she freaked out and started some weird rant about how I should have stayed in college and in Edmonton. (angry tears) I dropped out five years ago! (beat) I let her rant on for a while but then I made up some excuse and finished the call. Kat, I don’t know what to do. Everything is hard work right now, and I can’t handle this on top of everything else. I think I’ll have to not pick up her calls. At least for a while. (sighs) Oh, but   you’d be proud of me, I found a therapist through the university health services – they were incredible. I have an appointment next week, I hope they’re good. Let’s see, what else is going on… Sunday is Waitangi Day here, like the New Zealand national day, but apparently it’s also controversial as many are protesting celebrating a day commemorating a treaty where the Māori people lost their land. Maia and Tia have some Māori friends, and they’ve invited me to join as they visit them for a Hāngī. I’m sure it will be delicious! And the Monday after that is a bank holiday, so I am abandoning my writing assignments and reading for the day and we are heading to the beach! I’ve spent surprisingly little time at the beach since coming here and it’s time to remedy that before fall comes and it’s too cold. Anyways. Have to go write ‘an emotion through the description of a tree’. Yeah, that makes no sense. I’d better go find a really good tree! And.. hug it? (laughs) Good thing I like trees! Love you!

(clicks)

Scene 5.4

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

KAT

Jess! (laughs) I love that! An emotion through a tree!! You have to e-mail me what you come up with – I must read this! Are all your assignments like that? Sounds about as cuckoo as drama school! Amazing! (hums “Don’t Sit Under the Apple Tree”) I’m having a great day, Johnno and I slept in and had brunch at this wonderful café and then went to the London Aquarium – you know I love aquariums but I’d never been to this one as it’s silly expensive. Yeah. Guess who paid… (sigh) Anyway it was magical. Such beautiful blue light through the water and colorful fish and scary sharks swimming by and just so… so mesmerizing – Ha! Vocab word! Remember at drama school I was trying to expand my English vocabulary and you found those “weekly vocab” lists? And then you quizzed me every Friday afternoon at the pub? Thank you! Apparently I learnt something! Mesmerizing! Though I still don’t think I’ve ever used ‘bucolic’ or ‘binomial’ in a sentence. (laughs) But I know what they mean! And I know those were both in week ‘B’! Anyway. (more serious) Thank you for telling me about your mother. And I’m so sorry you are hurting. You really didn’t need that on top of everything else. I’m crossing my fingers your new therapist is all right. More than all right – amazing! OK? You don’t need to pick up your mom’s calls if they just stress you out. On the other hand, I get that just her calling will stress you out regardless. Try to relax this week-end, and have fun with Maia on Waitangi Day. I’ll just have to admit that I’d never heard about it before. But I hope it is wonderful, and that you have a lovely day at the beach on Monday! OK, looking out at the grey rain that is London and wish I could teleport over and join you! I have to rush to work – in the freezing sideways rain! Love you! Oceans!

(clicks)

Scene 5.5

OLIVIA

All right, I’m back. Headache is receding slightly but now I’m nauseous. (groans) Better wrap this up. So, Jess’s mum is being horrible and Kat’s been looking at fish. (sigh) I am never drinking again. Ever. Um, so e-mail me if you know anything. About anything. (reads, a little too quickly) You can reach me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Check out our website at y2kpod.com. Our exhilarating music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. The link is in the episode description. My name’s Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000. (relieved) All right, I’m gonna go lie down somewhere…

(OUTRO MUSIC)

EPISODE 6: FEBRUARY 7-13, 2000

Scene 6.1

(INTRO MUSIC)

OLIVIA

Hello listeners, this is Olivia with the Y2K podcast. Feeling much better this week, thank you for asking. Will go easy on the beer for a while though (laughs). So, next term I am going on an exchange somewhere, to study Geology and Palaeontology at a university overseas, and do lots of exciting field work. Listening to these files makes me really want to go to New Zealand. Maybe it’s that they’ve been talking about summer and beaches and February is unusually dreary here this year, but maybe it’s that it sounds interesting. Beautiful. Challenging. Not that Jess has been very happy there so far. (beat) Anyway. We’re supposed to hand in our preferences next week, and I might just put University of Auckland at the top of my list… We’ll see what happens. Wherever I end up, I hope to continue with this podcast for as long as it’s fun, and there seem to be files available for at least the whole year of2000! What I’m trying to say is I’ll bring my mic and laptop and the podcast will continue. All right? So last week Jess’s mum had been calling from Canada and ranting at her, and Kat was feeling pessimistic about her future as an actor but had a great time at the aquarium. Let’s dive into this week, shall we? Welcome to the year 2000!

Scene 6.2

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

JESS

 Kat! I wish you *could* have teleported over! I had the most incredible long week-end and somehow getting over Claire and Mom being (beat) her awful self again – feels a little further away. Still hurts like hell but not quite *bleeding* anymore, you know? So we went to see Maia’s and Tia’s friends and had the most wonderful time. We had a really fun, relaxed night. And today we’ve been at the beach in Devonport along with every other city dweller … But it was fine, there was a lot of people but it somehow didn’t feel very crowded, and we splashed and swam and lay around in the shade reading – I realized I hadn’t read an actual novel – well apart from those I read for school – since the flight over here – no wonder I’m not feeling myself! So I picked up a Stephen King – “The Girl Who Loved Tom Gordon” – and it was good. Not his best, but *definitely* not his worst. And King is perfect for a beach read, completely immersive and trilling yet the scary bits are tempered by calming waves and gentle breeze and golden sand. It was so beautiful, Kat. (beat) I’ve decided to not pick up if Mom calls again. At least not for a while. I need to deal with everything else before I – maybe? – deal with her. But today at least I feel ready –

(sound of door being unlocked, opened, in distance)

MAIA (muffled)

Jess? You there?

JESS

In my room!

(knock on Jess’s door)

JESS

Come on in, I’m just-

(door opens)

MAIA

Hey Jess, we’re making ratatouille, you want to join us?

JESS

Hi…

MAIA

Oh, this is my friend –

JESS

(smiles) Rachel, right?

RACHEL

(smiles) And you’re Jess.

MAIA

You know each other?

(Jess and Rachel speak at the same time)

JESS

Not really, we met-

RACHEL

Sort of-

(Rachel and Jess laugh)

RACHEL

Jess came to the library a while back. I had to tell her off for being too loud. (smiles)

MAIA

(laughs) Well I can start on dinner if you two want to… (smiles) I don’t know – talk about books? Make a collage? (laughs, goes to kitchen).

RACHEL

(distracted by Jess) Sure, thanks. (gestures to bed) Can I-

JESS

Sure!

RACHEL

(sits down on bed, rustling, smile) So it was *this* Newmarket flat you were talking about. How did you find it?

JESS

Oh, newspaper listing. I’ve been really lucky, Maia and Tia are great. Have you known them – or Maia – long?

RACHEL

A few years, since Maia started working part-time at the library.

JESS

Right! I’d forgotten they do that. I always just see them knitting enormous yarn with their arms or hand-dyeing fabric or stuff like that, and then –

RACHEL

(interrupts) Then all of a sudden they’ve turned it into incredible art!

JESS

Exactly! Don’t know how they manage to do that every time, but their stuff is so cool.

RACHEL

I don’t know if you noticed the huge blue-green-sparkly thing by the entrance of the library?

JESS

Of course! That one’s incredible. Plus it has Maia all over it. Wow.

RACHEL

(nodding at book) So, what are you reading?

JESS

(hands Rachel book) Stephen King. Just finished it today.

RACHEL

(pages rustle) Any good?

JESS

Pretty good. Not his best, but you know –

RACHEL

Not his worst either?

JESS

(laughs) How did you know I was going to say that?

RACHEL

I’ve read a *lot* of Stephen King. Some of them are- (hesitates)

JESS

Barely readable?

RACHEL

(laughs) Exactly. Haven’t read this one though. Can I borrow it?

JESS

Yeah. I-

MAIA (muffled)

Can you two stop flirting and come give me a hand?

JESS

We weren’t-

RACHEL

(interrupts) Weren’t we? (smiles) Coming?

JESS

Yeah. (remembers) Oh! I just have to finish up my message to Kat. To my friend Kat. In London. Where it’s raining. Probably. (stops herself) I’m babbling.

RACHEL

You are. Kind of dadaist (beat) but I like it. (smiles) Thanks for the book. I’ll go help Maia. See you in the kitchen. (leaves with book)

JESS

Yeah. See you… (sits down, to Kat) Hey Kat. That was Rachel. Again. She’s- She’s- Wow. Yeah. She just showed up in my room. Well you heard that. And she’s wonderful. Right. I have to go. Let me know what’s up with you – love you! Oceans of hugs!

(clicks)

Scene 6.3

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

KAT

Hey Jess, so glad you had a good week-end! I almost felt like I was there with you! And I can’t believe Rachel is friends with Maia. So… flirting, huh? (laughs) I get that you have other things going on, but there was some definite chemistry there. Anyway. I keep asking you about uni and you keep not saying much, apart from it’s a lot. So how is it really? Assignments, professors, fellow students? Is it all day every day lectures or seminars or – I don’t know – feedback sessions or group assignments… Or is it more you completing a ton of writing assignments on your own? See? I have no clue. Also you have to send me a picture of your room once you feel like you’ve made it yours. What does your neighborhood look like? What do you see when you look out of your window? You know exactly what *I’m* looking at after all… Same old Wood Green. (sighs) Johnno’s on a business trip this week. In Florida, lucky bastard. I miss him. So much. In such a short time he’s become really important to me. To the point where I don’t like sleeping alone, and I put off going to bed so I don’t have to. Last night I got home from work at midnight and had this idea for new earrings, so I started bending wire and fiddling with beads and then all of a sudden it was 4 in the morning… Yeah, not good for my sleep! But it was so much fun, and I haven’t had time to make anything for a while… Anyway, he needs to come home so I get more sleep! Not very romantic perhaps, but I’ve always been more pragmatic… Johnno’s pretty damned romantic, though. He keeps hinting at something he’s planning for Valentine’s day next week, but he won’t tell me what. (smiles) So that should be fun. What else? Claire hasn’t re-painted your room yet, I think she likes the grey. You know she- Never mind. Also I got my hair cut by some student at Toni & Guy, so it only cost 5 pounds. But I had very little say in what they did, so now I have trendy-ish asymmetrical hair. It’s not what I would have chosen, but it’s kind of cool. She wanted to dye the roots dark too, which I thought was a funny idea. Anyway her instructor said no, and she just did highlights. Very relieved at that, you know how I hate when my hair grows out blonde under a darker color and it just looks like I’m bald? Yeah, saved by the bell I guess! OK, I should finish this up. Let me know what your therapy appointment was like. And take care of yourself. OK? Love you! Bye!

