Here you can find transcripts for all of Y2K season 1.
Episodes
Downloadable PDF transcripts can be found at the beginning of each episode below.
Specials
Halloween Special 2020: 2K20 – A Y2K Horror Parody
Patreon Bonus Episodes
Please note that these bonus episodes are Patreon-exclusive. Therefore, transcripts for bonus episodes are password protected. If you are a Patreon supporter and have forgotten your password, please DM us on Patreon and we will be happy to sort it out. Thank you so much for your support.
BONUS EPISODE 1
BONUS EPISODE 2
BONUS EPISODE 3
BONUS EPISODE 4
Behind-the-Scenes Episodes
Please note that transcripts for these episodes may take longer than others, as they are not scripted. We will try our best to get them to you as close to release date as possible.
BEHIND THE SCENES 1: Cast Interview 1 – Janis, Adam, Charlotte
BEHIND THE SCENES 2; Cast Interview 2 – Kirsty, Felicity, Lorcan
BEHIND THE SCENES 3: Cast Interview 3 – Maddy, Nerys, Anjali
PROLOGUE: DECEMBER 31, 1999
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 0.1
(New Year’s Eve 1999. A flat in north London. A crowded party. Everyone is very drunk. Door opens. JESS and KAT sneak into a room, JESS wants to show KAT something on the computer. Giggling. Party noises.)
JESS
Come on! Close the door!
(door shuts, party noises abate)
KAT (giggles)
What? I wanna party like it’s 1999! (tries to sing the Prince song but can’t remember the words)
(JESS sits down, computer clicks, modem dial-up tone)
JESS
(distracted) Well it won’t be 1999 for much longer… (mutters) Where is that link?
KAT
I think Johnno wants to *kiss* me. (makes kissy noises) He keeps staring at me. He’s ok I guess…
JESS
I want to show you what I found yesterday. (computer clicks) Look!
KAT
What? It’s just loading… charging… wait what’s it called?
JESS
Remember I’m leaving tomorrow? And that phone calls to New Zealand are expensive? Not to mention the time difference thing? (computer dings) Well, ta-da!
KAT
Ta-what? (sits down) Wait, (reads) Free Online Voicemail – the easy way to stay in touch… Catchy slogan (more serious, slightly more sober) You mean we can leave each other voice mails? For free??
JESS
Yup! I just need to figure out how to get internet once I’m in Auckland, and then we’re all set! Of course the dial-up connection costs a little, but —
KAT
(interrupts) That’s perfect! (suddenly sad) But I will miss you. So much.
JESS
I’ll miss you too my dear. Damn! We said no tears and I’m sticking to it! (beat) Look, I’ve set you up as KatLondon and me as JessAuckland, so we can find each other.
KAT
Damn! (holds back tears) I mean, that’s great. And I *am* happy for you. It’s just — (tries to be cheerful) what if some serious accounting person moves into your room and just kills all the fun?
JESS
And paints my walls cafe au lait? Yuck!
BOTH
And makes stinky tuna in the microwave! (laughter)
JESS
Oh God, he was awful, wasn’t he? What was his name? Lou? Lenny?
KAT
Lee. (starts saying something but stops herself) Actually I- Yes, good thing he moved out. (laughs)
JESS
You do know that you’ll have a say on the next flatmate, right?
KAT
I know. But I might get outvoted… Downvoted? You know what I mean.
JESS
I wouldn’t worry about it. (beat) Anyways, what were you saying about Johnno before? That he was looking at you?
KAT
Yeah. I mean, he’s nothing special really but with the luck I’ve been having… You know. It’s nice to be noticed.
JESS
Yeah. It’s just I’ve heard he’s not so nice to his girlfriends.
KAT
(laughing) I’m not going to be his girlfriend (laughs) so, no worries, OK?
JESS
Right. No worries. Wait, do they even say that in New Zealand or is it just Australia? Guess we’ll find out–
(door opens, party noise, fireworks)
JOHNNO
Kat! C’mon! It’s almost midnight!
KAT
Be there in a sec Johnno!
(door closes, party noises abate)
KAT
Maybe I’ll go out and grab that New Year’s kiss. (beat) Don’t worry, ok? It’ll be great.
JESS
OK. Let’s bring in the new year. (toast) Hey, maybe the world *will* end?
KAT
Nah! It’ll be fine. The year 2000 is going to be amazing!
JESS
Let’s go drink to that!
(They laugh. Door opens, party noise. Fireworks! Explosions!)
(OUTRO MUSIC)
Scene 0.2
KARIN
Hi! Karin Heimdahl, creator of Y2K and also voice of Jess here. Thank you so much for listening to our prologue. Episode 1 drops in January and we will have weekly releases throughout 2020. You will hear these wonderful folks:
(MUSIC)
KIRSTY
Kirsty Woolven as Olivia
JANIS
Janis Westin as Kat
KARIN
Karin Heimdahl as Jess
ADAM
Adam Blanford as Johnno
FELICITY
Felicity Boyd as Rachel
ANJALI
Anjali Kunapaneni as Shirin
SHEKENDRA
Shekendra Morgan as Maia
MADDY
Maddy Searle as Claire
ANNA
Anna Jartin as Tammi
LORCAN
Lorcan NicGiollaBhain as Bri
CHARLOTTE
Charlotte Norup as Kirsten
NERYS
Nerys Howell as Emma
KARIN
You can subscribe for free right now in your favorite podcatcher. Please find us on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number 2, and check out our website y2kpod.com for more information. This episode was part of International Podcast Month 2019. Please go to to internationalpodcastmonth.com to find out more about this wonderful celebration of podcasting. We will be back in January. For now, we leave you with the full song “Welcome to the Year 2000!” by Jake Haws, please check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more of his work.
OLIVIA
Thank you for listening, and welcome back when we return to the year 2000.
MANY VOICES
Welcome to the year 2000!… Welcome… Welcome… to the year 2000… to the year 2000… to the year 2000! Welcome to the year 2000!
(OUTRO MUSIC – Welcome to the Year 2000!)
EPISODE 1: JANUARY 1-9, 2000
(Intro music)
Scene 1.1
OLIVIA
Hey, um, I’m Olivia and this is the Y2K podcast! I’m a little nervous, I’ve never done anything like this before. But I guess I should tell you what this is all about… So a few days ago I managed to get my Mum’s old laptop working. I was hoping to find baby pictures of me, there are hardly any and I was just, well, curious. I rummaged around this really old black-and-white dodgy-looking interface and found — absolutely no baby pictures. No pictures at all actually. But I did find something el se. These old audio files, dozens of them, all labeled with dates from January 2000 onwards. It seems to be a conversation in voicemails between my Mum and a friend of hers, and I’ve only listened to a couple of them but they seem… interesting somehow. Though it’s weird to hear Mum so young – I’ll be 20 this year and she would have been about… 25 when this was recorded. Almost the same age. Cool. But so strange. Right I’m rambling. I thought this would make an interesting podcast. So… Here are the first two messages.
Scene 1.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
(library ambience)
JESS
(whispering) Hi Kat! I’m here! And *so* jetlagged. New Zealand sure is a long way away. Sorry about the whispering, I’m at the library computer as I’m still staying in the hostel. Been calling ads for rooms to rent and think I have a few good leads. (muffled footsteps receding, speaks slightly louder) Right, the librarian is out of earshot so I can talk a little louder. Where was I? Yeah. Housing. Auckland is beautiful, it’s summer here and still warm. Flowers everywhere. Really messes with your mind after London winter. One thing I really didn’t grasp before I got here was how incredibly hilly Auckland is – on the map the hostel and the university seem really close together, but in reality there’s an incredibly steep hill between them! Downhill in the morning, thankfully, I couldn’t have coped with the other way around. Anyways, I guess that’ll be an important factor in deciding where to live – whether it’s uphill or downhill from school! Though – come to think of it – I guess I’m not going to be able to afford walking distance so maybe it doesn’t matter. I haven’t quite figured out the buses yet, but they seem fairly straightforward. The flight was very long but uneventful. I got a little sleep on the first leg but on the flight to Auckland I got seated right behind the smoking seats and it was torture. I thought they’d banned smoking on airplanes. Ugh. Sorry. I know you’re a smoker, but you’re a considerate smoker (laughs). Remember that time –
RACHEL
Shh! This is a library you know.
JESS
Sorry! Almost done! (in lower voice) Let me know how you’re doing – what are you auditioning for? Any luck with the day-job-hunting? And are Shirin and Emma pestering you to let some annoying person have my room? Let me know! Love you! Bye!
(Clicks)
Scene 1.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hello Jess! Great to hear your voice! Feels like you are much closer than the other end of the world… London is gray. Or at least Wood Green is gray. (Sighs) I miss you. Emma and Shirin are great but they’re not you. And I miss working with you – even that awful Cinderella disaster — I mean that lovely panto — we did at Christmas. I’ve been auditioning for everything I can find but it’s always the same. You know. They want some really specific British regional accent that I just can’t do. Or perfect RP for that matter. Or else it’s two lines unpaid in something and 300 girls auditioning. (deep sigh) Anyway. I just want to run home to Trollhättan and bury myself in my old bedroom at my mother’s house and eat cheese. (groans) Sorry to be so depressing. (beat) I did find a bartending job, though. You know it’s not my favourite thing but at least it pays the bills, and I really really need that. The only thing is… it’ll mean working for Lee. You know, microwave-tuna-Lee? Stop laughing! He’s OK, really. He gave me a job so I have to think he’s OK, right? It’s five nights a week and the pay is OK. I start tomorrow. Also… I’ve been thinking about Johnno since New Year’s. You know we had that drunken kiss at midnight and it just… hit me, you know? Definite spark. But maybe I’m just so starved in that department that anything will get me going. We will see. OK, what else… Emma and Shirin have called a flatmates’ meeting tomorrow, so I guess I’ll find out then who they have lined up to move in. I know, I know, I’m supposed to have a say but Shirin’s nan does own the flat and I’m just not as good at standing up to them without you. They’re off to the pub in a bit but I said no, I’m just too… something. Not depressed but just down, you know? I’m just going to sit here and… be depressed I guess. (beat) Hang on. You would tell me to go to the pub. In fact, you would drag me there and cheer me up. OK. (laughs) Stop pestering me! I will follow your silent advice. Be right back! (footsteps, door opens, muffled yell) Shirin! Emma! Are you still here?
SHIRIN
(muffled) We’re in my room!
KAT
(muffled) Don’t leave without me!
SHIRIN
(muffled) All right but you’d better get a move on, we’re almost ready!
KAT
(Muffled) OK! (footsteps) Right, sorry Jess! Let me know how everything goes – what’s uni like? Did it start already? Are you meeting any nice people? I miss you! Bye! (clicks)
Scene 1.4
OLIVIA
Right, so that’s it for today. I hope you enjoyed it! I rather like hearing their voices from 20 years ago – before I was even born… Anyway. I’ll put these out weekly for as long as it’s fun I suppose. There are a LOT of these files, I haven’t counted them but I think they go until at least December. So, listeners, of which I as yet have none (laughs) did any of you know my mum or her friend around the year 2000? Do you know anything about the other people they mention? I’d like to get more of the story around these voicemails. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, or find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Our wonderful music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I guess I’ll put a link to that… somewhere. I’m still figuring out this podcasting thing. Right. (reads) Thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(click like something’s turned off but it’s still recording) (lets out a sigh) (mumbles) Too cheesy? Maybe. They might wonder why I don’t just ask my mum but… Well they can wonder. (deep sigh) Hang on, that light’s still on. (click)
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 2: JANUARY 10-16, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 2.1
OLIVIA
(reads) My name’s Olivia and this is the Y2K podcast – welcome to the year 2000! (beat) Yeah. Hey. That’s rather cheerful, isn’t it? Just trying to figure out how to open the podcast. Got any ideas? Answers on a postcard… Hang on, why do people say that? I think my parents say it, so I suppose it’s some old reference. They’re full of those. Anyway, e-mail me if you have any tips… I really don’t know what I’m doing. (laughs) So to recap I’ve found a bunch of files on my Mum’s old laptop, it’s 20-year-old voicemails between my Mum and a friend of hers, and I’m turning them into a podcast. And I’m calling it Y2K because that’s short for the year 2000, when the voicemails were recorded. Yeah. But you probably got that. (laughs) So. I’m back at uni and just had a Sedimentology lecture and it was all right I guess but I was just so tired and unfocused that I couldn’t really grasp what they were saying. Like the information just didn’t reach my brain. (sighs) Sorry. So last week (slight hesitation) Jess had just arrived in Auckland and was whispering in a library, while (slight hesitation) Kat was feeling blue back in London. And here is the second round of audio files from January 2000. They seem to be in completely opposite moods here.