(clicks)

Scene 6.4

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

JESS

Hi Kat, so… I saw my therapist today. It was a guy, which was a little weird. I’ve only had female therapists before. But I decided to give him a chance and told him about Claire, and Mom, and coming here, and feeling out of place. All the stuff. And he was pretty good. I mean, there was a *lot* for him to take in all at once, and he made lots of notes, but he listened, and the responses he gave me     made sense, and I feel like I can talk to him, so, yeah. Pretty good overall. I’m seeing him again in three weeks. Things are better, but they’re not great. I guess I haven’t been talking about school because I don’t know what to say. It’s pretty good, but… I expected it to be incredible. So, yeah. (beat) Anyways. We usually have lectures and/or seminars every weekday morning. Most of them are interesting, some are very very boring. We have this one professor who cannot structure the discussions, which means the – few! – wackos in my discussion group completely take over, and bring up their own specific hobbyhorses which have little or nothing to do with what we’re actually supposed to be talking about. Drives me up the wall. He’s a great lecturer, and seems very nice, but he’s so useless at structure. He gave us the ‘emotion through a tree’-assignment, which was weird but interesting – I will e-mail it to you, have to remember – and when half of us had handed it in he told the other half they needn’t bother as one or two had objected to the assignment. So why give it out in the first place?? Yeah. Then in the afternoons we have feedback sessions in groups, and also individually once a week, and time to read and write. It’s actually ´-

(JESS’ mobile rings, 00s signal)

JESS

Better not be Mom- (looks at phone, surprised) Oh! It’s Bri, I have to get this – I’ll get back to you! So sorry to do this again! (answers phone – beep) Hi Bri!

(clicks)

Scene 6.5

OLIVIA

Aaaall right… Who is Bri? Maybe we’ll find out next week! I got an e-mail from someone named Cassandra in Wellington, she says she lived in Auckland twenty years ago and might have known Jess, but she’s not sure – she says there were a lot of Jess’ and Jessicas around the university at that time. She’s going to follow the podcast to see if she picks up any other clues. Thank you, Cassandra! So, please check out our webpage y2kpod.com, you can go there for more info, and, of course, to listen to episodes. We are also on Apple Podcasts (what used to be iTunes), Google Podcasts, Spotify and most other podcatchers. Isn’t that a great word – podcatcher! Like you stick it up in the air and it catches random podcasts for you! I learned that today listening to the Oz 9 podcast. It is so funny! It’s about a doomed spaceship – the Oz 9 – with a completely useless but hilarious crew. You should listen, they could make anyone laugh! Also their AI’s named Olivia, which is just… a really great name (laughs). So… If anyone – like Cassandra – thinks you might have known Kat or Jess or their friends around the year 2000 I would be very interested to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Our amazing music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. The link is in the episode description. I’m Olivia, (reads) thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.

(OUTRO MUSIC)

EPISODE 7: FEBRUARY 14-20, 2000

CONTENT WARNING

OLIVIA

Hey everyone, Olivia here. After listening to today’s voice mails I feel I need to put some kind of warning here. This episode contains descriptions of a suicide attempt, as well as descriptions of homophobia and transphobia. Please take care of yourself, and if you need to, don’t be afraid to reach out and ask for help.

(INTRO MUSIC)

Scene 7.1

OLIVIA

Hello, my name is Olivia and this is the Y2K podcast. (beat) How are you today, listeners? I’m fine, a bit of a cold, pouring rain so not much fun outdoors… So yeah. February in Birmingham! A bit grey and dull really. I hope you are somewhere nicer – I saw the other day that I have a listener in Singapore, which is just… WILD. And great – thank you so much for listening! Either way, I am sure it’s warmer there – but maybe it’s monsoon season? Let me check (grabs her phone to google) Blimey, it rains more than here! But, yes, warm. And humid! All right, suddenly not so jealous of your weather, listener in Singapore! But I bet Singapore is brilliant in any weather! All right, let’s get to the story, shall we? Last week Jess had a great week-end and talked to someone named Bri, and Kat missed Johnno and got a haircut. Today I hope we find out who Bri is! Welcome… to the year 2000!

Scene 7.2

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

KAT

Hello Jess – Happy Valentine’s Day! In Swedish it’s “All Hearts Day” which I love – gets me thinking about *all* the people I love and not just one romantic partner. And so of course I want to check in with you! So… haven’t heard from you for (jokingly) *four whole days*. What’s up? Anything going on with Bri and your family? Your mother bugging Bri this time? You OK? It’s not like you were dancing around like Julie Andrews in the hills of Austria last I heard from you… (hums “The Hills Are Alive”) So let me know, OK? Let’s see… I just auditioned for a toothpaste commercial, have no clue why – yes I do, it’s paid work. And at least toothpaste is something I actually use – remember that weird viagra thing we auditioned for last year? So very happy neither of us got that one! What were we thinking? And it was everywhere – still is I think – and the girl who got it didn’t want to go out for months. (laughs) Or so her flatmate told me, anyway. Poor thing. (beat) Still haven’t talked to Johnno about the money-thing. Everything else is good and I don’t want to rock the- wait, what is that saying? Rock the… cradle? No, bridge? Boat? No, doesn’t sound right. You know what I mean. But, yeah, I’m falling for him. How could I not? He’s smart and cute and fun and takes care of me and… I like him. And he doesn’t let me get away with stuff, you know? I need that. Remember my wimp of an ex? Don’t want to deal with that again. (beat) Work is OK. I’ve gotten some afternoon shifts lately which is much quieter. It’s nice in a way, but also a little dull. I –

(Door opens)

JOHNNO

Kat! (sees her, happy) You’re here! (gives KAT a big kiss) Miss me?

KAT

(befuddled but pleased) Johnno! Yeah, but… I thought we were meeting at seven?

JOHNNO

I just missed you . (kisses the top of her head) And… Surprise! I have tickets to see The Hives at six! Happy Valentine’s Day!

KAT

(still taken aback, but happy) Wow. Thank you! That’s great. (smiles) Though I’ve never heard of them.

JOHNNO

(laughs) They’re Swedish, I thought you’d know all about them!

KAT

Really? (laughs) Nope! (beat) Um, I was going to- never mind. (beat) Oh, but I only got you this silly little thing, I should have –

JOHNNO

(interrupts) That’s OK sweetheart, you can buy dinner! (kisses KAT)

KAT

OK. Right. (beat) When do we have to leave?

JOHNNO

(looks at watch) Half an hour? It’s at the Astoria. (beat) Hold on, what did you do to your hair?

KAT

Oh yeah, I had a haircut. Toni & Guy. What do you think? (twirls)

JOHNNO
(thinks) Hm. I liked you with longer hair. And… (takes a closer look) It’s lopsided?

KAT

(taken aback) It’s supposed to be asymmetrical.

JOHNNO

All right. (laughs) Never mind. It’ll grow out. (hugs KAT again, nuzzles her neck) So what should we do now?

KAT

(a little happier, slowly) Well… (remembers) Oh! I was in the middle of leaving a voice mail for Jess, let me just finish up.

JOHNNO

All right then. (kisses KAT, to computer) Hi Jess! Hope everything’s good in New Zealand! (to KAT) I’ll just grab a magazine and wait for you. (rustle of magazine, quick peck for KAT, settles down on KAT’s bed)

KAT

OK. (to computer, clearly uncomfortable that Johnno stayed in the room) Um, hi again Jess. So, that was Johnno. But you heard that. Yeah. Where was I? Oh. Update. I didn’t get the Ayckborn play, did I even tell you I auditioned for it? (JOHNNO’s magazine pages rustling) They called me back, but I found out yesterday they’d cast someone else. It wasn’t a huge part, but it was some pay and I like Ayckborn. Also a small tour which would have been fun.

JOHNNO

(from behind his magazine, slightly muffled, distracted) But I would have missed you, sweetheart.

KAT

(pleased at the sentiment but annoyed at the interruption) Yeah. But it was only a week, I think we could have managed a week. (nervous laugh, back to JESS) I think that’s it. Take care of yourself, and let me know what’s up with Bri and… everyone. Also, remember to e-mail me that thing we talked about.

JOHNNO

(from behind his magazine, slightly muffled, distracted) Sounds like you’re talking in code, sweetie, just pretend I’m not here.

KAT

(annoyed but tries not to show it) OK. (beat) Love you, Jess, hope to hear from you soon. B-

JOHNNO

(sits up, lays down magazine) You tell your friends you love them?

KAT

Yeah. Well mainly Jess, we’ve been friends a long time. (beat) And I do love my friends, why shouldn’t I tell them?

JOHNNO

It sounds so… American.

KAT

Jess is Canadian. (beat) I guess technically that’s on the American continent. North American continent. The American continents? Anyway. You say that like it’s bad. 

JOHNNO

No, no I guess not. (pause) You’ve never said it to me.

KAT

And you’ve never said it to me.

JOHNNO

I… I’ve told girls I loved them before. And they’ve hurt me. So I suppose I’m careful with it now.

KAT

(slowly) O–K

JOHNNO

And we’re not there.

KAT

I guess we’re not, no.

JOHNNO

(hugs and kisses KAT) You’re my sweetheart! Isn’t that enough?

KAT

Of course.

JOHNNO

(looks at watch) We have to run – are you ready?

KAT

OK, just let me get my things. (noise of grabbing purse, jacket)

JOHNNO

Let’s be off!

(door opens and closes, footsteps. Pause. Running feet, door thrown open)

JOHNNO

(muffled) Get a move on!

KAT

Sorry! Bye Jess!

(clicks)

Scene 7.3

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

JESS

Hi Kat, sorry about the radio silence… And for hanging up on you, twice. Ugh. Sorry again. Bri was really upset. And so far away. I was inches from calling the emergency services in Edmonton from the landline and get them to send an ambulance over. But in the end I didn’t, just kept her talking. Down from the ledge as it were. Literally. Bri had the sleeping pills on hand. Kat, it was so scary!! (swallows, pause) My wonderful parents have done it again. To Bri this time. I am so fucking angry! Furious doesn’t even begin to cover it. Bri and I have been e-mailing since I left – neither of us can really afford the phone calls – but you know it’s been occasional, we’re both busy, and she’s graduating college this year – or was supposed to — OK I’m stalling. (beat) Bri finally came out to our parents as transgender. Which they should have figured out years ago, but they are not exactly perceptive… And they took it, well, not at all really. They closed off and asked Bri to leave and not come back. Perfect parents, right? God I hate them. (yells) I HATE MY PARENTS. (pause) So Bri is coming here. I booked hi- fuck! her a plane ticket on my credit card – have to deal with that one later – and am going to meet her at the airport in a few hours. Bri’s roommate helped pack and made sure she got on the plane. And Maia and Tia have agreed to let her stay here for a while – they even cleared out their study so Bri can stay there. They really are the best flatmates ever. Thank God for them. Or – I don’t believe in God. At least not my parents’ awful patriarch with a big beard and even bigger prejudices. Ugh! Wish you were here, Kat. I need someone to hold my hand through all of this. Bri is in really bad shape and I’m not sure we know each other that well anymore. Haven’t seen her for over five years and we’ve only talked on the phone like once a year. But I love Bri. And I will protect her and support her with everything I’ve got. (long pause) So that’s my news… Oh, and school is tough still but starting to get really interesting. Also I’ve finally started making some acquaintances – we started some group assignments and it seems everyone else in my group were as freaked out by the workload as I was and didn’t really talk to anyone else either. Anyways. (beat) That was an… interesting conversation you and Johnno had. How do you feel about that? The ‘love’ thing? And — sorry about the Ayckbourn play. You would have been great, and they’re silly not to see it. So there. Right, I’m gonna finish up here – have to grab lunch before I get Bri. I MISS you! I love you! Oceans of hugs!