Scene 2.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Jess! Oh I wish I could talk to you directly! Right now! I feel so great! (hums, speaks text) Livin’ La vida Loca… I’m living the ‘loca’ life over here! So, Johnno came to the pub Tuesday night, and he was… He was really cool. It was pretty quiet at the start of the night, and he just ordered a pint and sat there and talked to me when I wasn’t busy. And he’s really smart, you know, I never realized that. We talked about books and politics and theatre – of course we talked about theatre! And music – he’s a huge music nerd and listens to all sorts of stuff I’ve never heard of. We also ended up talking about TV shows, and of course I had to check – and he IS a Buffy fan – maybe even more so than I am! AND he has the first half of season 4 on video and so OF COURSE I invited myself over to watch it. Clever me, huh? So last night I went to his place – he lives in Chalk Farm and he has his own apartment! Haven’t quite figured out how he can afford that… He’s a musician. At least I think so? Yes, he’s in that band, you know? Plays bass? We did NOT talk about our jobs. OK, anyway, we did watch Buffy, like two episodes, you know ‘The Freshman’, and that one with the horrible room-mate – Kathy! – remember how angry we were with her? Anyway, Johnno and I kind of lost interest in TV somewhere around there and… Well it was seriously the best sex I’ve ever had, which is strange, right? But also absolutely amazing. And it wasn’t just sex, we talked. And got hardly any sleep… (serious) I know you’ve heard things about him. But it can’t be right. He’s lovely. And, you know, it’s only been one night – maybe he doesn’t want it to be anything more. Maybe *I* won’t want it to be more. We haven’t promised each other anything. So, no worries, ok?
(00s text noise) Oh! (pause) It’s him. (smiles) He wants to see me tonight! There’s a gig in Brixton – some band I’ve never heard of, but who cares! I have to figure out what to wear. Cross your fingers there’s more amazing sex tonight! (laughs) Love you – bye!
(clicks)
Scene 2.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Sorry! I mean, let me know what’s up with you – met anyone nice at university? And how is it anyway – it started this week, right? OK, really really wish you were here! Bye again!
(clicks)
Scene 2.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
(library ambience)
JESS
Hi Kat. I’m happy you’re so happy. It makes me feel better too. And maybe you’re right about Johnno, maybe it’s all just rumours. But, please, be careful? Have as much sex as you like, but guard your emotions a little. (laughs) I feel like someone in an Austen novel saying that, though of course Lizzie never told Jane to have as much sex as she liked! Maybe she should have, huh? Anyways, remember you’re in that lust-fog now where you feel like you’re in love just because the sex is so good? Don’t trust that feeling! Wait ’til the fog lifts and then figure out what you want to do. All right? And of course congratulations on best sex ever – that’s great. (smiles) No, I’m not jealous. Or bitter. Lonely. Ugh. My dear I’m so happy for you, I’m just having a hard time. Moving to a new country – again – is just exhausting. I did all this when I moved to London five years ago, and it was mostly fun, you know, figuring out where the post office was and what milk to buy and how to get bus passes. I was so happy to be there – and so happy to NOT be in Edmonton – that it didn’t register as a chore. But now, I’m… kind of wondering if I did the right thing coming here. Maybe I didn’t think it through properly. I was just so happy to be accepted, and get the scholarship and everything, and — I was still reeling from the break-up. You know. I do want to do this, and I am sure I will learn a lot, but it’s just so hard. (verge of tears) Damn! I can’t cry in the library! (sniffles, pulls herself together) Yep, still in the library. I move into the new place on Friday. It seems good, the new flatmates are Maia and Tia, and they seem nice enough, just a little stand-offish you know? Like they’re happy to share a flat but don’t really want to hang out. Which is fine, of course, just — And on top of that I’ve now completed two whole days of the *Master of Creative Writing* and talked to exactly no-one apart from the registration person yesterday. (lowers voice) I thought Kiwis were supposed to be friendly, but so far, nope. (normal volume) I know, I know. Give it time. It will get easier. And I can’t give up after two days – I moved all the way to the other end of the world to do this after all. All that ocean between us. That’s actually wonderful here in Auckland – the sea is never far away, and some places are so incredibly beautiful I can hardly believe it. (footsteps approaching, whispers) Crap! Here’s the librarian!
RACHEL
(kindly) You do need to keep it down you know.
JESS
Sorry! Again! I’ll be done in a sec–
RACHEL
What is that anyway, why are you talking to the computer?
JESS
It’s… I just moved here, so my friend and I are doing internet voicemails. To keep in touch. Phone calls to England are really expensive, and —
RACHEL (interrupts)
How clever! Sorry —
JESS (interrupts)
No, I’m sorry —
(They laugh)
JESS
Go ahead.
RACHEL
I forgot what — Oh! Just how clever, to do voice mails on the computer. I’ve never heard of that.
JESS
Yeah, it’s new I think. Pretty handy. (beat) I’m Jess, by the way.
RACHEL
Rachel. Good to meet you. (smiles) So you just moved here? You a student?
JESS
Yep. Creative Writing. Just started, so can’t really tell you anything about it.
RACHEL
(laughs) All right, I won’t ask. Yet anyway. Where are you staying?
JESS
At the hostel down the street right now, but I’m moving into a flatshare in Newmarket this Friday.
RACHEL
Newmarket’s nice, I hope you’ll enjoy — Oh! There’s someone waiting at the desk, I’d better go. Finish this quickly, right?
JESS
All right, thanks! (pause, footsteps retreating) Did you catch all that Kat? I actually talked to someone! And they were nice! I’ll try to take it as a positive sign. There are nice people here – maybe not kindred spirits like you… and Anne Shirley and Diana Barry (laughs) I’m all literary today, maybe some of the creative writing atmosphere is rubbing off on me after all. (laughs) Not that anyone’s mentioned Montgomery yet – or Austen for that matter. (laughs) The professors seem quite good actually. Though lots of work and super fast paced. We will see. So, my kindred spirit, take care of yourself, and don’t jump into anything too fast, right? Sending you hugs across all the oceans – oceans of hugs! (laughs) Let me know how everything goes with Johnno, of course, and everything else. Love you!
(clicks)
Scene 2.5
OLIVIA
Right. That’s – (stops herself) I’m glad she seemed happier toward the end there. But – (shudders) — all that sex talk. Do NOT wish to hear my Mum or her friends on that topic. It’s… just odd. I know they’re around 25 here and sex talk in your 20s is to be expected, but still. I don’t have to like it… Anyway. I’m still wondering if any of you knew my mum or her friend around the year 2000? Or maybe you know anything about the other people they hang out with? I’d like to get more of the story around these voice mails. (reads, still a little uncertain) Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Our wonderful music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. (comments aside from text) I’m doing episode descriptions now, so the link is there. This is Olivia, signing off. (reads, still a little uncertain) Thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 3: JANUARY 17-23, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 3.1
OLIVIA
(full of energy) Hey, this is Olivia and the Y2K podcast – once again I welcome you to the year 2000! But not quite yet (laughs) Today I’ve spent all day outdoors and it was very cold but so so beautiful. (laughs) Most of you probably wouldn’t enjoy looking at rocks for a whole day — outdoors — in January — in England, (laughs) but it really is my idea of bliss. Anyway. Happy you are coming with me on this peculiar trip into the past… Last week Kat was all aglow with lust and excitement and Jess was stressed out and met a librarian. And we’re now at the point where I haven’t actually listened to the voice mails in advance – I thought it would be cool if I listened along with you. So I have no idea what they’re talking about this week. Exciting, right? Let’s do it!
Scene 3.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hi there Kat. Sooo… (sighs) I got a text from Claire saying she’s moving into my old room on Saturday. It’s fine. I’m fine. I guess she just wanted me to hear it from her, which is nice of her. But – I would really have preferred hearing it from you. I know, I know, you have a lot on your mind right now, walking on cloud 9 and all that (smiles) but, you know, it hurts. Damn! Claire and I spent a lot of time in that room when we were together, and it’s… painful… to think of her in there with her new girlfriend. Rose, she’s Rose. And not all that new anymore. (deep breath) And to think of them hanging out with all of you. Also it’s like Shirin and Emma have picked sides now – I thought they were more my friends than Claire’s and I talked so much to them, especially Shirin, you know, after the break-up. Not as much as I talked to you, but, you know. And of course I get that you were steam-rolled into this, and it’s not your fault, I just – I just wish you had told me. Just –
(knock on door)
JESS
Yes?
(door opens)
MAIA
Hey, Jess, I’m out of milk, can I take some of yours?
JESS
Sure, go ahead.
MAIA
Hold on, are you all right?
JESS
Yes.
MAIA
No you’re not. What happened?
JESS
(strained laugh) You don’t want to hear my troubles. I’m fine. Or I will be.
MAIA
(sits down) Sure I want to hear your troubles. We don’t really know each other yet but I can’t let you be this miserable all on your own.
JESS
Right. Thanks. It’s – I just found out that my ex is moving into my old flatshare. Into my room. I lived there for almost four years and we spent a lot of time there together. And I – it’s just hard. It hurts! (starts crying)
MAIA
Oh, I’m so sorry, that’s really rough. (pats Jess on arm) All right, cry if you need to. (pause, JESS cries, MAIA makes comforting noises) Was it recent? The break-up I mean?
JESS
Um… Four months ago?
MAIA
So it’s still quite fresh then. And raw. Did he treat you ok?
JESS
She. Claire. (surprised reaction from MAIA) Yes. And no. She was pretty decent about the actual breaking up with me – as decent as you can be I guess. But… we were supposed to be exclusive and I found out later she’d been cheating on me for at least a year. (near tears) With Rose, who became Claire’s new girlfriend three days after she broke up with me. So that was fun.
MAIA
That’s horrible. And now she’s moving into your old flat?
JESS
Yup. With my old flatmates. It – it feels like they’re choosing sides. Betraying me. (starts crying again) Re- Rep lacing me.
MAIA
I’m so sorry. (pause, Jess cries) But they’re not replacing you, you know. If they are your friends they will stay your friends. Even if they are friends with… Claire, too.
JESS
(collects herself, deep breath) I know. (beat) You’re right.
MAIA
And you know, they say it takes at least a year to fully recover from a break-up. So maybe give yourself some time?
JESS
Yeah. (pause) Thanks for listening, Maia.
MAIA
(smiles) Anytime.
JESS
(beat) Hey Maia – how come you ended up in Auckland? You’re American, right?
MAIA
I am. Lived here since I was 15, so almost an honorary Kiwi at this point. (smiles) My parents moved here for work, my Mom has relatives here. (beat) You going to be all right?
JESS
(shaky smile) I will be.
MAIA
Good. (gets up, stops at door) And hey, Jess?
JESS
Yeah?
MAIA
I’m glad you’re our new flatmate. (beat) Also, I guess Tia and I can stop pretending we sleep in separate rooms now.
JESS
Why– Oh! Right. Yes, you can definitely do that. (laughs) Why would you pretend you weren’t a couple?
MAIA
Homophobes.
JESS
(almost at the same time) Of course, sorry.
MAIA
They’re everywhere, and we really needed a new flatmate to make rent, and soon! So we decided to keep it quiet so we could suss you out a little. (catches herself) Sorry! Didn’t mean to flaunt my happy couplehood in the middle of your ex-crisis.
JESS
That’s ok. Gives me hope, I guess. That there *are* happy couples out there (smiles).
MAIA
OK. Good. I’m going to go text Tia to let her know we are officially outed. You sure you’re going to be all right?
JESS
Yes. Thanks. Don’t forget your milk.
MAIA
Thanks, Jess!
(door closes)
JESS
(back to computer) Hi again Kat. I seem to keep recording conversations with people for you. I- I feel better now. And I feel petty. I know you and Shirin and Emma can be friends with Claire AND me. It’s just — she hurt me so much and I guess I want her to be punished. And being denied your friendship would be a real punishment. Anyways. I’m rambling. As you could tell I’m in the flat now, and I guess I just figured out why Maia and Tia were a little stand-offish (laughs) Maia is so kind. This will be a good place to live. School is still a real challenge both socially and — increasingly — academically. They are so many books to read! So many writing assignments! But at least I’m not bored (smiles). So tell me what’s up with you – still on cloud 9? I miss you. And I love you. Sorry for being a petty grump. Sending oceans of hugs!
(clicks)
Scene 3.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Oh, Jess! I am so sorry! I forgot! I can’t believe I forgot. I’m an idiot. A bad friend. Shit. (deep sigh) I just feel horrible. I really tried to persuade Emma and Shirin to pick someone else, but — majority vote. I know Claire treated you like shit and I won’t be her friend, I promise! I’ll punish her with my non-friendship, so there! (rueful laugh) And you are not a petty grump. You are right. I should have told you. I meant to. But then I started this thing with Johnno and everything else just flew out of my mind I guess. (exasperated sound) I broke the friendship code! Sorry! Sorry sorry sorry! Shit. Hang on. (opens window, lights cigarette, blows out smoke) Smoking calms me down, you know. Johnno doesn’t like it, though, he says — Sorry. Never mind what he says. (inhales) Your new flatmate seems really nice. I’m glad you’ve moved in and that you have started to make yourself at home. I’m a little worried about your workload, though – remember final production at drama school when it got to be too much and you were just frantic and then you kept having panic attacks? Do not let it go that far. Ever again, please. OK? (inhales) Maybe I should recruit that nice flatmate of yours to keep an eye on you, huh? Don’t think I won’t! (Puts out cigarette, closes window) If there are no interesting people at uni maybe you should go back and talk to that librarian, she seemed nice. I miss you! I love you! And oceans of hugs – that’s perfect!