(clicks)

Scene 7.4

OLIVIA

All right. So now we know who Bri is. I – (stops herself) I wonder if Bri turns up somewhere. Her voice I mean. I suppose we will find out. (looks outside) I think I will finish this now and defy the rain and go running – I always feel better after a good run. (lightly) It’s not like I’m going to celebrate Valentine’s Day – it’s a silly meaningless capitalist construct. (slight laugh, cheerfully) Also there is zero romance in my life, and that’s the way I like it.  I have other things to occupy my time. So, listeners, check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info, and, of course, listen to episodes. We are also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you think you may have known Kat or Jess or their friends twenty years ago I would be super  interested to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Our fantastic music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. The link is in the episode description. My name’s Olivia, (reads) thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.

(OUTRO MUSIC)

EPISODE 8: FEBRUARY 21-29, 2000

CONTENT WARNING

OLIVIA

Olivia here again. So another warning this week. My friend Tammi told me it’s called a content warning or trigger warning. Makes sense. Anyway. This time for homophobia, transphobia and verbal and emotional  abuse. Please take care of yourself, and if you need to, don’t be afraid to reach out and ask for help.

 (INTRO MUSIC)

Scene 8.1

OLIVIA

My name is Olivia, and you are listening to the Y2K podcast. How are you today, listeners? I do know there are a few of you now, which is exciting! Thank you, and thank you especially to those writing in – I will do an episode at some point where I try and answer some of your questions. So tonight I’m recording at the uni radio station studio – a friend of mine convinced them to let me use it and it is so much better than recording under a blanket in my room! Thanks Tammi! And thank you BurnFM! Though it’s quite late as it was the only time it wasn’t in use, and it’s a little spooky here in the basement… Never mind. Let’s head into today’s voice mails – there are a few more than usual today, though they are shorter. Last week Jess talked Bri down from a ledge, and Kat got a Valentine’s surprise from Johnno. Once again – welcome to the year 2000!

Scene 8.2

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

KAT

Oh Jess, just heard your latest, this is just a quick message before work – I am so so sorry your parents are being such absolute jerks. Give Bri a big hug from me – I know we’ve never met but I feel like I know her from all you’ve told me. And a big hug to you as well – don’t forget to take care of yourself in the middle of all this, OK? I’ll record a proper message soon – love you! Bye!

(clicks)

Scene 8.3

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

JESS

Thanks Kat! I love you! (beat) Everything is fairly stable now. Bri is here, the flight went well, and we’ve talked and talked and talked. Seems our parents never ever mentioned me to Bri, and when Bri said something – you know a general comment like “So I heard Jess is playing Gertrude in Hamlet this semester” they just ignored it. Actual example. I don’t get it. Must take so much energy for them. But I guess now they have no kids. I wonder what they’ll say to their friends. Anyways. Doesn’t matter. I’ll get back to you soon with more – love you!

(clicks)

Scene 8.4

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

KAT

Hi Jess! So glad things are stable. And I get that you and Bri have a LOT of talking to do. Five years of talking, right? But make sure you get sleep and food and that you get some time to yourself as well please? I know it’s not easy when Bri is having a crisis but you won’t be much help if you don’t take care of yourself too. OK? And I know this is so easy to say and so much harder to do, but just do it. For Bri if not for yourself, OK? OK! (pause) And don’t feel like you have to get back to me with a huge long message, or at all for a while. Of course I want updates, and I’m always here to listen, but I don’t want to add myself to your already mile-long to-do-list. (snort) Muddled metaphor, I know, but you know what I mean. All is ok here, so no worries. Okidoki? Love you! Oceans of hugs!

(clicks)

Scene 8.5

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

JESS

Kat. I just talked to Mom. It was – She – (starts crying, but gets it under control) I wouldn’t have picked up, but I was asleep and confused. It’s 4 am here. She — she yelled at me. About Bri and – somehow it was all my fault. I couldn’t get a word in. So I just – sat here. And then she said this was God’s punishment on her for reaching out to me. (beat) And that she’d told her friends at church today that – that – that I was dead.(sobs quietly) There’s something wrong with her. I see that. But it hurts so much. I was going to hang up on her but she beat me to it. And now – Bri’s asleep, of course, and I don’t know if I should tell her about this. It’s hard, Bri is in such a fragile place yet she is so strong. And so open and trusting despite all the garbage our parents have done. Yeah. I’ll tell her. Enough secrets. But first I’ll try to sleep some more. Always a relief to talk to you my dear. Thank you for being there. Love you!

(clicks)

Scene 8.6

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

JESS

Good morning Kat! TGI Saturday – I slept late and feel better. Got my coffee and chocolate croissant… Yes a chocolate croissant is breakfast, Kat! More breakfasty than those stinky cheese sandwiches you eat! Anyways. (takes a bite) Just wanted to leave a message that’s a little more zen than the last, um, five or so? I will be ok, and Bri will be ok, we will make our own family, and it will be wonderful. So there. (sips coffee) If Bri gets  up in the next hour or so I’m gonna suggest we go do something – we’ve been holed up talking since she arrived – we really needed to – but now I think it’s time to get outdoors and grab some fresh air. Maybe a hike? Might be easier to tell Bri about Mom’s latest horror surrounded by trees… I’ve heard there are some great trails around here. I’ll ask Maia and Tia, they’re bound to know. (sips coffee) So what are you up to, Kat? I feel like my crises have overshadowed everything lately. Things good at work? Johnno and you still happily dating non-exclusively? Any new auditions coming up? You know when I’m a famous playwright I’m going to write you the most incredible part, right? And we will make a smash-hit West End show together! (smiles through tears) Yay! I love you! Oceans of hugs!

(clicks)

Scene 8.7

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

KAT

Oh, Jess! So happy you are feeling a little better! And I hope you and Bri do end up going hiking – take lots of pictures, I’m sure it’s beautiful! I always find it easier to talk about difficult stuff while walking. Remember all those walks we took around Wood Green when we were freaking out about final production last year? Don’t know if I would have graduated without those. (takes sip of coffee) Would you believe I’m also having Saturday breakfast – though it’s about 13 hours later than yours (smiles). Time difference is strange! No stinky cheese today though, just had an egg sandwich (laughs). Which can be a little stinky too, I suppose… And coffee, always lots of coffee! (takes another sip) I’m at Johnno’s, he’s still asleep, so I’m borrowing his computer to send this. We’re doing really well – he actually asked me to be his girlfriend last night! (squeals) We’d been out with some friends of his – I was a little nervous but they were nice! Anyway just as we’d walked in the front door he grabbed me and pushed me up against the wall in the hallway and kissed me, and then he looked into my eyes and just (beat) asked. No-one’s ever asked me to be their girlfriend before. It felt tender and sexy and serious all at the same time. I said yes of course! (giggles) So we are now officially a couple and I couldn’t be happier. Lately I’ve been here almost every day – and night. So haven’t really seen much of (beat) Claire – or Shirin and Emma for that matter. Maybe I’ll stay at the flat tonight – have to do some laundry – I’m forever carrying underwear and t-shirts around and never get around to washing them. Anyway. Still haven’t –

(steps approaching)

JOHNNO

(sleepy, hugs KAT) Good morning sweetheart!

(JOHNNO nuzzles KAT’s neck, KAT squeals. They kiss.)

KAT

(happy) Good morning my love.

JOHNNO

(lets her go, steps away) Told you I don’t – I don’t want to use that word. (disdainful) Love. (mumbles) I’ve used it before.

KAT

(crushed) Oh. OK. Sorry. (pause)

JOHNNO

That’s all right, I forgive you sweetheart! (kisses her passionately) Is there coffee?

KAT

(flustered) No, sorry – Um, you’re not usually up this early. I can make–

JOHNNO

(interrupts) All right, you can’t fit everything into that sweet head of yours. You focus on being gorgeous, I’ll make coffee. (laughs) What were you up to anyway, reading all my e-mails?

KAT

No, of course not! I-

JOHNNO

(interrupts again) Joking! Can’t you take a joke sweetie? (laughs, kisses KAT again and leaves)

KAT

I- (sighs) Never mind. I was leaving a voicemail for Jess. (sighs again, sits down) Sorry Jess. I don’t know what I was talking about. Take care of yourself, and of Bri. I’ll call again soon.

JOHNNO

(yells from kitchen) I’m making pancakes – come have some!

KAT

(to JOHNNO) Coming! (to JESS) Bye!

(clicks)

Scene 8.8

OLIVIA

I- I- all right. That was a lot. Yeah. Heavy stuff. It’s funny, I get worried about what’s going to happen next, but it was twenty years ago – it’s already happened! And yet I know so little about it. Which is why if you know anything about Jess or Kat or their friends during this time I would like to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info, and, of course, listen to all our episodes. We are also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – on Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K podcast, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you have a minute, it would mean so much if you would rate and review us on Apple Podcasts. It can help others find the show, also it just makes me happy (smiles). Our awe-inspiring music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. The link is in the episode description. My name’s Olivia, (reads) thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.

(OUTRO MUSIC)

EPISODE 9: MARCH 1-5, 2000

(INTRO MUSIC)

Scene 9.1

OLIVIA

Hello everyone, welcome to the Y2K podcast! My name is Olivia, and I will be your tour guide as we time travel twenty years back in time. (laughs) All right, yeah, I am still working on that intro… I’m at the BurnFM studio again today, feeling a little less lost among all the tech in here. Thanks again, Tammi! So guess what I found yesterday? The website for the Free Online Voicemail service that Kat and Jess were using twenty years ago. It looked completely ridiculous – but I did some googling, and apparently websites in the nineties and early noughties all looked like that. I guess no-one ever bothered to take it down. Not sure if you could still record a voicemail on there, but their profiles were still searchable, which is a little creepy. I guess nothing really disappears once it’s been online. Like an old footprint – a fossil if you like. Two friends left fossils twenty years ago and now I’m digging them up, sorting them and sending them off in the world for all to… admire? Enjoy? Share? Something. All right, let’s get to it. Last week Jess’s mother reached new lows of horrible, and the ladies had breakfast in different time zones, and Johnno was odd about the word love again. Welcome to the year 2000!