(clicks)
Scene 3.4
OLIVIA
(preoccupied) All right. That was pretty emotional. You know, I thought there would be only my Mum and her friend on these files, but other people seem to creep in as well. I haven’t decided yet if I like that or not. Will let you know. (beat) Anyway, I’ve gotten some e-mails. So I know at least four people are listening! (laughs) They were all about the same thing — which of the two friends is my Mum. A very reasonable question, really. But… I won’t tell you. Sorry about that. I’m not using any last names anywhere, and I want to respect my family’s privacy. I guess there could come a time when something in the recordings reveal some details, but I will deal with that when it comes. So you can speculate all you like but I will say nothing. I’ll just call them (very slight hesitation) Kat and (very slight hesitation) Jess. However I would still be interested to hear from you if you knew them around the year 2000? Or maybe if you know anything about the people around them? (reads, a little more confident) Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. You can also check out our website at y2kpod.com – we have a website! Very exciting! Our beautiful music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. The link is in the episode description. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 4: JANUARY 24-31, 2000
Scene 4.1
(INTRO MUSIC)
OLIVIA
Hey everyone, I’m Olivia and you are listening to the Y2K podcast – welcome to the year 2000! Wait, perhaps I should move that phrase to the end of this intro-thingy-ma-goob? Yes, I will try that. (clears throat) So, what’s up at my end… I’m taking Genetics this term, which is fascinating. I look at my parents, my grandparents, and at myself, and think about what is genes, and what is learned behavior. It’s especially interesting for me as I am only biologically linked with some of my family, yet I feel I have many similarities with all of them. In class we’re mostly studying genetic variation and not really heredity though. Anyway, are you ready for this week’s voice mails from the past? Last week Jess was freaking out over her ex moving into her old room, and Kat apologized for not telling her. All right. Welcome… to the year 2000!
Scene 4.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hi Kat. Thanks. And you don’t need to withhold your friendship from Claire, even though I really appreciate the offer. You’re going to be flatmates — from tomorrow I think — so you need to get on. But, you know, you don’t have to become best friends or anything, right? (laughs) Anyways. I miss you. Maia and Tia are great, and Tia lured me off to pilates the other day which was great — Right, two ‘greats’ in a row… They ARE great. I’m just not feeling so… great, I guess. (laughs) I drag myself to class and back and do the mountains of assignments – so far it’s not really that exciting but I think it will *get* really interesting down the line – but I don’t have energy for much else. (pause) I thought I was mostly over Claire but this has brought back all the old feelings again and I – I – it hurts so much. I don’t want her back but — how can it still hurt so much? How could I have trusted her? For that matter, how can I trust anyone? I can’t even trust my own judgement. (emotional sigh) It’s becoming very clear to me that I wasn’t ready for this. This moving to another country and starting a really challenging degree. That I was running away. (beat) No, that’s not the only truth. I want to do this and I want to immerse myself in creative writing, I want to learn all I can. I like acting a lot but it never really felt like *me* you know? But writing… I can imagine a whole world and make it come alive. I love that. Right. Sorry for being an emotional wreck. I will stick it out. I will make it work somehow. And yes, I will take care of myself. As should you, my dear. And you can tell me all about Johnno, you know. I wanna know. Right. I somehow feel better just talking to you. (smiles) Oceans and oceans of hugs!
(clicks)
Scene 4.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
(worried) Oh Jess. I’m so sorry you are hurting so much. You know, maybe it would be a good idea to find a therapist, just to sort through these feelings? I know you’ve found it helpful before. And yes, I know, expensive, and student budget and so on, but you cannot have less money than you did here, Auckland *has* to be less expensive than London, right? I mean, isn’t everywhere? Well except for places like New York I guess. So no excuses. Maybe your housemates could help you with where to start looking? OK? At least think about it. (pause) Aaaand… you asked about Johnno (laughs) Well, since you asked… It’s going very well. He challenges me, and I need that. He doesn’t let me get away with anything and I like it. You know I risk overpowering guys? Yeah, not him. And he comes up with all these fun things we can do – like yesterday he showed up at work – I was on the afternoon shift so finished at six – with tickets to The Globe that night! It was some obscure Shakespeare play I’d never even heard of, but it was amazing to experience The Globe properly – I hadn’t been yet as it’s a little expensive. Yeah… that’s one thing that is a little uncomfortable. He keeps treating me. He makes quite a lot of money at his day job – turns out he’s an IT-something-or-other – who knew? Anyway I as you know never have any money. I try to treat him sometimes when we’re at less expensive places, but he never seems to realize how even those minor costs create huge holes in my budget. OK, I know what you’re going to say – talk to him about it. And I kind of have, but maybe I need to try again. Hang on — I haven’t told you about our talk last week, have I? I – bravely, points for me! – brought up the where-are-we-heading-conversation. And it went pretty well. We decided we are ‘dating’ in the American sense, but not exclusively. Not that I can imagine being with someone else at this point – nor do I understand how we would have time to ‘date’ anyone as we spend so much time together. So, there we are. Not quite a relationship, but not just sex either. He’s been hurt in relationships before and wants to take it slow, which is fine by me. We —
(Bumps and thuds outside, voices, heavy things being carried)
CLAIRE
(muffled) Shirin! Kat! Emma! Anyone there?
(KAT opens door)
KAT
Hello Claire. Wow – that’s a lot of stuff.
CLAIRE
Yeah, could you give me a hand? Rose went downstairs to get the rest.
KAT
Sure, I just have something to finish up. I’ll be right there.
CLAIRE
Ta!
(Bumps and thuds resume, KAT closes door.)
KAT
Sorry Jess. I thought she wasn’t moving in until tonight. It’ll be OK, you know? It’s not like I’m here much anyway, I’m mostly at Johnno’s. So, take care of yourself. Breathe. Get a therapist. And no worries. All will be fine. OK? Love you!
CLAIRE
(muffled) Kat! Come help me with this desk!!
KAT
(to CLAIRE) Coming! (to JESS) Oceans and oceans of hugs!
(clicks)
Scene 4.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hi again Kat. Wow. That was… weird. Actually hearing Claire move in. Yikes! But also good in a way. It’s done, I heard it, it’s happened. Right. Breathe. (breathes) You’re right. I’m going to talk to Maia and see if they know how to get hold of a therapist. And if not, maybe the student service centre could help. I — I was pretty close to a panic attack yesterday, but managed to breathe through it like that therapist taught me final year. (breathes) Anyways. I’m glad that Johnno makes you happy. Though this whole ‘dating non-exclusively’ thing seems a little… not you. You’ve always been a serial monogamist, or had casual flings where it’s been all about the sex. This seems… different. But I guess it could be a good thing you’re not committing, at least not yet, so you can keep being careful with your emotions. You are being careful, right? Please be careful? I don’t want you getting hurt. But I guess this could be a good way to have a bit of a trial period before deciding if you want to commit to him. Just make sure he is kind, right? If I learned one thing from the horrible break-up with Claire it’s that you need to be with someone who is kind and respects you. She tried to be kind but wasn’t very good at it. Also she really didn’t respect me. She didn’t-
(JESS’ mobile rings, 00s signal)
JESS
(looks at phone, agitated) I’d better get this. I think I was rambling anyway. (nervous laugh) Love you! Bye! (answers phone – beep) Hi-
(clicks)
Scene 4.5
OLIVIA
Oh, I wonder who was calling Jess? Hopefully we’ll find out next week. Anyway, I’m off to study my Genetics notes, we have a tutorial tomorrow. It’s fascinating but complicated, I need to make sure I have a firm grasp of the basics. So, dear listeners, I would still like to hear from you if you knew my mum and her friend around the year 2000? Or maybe if you know anything about their friends? (reads, more confident) Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. You can also check out our website at y2kpod.com. Our tremendous music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. The link is in the episode description. My name’s Olivia, thank you so much for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 5: FEBRUARY 1-6, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 5.1
OLIVIA
Hello listeners, this is Olivia and the Y2K podcast. I’m… hungover. Yeah. Wasn’t going to tell you that but I’m not very good at pretending. (smiles) Anyway I’m sure most of you can relate. I’m not that much of a party person but yesterday after class my friend Tammi dragged me to the pub and we were only going to have one pint, but we got to talking and had another and another and all of a sudden it was like 6 am and we’d been dancing and were very very drunk. It’s always like that when I hang out with her, she’s… magic I guess? (laughs, stops suddenly) Ow! My head. Yeah, I know. Only myself to blame. And Tammi, actually. I blame her! (very quiet laugh) Ouch. Wouldn’t be recording today but I couldn’t fit it in earlier in the week and this is supposed to go out tomorrow so I don’t really have a choice. I’m not about to mess with the podcast release dates. So you’re stuck with this hungover wreck today I’m afraid. (smiles) And that told you I was out all night on a Wednesday, yep, living the glamourous student life out here in Brum… (yawns) All right, let’s get this started so I can grab some painkillers and some more water. Last week Kat wanted to talk to Johnno about money, Claire moved in, and Jess got a mystery phone call. Let’s hope they don’t yell a lot today! (winces, subdued) Welcome to the year 2000.
Scene 5.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Jess! Hello my dear. I can’t help wondering who called you – you don’t usually stop recording for anything… Interfering librarians and nosy flatmates included (laughs). Fill me in on what’s going on, OK? Oh, and did you ever meet that librarian again? She seemed nice. Also I hope you’re feeling better. Claire is all moved in, and it’s pretty strange having her living here. Though she spends some time at Rose’s as well so at least she’s not here all the time. And I’m at Johnno’s quite a lot, so that helps. Emma and Shirin are acting like Claire’s a nice normal person but I just can’t. She was awful to you. Though I realize I do have to get on with her so I’m trying to find that ice-cold-but-cordial mode. Not easy! Sorry. Maybe you don’t want to hear this. Let me know, OK? And I’ll shut up about it. Hang on. (opens window, light early afternoon traffic noise, lights cigarette, inhales smoke, lets it out) Ah… Let’s see, Johnno and I are going to see some band called (tries a few different pronounciations) Queensrike- Queensrush- Queensryche? Anyway, see them at Brixton Academy on Sunday. You know I’m always up for trying new things, but progressive metal? Yeah, I’m a little skeptical. Actually a lot skeptical. (laughs, inhales) Johnno says the lead singer has a really powerful and emotional voice, whatever that means (laughs). But he thinks I will like it, so I’ll give it a go. (hums Genie in a Bottle) Christina Aguilera, now *there’s* a powerful and emotional voice! But it should be fun. (inhales) I’m fairly happy working at the pub, Lee is a pretty chill manager, and the people are friendly but not out to be my new best friends. You know. Nice. Also it’s only moderately popular so it’s never too busy, even on Fridays and Saturdays. (puts out cigarette, closes window) And I’m auditioning, of course, but it feels pretty hopeless. Rejections piling up and, well, it hurts. Especially the theatre ones where I know it’s a long shot but I still have to invest in the play and the character in order to audition. And for a moment I feel as though the part is mine and I think about how wonderful it will be and then – boom – I fall back into reality again. Maybe I should have become an engineer like my mother (laughs) – no! I would hate that! (laughs) – or you know something more sensible where it was possible to get an actual *job*. (beat)What am I saying? I love acting. I want to act. I will act. I just need to convince someone to hire me. Easy-peasy. (beat) Yeah. I was rejected for a Moliére maid today, can you tell? (smiles) I’ll be back to my optimistic self in a day or two. OK, I’m off to work now, take care my dear, and let me know what’s up with you. Love you!