 Scene 9.2

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

KAT

Hi Jess. (slight rustling of clothes) I’m folding laundry. I keep putting laundry off because it is just *so* BORING… Also I’m hardly ever home. But now I’m down to wearing my workout gear, so today is laundry day – yay! (smiles). I’m staying here tonight too, Johnno  has a work thing. We hardly ever stay here together, because – duh! – he has his own place with no sneaky flatmates. Speaking of flatmates, um, not sure if you want to know this but (beat) I think Rose broke up with Claire. I don’t know what it was about, but Claire seems to be in a really bad mood, and I haven’t seen Rose over here in a while. Talked to Emma about it in the kitchen this morning, and she thinks so too, but we’re both too chicken to ask… Anyway. That’s the laundry folded (puts laundry away in dresser) I have another load in the machine but that won’t be done for a while yet… Hang on. (opens window, light Sunday morning street noise, lights cigarette, blows out smoke, sighs) I tried to talk to Johnno about money last night. We’d been to dinner with his friends in Soho and had lovely Chinese food and when we got the bill Johnno just said “Let’s just split it in six parts!” like it was no big deal. I had ordered one dish and had one beer, because that was all I knew I had money for. The others – (inhales-exhales smoke) there were six of us, but you got that – had all had multiple dishes and many pints each. And when I told Johnno – in a low voice so the others wouldn’t hear – that I didn’t have money for that, and that I wanted to just pay for what I’d had, he says really loudly “Well, at least you’re gorgeous! Don’t worry, it’ll be my treat!”. I felt about five millimeters tall. I didn’t want to advertise my financial status to all his well-off friends with steady jobs and cars and apartments. It made me feel like a failure, this poor little out-of-work actor who gets by on bartending. So when we got home – to his place I mean – I brought it up. And he… Just doesn’t seem to get it. He says I can pay for ‘other things’ but the fact that he has money means we do much more expensive things, so even if he treats me a lot of the time – which is of course lovely of him – it doesn’t mean I can always pay for the other expensive things that I wouldn’t be doing if I wasn’t with him. You know? (inhales-exhales smoke) Last week I walked from his apartment in Chalk farm to work in Finsbury Park almost every day to save on bus fare. (puts out cigarette, closes window)   Turns out it’s nearly an hour’s walk each way so it took a lot of time.

(washing machine subtly starts spin cycle, increases during following)

KAT (continues)
Haven’t told him this. I feel… I feel ashamed to not have money. Which is ridiculous. Why is it shameful? I guess I didn’t feel quite as bad about it when we were students. Now I’m supposed to be an adult, a graduate who supports herself. Yeah. Not going so well. Anyway, Johnno and I argued. For the first time, really. He just wouldn’t see that I had a point, that my frustration was real. He kept trying to reassure me he would take care of me and I kept trying to tell him that wasn’t the poi nt. We were yelling. You know me. I don’t yell. It was freaky. We made up in the morning but- the issue is still there and I don’t know what-

(spin cycle at noisiest)

CLAIRE

(muffled yell) Who the fuck is doing laundry at this hour?

(KAT opens door)

KAT

Hey Claire. Sorry. Guilty. It’s almost do-

CLAIRE

(interrupts, furious) What the hell were you thinking? I was asleep!

KAT

(tries to remain calm) Well it’s almost noon, so-

CLAIRE

(interrupts) I was asleep!

KAT

(still trying to keep calm) I get that. Are- Are you OK?

CLAIRE

No! I’m not fucking OK! (storms off)

KAT

O–K. (mutters under breath) Jävla subba. (washing machine starts winding down, KAT closes door, sits down)(to JESS, near tears) Jess. That was really unpleasant. I hate getting yelled at. And there was no reason – there’s no rule about doing laundry in daytime. Well, you know all this. (small sob) Hate this! I start crying instead of getting angry. (exasperated) (sighs) I’d better go take care of that laundry now. Anyway, confirmed: Claire is *not* in a good place. Wow! (beat) So… (pulls herself together) let me know all about your hike, and how Bri is, and how you are, and everything else that’s going on. OK? Love you!

(clicks)

Scene 9.3

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

JESS

Hey Kat, so sorry you got yelled at, first by Johnno and then by Claire. She seems a little… unhinged. It’s weird, now that Bri’s here and everything I feel (beat) distanced from the pain of that break-up. Like the new pain of Bri and I basically being (beat) orphans ate up some of the old pain. (pause) Also, with Bri here I feel like I belong more, you know? Like she’s making this feel like home just by being here. It’s a little too early to say for sure, but Bri’s talking about possibly staying in Auckland, trying to get transferred to university here and finishing her degree. It won’t be until the spring semester though – which starts in August, very confusing! – so she’d have to get a job in the meantime. I hope she does stay! This past week has been so full of pain and misery yet it’s also been wonderful to connect with Bri again. We had the most incredible hike through unbelievable scenery, I took lots of pictures, I’ll have to get them double printed and send you some! And we talked and talked some more, and I told her about Mom, and it was awful but Bri said she’d rather know than not. So we’ve decided not to pick up Mom’s calls, either of us. Or Dad’s, but he’s not usually one for calling. (pause) I had my second therapy appointment today, with Antonio, which somehow seems a far too beautiful name for somebody as prosaic as a therapist. But I like him. He listens and thinks and lets me finish my rambling thoughts, and then he offers up a question or a comment that gets me thinking further. It’s still early days, but I think it’s helping… Let’s see. School is getting more fun – still breakneck-paced but we’re doing feedback sessions in groups which is very useful but also terrifying. One thing this degree is definitely teaching me is to not be so precious about my writing – I can’t double- and triple-check everything before letting anyone read it, I just have to get writing, and then pass it along for feedback. (very soft sound of front door opening in background) It’s taking some getting used to, but it seems to also unlock me creatively somehow, I don’t get in my own way as much, if you know what I mean. Yesterday I–

(slight footsteps, soft knock on door)

RACHEL

Jess? You there?

JESS

(gets up and opens door) Yeah. (smiles) Hi! Rachel!

RACHEL

(laughs) Hi. So Maia invited me over for dinner again – you want to help us make dumplings?

JESS

Um, sure! I’ll check if Bri wants to join in as well.

RACHEL

Cool, more the merrier, right?

JESS

(laughs)I just have to finish-

RACHEL

(interrupts with a smile) You voicemailing your friend again?

JESS

Yep. But I was just going to wrap it up, so-

RACHEL

OK. (smiles) See you in a bit then.

JESS

(closes door, smiles) Yeah. (to KAT) So, dumplings! Never made those before. You would know – is it hard? (laughs) You know I’m a little lost when it comes to cooking… Or a lot lost… Anyways, I’m sure it will be fun. Take care of yourself, my dear. Any exciting auditions lined up? Love you!

(clicks)

Scene 9.4

OLIVIA

So, seems things are looking a little better at Jess’s end. I’m a concerned for Kat though – all that yelling… Um, we will see what happens… Or what happened, really. Sort of feels like it’s happening now… Is it just me or do you feel that way too listeners? Either way, did you know Kat or Jess or their friends around the year 2000? I would like to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, and   that’s the number two. Also check out our beautiful webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info about the show and, of course, listen to all our episodes. We are also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – on Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you have a minute, it would mean so much if you would rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. Our jaw-dropping music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. The link is in the episode description. My name’s Olivia, (reads) thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.

(OUTRO MUSIC)

EPISODE 10: MARCH 6-12, 2000

(INTRO MUSIC)

Scene 10.1

OLIVIA

Good evening, (beat) here is the 9 o’clock news… (laughs) No! Just messing about. Couldn’t stop myself once I’d started with ‘good evening’ – why did I say that? (laughs, deep breath, tries to be serious) If you haven’t figured it out yet. I’m Olivia, being silly, and this is the Y2K podcast. (giggle) Tammi and I were winding each other up before we started recording and I guess I just can’t stop! Tammi’s agreed to stay in the studio with me today, so I don’t have to feel creeped out all alone in this basement. Say hi, Tammi!

TAMMI

(distant) Hello! (laugh)

OLIVIA

Hello! Of course Tammi’s only here to show you that I do have friends and am not a complete loner. All right? (laughs) Someone wrote in and said I seemed so lonely and I should find some nice ‘chums’. And someone else said I should get a boyfriend. (snorts) Not happening. But, yeah. I *have* nice ‘chums’ so don’t worry about me. But I like being alone too. Nothing wrong with that. In fact, pretty damned healthy if you ask me. Anyway. Last week Kat got yelled at, and Jess was going to make dumplings with (beat) Rachel. Let’s see what this week brings. (to TAMMI) Do you want to say it with me, Tammi?

TAMMI

(distant) OK!

BOTH

Welcome – to the year 2000!

Scene 10.2

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

JESS

Kat! Everything OK? Just haven’t heard from you in a little longer than usual… So… I had a great time the other night with Maia, and Bri, and Tia, and… Rachel. It felt so right to make food together and eat it. Um, yeah. That’s what you usually do with food. (laughs) I guess what I mean is that it felt normal and home-like and… comfortable. With everything that’s been happening I really need that, and I think Bri does too. I was a disaster at dumplings, though. It’s fiddly and you have to pleat them just so. Well, you probably know, oh you of incredible cooking skills! Does Johnno appreciate your cooking properly? He’d better – I *miss* it! Anyways, I just couldn’t get the pleats to stay pleated… Bri was a star, though, and Rachel was pretty good. Maia was a pro, of course, as was Tia when she got home from work. But then they make dumplings a lot. I ended up being in charge of making filling, I was pretty good at that. Mushrooms and kimchi and tofu – it was delicious! And we talked and laughed and I felt relaxed and (surprised) happy. It was beautiful. And… it was wonderful to see Rachel again. I’ll admit – to you but no-one else – that yes, of course I’m attracted to her. She’s fantastic. And so kind, and smart, and funny, and, well, gorgeous too. There’s a real spark, you know, and I get all babbling and silly ‘cause there’s no oxygen to my brain. It’s… been a long time since anyone made me feel like this. But… there is a but. I really can’t deal with anything romantic right now. I am very slowly getting to grips with everything after crisis on top of crisis and I’m not over Claire and I’m still overwhelmed with school and – and this is the most important reason – I want to focus on Bri. I want to make sure she is happy, well as happy as possible anyways, and that there is room for us to talk, and laugh and – cook! – and build our connection again. When that feels more stable, if Rachel’s still around and seems interested, then maybe we can try… something. (laughs) I don’t even know what people do anymore – and even less what they do in New Zeeland – I was in a relationship for almost three years that started off as a one-night-stand, hey, I have no clue! A date? Do people even go on dates?? Never mind. Not there yet, not sure I’ll ever get there. (sighs) I tried writing about my family. We had an assignment that was pretty unstructured, and was just ‘write what you know’ so I tried describing my parents, you know, as objectively as I could. They have good qualities as well as bad and I tried to bring them out but… it’s way too close. Just made me anxious. (sighs) Then I tried writing my coming-out-story – everyone has to write that at some point, right? And I never have. But of course my parents play a huge part in that as well. So in the end I wrote about… you. (nervous laugh) You don’t mind, do you? I wrote about meeting you and us becoming friends and flatmates and spending Christmas in Sweden with you and your Mom that year and how our friendship has always been about supporting each other. Nothing bad or incriminating, promise! I can send it to you if you like. Anyways. I need to start on my next assignment, where I have to make a phone book page somehow tell a story. Yep, same bananas professor. But it’s usually fun once I get into it. Have to finish that this afternoon, because – surprise! – Bri and I are going ballroom dancing! Yeah, shocked me too. But they have drop-in dance classes, and Bri was so excited when she saw it, that I just went with it. It’ll be a bonding sibling thing. Let me know what’s up at your end – you feel very far away today somehow. Sending oceans of hugs! Love you!

(clicks)

Scene 10.3

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

(Muffled party noises)

KAT

(drunk) Jess! I miss you! Sorry for the radio silence! I’m at Johnno’s, he’s – *we’re* having a party, I guess. Shirin and Emma are here, and loads of Johnno’s friends. I’m not sure they like each other very much. I feel… all wrong. (on the verge of tears) I’m wearing this dress Johnno gave me and it’s really nice, but, you know, not very me. It’s black, which is fine, but it’s short and poufy and in a shiny fabric which feels weird. Also (pause) I suppose it shouldn’t be a big deal, but (beat) Johnno just told me that this dress that I’m *wearing* used to belong to his ex. I mean, I shop for second-hand clothes all the time, and we’ve been shopping together at the vintage stalls in Camden Lock, but (pause) I just assumed he’d bought me a vintage dress, not that he’d found his ex’s dress in his closet and decided to give it to me. It feels weird. Is it weird? Or am I just being oversensitive? Johnno always says I’m too sensitive, that it’s upsetting when I cry. He says tears feel manipulative to him. Maybe he’s right. (tries to hold back tears) Damn! I need a cigarette! I just- it’s just that I’ve-

(party noises getting progressively more argumentative in the other room during the following)

KAT

(continues) I feel like he’s dressing me up as his ex. And in front of his friends who might well have seen her in this dress. And I had no idea. And I… I’ve been jealous of her. He’s talked about her quite a bit and… I’ve never been properly jealous before. I thought I wasn’t the type. And, dammit, the dress- the fucking dress is tight on me, so whatever else she is, she’s also thinner than me! Fuck! Oh, Jess, sorry to offload all this on you. I’m drunk, and tired, and upset, and I’ve been trying to cut down on smoking which isn’t helping.

(background party noise, sound of two people yelling, one glass breaking, then four people yelling, running feet, front door opens and slams shut)

KAT

(continues) What the hell is going on out there? (gets up)

(door opens, party noises increase)

SHIRIN

(slightly drunk, very angry) There you are! Emma and I are leaving!

KAT

Wha- what’s going on?

SHIRIN

That guy in there – Simon I think – is being an arse, and your *boyfriend* is defending him.

KAT

Wha-

SHIRIN

You coming?

KAT

I should-

SHIRIN

(putting on coat) Emma’s already outside, I’m going now.

KAT

OK. I’ll just tell Johnno-

SHIRIN

Fine. We will wait for exactly five minutes.

(SHIRIN leaves, front door opens and closes)

KAT

(calls into living room) Johnno? (beat) Johnno?

JOHNNO
(drunk) How’s my princess? You look so hot tonight… (kisses KAT)

KAT

Look, I’m going home with Shirin and Emma.

JOHNNO

No! You can’t leave! (grabs KAT and kisses her again) I have a strict policy against you leaving. Let me get you a drink!

KAT

(smiles) Nice reference, sweetie. I- (tempted) No. I think I should just go. We’ll talk tomorrow, OK? Go have fun with your friends.

JOHNNO

(pouts) But I wanna have fun with my *girlfriend*. (grabs at KAT again, but she slides away)

KAT

(opens front door) See you tomorrow, sweetheart. (gives JOHNNO a peck, to SHIRIN outside) Be right there Shirin! (remembers) Oh! (rushes to the computer) Sorry, Jess!

(clicks)

Scene 10.4

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

KAT

Hi Jess… (sigh) Sorry about last night. I was drunk, and everything was messed up. Turns out I also had PMS, which could explain some of the crying… Haven’t talked to Johnno yet today, I guess he’s still asleep. But Shirin and Emma filled me in on the details on the bus home last night. Apparently this guy Simon, a colleague of Johnno’s that I hadn’t met before, was trying to chat Emma up all night, I guess I just didn’t notice. At first she thought it was OK, he seemed nice enough, but it became more and more intrusive as he had more to drink, and when she said no he didn’t accept it and grabbed her and tried to kiss her. Emma of course started yelling at him, and Shirin supported her, and a glass got smashed by mistake. At this point Johnno jumped in and – the way Emma and Shirin tell it – was angry with them for making a big deal out of nothing. Also for breaking the glass, which was some special blah-di-blah design thing. I… I have to get his side of course. But either way I hate that they didn’t get along. They’ve met before, of course, many times, but my friends had never met Johnno’s friends before and I was hoping it would go really well. Yeah. It didn’t. (sighs) I miss you. I hope ballroom dancing was wonderful. (laughs) I know it makes your skin crawl to watch it, but maybe it’s better when you’re actually doing it? I’ll leave a more coherent message another time, and let you know how everything goes. And respond to some of the other things you were telling me about… I love you.

(clicks)

Scene 10.5

OLIVIA

Hang on, Kat didn’t even seem hungover! That’s not fair, she was pretty drunk the night before! Hmpf!

(TAMMI says something unintelligible)

OLIVIA

(continues) True, seems she left sort of early-ish… All right, I feel better now. But that guy Simon, and Johnno standing up for him? That is just revolting. I can’t believe Kat is so… so calm about it. I mean, yeah, she has to hear his side of the story and everything, but the fact that her friend has been sexually assaulted by her boyfriend’s mate is a really big deal.

(TAMMI says something unintelligible)

OLIVIA

(continues) You have to come closer, Tammi, *I* can barely hear you. What was that?

TAMMI

I said, it was a different time.

OLIVIA

I suppose it was. Long before hashtag-metoo and everything that followed. But still. Something isn’t quite right here. We will see what happens. (beat) Tammi’s helped me do a pre-recorded outro-thing, with all the contact stuff, so I will play that now. Saves me from recording the same thing every episode. Talk to you next week! Bye for now!

TAMMI

Bye!

OLIVIA

If you knew either Kat or Jess or any of their friends twenty years ago, I would like to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. The show is also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – on Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you have a minute, it would mean so much if you would rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. It can help others find the show. And a lso, it makes me very happy! If you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days! Our fantastic music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.

(OUTRO MUSIC)

EPISODE 11: MARCH 13-19, 2000

(INTRO MUSIC)

Scene 11.1

OLIVIA

Hello there, this is Olivia and the Y2K podcast. I’m back at the student radio station again – Tammi’s convinced them to let me record here for at least the rest of the semester. And I’ve convinced Tammi to come back and do the podcast with me sometimes. It’s good to have company every now and then! (beat) We had a very exciting field trip today, lots of fresh air and sunshine. And rocks of course! So now I’m tired in that happy way, you know? (stretches) I’m going to record this and then write a paper and then curl up and sleep! (beat) So last week Jess admitted to being attracted to Rachel, but decided to do nothing about it, and Johnno gave Kat his ex’s dress and also defended his horrible friend. Quite a week. Let’s see what we find out today. Welcome – to the year 2000!

Scene 11.2

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

KAT

Hi Jess. Had to re-listen to your last message as I wasn’t very focused the first time around… (slight laugh) Of course I already knew you were attracted to Rachel. Wicked obvious. (laughs) But I get why you’re not acting on it. And I get that what you need is time with Bri to establish some kind of… normal again I guess. And of course you can write about me, and about our friendship! And I’d love to read it – but I’ll probably cry! (laughs, gets serious) Though I’m trying to stop this whole bursting into tears all the time-stuff. It’s pretty childish, really, to cry all the time. Also I’m trying to give up smoking, but it’s hard. Very hard. In fact- (opens window, weekday evening traffic noise, lights cigarette, inhales, blows out smoke) Aahhh… (contented sigh) Only third one today. I’ll get there. But (inhales-exhales) it’s just so *good*… (sighs again) Johnno was very unhappy that I left his party Saturday. And I was really upset at how his friend Simon treated Emma. Johnno says he didn’t see any of that, he just heard Shirin and Emma yelling at Simon and one of his fancy design glasses breaking. He says of course he defended his friend against two people yelling and throwing glasses around. And I get that. I would defend *you* against any attack no matter what you’d done. (slight laugh) But I would also ask you about it, and try to figure out what happened. And if I thought you’d done something wrong, I’d try to talk to you about it. (inhales-exhales) That’s the bit that Johnno’s… not doing. And not intending to do either. He says blokes don’t talk about that kind of stuff. And… OK, fine, that’s his experience, but- I know plenty of men that *do* talk about all sorts of things to each other. So yeah, some of them are gay, and some of them are Swedish, and some of them are gay and Swedish, but… but the point is it shouldn’t matter. (puts out cigarette, closes window) Brr! Cold! It’s supposed to be spring but today’s been freezing. Well not actually freezing, but cold like- never mind. You get the point. So… Johnno and I argued over the whole party thing. He was disappointed I left, and said he felt that I chose Emma and Shirin over him. And… I did. Because they’re my friends, and one of them had just been treated appallingly. But that hurts him because he feels rejected. (sigh) He wants us to be everything to each other, and that’s lovely. I told him we’ve only just gotten together, we can’t be everything to each other yet. I have a history with my friends, with my family – well my mother, anyway, of love and support and stuff we’ve shared that makes them – you! – my.. rock. Rocks? (beat) Foundation. He can’t be that for me after… a month! And I can’t be that for him! I think he got it but I’m not sure. It’s all jumbled in my head now. We made up of course. (sighs) But I don’t think I’ll get Shirin and Emma to join me at one of Johnno’s parties anytime soon. I-

(00s mobile phone ringtone)

KAT

It’s my mother, um, I’ll call her back.