(clicks)
Scene 5.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hi Kat, you always know when something’s off, don’t you? I should have told you who called but I froze. It was Mom. Yeah, I know. My estranged mother. You know I cut my parents off after I came out and they — well, didn’t? Hardest damned thing I’ve ever done. And then London and drama school and you and Claire and I felt like the world was the right way around again. (beat) What I never told you – I didn’t know how – is that Mom reached out to me last year right before final production. She was… civil? And she’s been calling me now and then ever since, chatting, steering clear of all the no-go-zones. And I’ve picked up her calls. I thought maybe we could — I don’t know. Be something to each other — have some sort
of relationship again? I wanted to talk to you about it but it felt so unreal and somehow so delicate, like the slightest draft would disintegrate it. I can’t explain it any better than that. So I’ve talked to her about her gardening and her church friends and my studies, you know, safe things. And it’s been nerve-wracking and difficult but also good. Good to be in some sort of touch again. But the other day I happened to mention that things were a little tough at school and she freaked out and started some weird rant about how I should have stayed in college and in Edmonton. (angry tears) I dropped out five years ago! (beat) I let her rant on for a while but then I made up some excuse and finished the call. Kat, I don’t know what to do. Everything is hard work right now, and I can’t handle this on top of everything else. I think I’ll have to not pick up her calls. At least for a while. (sighs) Oh, but you’d be proud of me, I found a therapist through the university health services – they were incredible. I have an appointment next week, I hope they’re good. Let’s see, what else is going on… Sunday is Waitangi Day here, like the New Zealand national day, but apparently it’s also controversial as many are protesting celebrating a day commemorating a treaty where the Māori people lost their land. Maia and Tia have some Māori friends, and they’ve invited me to join as they visit them for a Hāngī. I’m sure it will be delicious! And the Monday after that is a bank holiday, so I am abandoning my writing assignments and reading for the day and we are heading to the beach! I’ve spent surprisingly little time at the beach since coming here and it’s time to remedy that before fall comes and it’s too cold. Anyways. Have to go write ‘an emotion through the description of a tree’. Yeah, that makes no sense. I’d better go find a really good tree! And.. hug it? (laughs) Good thing I like trees! Love you!
(clicks)
Scene 5.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Jess! (laughs) I love that! An emotion through a tree!! You have to e-mail me what you come up with – I must read this! Are all your assignments like that? Sounds about as cuckoo as drama school! Amazing! (hums “Don’t Sit Under the Apple Tree”) I’m having a great day, Johnno and I slept in and had brunch at this wonderful café and then went to the London Aquarium – you know I love aquariums but I’d never been to this one as it’s silly expensive. Yeah. Guess who paid… (sigh) Anyway it was magical. Such beautiful blue light through the water and colorful fish and scary sharks swimming by and just so… so mesmerizing – Ha! Vocab word! Remember at drama school I was trying to expand my English vocabulary and you found those “weekly vocab” lists? And then you quizzed me every Friday afternoon at the pub? Thank you! Apparently I learnt something! Mesmerizing! Though I still don’t think I’ve ever used ‘bucolic’ or ‘binomial’ in a sentence. (laughs) But I know what they mean! And I know those were both in week ‘B’! Anyway. (more serious) Thank you for telling me about your mother. And I’m so sorry you are hurting. You really didn’t need that on top of everything else. I’m crossing my fingers your new therapist is all right. More than all right – amazing! OK? You don’t need to pick up your mom’s calls if they just stress you out. On the other hand, I get that just her calling will stress you out regardless. Try to relax this week-end, and have fun with Maia on Waitangi Day. I’ll just have to admit that I’d never heard about it before. But I hope it is wonderful, and that you have a lovely day at the beach on Monday! OK, looking out at the grey rain that is London and wish I could teleport over and join you! I have to rush to work – in the freezing sideways rain! Love you! Oceans!
(clicks)
Scene 5.5
OLIVIA
All right, I’m back. Headache is receding slightly but now I’m nauseous. (groans) Better wrap this up. So, Jess’s mum is being horrible and Kat’s been looking at fish. (sigh) I am never drinking again. Ever. Um, so e-mail me if you know anything. About anything. (reads, a little too quickly) You can reach me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Check out our website at y2kpod.com. Our exhilarating music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. The link is in the episode description. My name’s Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000. (relieved) All right, I’m gonna go lie down somewhere…
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 6: FEBRUARY 7-13, 2000
Scene 6.1
(INTRO MUSIC)
OLIVIA
Hello listeners, this is Olivia with the Y2K podcast. Feeling much better this week, thank you for asking. Will go easy on the beer for a while though (laughs). So, next term I am going on an exchange somewhere, to study Geology and Palaeontology at a university overseas, and do lots of exciting field work. Listening to these files makes me really want to go to New Zealand. Maybe it’s that they’ve been talking about summer and beaches and February is unusually dreary here this year, but maybe it’s that it sounds interesting. Beautiful. Challenging. Not that Jess has been very happy there so far. (beat) Anyway. We’re supposed to hand in our preferences next week, and I might just put University of Auckland at the top of my list… We’ll see what happens. Wherever I end up, I hope to continue with this podcast for as long as it’s fun, and there seem to be files available for at least the whole year of2000! What I’m trying to say is I’ll bring my mic and laptop and the podcast will continue. All right? So last week Jess’s mum had been calling from Canada and ranting at her, and Kat was feeling pessimistic about her future as an actor but had a great time at the aquarium. Let’s dive into this week, shall we? Welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 6.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Kat! I wish you *could* have teleported over! I had the most incredible long week-end and somehow getting over Claire and Mom being (beat) her awful self again – feels a little further away. Still hurts like hell but not quite *bleeding* anymore, you know? So we went to see Maia’s and Tia’s friends and had the most wonderful time. We had a really fun, relaxed night. And today we’ve been at the beach in Devonport along with every other city dweller … But it was fine, there was a lot of people but it somehow didn’t feel very crowded, and we splashed and swam and lay around in the shade reading – I realized I hadn’t read an actual novel – well apart from those I read for school – since the flight over here – no wonder I’m not feeling myself! So I picked up a Stephen King – “The Girl Who Loved Tom Gordon” – and it was good. Not his best, but *definitely* not his worst. And King is perfect for a beach read, completely immersive and trilling yet the scary bits are tempered by calming waves and gentle breeze and golden sand. It was so beautiful, Kat. (beat) I’ve decided to not pick up if Mom calls again. At least not for a while. I need to deal with everything else before I – maybe? – deal with her. But today at least I feel ready –
(sound of door being unlocked, opened, in distance)
MAIA (muffled)
Jess? You there?
JESS
In my room!
(knock on Jess’s door)
JESS
Come on in, I’m just-
(door opens)
MAIA
Hey Jess, we’re making ratatouille, you want to join us?
JESS
Hi…
MAIA
Oh, this is my friend –
JESS
(smiles) Rachel, right?
RACHEL
(smiles) And you’re Jess.
MAIA
You know each other?
(Jess and Rachel speak at the same time)
JESS
Not really, we met-
RACHEL
Sort of-
(Rachel and Jess laugh)
RACHEL
Jess came to the library a while back. I had to tell her off for being too loud. (smiles)
MAIA
(laughs) Well I can start on dinner if you two want to… (smiles) I don’t know – talk about books? Make a collage? (laughs, goes to kitchen).
RACHEL
(distracted by Jess) Sure, thanks. (gestures to bed) Can I-
JESS
Sure!
RACHEL
(sits down on bed, rustling, smile) So it was *this* Newmarket flat you were talking about. How did you find it?
JESS
Oh, newspaper listing. I’ve been really lucky, Maia and Tia are great. Have you known them – or Maia – long?
RACHEL
A few years, since Maia started working part-time at the library.
JESS
Right! I’d forgotten they do that. I always just see them knitting enormous yarn with their arms or hand-dyeing fabric or stuff like that, and then –
RACHEL
(interrupts) Then all of a sudden they’ve turned it into incredible art!
JESS
Exactly! Don’t know how they manage to do that every time, but their stuff is so cool.
RACHEL
I don’t know if you noticed the huge blue-green-sparkly thing by the entrance of the library?
JESS
Of course! That one’s incredible. Plus it has Maia all over it. Wow.
RACHEL
(nodding at book) So, what are you reading?
JESS
(hands Rachel book) Stephen King. Just finished it today.
RACHEL
(pages rustle) Any good?
JESS
Pretty good. Not his best, but you know –
RACHEL
Not his worst either?
JESS
(laughs) How did you know I was going to say that?
RACHEL
I’ve read a *lot* of Stephen King. Some of them are- (hesitates)
JESS
Barely readable?
RACHEL
(laughs) Exactly. Haven’t read this one though. Can I borrow it?
JESS
Yeah. I-
MAIA (muffled)
Can you two stop flirting and come give me a hand?
JESS
We weren’t-
RACHEL
(interrupts) Weren’t we? (smiles) Coming?
JESS
Yeah. (remembers) Oh! I just have to finish up my message to Kat. To my friend Kat. In London. Where it’s raining. Probably. (stops herself) I’m babbling.
RACHEL
You are. Kind of dadaist (beat) but I like it. (smiles) Thanks for the book. I’ll go help Maia. See you in the kitchen. (leaves with book)
JESS
Yeah. See you… (sits down, to Kat) Hey Kat. That was Rachel. Again. She’s- She’s- Wow. Yeah. She just showed up in my room. Well you heard that. And she’s wonderful. Right. I have to go. Let me know what’s up with you – love you! Oceans of hugs!
(clicks)
Scene 6.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hey Jess, so glad you had a good week-end! I almost felt like I was there with you! And I can’t believe Rachel is friends with Maia. So… flirting, huh? (laughs) I get that you have other things going on, but there was some definite chemistry there. Anyway. I keep asking you about uni and you keep not saying much, apart from it’s a lot. So how is it really? Assignments, professors, fellow students? Is it all day every day lectures or seminars or – I don’t know – feedback sessions or group assignments… Or is it more you completing a ton of writing assignments on your own? See? I have no clue. Also you have to send me a picture of your room once you feel like you’ve made it yours. What does your neighborhood look like? What do you see when you look out of your window? You know exactly what *I’m* looking at after all… Same old Wood Green. (sighs) Johnno’s on a business trip this week. In Florida, lucky bastard. I miss him. So much. In such a short time he’s become really important to me. To the point where I don’t like sleeping alone, and I put off going to bed so I don’t have to. Last night I got home from work at midnight and had this idea for new earrings, so I started bending wire and fiddling with beads and then all of a sudden it was 4 in the morning… Yeah, not good for my sleep! But it was so much fun, and I haven’t had time to make anything for a while… Anyway, he needs to come home so I get more sleep! Not very romantic perhaps, but I’ve always been more pragmatic… Johnno’s pretty damned romantic, though. He keeps hinting at something he’s planning for Valentine’s day next week, but he won’t tell me what. (smiles) So that should be fun. What else? Claire hasn’t re-painted your room yet, I think she likes the grey. You know she- Never mind. Also I got my hair cut by some student at Toni & Guy, so it only cost 5 pounds. But I had very little say in what they did, so now I have trendy-ish asymmetrical hair. It’s not what I would have chosen, but it’s kind of cool. She wanted to dye the roots dark too, which I thought was a funny idea. Anyway her instructor said no, and she just did highlights. Very relieved at that, you know how I hate when my hair grows out blonde under a darker color and it just looks like I’m bald? Yeah, saved by the bell I guess! OK, I should finish this up. Let me know what your therapy appointment was like. And take care of yourself. OK? Love you! Bye!
(clicks)
Scene 6.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hi Kat, so… I saw my therapist today. It was a guy, which was a little weird. I’ve only had female therapists before. But I decided to give him a chance and told him about Claire, and Mom, and coming here, and feeling out of place. All the stuff. And he was pretty good. I mean, there was a *lot* for him to take in all at once, and he made lots of notes, but he listened, and the responses he gave me made sense, and I feel like I can talk to him, so, yeah. Pretty good overall. I’m seeing him again in three weeks. Things are better, but they’re not great. I guess I haven’t been talking about school because I don’t know what to say. It’s pretty good, but… I expected it to be incredible. So, yeah. (beat) Anyways. We usually have lectures and/or seminars every weekday morning. Most of them are interesting, some are very very boring. We have this one professor who cannot structure the discussions, which means the – few! – wackos in my discussion group completely take over, and bring up their own specific hobbyhorses which have little or nothing to do with what we’re actually supposed to be talking about. Drives me up the wall. He’s a great lecturer, and seems very nice, but he’s so useless at structure. He gave us the ‘emotion through a tree’-assignment, which was weird but interesting – I will e-mail it to you, have to remember – and when half of us had handed it in he told the other half they needn’t bother as one or two had objected to the assignment. So why give it out in the first place?? Yeah. Then in the afternoons we have feedback sessions in groups, and also individually once a week, and time to read and write. It’s actually ´-
(JESS’ mobile rings, 00s signal)
JESS
Better not be Mom- (looks at phone, surprised) Oh! It’s Bri, I have to get this – I’ll get back to you! So sorry to do this again! (answers phone – beep) Hi Bri!