(KAT silences ringtone)

KAT

She’s worried about me. About this whole no-proper-job-thing. And she’s got the wrong idea about Johnno. I called her when I was upset about something, and now she can’t see the big picture. I know, it’s her job to worry about me. (laughs) I just wish she’d let me vent a little without it becoming this huge thing, you know? Anyway. Let me know what’s up with you! Love you!

 (clicks)

Scene 11.3

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

JESS

Hey Kat. Wow. Lot’s happening at your end. So… (sighs) I’m kind of in your Mom’s corner here. (gently) I’m concerned about you with Johnno. Giving you his ex’s dress is… weird. Not telling you about it is even weirder. The money thing is also troubling… (sighs) He seems to be… I don’t know, trying to… control everything? Maybe he’s insecure and needs reassurance from you? Oh, I don’t know. Every relationship has its ups and downs, but it seems you two have had more downs lately… And for such a new relationship that’s… concerning. Also, if his friend is being an asshole, he needs to acknowledge that. There must have been more people in the room who can corroborate Emma’s story, right? So it’s *not* a “he said-she said” type of thing. (sighs) I really wish I was there. I wish we could have this conversation in person. I’m not trying to rain on your parade my dear, I know Johnno means so much to you. I want to make sure he is kind to you. All right? So… my news… (laughs) Ballroom dancing was actually surprisingly fun – I think Kiwis are generally a pretty relaxed bunch, and the dance people were so nice and welcoming, and it didn’t feel so… stiff, you know? Watching Come Dancing on TV it looks like they have rods up their butts, you know? And these people weren’t anything like that! Turns out there are like a gazillion styles of ballroom, we started with the rumba and as expected Bri was incredible and I barely got by. But we had fun, and – believe it or not! – we’re going again next week! Who knows, maybe when we meet next I will be a fully fledged ballroom dancer in sequins and ruffles and glitter, oh my! (laughs) Or… maybe not. Also, they offered Bri a part-time job manning their front desk a few nights a week, which is wonderful. Manning? Ugh! All these silly gendered words. Wo-manning? (beat) Next week is Bri’s birthday, so I’m going to try and organize a dinner for her, we don’t really know enough people for a party but that’s all right (laughs) And I got her this beautiful scarf that I’m sure she will love. Hey! I just realized we won’t spend *our* birthday together this year, that sucks! Maybe we can do a phone call or something… If we can deal with the cost. And the time difference. Let’s pencil it in “August 27, birthday phone call with Kat and Jess”. All right? And hey, I’ll be 26 and you’ll be 24, so together we’ll be 50! Yikes! If we were both in London we’d have a huge party, right? Or maybe not… (laughs) Anyways. Take care of yourself, my dear. You’re the only Kat I’ve got, you know. And you are definitely one of my very favourite rocks. (smiles) Oceans of hugs!

(clicks)

Scene 11.4

OLIVIA

I agree. (hesitates) Johnno is doing some really odd things. Doesn’t seem like Kat is realizing quite *how* odd. It’s worrying – though of course it’s already happened. Yeah. It is funny they have the same birthday. I remember– (stops herself) Right. Also as a Geology student it’s funny to me how they seem to think rocks are universally hard and solid. Ever heard of sedimentary rocks? Like limestone? (laughs) I’m going to go write my Geology paper (yawns) and then sleeeeeeeeep. Hard – like an igneous rock! (laughs) Until next week brilliant listeners, good night…

OLIVIA

If you knew either Kat or Jess or any of their friends twenty years ago, I would like to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. The show is also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – on Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you have a minute, it would mean so much if you would rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. It can help others find the show. And a lso, it makes me very happy! If you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days! Our fantastic music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.

(OUTRO MUSIC)

EPISODE 12: MARCH 20-26, 2000

(INTRO MUSIC)

Scene 12.1

OLIVIA

(trying to sound cheerful) Hey there, I’m Olivia, and this is the Y2K podcast! (beat) I’m a little low today. Everyone is worried about the Corona virus, and while Birmingham hasn’t been hit that hard, it really feels like we are living in scary times. Also talked to my mum earlier and… Meant to tell her about the podcast, but there is so much else going on that I didn’t get that far. She asked if I was coming home for Easter and I’m like… Why? I didn’t last year. And it’s not like traveling is encouraged right now. Also we’ve never celebrated Easter except for eating lots of chocolate. (small laugh) We’re non-religious chocoholics! And I can eat chocolates here without getting on a plane. I’m planning on maybe a hike, and then holing up with a good novel – all I ever read these days is for uni – and then lots of those celebratory chocolates. And no interfering parents… Anyway. So last week Johnno wanted to be Kat’s rock, Kat ignored her mum’s phone call, and Jess expressed some doubts about Johnno. Let’s see what they’re up to today! Welcome… to the year 2000!

Scene 12.2

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

JESS

Hey Kat, listen, (carefully) I hope you’re not upset that I brought up some concerns about you and Johnno in my last message… I just want you to be happy. And if Johnno makes you happy that is wonderful. Right? And you can vent all you like with me and I won’t lose sight of the big picture. Promise. Pinky swear. (beat) Yesterday Rachel was here again and I swear I cannot think straight when she’s around. Whoosh! Despite this we manage to have the most incredible meandering conversations. Yeah. Anyways… I’m busy prepping for Bri’s birthday – probably overdoing it to a ridiculous degree because I want it to be the *best* *birthday* *ever*. (tense laugh) Yes I’m overcompensating, but I think I’m allowed. I want Bri to feel like she has a family and a home here. I’ve booked this private dining room at the pub on the corner and lots of pub food… It’ll be us, Maia and Tia and Rachel and a couple of other people they know, and some of the ballroom dancing people – we’ve only been twice and Bri doesn’t start working there until next week but they are so nice and so I invited them on impulse – Bri doesn’t know. I was thinking of inviting some people from university as well – but Bri hasn’t met them so I guess that would be weird. But yes, I do have some people from school who are – well maybe not friends but hopefully getting there. I talk mostly to Helena, who’s a little quiet but so funny and silly and writes the most achingly beautiful poetry, and to Gavin, who raced through undergrad so is younger than everyone else, and has this wonderfully sarcastic sense of fun and is probably the one person in our whole year who will succeed as an actual fiction writer. Anyways. Maybe I should invite them too so it doesn’t feel like a sad, tiny celebration? (exasperated sound) I just want it to be good! (breathes in-out) Right, breathing… Crap. (breathes slowly) I need to calm down about this. (breathes slowly) Seeing my therapist tomorrow, maybe he will help… (another deep breath) I bought cute decorations today. Happy 21st! Balloons and stuff. You know. (smiles) Oh, remember your 21st? Also my 23rd… We didn’t want to deal with people so we had a flatmate get-together, you, me, Shirin and… Lee! Yeah. That was fun. And this will be fun too. (deep breath) Take care my dear. I love you!

(clicks)

Scene 12.3

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

KAT

Hi Jess, OK, sounds like you are getting a little too stressed out by this party planning. I am sure Bri will love it, and you don’t need to invite more people or make it huge – sounds like you have all the ingredients needed for a great night – food, friends and silly decorations (laughs). So try to chill a little on this one, OK? Also…(beat) It’s OK. It *was* hard to hear you say you were concerned about me and Johnno. (sighs) But I can’t blame you really – I think I only give you one side of the story. Johnno and I have our issues like everyone else, but there are so many good things going on too. (smiles) Like yesterday I found out I got this TV ad for – you won’t believe this – for IKEA! – and he was so happy for me and bought me the biggest bouquet of flowers I’ve ever seen! I’m looking at it right now and it takes up half of my room! (happy sigh) It feels a little silly somehow to be in an advert for a Swedish brand, but that’s why I got it. So not complaining! And, you know, we have so much fun together. He makes me laugh, and think, and feel special, and brings me to all these amazing events and shows and everything. It’s like he’s showing me a whole new London that I never knew before, it’s amazing! (giggle, grows more serious) Also, we talked some stuff out last week and, well, cleared the air I guess. Wait, talk out? Clear up? Have out? Ah, you know what I mean! I think he’s grasping the money issue better from my perspective, and he agrees that his friend Simon behaved badly towards Emma, though he only relented on that point when his other friend told him what they’d seen… On the other hand, I can’t blame him for being loyal to his friends, I am too, and I really value that. (pause) So, back to my TV ad! (delighted squeal) I’ll be a woman who is incredibly good at assembling Billy bookshelves, and who just churns them out and builds a whole library while her husband does the dishes. Yes, typecasting! As you know I *am* incredibly good at assembl ing IKEA furniture, though I didn’t get a chance to show that in the audition (laughs). We’ll be filming it in a studio in Hampstead in a few weeks, and I can’t wait!

(muffled voices in distant background)

Also – it pays real money which is such a relief. Won’t help in the long run but is very nice right no-

(JOHNNO opens door)

JOHNNO

Hello sweetheart! (kisses KAT)

KAT

(surprised but pleased) Johnno! I thought you were still at work!

JOHNNO

I left early to see you sweetie. I booked a table at Pied à Terre tonight to celebrate your TV ad.

KAT

Wow! OK. That’s- (beat) That’s lovely, but I have plans with the flatmates tonight.

JOHNNO

(annoyed) Really?

KAT

Yeah, it’s quiz night at the pub round the corner and we used to go all the time, but I haven’t been in ages, so we decided to go tonight. (beat) I guess I forgot to tell you, sorry about that.

JOHNNO

But I made reservations. And… I’m sure we talked about doing something tonight.

KAT

Did we? I don’t remember that.

JOHNNO

We did, yesterday.

KAT

Oh, OK. (beat) I’m sorry. I must have gotten mixed up. (beat) All right, I’ll cancel the quiz night.

JOHNNO

(smiles) Good. (kisses KAT)

KAT

Right. (pause) So when’s the reservation? And… what on earth should I wear? (starts rummaging in closet)

JOHNNO

Anything you like, sweetie. A sexy dress maybe?

KAT

(distracted) Yeah. (sniffs her armpit) Hm. Do I have time for a shower?

JOHNNO

(looks at watch) Not really, we need to leave in about twenty minutes.

KAT

OK. (looks in dresser, in closet again) Maybe this one…

JOHHNO

Or maybe the one you wore at the party?

KAT

No! I can’t wear that. It’s- (beat) It hasn’t been washed. (deep breath) This one’ll have to do.