(clicks)
Scene 6.5
OLIVIA
Aaaall right… Who is Bri? Maybe we’ll find out next week! I got an e-mail from someone named Cassandra in Wellington, she says she lived in Auckland twenty years ago and might have known Jess, but she’s not sure – she says there were a lot of Jess’ and Jessicas around the university at that time. She’s going to follow the podcast to see if she picks up any other clues. Thank you, Cassandra! So, please check out our webpage y2kpod.com, you can go there for more info, and, of course, to listen to episodes. We are also on Apple Podcasts (what used to be iTunes), Google Podcasts, Spotify and most other podcatchers. Isn’t that a great word – podcatcher! Like you stick it up in the air and it catches random podcasts for you! I learned that today listening to the Oz 9 podcast. It is so funny! It’s about a doomed spaceship – the Oz 9 – with a completely useless but hilarious crew. You should listen, they could make anyone laugh! Also their AI’s named Olivia, which is just… a really great name (laughs). So… If anyone – like Cassandra – thinks you might have known Kat or Jess or their friends around the year 2000 I would be very interested to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Our amazing music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. The link is in the episode description. I’m Olivia, (reads) thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 7: FEBRUARY 14-20, 2000
CONTENT WARNING
OLIVIA
Hey everyone, Olivia here. After listening to today’s voice mails I feel I need to put some kind of warning here. This episode contains descriptions of a suicide attempt, as well as descriptions of homophobia and transphobia. Please take care of yourself, and if you need to, don’t be afraid to reach out and ask for help.
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 7.1
OLIVIA
Hello, my name is Olivia and this is the Y2K podcast. (beat) How are you today, listeners? I’m fine, a bit of a cold, pouring rain so not much fun outdoors… So yeah. February in Birmingham! A bit grey and dull really. I hope you are somewhere nicer – I saw the other day that I have a listener in Singapore, which is just… WILD. And great – thank you so much for listening! Either way, I am sure it’s warmer there – but maybe it’s monsoon season? Let me check (grabs her phone to google) Blimey, it rains more than here! But, yes, warm. And humid! All right, suddenly not so jealous of your weather, listener in Singapore! But I bet Singapore is brilliant in any weather! All right, let’s get to the story, shall we? Last week Jess had a great week-end and talked to someone named Bri, and Kat missed Johnno and got a haircut. Today I hope we find out who Bri is! Welcome… to the year 2000!
Scene 7.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hello Jess – Happy Valentine’s Day! In Swedish it’s “All Hearts Day” which I love – gets me thinking about *all* the people I love and not just one romantic partner. And so of course I want to check in with you! So… haven’t heard from you for (jokingly) *four whole days*. What’s up? Anything going on with Bri and your family? Your mother bugging Bri this time? You OK? It’s not like you were dancing around like Julie Andrews in the hills of Austria last I heard from you… (hums “The Hills Are Alive”) So let me know, OK? Let’s see… I just auditioned for a toothpaste commercial, have no clue why – yes I do, it’s paid work. And at least toothpaste is something I actually use – remember that weird viagra thing we auditioned for last year? So very happy neither of us got that one! What were we thinking? And it was everywhere – still is I think – and the girl who got it didn’t want to go out for months. (laughs) Or so her flatmate told me, anyway. Poor thing. (beat) Still haven’t talked to Johnno about the money-thing. Everything else is good and I don’t want to rock the- wait, what is that saying? Rock the… cradle? No, bridge? Boat? No, doesn’t sound right. You know what I mean. But, yeah, I’m falling for him. How could I not? He’s smart and cute and fun and takes care of me and… I like him. And he doesn’t let me get away with stuff, you know? I need that. Remember my wimp of an ex? Don’t want to deal with that again. (beat) Work is OK. I’ve gotten some afternoon shifts lately which is much quieter. It’s nice in a way, but also a little dull. I –
(Door opens)
JOHNNO
Kat! (sees her, happy) You’re here! (gives KAT a big kiss) Miss me?
KAT
(befuddled but pleased) Johnno! Yeah, but… I thought we were meeting at seven?
JOHNNO
I just missed you . (kisses the top of her head) And… Surprise! I have tickets to see The Hives at six! Happy Valentine’s Day!
KAT
(still taken aback, but happy) Wow. Thank you! That’s great. (smiles) Though I’ve never heard of them.
JOHNNO
(laughs) They’re Swedish, I thought you’d know all about them!
KAT
Really? (laughs) Nope! (beat) Um, I was going to- never mind. (beat) Oh, but I only got you this silly little thing, I should have –
JOHNNO
(interrupts) That’s OK sweetheart, you can buy dinner! (kisses KAT)
KAT
OK. Right. (beat) When do we have to leave?
JOHNNO
(looks at watch) Half an hour? It’s at the Astoria. (beat) Hold on, what did you do to your hair?
KAT
Oh yeah, I had a haircut. Toni & Guy. What do you think? (twirls)
JOHNNO
(thinks) Hm. I liked you with longer hair. And… (takes a closer look) It’s lopsided?
KAT
(taken aback) It’s supposed to be asymmetrical.
JOHNNO
All right. (laughs) Never mind. It’ll grow out. (hugs KAT again, nuzzles her neck) So what should we do now?
KAT
(a little happier, slowly) Well… (remembers) Oh! I was in the middle of leaving a voice mail for Jess, let me just finish up.
JOHNNO
All right then. (kisses KAT, to computer) Hi Jess! Hope everything’s good in New Zealand! (to KAT) I’ll just grab a magazine and wait for you. (rustle of magazine, quick peck for KAT, settles down on KAT’s bed)
KAT
OK. (to computer, clearly uncomfortable that Johnno stayed in the room) Um, hi again Jess. So, that was Johnno. But you heard that. Yeah. Where was I? Oh. Update. I didn’t get the Ayckborn play, did I even tell you I auditioned for it? (JOHNNO’s magazine pages rustling) They called me back, but I found out yesterday they’d cast someone else. It wasn’t a huge part, but it was some pay and I like Ayckborn. Also a small tour which would have been fun.
JOHNNO
(from behind his magazine, slightly muffled, distracted) But I would have missed you, sweetheart.
KAT
(pleased at the sentiment but annoyed at the interruption) Yeah. But it was only a week, I think we could have managed a week. (nervous laugh, back to JESS) I think that’s it. Take care of yourself, and let me know what’s up with Bri and… everyone. Also, remember to e-mail me that thing we talked about.
JOHNNO
(from behind his magazine, slightly muffled, distracted) Sounds like you’re talking in code, sweetie, just pretend I’m not here.
KAT
(annoyed but tries not to show it) OK. (beat) Love you, Jess, hope to hear from you soon. B-
JOHNNO
(sits up, lays down magazine) You tell your friends you love them?
KAT
Yeah. Well mainly Jess, we’ve been friends a long time. (beat) And I do love my friends, why shouldn’t I tell them?
JOHNNO
It sounds so… American.
KAT
Jess is Canadian. (beat) I guess technically that’s on the American continent. North American continent. The American continents? Anyway. You say that like it’s bad.
JOHNNO
No, no I guess not. (pause) You’ve never said it to me.
KAT
And you’ve never said it to me.
JOHNNO
I… I’ve told girls I loved them before. And they’ve hurt me. So I suppose I’m careful with it now.
KAT
(slowly) O–K
JOHNNO
And we’re not there.
KAT
I guess we’re not, no.
JOHNNO
(hugs and kisses KAT) You’re my sweetheart! Isn’t that enough?
KAT
Of course.
JOHNNO
(looks at watch) We have to run – are you ready?
KAT
OK, just let me get my things. (noise of grabbing purse, jacket)
JOHNNO
Let’s be off!
(door opens and closes, footsteps. Pause. Running feet, door thrown open)
JOHNNO
(muffled) Get a move on!
KAT
Sorry! Bye Jess!
(clicks)
Scene 7.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hi Kat, sorry about the radio silence… And for hanging up on you, twice. Ugh. Sorry again. Bri was really upset. And so far away. I was inches from calling the emergency services in Edmonton from the landline and get them to send an ambulance over. But in the end I didn’t, just kept her talking. Down from the ledge as it were. Literally. Bri had the sleeping pills on hand. Kat, it was so scary!! (swallows, pause) My wonderful parents have done it again. To Bri this time. I am so fucking angry! Furious doesn’t even begin to cover it. Bri and I have been e-mailing since I left – neither of us can really afford the phone calls – but you know it’s been occasional, we’re both busy, and she’s graduating college this year – or was supposed to — OK I’m stalling. (beat) Bri finally came out to our parents as transgender. Which they should have figured out years ago, but they are not exactly perceptive… And they took it, well, not at all really. They closed off and asked Bri to leave and not come back. Perfect parents, right? God I hate them. (yells) I HATE MY PARENTS. (pause) So Bri is coming here. I booked hi- fuck! her a plane ticket on my credit card – have to deal with that one later – and am going to meet her at the airport in a few hours. Bri’s roommate helped pack and made sure she got on the plane. And Maia and Tia have agreed to let her stay here for a while – they even cleared out their study so Bri can stay there. They really are the best flatmates ever. Thank God for them. Or – I don’t believe in God. At least not my parents’ awful patriarch with a big beard and even bigger prejudices. Ugh! Wish you were here, Kat. I need someone to hold my hand through all of this. Bri is in really bad shape and I’m not sure we know each other that well anymore. Haven’t seen her for over five years and we’ve only talked on the phone like once a year. But I love Bri. And I will protect her and support her with everything I’ve got. (long pause) So that’s my news… Oh, and school is tough still but starting to get really interesting. Also I’ve finally started making some acquaintances – we started some group assignments and it seems everyone else in my group were as freaked out by the workload as I was and didn’t really talk to anyone else either. Anyways. (beat) That was an… interesting conversation you and Johnno had. How do you feel about that? The ‘love’ thing? And — sorry about the Ayckbourn play. You would have been great, and they’re silly not to see it. So there. Right, I’m gonna finish up here – have to grab lunch before I get Bri. I MISS you! I love you! Oceans of hugs!
(clicks)
Scene 7.4
OLIVIA
All right. So now we know who Bri is. I – (stops herself) I wonder if Bri turns up somewhere. Her voice I mean. I suppose we will find out. (looks outside) I think I will finish this now and defy the rain and go running – I always feel better after a good run. (lightly) It’s not like I’m going to celebrate Valentine’s Day – it’s a silly meaningless capitalist construct. (slight laugh, cheerfully) Also there is zero romance in my life, and that’s the way I like it. I have other things to occupy my time. So, listeners, check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info, and, of course, listen to episodes. We are also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you think you may have known Kat or Jess or their friends twenty years ago I would be super interested to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Our fantastic music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. The link is in the episode description. My name’s Olivia, (reads) thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 8: FEBRUARY 21-29, 2000
CONTENT WARNING
OLIVIA
Olivia here again. So another warning this week. My friend Tammi told me it’s called a content warning or trigger warning. Makes sense. Anyway. This time for homophobia, transphobia and verbal and emotional abuse. Please take care of yourself, and if you need to, don’t be afraid to reach out and ask for help.
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 8.1
OLIVIA
My name is Olivia, and you are listening to the Y2K podcast. How are you today, listeners? I do know there are a few of you now, which is exciting! Thank you, and thank you especially to those writing in – I will do an episode at some point where I try and answer some of your questions. So tonight I’m recording at the uni radio station studio – a friend of mine convinced them to let me use it and it is so much better than recording under a blanket in my room! Thanks Tammi! And thank you BurnFM! Though it’s quite late as it was the only time it wasn’t in use, and it’s a little spooky here in the basement… Never mind. Let’s head into today’s voice mails – there are a few more than usual today, though they are shorter. Last week Jess talked Bri down from a ledge, and Kat got a Valentine’s surprise from Johnno. Once again – welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 8.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Oh Jess, just heard your latest, this is just a quick message before work – I am so so sorry your parents are being such absolute jerks. Give Bri a big hug from me – I know we’ve never met but I feel like I know her from all you’ve told me. And a big hug to you as well – don’t forget to take care of yourself in the middle of all this, OK? I’ll record a proper message soon – love you! Bye!
(clicks)
Scene 8.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Thanks Kat! I love you! (beat) Everything is fairly stable now. Bri is here, the flight went well, and we’ve talked and talked and talked. Seems our parents never ever mentioned me to Bri, and when Bri said something – you know a general comment like “So I heard Jess is playing Gertrude in Hamlet this semester” they just ignored it. Actual example. I don’t get it. Must take so much energy for them. But I guess now they have no kids. I wonder what they’ll say to their friends. Anyways. Doesn’t matter. I’ll get back to you soon with more – love you!
(clicks)
Scene 8.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hi Jess! So glad things are stable. And I get that you and Bri have a LOT of talking to do. Five years of talking, right? But make sure you get sleep and food and that you get some time to yourself as well please? I know it’s not easy when Bri is having a crisis but you won’t be much help if you don’t take care of yourself too. OK? And I know this is so easy to say and so much harder to do, but just do it. For Bri if not for yourself, OK? OK! (pause) And don’t feel like you have to get back to me with a huge long message, or at all for a while. Of course I want updates, and I’m always here to listen, but I don’t want to add myself to your already mile-long to-do-list. (snort) Muddled metaphor, I know, but you know what I mean. All is ok here, so no worries. Okidoki? Love you! Oceans of hugs!