(discards jeans and t-shirt, puts on dress, sound of zipper struggle)

JOHNNO

Let me help you with that. (zipper) Wow. You look gorgeous in everything sweetheart. (kisses KAT)

KAT

(smiles) Thank you dar- sweetie. OK. (looks around room) Hang on! I think I’m still recording for Jess! (laughs, to computer) Sorry Jess! I think I was pretty much done. Have a great week, talk to you soon! (beat) Oceans of hugs!

JOHNNO

(questioning) Oceans?

(clicks)

Scene 12.4

OLIVIA

(laughs, mimics) “Oceans?” (laughs again) Sorry. That sounded funny. An IKEA ad, that’s not bad! I wonder if I could find it on Youtube… Probably not, too old! Also I want tell Jess to relax a little… In a way it’s like they are characters to me at this point. Even though I know they were actual people and of course still are actual people now, twenty years later, this world of theirs, at this time… it’s all *very* different from the people I know today. We’re more the same age, and they seem much easier to relate to. I suppose… I always thought of my parents as… not old… but static. Like I’m the kid so I am doing all the growing and changing and they are done with all that. But lately they… are changing things, and changing (hesitates) as people and doing things they never used to do and… well, it freaks me out. They’re supposed to be stable, dammit! (sigh) I know that’s not fair. Or reasonable. (small laugh) But maybe listening to all these voice mails and hearing my mum as a younger, less sure and… unformed version of herself is helping me understand her a little better now as well. That’s the idea, anyway. (beat) All right, enough rambling for today. Take care of yourselves, listeners. Stay safe and healthy in this scary world. Talk to you next week. Here comes the outro. Bye!

OLIVIA

If you knew either Kat or Jess or any of their friends twenty years ago, I would like to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. The show is also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – on Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you have a minute, it would mean so much if you would rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. It can help others find the show. And a lso, it makes me very happy! If you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days! Our fantastic music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.

 (OUTRO MUSIC)

EPISODE 13: MARCH 27-31, 2000

(INTRO MUSIC)

Scene 13.1

OLIVIA

Hello everyone, Olivia here, with the Y2K podcast. Spring is here at last – today has been a glorious sunny day and it is *finally* starting to smell properly like spring! I’ve been out running and feel all energized and happy. Though we were supposed to have a field trip today and of course that didn’t happen as all my courses have moved online now… (sighs) So… I’ve got some listener e-mails, thank you so much. One person who wanted to be anonymous asked about- well they basically asked what I was thinking putting these voice mails out into the world like this. If I’d thought about what I am doing releasing these very personal stories into the world. And… I think that is absolutely valid. I am not really being fair on my mum and her friend doing this. Not to mention all the other people involved. (beat) Not that I knew there would be anyone but Kat and Jess on those tapes! That was definitely a surprise. Another surprise was how emotional and personal and dramatic and… raw things are on the voice mails. I suppose I thought they would be more like regular voice mails, you know? More like short check-ins and mundane descriptions of everyday life. (sighs) When I started I was- (voice wavers slightly) I was angry at my parents. Disappointed. And upset. And there was so much about this time that I didn’t know. I thought I would play some chit-chatty messages and hopefully get a few people to listen and maybe find someone who knew more about what was going on with my parents in 2000, who could answer some of the questions I have that I don’t know how to ask my parents. I definitely didn’t expect… all this. And now I don’t feel like I can stop. I’ve got some leads and I feel like this podcast and you, wonderful listeners, could lead me to some of the answers I want. So I’ll go on. But yes, I will tell my mum and her friend. I just have to find a good time to do it. (beat) Right… last week Jess went overboard party planning for Bri, and Kat got a surprise fancy dinner. Welcome to the year 2000!

Scene 13.2

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

JESS

Oh Kat, last night was.. bad. Fuck. (beat) Bri got visibly stressed out by the random group  of people, and it was such a weird dynamic of cliques who didn’t know each other, also it turns out the ballroom dancing people don’t drink, which is fine in every way except it made Bri feel that she shouldn’t drink either, and that made me feel like I shouldn’t drink, and the two people in that room who would have actually benefited most from a beer or two to de-stress didn’t have any, which made it worse. I wanted it to be fun and relaxed and for Bri to feel appreciated, but I ended up getting completely worked up about every little detail and (beat) I- I yelled at the bar staff. About the beermats being the wrong color. I know, it sounds ridiculous. (small sad laugh) Like a bridezilla! Crap. (sighs) You were right, as always, when you said to tone it down a little. But I was so caught up in everything that I couldn’t stop. I knew deep down that I was overdoing everything but it just… snowballed. (sighs) I guess it turned more or less all right  after a while, though. Maia got Bri talking about horror movies, and that of course led to The Blair Witch Project and Bri has lots to say on that. Turns out Gavin also loves horror, so he could join in. Rachel, being wonderful as always, distracted me with, well herself, but also food and sympathy. And everyone else got over being incredibly awkward and settled on being only medium awkward with each other… I think the food was all right, though I hardly tasted any of it. People left semi-early, but who could blame them? Ugh. I tried to talk to Bri after the party, to explain, but she avoided me and went straight to bed. And I get it. (sighs) At least I have no physical hangover today, just an emotional one. Oh Kat, I’m a wreck. I spend so much energy on getting everything done in school and trying to take care of Bri that I- I- (verge of tears) There’s nothing left. I feel empty. And so very tired. Like I could sleep for a week. But then when I do try to sleep I can’t relax. I just lay there and all the thoughts and doubts I haven’t made time for during the day pop up and demand attention. And it’s like every single thing is of equal – and enormous – significance. Like the fact that I said a slightly weird thing about bunnies to Helena last night looms just as large as the fact that I gave Bri a crap birthday party. Along with thirty other things. It’s so noisy in here, I don’t know how to deal with it. (cries) Kat, I-

(gentle knock on door)

JESS

(wipes tears) Yes?

BRI

Can I come in?

JESS

Bri! Yes! Of course!

(BRI opens door)

BRI

(smiles) Hi sib.

JESS

Hi. (swallows tears) I’m so sorry about last night, Bri.

BRI

(opens arms) Come here.

(They hug. Jess sobs a little.)

BRI

(continues) It wasn’t that bad.

JESS

(pulls BRI with her to sit) Really?

BRI

Well…

JESS

(tentative smile) I yelled at the bar staff.

BRI

(smiles) Yeah, you did.

JESS

I was… pretty stressed.

BRI

I know.

JESS

Everyone tried to tell me to not make too big a thing out of this party, that I was overcompensating, and I knew they were right, I just couldn’t stop myself.

BRI

(smiles) Gavin’s cool. He’s got the entire Nightmare on Elm Street movie collection on VHS.

JESS

(smiles) I didn’t know that.

BRI

See? I wouldn’t have known that if you hadn’t invited him.

JESS

Right. (laughs) Friends again?

BRI

Always. (stands up) Brunch?

JESS

Yes. (remembers) I just have to finish up this message for Kat.

BRI

Hm. Cool. (to door)

JESS

(smiles) Love you Bri.

BRI

Love you sib.

(BRI leaves, closes door)

JESS

Oh Kat. So that was Bri. And she’s not mad at me. (relieved sigh) Feel better now. But… still tired. Yeah. Have to figure out how to deal with that. My therapist suggested anti-depressants last time. He said they can even out the highs and the lows. And I’m sure they can, but it feels weird, you know? If I start altering my body chemistry who knows what will happen? Like when that doctor put me on birth control pills to “regulate my period” and all they did was make my period pain worse and my sex drive plummet to zero. I don’t usually respond well to medication that does anything more than relieve pain…

(knock on door)

MAIA

(muffled) Brunch is almost ready!

JESS

(opens door) Thanks Maia. (beat) Oh, that smells wonderful!

MAIA

(smiles) Bri is making French toast.

JESS

Oh wow. (verge of tears)

MAIA

You all right?

JESS

Yes. (beat) Very all right. Thanks. (smiles)

MAIA

(smiles) Right. See you in the kitchen.

JESS

(closes door, sits down at desk) Kat. I should finish up so I don’t get interrupted again. (smiles) And so I can go have brunch. Dad used to make French toast sometimes on Sundays when we were kids. It was a special treat. And it feels right that Bri’s making it now. (beat) Let me know what’s up with you. Kat. Did you have a good time at the fancy restaurant? Also, don’t forget to book another quiz night with the flatmates, you need to keep up the tradition, especially now I’m not there to remind you. Love you!

(clicks)

Scene 13.3

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

KAT

Jess! It was great to finally hear Bri’s voice! Next time you have to make her say hi, OK? And I’m sure the party wasn’t quite as bad as you thought it was. Even if it was, people won’t mind too much. It’s huge for you, and made huger by the fact that you are depressed and not sleeping, but for most people a so-so party is just something that happens that they don’t think twice about. OK? (beat) Notice how I slipped in the word depression? Because I think that’s probably what’s going on. Don’t you? And… I know about depression, remember? My mother’s been on anti-depressants more or less her whole life. So if your therapist says you should consider medication, you should consider medication. And they’re not the same type of medication as birth control pills, so I’m not buying that excuse. Also there are lots of different types, and your doctor can help you find the right one for you. (beat) Lecture over. (smiles) I just don’t want you to dismiss something that has a very good chance of making you feel better. Okidoki? (laughs) OK, so now that I’ve lectured you we can move onto my amazing news – Johnno and I are moving in together! Well, technically I’m moving in with him, but who cares about technically? I am very excited – I’ve never lived with a boyfriend before. Well, you know that. (laughs) We got talking about it, and I’m over there practically all the time anyway, and he suggested I simply… not leave. He’s very generously offered to let me pay the same rent I’m paying now, even though his flat is of course *much* more expensive. Our flat soon! I’m so happy! This whole lugging stuff around in my handbag is getting really old – plus I never have what I need when I need it, it’s always at the other place. So I talked to Shirin today, and handed in my four-week-notice, but I’m moving tomorrow! I have to pack all my stuff – and figure out where it all goes at Johnno’s place – *our* place! Have to get used to saying that. (laughs) I’m so excited! (hums I’m so excited) He needs to give up some closet space – and some bookshelves! And there is no bathroom cabinet so not sure what to do (beyond excited) We have to go to IKEA! We can be one of those couples that go to IKEA! Though we won’t argue like those couples, we’ll just buy great cheap stuff and have meatballs for lunch! It’ll be like introducing Johnno to a piece of Swedish culture! Well, I’m sure he’s been to IKEA, but not with an actual Swedish person! And I can buy salty liquorice!! Yay!! He probably hasn’t had it before – remember when you tried it? You were very brave, but I know it’s definitely not your thing… (laughs) OK, I have to go start packing! I hope you can *breathe* a little, you know? Seems like it’s been one thing after another for you. Take some you-time, OK? And remember: you are amazing and can do anything. Just breathe. (breathes) Love you!