(clicks)
Scene 8.5
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Kat. I just talked to Mom. It was – She – (starts crying, but gets it under control) I wouldn’t have picked up, but I was asleep and confused. It’s 4 am here. She — she yelled at me. About Bri and – somehow it was all my fault. I couldn’t get a word in. So I just – sat here. And then she said this was God’s punishment on her for reaching out to me. (beat) And that she’d told her friends at church today that – that – that I was dead.(sobs quietly) There’s something wrong with her. I see that. But it hurts so much. I was going to hang up on her but she beat me to it. And now – Bri’s asleep, of course, and I don’t know if I should tell her about this. It’s hard, Bri is in such a fragile place yet she is so strong. And so open and trusting despite all the garbage our parents have done. Yeah. I’ll tell her. Enough secrets. But first I’ll try to sleep some more. Always a relief to talk to you my dear. Thank you for being there. Love you!
(clicks)
Scene 8.6
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Good morning Kat! TGI Saturday – I slept late and feel better. Got my coffee and chocolate croissant… Yes a chocolate croissant is breakfast, Kat! More breakfasty than those stinky cheese sandwiches you eat! Anyways. (takes a bite) Just wanted to leave a message that’s a little more zen than the last, um, five or so? I will be ok, and Bri will be ok, we will make our own family, and it will be wonderful. So there. (sips coffee) If Bri gets up in the next hour or so I’m gonna suggest we go do something – we’ve been holed up talking since she arrived – we really needed to – but now I think it’s time to get outdoors and grab some fresh air. Maybe a hike? Might be easier to tell Bri about Mom’s latest horror surrounded by trees… I’ve heard there are some great trails around here. I’ll ask Maia and Tia, they’re bound to know. (sips coffee) So what are you up to, Kat? I feel like my crises have overshadowed everything lately. Things good at work? Johnno and you still happily dating non-exclusively? Any new auditions coming up? You know when I’m a famous playwright I’m going to write you the most incredible part, right? And we will make a smash-hit West End show together! (smiles through tears) Yay! I love you! Oceans of hugs!
(clicks)
Scene 8.7
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Oh, Jess! So happy you are feeling a little better! And I hope you and Bri do end up going hiking – take lots of pictures, I’m sure it’s beautiful! I always find it easier to talk about difficult stuff while walking. Remember all those walks we took around Wood Green when we were freaking out about final production last year? Don’t know if I would have graduated without those. (takes sip of coffee) Would you believe I’m also having Saturday breakfast – though it’s about 13 hours later than yours (smiles). Time difference is strange! No stinky cheese today though, just had an egg sandwich (laughs). Which can be a little stinky too, I suppose… And coffee, always lots of coffee! (takes another sip) I’m at Johnno’s, he’s still asleep, so I’m borrowing his computer to send this. We’re doing really well – he actually asked me to be his girlfriend last night! (squeals) We’d been out with some friends of his – I was a little nervous but they were nice! Anyway just as we’d walked in the front door he grabbed me and pushed me up against the wall in the hallway and kissed me, and then he looked into my eyes and just (beat) asked. No-one’s ever asked me to be their girlfriend before. It felt tender and sexy and serious all at the same time. I said yes of course! (giggles) So we are now officially a couple and I couldn’t be happier. Lately I’ve been here almost every day – and night. So haven’t really seen much of (beat) Claire – or Shirin and Emma for that matter. Maybe I’ll stay at the flat tonight – have to do some laundry – I’m forever carrying underwear and t-shirts around and never get around to washing them. Anyway. Still haven’t –
(steps approaching)
JOHNNO
(sleepy, hugs KAT) Good morning sweetheart!
(JOHNNO nuzzles KAT’s neck, KAT squeals. They kiss.)
KAT
(happy) Good morning my love.
JOHNNO
(lets her go, steps away) Told you I don’t – I don’t want to use that word. (disdainful) Love. (mumbles) I’ve used it before.
KAT
(crushed) Oh. OK. Sorry. (pause)
JOHNNO
That’s all right, I forgive you sweetheart! (kisses her passionately) Is there coffee?
KAT
(flustered) No, sorry – Um, you’re not usually up this early. I can make–
JOHNNO
(interrupts) All right, you can’t fit everything into that sweet head of yours. You focus on being gorgeous, I’ll make coffee. (laughs) What were you up to anyway, reading all my e-mails?
KAT
No, of course not! I-
JOHNNO
(interrupts again) Joking! Can’t you take a joke sweetie? (laughs, kisses KAT again and leaves)
KAT
I- (sighs) Never mind. I was leaving a voicemail for Jess. (sighs again, sits down) Sorry Jess. I don’t know what I was talking about. Take care of yourself, and of Bri. I’ll call again soon.
JOHNNO
(yells from kitchen) I’m making pancakes – come have some!
KAT
(to JOHNNO) Coming! (to JESS) Bye!
(clicks)
Scene 8.8
OLIVIA
I- I- all right. That was a lot. Yeah. Heavy stuff. It’s funny, I get worried about what’s going to happen next, but it was twenty years ago – it’s already happened! And yet I know so little about it. Which is why if you know anything about Jess or Kat or their friends during this time I would like to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info, and, of course, listen to all our episodes. We are also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – on Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K podcast, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you have a minute, it would mean so much if you would rate and review us on Apple Podcasts. It can help others find the show, also it just makes me happy (smiles). Our awe-inspiring music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. The link is in the episode description. My name’s Olivia, (reads) thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 9: MARCH 1-5, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 9.1
OLIVIA
Hello everyone, welcome to the Y2K podcast! My name is Olivia, and I will be your tour guide as we time travel twenty years back in time. (laughs) All right, yeah, I am still working on that intro… I’m at the BurnFM studio again today, feeling a little less lost among all the tech in here. Thanks again, Tammi! So guess what I found yesterday? The website for the Free Online Voicemail service that Kat and Jess were using twenty years ago. It looked completely ridiculous – but I did some googling, and apparently websites in the nineties and early noughties all looked like that. I guess no-one ever bothered to take it down. Not sure if you could still record a voicemail on there, but their profiles were still searchable, which is a little creepy. I guess nothing really disappears once it’s been online. Like an old footprint – a fossil if you like. Two friends left fossils twenty years ago and now I’m digging them up, sorting them and sending them off in the world for all to… admire? Enjoy? Share? Something. All right, let’s get to it. Last week Jess’s mother reached new lows of horrible, and the ladies had breakfast in different time zones, and Johnno was odd about the word love again. Welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 9.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hi Jess. (slight rustling of clothes) I’m folding laundry. I keep putting laundry off because it is just *so* BORING… Also I’m hardly ever home. But now I’m down to wearing my workout gear, so today is laundry day – yay! (smiles). I’m staying here tonight too, Johnno has a work thing. We hardly ever stay here together, because – duh! – he has his own place with no sneaky flatmates. Speaking of flatmates, um, not sure if you want to know this but (beat) I think Rose broke up with Claire. I don’t know what it was about, but Claire seems to be in a really bad mood, and I haven’t seen Rose over here in a while. Talked to Emma about it in the kitchen this morning, and she thinks so too, but we’re both too chicken to ask… Anyway. That’s the laundry folded (puts laundry away in dresser) I have another load in the machine but that won’t be done for a while yet… Hang on. (opens window, light Sunday morning street noise, lights cigarette, blows out smoke, sighs) I tried to talk to Johnno about money last night. We’d been to dinner with his friends in Soho and had lovely Chinese food and when we got the bill Johnno just said “Let’s just split it in six parts!” like it was no big deal. I had ordered one dish and had one beer, because that was all I knew I had money for. The others – (inhales-exhales smoke) there were six of us, but you got that – had all had multiple dishes and many pints each. And when I told Johnno – in a low voice so the others wouldn’t hear – that I didn’t have money for that, and that I wanted to just pay for what I’d had, he says really loudly “Well, at least you’re gorgeous! Don’t worry, it’ll be my treat!”. I felt about five millimeters tall. I didn’t want to advertise my financial status to all his well-off friends with steady jobs and cars and apartments. It made me feel like a failure, this poor little out-of-work actor who gets by on bartending. So when we got home – to his place I mean – I brought it up. And he… Just doesn’t seem to get it. He says I can pay for ‘other things’ but the fact that he has money means we do much more expensive things, so even if he treats me a lot of the time – which is of course lovely of him – it doesn’t mean I can always pay for the other expensive things that I wouldn’t be doing if I wasn’t with him. You know? (inhales-exhales smoke) Last week I walked from his apartment in Chalk farm to work in Finsbury Park almost every day to save on bus fare. (puts out cigarette, closes window) Turns out it’s nearly an hour’s walk each way so it took a lot of time.
(washing machine subtly starts spin cycle, increases during following)
KAT (continues)
Haven’t told him this. I feel… I feel ashamed to not have money. Which is ridiculous. Why is it shameful? I guess I didn’t feel quite as bad about it when we were students. Now I’m supposed to be an adult, a graduate who supports herself. Yeah. Not going so well. Anyway, Johnno and I argued. For the first time, really. He just wouldn’t see that I had a point, that my frustration was real. He kept trying to reassure me he would take care of me and I kept trying to tell him that wasn’t the poi nt. We were yelling. You know me. I don’t yell. It was freaky. We made up in the morning but- the issue is still there and I don’t know what-
(spin cycle at noisiest)
CLAIRE
(muffled yell) Who the fuck is doing laundry at this hour?
(KAT opens door)
KAT
Hey Claire. Sorry. Guilty. It’s almost do-
CLAIRE
(interrupts, furious) What the hell were you thinking? I was asleep!
KAT
(tries to remain calm) Well it’s almost noon, so-
CLAIRE
(interrupts) I was asleep!
KAT
(still trying to keep calm) I get that. Are- Are you OK?
CLAIRE
No! I’m not fucking OK! (storms off)
KAT
O–K. (mutters under breath) Jävla subba. (washing machine starts winding down, KAT closes door, sits down)(to JESS, near tears) Jess. That was really unpleasant. I hate getting yelled at. And there was no reason – there’s no rule about doing laundry in daytime. Well, you know all this. (small sob) Hate this! I start crying instead of getting angry. (exasperated) (sighs) I’d better go take care of that laundry now. Anyway, confirmed: Claire is *not* in a good place. Wow! (beat) So… (pulls herself together) let me know all about your hike, and how Bri is, and how you are, and everything else that’s going on. OK? Love you!
(clicks)
Scene 9.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hey Kat, so sorry you got yelled at, first by Johnno and then by Claire. She seems a little… unhinged. It’s weird, now that Bri’s here and everything I feel (beat) distanced from the pain of that break-up. Like the new pain of Bri and I basically being (beat) orphans ate up some of the old pain. (pause) Also, with Bri here I feel like I belong more, you know? Like she’s making this feel like home just by being here. It’s a little too early to say for sure, but Bri’s talking about possibly staying in Auckland, trying to get transferred to university here and finishing her degree. It won’t be until the spring semester though – which starts in August, very confusing! – so she’d have to get a job in the meantime. I hope she does stay! This past week has been so full of pain and misery yet it’s also been wonderful to connect with Bri again. We had the most incredible hike through unbelievable scenery, I took lots of pictures, I’ll have to get them double printed and send you some! And we talked and talked some more, and I told her about Mom, and it was awful but Bri said she’d rather know than not. So we’ve decided not to pick up Mom’s calls, either of us. Or Dad’s, but he’s not usually one for calling. (pause) I had my second therapy appointment today, with Antonio, which somehow seems a far too beautiful name for somebody as prosaic as a therapist. But I like him. He listens and thinks and lets me finish my rambling thoughts, and then he offers up a question or a comment that gets me thinking further. It’s still early days, but I think it’s helping… Let’s see. School is getting more fun – still breakneck-paced but we’re doing feedback sessions in groups which is very useful but also terrifying. One thing this degree is definitely teaching me is to not be so precious about my writing – I can’t double- and triple-check everything before letting anyone read it, I just have to get writing, and then pass it along for feedback. (very soft sound of front door opening in background) It’s taking some getting used to, but it seems to also unlock me creatively somehow, I don’t get in my own way as much, if you know what I mean. Yesterday I–
(slight footsteps, soft knock on door)
RACHEL
Jess? You there?
JESS
(gets up and opens door) Yeah. (smiles) Hi! Rachel!
RACHEL
(laughs) Hi. So Maia invited me over for dinner again – you want to help us make dumplings?
JESS
Um, sure! I’ll check if Bri wants to join in as well.
RACHEL
Cool, more the merrier, right?
JESS
(laughs)I just have to finish-
RACHEL
(interrupts with a smile) You voicemailing your friend again?
JESS
Yep. But I was just going to wrap it up, so-
RACHEL
OK. (smiles) See you in a bit then.
JESS
(closes door, smiles) Yeah. (to KAT) So, dumplings! Never made those before. You would know – is it hard? (laughs) You know I’m a little lost when it comes to cooking… Or a lot lost… Anyways, I’m sure it will be fun. Take care of yourself, my dear. Any exciting auditions lined up? Love you!
(clicks)
Scene 9.4
OLIVIA
So, seems things are looking a little better at Jess’s end. I’m a concerned for Kat though – all that yelling… Um, we will see what happens… Or what happened, really. Sort of feels like it’s happening now… Is it just me or do you feel that way too listeners? Either way, did you know Kat or Jess or their friends around the year 2000? I would like to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, and that’s the number two. Also check out our beautiful webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info about the show and, of course, listen to all our episodes. We are also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – on Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you have a minute, it would mean so much if you would rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. Our jaw-dropping music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. The link is in the episode description. My name’s Olivia, (reads) thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 10: MARCH 6-12, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 10.1
OLIVIA
Good evening, (beat) here is the 9 o’clock news… (laughs) No! Just messing about. Couldn’t stop myself once I’d started with ‘good evening’ – why did I say that? (laughs, deep breath, tries to be serious) If you haven’t figured it out yet. I’m Olivia, being silly, and this is the Y2K podcast. (giggle) Tammi and I were winding each other up before we started recording and I guess I just can’t stop! Tammi’s agreed to stay in the studio with me today, so I don’t have to feel creeped out all alone in this basement. Say hi, Tammi!
TAMMI
(distant) Hello! (laugh)
OLIVIA
Hello! Of course Tammi’s only here to show you that I do have friends and am not a complete loner. All right? (laughs) Someone wrote in and said I seemed so lonely and I should find some nice ‘chums’. And someone else said I should get a boyfriend. (snorts) Not happening. But, yeah. I *have* nice ‘chums’ so don’t worry about me. But I like being alone too. Nothing wrong with that. In fact, pretty damned healthy if you ask me. Anyway. Last week Kat got yelled at, and Jess was going to make dumplings with (beat) Rachel. Let’s see what this week brings. (to TAMMI) Do you want to say it with me, Tammi?
TAMMI
(distant) OK!
BOTH
Welcome – to the year 2000!
Scene 10.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Kat! Everything OK? Just haven’t heard from you in a little longer than usual… So… I had a great time the other night with Maia, and Bri, and Tia, and… Rachel. It felt so right to make food together and eat it. Um, yeah. That’s what you usually do with food. (laughs) I guess what I mean is that it felt normal and home-like and… comfortable. With everything that’s been happening I really need that, and I think Bri does too. I was a disaster at dumplings, though. It’s fiddly and you have to pleat them just so. Well, you probably know, oh you of incredible cooking skills! Does Johnno appreciate your cooking properly? He’d better – I *miss* it! Anyways, I just couldn’t get the pleats to stay pleated… Bri was a star, though, and Rachel was pretty good. Maia was a pro, of course, as was Tia when she got home from work. But then they make dumplings a lot. I ended up being in charge of making filling, I was pretty good at that. Mushrooms and kimchi and tofu – it was delicious! And we talked and laughed and I felt relaxed and (surprised) happy. It was beautiful. And… it was wonderful to see Rachel again. I’ll admit – to you but no-one else – that yes, of course I’m attracted to her. She’s fantastic. And so kind, and smart, and funny, and, well, gorgeous too. There’s a real spark, you know, and I get all babbling and silly ‘cause there’s no oxygen to my brain. It’s… been a long time since anyone made me feel like this. But… there is a but. I really can’t deal with anything romantic right now. I am very slowly getting to grips with everything after crisis on top of crisis and I’m not over Claire and I’m still overwhelmed with school and – and this is the most important reason – I want to focus on Bri. I want to make sure she is happy, well as happy as possible anyways, and that there is room for us to talk, and laugh and – cook! – and build our connection again. When that feels more stable, if Rachel’s still around and seems interested, then maybe we can try… something. (laughs) I don’t even know what people do anymore – and even less what they do in New Zeeland – I was in a relationship for almost three years that started off as a one-night-stand, hey, I have no clue! A date? Do people even go on dates?? Never mind. Not there yet, not sure I’ll ever get there. (sighs) I tried writing about my family. We had an assignment that was pretty unstructured, and was just ‘write what you know’ so I tried describing my parents, you know, as objectively as I could. They have good qualities as well as bad and I tried to bring them out but… it’s way too close. Just made me anxious. (sighs) Then I tried writing my coming-out-story – everyone has to write that at some point, right? And I never have. But of course my parents play a huge part in that as well. So in the end I wrote about… you. (nervous laugh) You don’t mind, do you? I wrote about meeting you and us becoming friends and flatmates and spending Christmas in Sweden with you and your Mom that year and how our friendship has always been about supporting each other. Nothing bad or incriminating, promise! I can send it to you if you like. Anyways. I need to start on my next assignment, where I have to make a phone book page somehow tell a story. Yep, same bananas professor. But it’s usually fun once I get into it. Have to finish that this afternoon, because – surprise! – Bri and I are going ballroom dancing! Yeah, shocked me too. But they have drop-in dance classes, and Bri was so excited when she saw it, that I just went with it. It’ll be a bonding sibling thing. Let me know what’s up at your end – you feel very far away today somehow. Sending oceans of hugs! Love you!
(clicks)
Scene 10.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
(Muffled party noises)
KAT
(drunk) Jess! I miss you! Sorry for the radio silence! I’m at Johnno’s, he’s – *we’re* having a party, I guess. Shirin and Emma are here, and loads of Johnno’s friends. I’m not sure they like each other very much. I feel… all wrong. (on the verge of tears) I’m wearing this dress Johnno gave me and it’s really nice, but, you know, not very me. It’s black, which is fine, but it’s short and poufy and in a shiny fabric which feels weird. Also (pause) I suppose it shouldn’t be a big deal, but (beat) Johnno just told me that this dress that I’m *wearing* used to belong to his ex. I mean, I shop for second-hand clothes all the time, and we’ve been shopping together at the vintage stalls in Camden Lock, but (pause) I just assumed he’d bought me a vintage dress, not that he’d found his ex’s dress in his closet and decided to give it to me. It feels weird. Is it weird? Or am I just being oversensitive? Johnno always says I’m too sensitive, that it’s upsetting when I cry. He says tears feel manipulative to him. Maybe he’s right. (tries to hold back tears) Damn! I need a cigarette! I just- it’s just that I’ve-
(party noises getting progressively more argumentative in the other room during the following)
KAT
(continues) I feel like he’s dressing me up as his ex. And in front of his friends who might well have seen her in this dress. And I had no idea. And I… I’ve been jealous of her. He’s talked about her quite a bit and… I’ve never been properly jealous before. I thought I wasn’t the type. And, dammit, the dress- the fucking dress is tight on me, so whatever else she is, she’s also thinner than me! Fuck! Oh, Jess, sorry to offload all this on you. I’m drunk, and tired, and upset, and I’ve been trying to cut down on smoking which isn’t helping.
(background party noise, sound of two people yelling, one glass breaking, then four people yelling, running feet, front door opens and slams shut)
KAT
(continues) What the hell is going on out there? (gets up)
(door opens, party noises increase)
SHIRIN
(slightly drunk, very angry) There you are! Emma and I are leaving!
KAT
Wha- what’s going on?
SHIRIN
That guy in there – Simon I think – is being an arse, and your *boyfriend* is defending him.
KAT
Wha-
SHIRIN
You coming?
KAT
I should-
SHIRIN
(putting on coat) Emma’s already outside, I’m going now.
KAT
OK. I’ll just tell Johnno-
SHIRIN
Fine. We will wait for exactly five minutes.
(SHIRIN leaves, front door opens and closes)
KAT
(calls into living room) Johnno? (beat) Johnno?
JOHNNO
(drunk) How’s my princess? You look so hot tonight… (kisses KAT)
KAT
Look, I’m going home with Shirin and Emma.
JOHNNO
No! You can’t leave! (grabs KAT and kisses her again) I have a strict policy against you leaving. Let me get you a drink!
KAT
(smiles) Nice reference, sweetie. I- (tempted) No. I think I should just go. We’ll talk tomorrow, OK? Go have fun with your friends.
JOHNNO
(pouts) But I wanna have fun with my *girlfriend*. (grabs at KAT again, but she slides away)
KAT
(opens front door) See you tomorrow, sweetheart. (gives JOHNNO a peck, to SHIRIN outside) Be right there Shirin! (remembers) Oh! (rushes to the computer) Sorry, Jess!
(clicks)
Scene 10.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hi Jess… (sigh) Sorry about last night. I was drunk, and everything was messed up. Turns out I also had PMS, which could explain some of the crying… Haven’t talked to Johnno yet today, I guess he’s still asleep. But Shirin and Emma filled me in on the details on the bus home last night. Apparently this guy Simon, a colleague of Johnno’s that I hadn’t met before, was trying to chat Emma up all night, I guess I just didn’t notice. At first she thought it was OK, he seemed nice enough, but it became more and more intrusive as he had more to drink, and when she said no he didn’t accept it and grabbed her and tried to kiss her. Emma of course started yelling at him, and Shirin supported her, and a glass got smashed by mistake. At this point Johnno jumped in and – the way Emma and Shirin tell it – was angry with them for making a big deal out of nothing. Also for breaking the glass, which was some special blah-di-blah design thing. I… I have to get his side of course. But either way I hate that they didn’t get along. They’ve met before, of course, many times, but my friends had never met Johnno’s friends before and I was hoping it would go really well. Yeah. It didn’t. (sighs) I miss you. I hope ballroom dancing was wonderful. (laughs) I know it makes your skin crawl to watch it, but maybe it’s better when you’re actually doing it? I’ll leave a more coherent message another time, and let you know how everything goes. And respond to some of the other things you were telling me about… I love you.
(clicks)
Scene 10.5
OLIVIA
Hang on, Kat didn’t even seem hungover! That’s not fair, she was pretty drunk the night before! Hmpf!
(TAMMI says something unintelligible)
OLIVIA
(continues) True, seems she left sort of early-ish… All right, I feel better now. But that guy Simon, and Johnno standing up for him? That is just revolting. I can’t believe Kat is so… so calm about it. I mean, yeah, she has to hear his side of the story and everything, but the fact that her friend has been sexually assaulted by her boyfriend’s mate is a really big deal.
(TAMMI says something unintelligible)
OLIVIA
(continues) You have to come closer, Tammi, *I* can barely hear you. What was that?
TAMMI
I said, it was a different time.
OLIVIA
I suppose it was. Long before hashtag-metoo and everything that followed. But still. Something isn’t quite right here. We will see what happens. (beat) Tammi’s helped me do a pre-recorded outro-thing, with all the contact stuff, so I will play that now. Saves me from recording the same thing every episode. Talk to you next week! Bye for now!
TAMMI
Bye!
OLIVIA
If you knew either Kat or Jess or any of their friends twenty years ago, I would like to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. The show is also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – on Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you have a minute, it would mean so much if you would rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. It can help others find the show. And a lso, it makes me very happy! If you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days! Our fantastic music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 11: MARCH 13-19, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 11.1
OLIVIA
Hello there, this is Olivia and the Y2K podcast. I’m back at the student radio station again – Tammi’s convinced them to let me record here for at least the rest of the semester. And I’ve convinced Tammi to come back and do the podcast with me sometimes. It’s good to have company every now and then! (beat) We had a very exciting field trip today, lots of fresh air and sunshine. And rocks of course! So now I’m tired in that happy way, you know? (stretches) I’m going to record this and then write a paper and then curl up and sleep! (beat) So last week Jess admitted to being attracted to Rachel, but decided to do nothing about it, and Johnno gave Kat his ex’s dress and also defended his horrible friend. Quite a week. Let’s see what we find out today. Welcome – to the year 2000!