 (clicks)

Scene 13.4

OLIVIA

(laughs) I actually like salty liquorice! Probably one of very few people at this uni who does! (beat) I’m glad Jess ended up being open to anti-depressants. Her attitude seems very foreign to me. But I guess times have changed. Also my parents have always been such advocates of medication for various ailments, including depression, and vaccines, and… Yeah. Sometimes it’s good that times change, right? (beat) So you’ve heard me talk about our Patreon in the outros – it’s where you can support the show through monthly donations, and we try to come up with fun things to share with you to say thank you. We’ve recorded the first Patreon-exclusive episode, Tammi and me. (slight laugh) I have no control over it really – Tammi runs the whole thing which is perfect. All I have to do is just show up and talk! We had a lot of fun, and our wonderful Patreon supporters can hear the first Tammi’s Takeover in about a week! Excited to hear what you think! That’s all for today – stay safe out there – here’s the outro.

OLIVIA

If you knew either Kat or Jess or any of their friends twenty years ago, I would like to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. The show is also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – on Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you have a minute, it would mean so much if you would rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. It can help others find the show. And a lso, it makes me very happy! If you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days! Our fantastic music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.

(OUTRO MUSIC)

EPISODE 14: APRIL 1-9, 2000

(INTRO MUSIC)

Scene 14.1

OLIVIA

Happy Easter, to those who celebrate! And happy April to everyone! This is Olivia and the Y2K podcast, and I am heading towards some glorious days off from uni where I will enjoy fresh air and read some novels. I got the latest Holly Black in January but haven’t read it yet, so that’s top of my list. And hopefully a hike or two. I can’t wait! (beat) Onto the voice mails. Last week Jess calmed down a little and Kat decided to move in with (slight hesitation) Johnno. Anyway. Welcome to the year 2000!

Scene 14.2

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

JESS

Kat! Wow. Moving in with Johnno. Congratulations! I guess you’re already moved in by now, that’s… quick. But, yeah, great. (sighs) I’m sorry. Don’t mean to sound so… fake. (warmly) I’m happy that you are so happy. (smiles) And I hope you had fun at IKEA – scoping out the place before shooting the big commercial, huh? Anyways. I’m a little worried you’re moving so fast – Ha! Moving! I’m hil-ar-i-ous! – but I’m happy as long as you’re happy. And I’m glad you are getting some new stuff, you have to make it yours, you know? Not only when it comes to getting space in the closet and the bathroom cabinet, make it yours with some Kat-ness, some pillows, and books, and flowers, and silly posters, all those little details that claim a space and make it yours. (beat) Rachel was here again today, she helped Maia carry stacks and stacks of damaged books from the library – their basement got flooded so they had to discard loads. It’s sad when books get destroyed, but I love that Maia is making them into art. Anyways, what I wanted to get to is that Rachel still makes me all dizzy and flushed. It’s not going away, if anything it is stronger. I… I might have to do something about that. (sigh) Also I’m slowly calming down after the birthday party mess. Bri is so great. Once I stop stressing about everything I see that she doesn’t actually need me to tie myself in knots wanting to magically make everything perfect for her. She’s all right just being here, and talking, and finding small ways to heal. And it’s such a relief. (breathes) Why do I do this? (small laugh) Why do I always feel like I have to fix everything? (sighs) Sometimes I’m exhausted with myself, you know? (beat) All right. I will be open to medication. It’s just- Yeah. (smiles) Going to stop making excuses. At least for now. I’m going to   make myself a cup of Earl Green and get going on the reading for tomorrow. Let me know how everything is – I hope you are in newly cohabitating bliss (smiles). Hey, wasn’t there some cool Swedish word for cohabiting? Simba or something? (laughs) Yeah so even I can tell that’s wrong! But hope you’re a happy simba anyway! (smiles) I love you!

(clicks)

Scene 14.3

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

SHIRIN

(a little uncertain) Hi Kat, it’s Shirin. You’re not answering your phone, or my texts, so I guess I’ll give this odd voicemail thing a go. I just wanted to (beat) see if everything’s all right. You moved out so quickly and I hardly had time to talk to you. So… I hope Johnno… I hope Johnno’s being nice. All right? That’s all. And we’re off to quiz night next week, join us! Oh, and your Mum called the flat – I suppose she didn’t know you moved? I told her. I hope that was all right. (starts saying something but stops herself) Right. Bye!

(clicks)

Scene 14.4

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

KAT

Hey Jess. Thanks for the well-wishing. Not quite in bliss but a happy *simba* all the same (smiles). Always fancied myself a lion, or even better a lion king! (hums “Can You Feel the Love Tonight”) It’s ´sambo´ actually, so you weren’t too far off (small laugh). Literally means ‘co-live’… I went to IKEA on my own in the end. Johnno had to work. Which is fine. I got some closet organizers and a lamp shade and some plants and, you know, some random stuff like a whisk and some oven mitts. Then I hauled it all back on the bus which took forever, but I was pretty happy when I got back. And I got some salty licorice of course. Licorice…  Johnno bravely tried it but spit it out even faster than you did! It was pretty funny. So I’ve been decorating a little, and got all my clothes up. Most of my books are still in a box, there’s not really any room for them yet. Will have to drag Johnno to IKEA so we can buy and haul home a bookshelf! But I do have a pile of books on my side of the bed, which is nice. (beat) And yes, keep an open mind about medication. When’s your next therapy   appointment? I’m off to work in a minute, promise to leave a longer message next time. Love you!

(clicks)

Scene 14.5

(Modem dial-up tone) (click)

CLAIRE

(energetic, nervous but hides it) Hey Jess-ica, surprise! It’s me. Claire, in case you’ve forgotten my voice. Yeah, Kat showed me how this thing works a few weeks ago and I figured it’s a nice cheap way to get a message through. Straight to the point: Kat’s being really strange. She moved in with that creepo boyfriend of hers last week and honestly it’s not making much of a difference here since she was hardly ever around, but she just grabbed her stuff and left when we were all out. And her room is still a mess of discarded shit. Also Kat’s mum called yesterday and didn’t even know she’d moved. We think something’s off. We had a kitchen palaver about it and I was nominated to message you. Tried to tell them you’d probably prefer to hear from anyone but me, but they insisted. So here I am, reporting for duty. (fake US accent) Ma’m yes ma’m (more serious) Kat’s not been herself for weeks. It’s like she’s (beat) acting some happy version of herself but can’t quite keep it up. Not sure what you can do from the land of the Kiwis but you could always get through to her when no-one else could, so, give it a go, right? (pause) And I guess you heard about Rose. Yeah. I bet on the wrong horse. (fake Italian accent) The shit-eh does the-happen. (unhappy laugh) Bye then.

(clicks)

Scene 14.6

OLIVIA

Claire. Right. I don’t get it. Why would the flatmates think Claire would be the best person to message Jess? Why not Shirin or Emma? That makes no sense. You don’t make recent exes interact unless you know they get on really well. And these two definitely don’t. But-

(OLIVIA’s mobile rings, it’s on silent so only makes those static disturbance noises.)

OLIVIA

(continues) Sorry! Forgot to turn my mobile off. It’s my mum, better get that. I think I was pretty much done anyway, dear listeners. I’ll say bye for now, and pop on the outro, hang on… (beeps and clicks, the outro does not start) Hey mum… I’m fine, actually I just finished-… All right…. You… what?… She’s-… What do you mean you’re-… (very upset)  I…  I didn’t know. I thought it was temporary. Why didn’t you tell me? I thought I… Bloody hell. (angry) Did you two think I wasn’t interested? That I didn’t care what’s going on in my own family? (almost crying) Well, you thought wrong…. Yeah… (the other person is upset, OLIVIA calms) Mum, I-… Of course… Yeah… No, I’m (beat) all right… Do you want me to come for Easter after all?… You’re sure?… I could check if there are any cheapo student rates left?… Right… I’ll stay here… (deep breath) Talk to you later?… Love you too, mum. (hangs up, beep) (pause, mutters) Didn’t it start? (some clicks) Why didn’t it start…There… (deep sigh, cut short by click and outro starting)

OLIVIA

If you knew either Kat or Jess or any of their friends twenty years ago, I would like to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. The show is also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – on Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you have a minute, it would mean so much if you would rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. It can help others find the show. And a lso, it makes me very happy! If you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days! Our fantastic music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.

(OUTRO MUSIC)

EPISODE 15: APRIL 10-16, 2000

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EPISODE 16: APRIL 17-23, 2000

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EPISODE 17: APRIL 24-30, 2000

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EPISODE 18: MAY 1-7, 2000

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EPISODE 19: MAY 8-14, 2000

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EPISODE 20: MAY 15-21, 2000

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EPISODE 21: MAY 22-31, 2000

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EPISODE 22: JUNE 1-4, 2000

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EPISODE 23: JUNE 5-11, 2000

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EPISODE 24: JUNE 12-18, 2000

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EPISODE 25: JUNE 19-25, 2000

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EPISODE 26: JUNE 26-30, 2000

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EPISODE 27: JULY 1-9, 2000

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EPISODE 28: JULY 10-16, 2000

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EPISODE 29: JULY 17-23, 2000

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EPISODE 30: JULY 24-31, 2000

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EPISODE 31: AUGUST 1-6, 2000

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EPISODE 32: AUGUST 7-13, 2000

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EPISODE 33: AUGUST 14-20, 2000

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EPISODE 34: INTERLUDE – AUGUST 27, 2000

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EPISODE 35: AUGUST 28-31, 2000

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EPISODE 36: SEPTEMBER 1-10, 2000

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EPISODE 37: SEPTEMBER 11-17, 2000

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EPISODE 38: SEPTEMBER 18-24, 2000

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EPISODE 39: SEPTEMBER 25-30, 2000

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EPISODE 40: OCTOBER 1-8, 2000

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EPISODE 41: OCTOBER 9-15, 2000

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EPISODE 42: OCTOBER 16-22, 2000

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EPISODE 43: OCTOBER 23-31, 2000

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EPISODE 44: NOVEMBER 1-5, 2000

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EPISODE 45: NOVEMBER 6-12, 2000

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EPISODE 46: NOVEMBER 13-19, 2000

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EPISODE 47: NOVEMBER 20-26, 2000

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EPISODE 48: NOVEMBER 27-30, 2000

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EPISODE 49: DECEMBER 1-10, 2000

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EPISODE 50: DECEMBER 11-17, 2000

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EPISODE 51: DECEMBER 18-24, 2000

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EPISODE 52: DECEMBER 25-31, 2000

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EPILOGUE: DECEMBER 31, 2000

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BEHIND THE SCENES 1

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BEHIND THE SCENES 2

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BEHIND THE SCENES 3

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BEHIND THE SCENES 4

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BEHIND THE SCENES 5

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BEHIND THE SCENES 6

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