Scene 11.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hi Jess. Had to re-listen to your last message as I wasn’t very focused the first time around… (slight laugh) Of course I already knew you were attracted to Rachel. Wicked obvious. (laughs) But I get why you’re not acting on it. And I get that what you need is time with Bri to establish some kind of… normal again I guess. And of course you can write about me, and about our friendship! And I’d love to read it – but I’ll probably cry! (laughs, gets serious) Though I’m trying to stop this whole bursting into tears all the time-stuff. It’s pretty childish, really, to cry all the time. Also I’m trying to give up smoking, but it’s hard. Very hard. In fact- (opens window, weekday evening traffic noise, lights cigarette, inhales, blows out smoke) Aahhh… (contented sigh) Only third one today. I’ll get there. But (inhales-exhales) it’s just so *good*… (sighs again) Johnno was very unhappy that I left his party Saturday. And I was really upset at how his friend Simon treated Emma. Johnno says he didn’t see any of that, he just heard Shirin and Emma yelling at Simon and one of his fancy design glasses breaking. He says of course he defended his friend against two people yelling and throwing glasses around. And I get that. I would defend *you* against any attack no matter what you’d done. (slight laugh) But I would also ask you about it, and try to figure out what happened. And if I thought you’d done something wrong, I’d try to talk to you about it. (inhales-exhales) That’s the bit that Johnno’s… not doing. And not intending to do either. He says blokes don’t talk about that kind of stuff. And… OK, fine, that’s his experience, but- I know plenty of men that *do* talk about all sorts of things to each other. So yeah, some of them are gay, and some of them are Swedish, and some of them are gay and Swedish, but… but the point is it shouldn’t matter. (puts out cigarette, closes window) Brr! Cold! It’s supposed to be spring but today’s been freezing. Well not actually freezing, but cold like- never mind. You get the point. So… Johnno and I argued over the whole party thing. He was disappointed I left, and said he felt that I chose Emma and Shirin over him. And… I did. Because they’re my friends, and one of them had just been treated appallingly. But that hurts him because he feels rejected. (sigh) He wants us to be everything to each other, and that’s lovely. I told him we’ve only just gotten together, we can’t be everything to each other yet. I have a history with my friends, with my family – well my mother, anyway, of love and support and stuff we’ve shared that makes them – you! – my.. rock. Rocks? (beat) Foundation. He can’t be that for me after… a month! And I can’t be that for him! I think he got it but I’m not sure. It’s all jumbled in my head now. We made up of course. (sighs) But I don’t think I’ll get Shirin and Emma to join me at one of Johnno’s parties anytime soon. I-
(00s mobile phone ringtone)
KAT
It’s my mother, um, I’ll call her back.
(KAT silences ringtone)
KAT
She’s worried about me. About this whole no-proper-job-thing. And she’s got the wrong idea about Johnno. I called her when I was upset about something, and now she can’t see the big picture. I know, it’s her job to worry about me. (laughs) I just wish she’d let me vent a little without it becoming this huge thing, you know? Anyway. Let me know what’s up with you! Love you!
(clicks)
Scene 11.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hey Kat. Wow. Lot’s happening at your end. So… (sighs) I’m kind of in your Mom’s corner here. (gently) I’m concerned about you with Johnno. Giving you his ex’s dress is… weird. Not telling you about it is even weirder. The money thing is also troubling… (sighs) He seems to be… I don’t know, trying to… control everything? Maybe he’s insecure and needs reassurance from you? Oh, I don’t know. Every relationship has its ups and downs, but it seems you two have had more downs lately… And for such a new relationship that’s… concerning. Also, if his friend is being an asshole, he needs to acknowledge that. There must have been more people in the room who can corroborate Emma’s story, right? So it’s *not* a “he said-she said” type of thing. (sighs) I really wish I was there. I wish we could have this conversation in person. I’m not trying to rain on your parade my dear, I know Johnno means so much to you. I want to make sure he is kind to you. All right? So… my news… (laughs) Ballroom dancing was actually surprisingly fun – I think Kiwis are generally a pretty relaxed bunch, and the dance people were so nice and welcoming, and it didn’t feel so… stiff, you know? Watching Come Dancing on TV it looks like they have rods up their butts, you know? And these people weren’t anything like that! Turns out there are like a gazillion styles of ballroom, we started with the rumba and as expected Bri was incredible and I barely got by. But we had fun, and – believe it or not! – we’re going again next week! Who knows, maybe when we meet next I will be a fully fledged ballroom dancer in sequins and ruffles and glitter, oh my! (laughs) Or… maybe not. Also, they offered Bri a part-time job manning their front desk a few nights a week, which is wonderful. Manning? Ugh! All these silly gendered words. Wo-manning? (beat) Next week is Bri’s birthday, so I’m going to try and organize a dinner for her, we don’t really know enough people for a party but that’s all right (laughs) And I got her this beautiful scarf that I’m sure she will love. Hey! I just realized we won’t spend *our* birthday together this year, that sucks! Maybe we can do a phone call or something… If we can deal with the cost. And the time difference. Let’s pencil it in “August 27, birthday phone call with Kat and Jess”. All right? And hey, I’ll be 26 and you’ll be 24, so together we’ll be 50! Yikes! If we were both in London we’d have a huge party, right? Or maybe not… (laughs) Anyways. Take care of yourself, my dear. You’re the only Kat I’ve got, you know. And you are definitely one of my very favourite rocks. (smiles) Oceans of hugs!
(clicks)
Scene 11.4
OLIVIA
I agree. (hesitates) Johnno is doing some really odd things. Doesn’t seem like Kat is realizing quite *how* odd. It’s worrying – though of course it’s already happened. Yeah. It is funny they have the same birthday. I remember– (stops herself) Right. Also as a Geology student it’s funny to me how they seem to think rocks are universally hard and solid. Ever heard of sedimentary rocks? Like limestone? (laughs) I’m going to go write my Geology paper (yawns) and then sleeeeeeeeep. Hard – like an igneous rock! (laughs) Until next week brilliant listeners, good night…
OLIVIA
If you knew either Kat or Jess or any of their friends twenty years ago, I would like to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. The show is also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – on Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you have a minute, it would mean so much if you would rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. It can help others find the show. And a lso, it makes me very happy! If you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days! Our fantastic music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 12: MARCH 20-26, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 12.1
OLIVIA
(trying to sound cheerful) Hey there, I’m Olivia, and this is the Y2K podcast! (beat) I’m a little low today. Everyone is worried about the Corona virus, and while Birmingham hasn’t been hit that hard, it really feels like we are living in scary times. Also talked to my mum earlier and… Meant to tell her about the podcast, but there is so much else going on that I didn’t get that far. She asked if I was coming home for Easter and I’m like… Why? I didn’t last year. And it’s not like traveling is encouraged right now. Also we’ve never celebrated Easter except for eating lots of chocolate. (small laugh) We’re non-religious chocoholics! And I can eat chocolates here without getting on a plane. I’m planning on maybe a hike, and then holing up with a good novel – all I ever read these days is for uni – and then lots of those celebratory chocolates. And no interfering parents… Anyway. So last week Johnno wanted to be Kat’s rock, Kat ignored her mum’s phone call, and Jess expressed some doubts about Johnno. Let’s see what they’re up to today! Welcome… to the year 2000!
Scene 12.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hey Kat, listen, (carefully) I hope you’re not upset that I brought up some concerns about you and Johnno in my last message… I just want you to be happy. And if Johnno makes you happy that is wonderful. Right? And you can vent all you like with me and I won’t lose sight of the big picture. Promise. Pinky swear. (beat) Yesterday Rachel was here again and I swear I cannot think straight when she’s around. Whoosh! Despite this we manage to have the most incredible meandering conversations. Yeah. Anyways… I’m busy prepping for Bri’s birthday – probably overdoing it to a ridiculous degree because I want it to be the *best* *birthday* *ever*. (tense laugh) Yes I’m overcompensating, but I think I’m allowed. I want Bri to feel like she has a family and a home here. I’ve booked this private dining room at the pub on the corner and lots of pub food… It’ll be us, Maia and Tia and Rachel and a couple of other people they know, and some of the ballroom dancing people – we’ve only been twice and Bri doesn’t start working there until next week but they are so nice and so I invited them on impulse – Bri doesn’t know. I was thinking of inviting some people from university as well – but Bri hasn’t met them so I guess that would be weird. But yes, I do have some people from school who are – well maybe not friends but hopefully getting there. I talk mostly to Helena, who’s a little quiet but so funny and silly and writes the most achingly beautiful poetry, and to Gavin, who raced through undergrad so is younger than everyone else, and has this wonderfully sarcastic sense of fun and is probably the one person in our whole year who will succeed as an actual fiction writer. Anyways. Maybe I should invite them too so it doesn’t feel like a sad, tiny celebration? (exasperated sound) I just want it to be good! (breathes in-out) Right, breathing… Crap. (breathes slowly) I need to calm down about this. (breathes slowly) Seeing my therapist tomorrow, maybe he will help… (another deep breath) I bought cute decorations today. Happy 21st! Balloons and stuff. You know. (smiles) Oh, remember your 21st? Also my 23rd… We didn’t want to deal with people so we had a flatmate get-together, you, me, Shirin and… Lee! Yeah. That was fun. And this will be fun too. (deep breath) Take care my dear. I love you!
(clicks)
Scene 12.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hi Jess, OK, sounds like you are getting a little too stressed out by this party planning. I am sure Bri will love it, and you don’t need to invite more people or make it huge – sounds like you have all the ingredients needed for a great night – food, friends and silly decorations (laughs). So try to chill a little on this one, OK? Also…(beat) It’s OK. It *was* hard to hear you say you were concerned about me and Johnno. (sighs) But I can’t blame you really – I think I only give you one side of the story. Johnno and I have our issues like everyone else, but there are so many good things going on too. (smiles) Like yesterday I found out I got this TV ad for – you won’t believe this – for IKEA! – and he was so happy for me and bought me the biggest bouquet of flowers I’ve ever seen! I’m looking at it right now and it takes up half of my room! (happy sigh) It feels a little silly somehow to be in an advert for a Swedish brand, but that’s why I got it. So not complaining! And, you know, we have so much fun together. He makes me laugh, and think, and feel special, and brings me to all these amazing events and shows and everything. It’s like he’s showing me a whole new London that I never knew before, it’s amazing! (giggle, grows more serious) Also, we talked some stuff out last week and, well, cleared the air I guess. Wait, talk out? Clear up? Have out? Ah, you know what I mean! I think he’s grasping the money issue better from my perspective, and he agrees that his friend Simon behaved badly towards Emma, though he only relented on that point when his other friend told him what they’d seen… On the other hand, I can’t blame him for being loyal to his friends, I am too, and I really value that. (pause) So, back to my TV ad! (delighted squeal) I’ll be a woman who is incredibly good at assembling Billy bookshelves, and who just churns them out and builds a whole library while her husband does the dishes. Yes, typecasting! As you know I *am* incredibly good at assembl ing IKEA furniture, though I didn’t get a chance to show that in the audition (laughs). We’ll be filming it in a studio in Hampstead in a few weeks, and I can’t wait!
(muffled voices in distant background)
Also – it pays real money which is such a relief. Won’t help in the long run but is very nice right no-
(JOHNNO opens door)
JOHNNO
Hello sweetheart! (kisses KAT)
KAT
(surprised but pleased) Johnno! I thought you were still at work!
JOHNNO
I left early to see you sweetie. I booked a table at Pied à Terre tonight to celebrate your TV ad.
KAT
Wow! OK. That’s- (beat) That’s lovely, but I have plans with the flatmates tonight.
JOHNNO
(annoyed) Really?
KAT
Yeah, it’s quiz night at the pub round the corner and we used to go all the time, but I haven’t been in ages, so we decided to go tonight. (beat) I guess I forgot to tell you, sorry about that.
JOHNNO
But I made reservations. And… I’m sure we talked about doing something tonight.
KAT
Did we? I don’t remember that.
JOHNNO
We did, yesterday.
KAT
Oh, OK. (beat) I’m sorry. I must have gotten mixed up. (beat) All right, I’ll cancel the quiz night.
JOHNNO
(smiles) Good. (kisses KAT)
KAT
Right. (pause) So when’s the reservation? And… what on earth should I wear? (starts rummaging in closet)
JOHNNO
Anything you like, sweetie. A sexy dress maybe?
KAT
(distracted) Yeah. (sniffs her armpit) Hm. Do I have time for a shower?
JOHNNO
(looks at watch) Not really, we need to leave in about twenty minutes.
KAT
OK. (looks in dresser, in closet again) Maybe this one…
JOHHNO
Or maybe the one you wore at the party?
KAT
No! I can’t wear that. It’s- (beat) It hasn’t been washed. (deep breath) This one’ll have to do.
(discards jeans and t-shirt, puts on dress, sound of zipper struggle)
JOHNNO
Let me help you with that. (zipper) Wow. You look gorgeous in everything sweetheart. (kisses KAT)
KAT
(smiles) Thank you dar- sweetie. OK. (looks around room) Hang on! I think I’m still recording for Jess! (laughs, to computer) Sorry Jess! I think I was pretty much done. Have a great week, talk to you soon! (beat) Oceans of hugs!
JOHNNO
(questioning) Oceans?
(clicks)
Scene 12.4
OLIVIA
(laughs, mimics) “Oceans?” (laughs again) Sorry. That sounded funny. An IKEA ad, that’s not bad! I wonder if I could find it on Youtube… Probably not, too old! Also I want tell Jess to relax a little… In a way it’s like they are characters to me at this point. Even though I know they were actual people and of course still are actual people now, twenty years later, this world of theirs, at this time… it’s all *very* different from the people I know today. We’re more the same age, and they seem much easier to relate to. I suppose… I always thought of my parents as… not old… but static. Like I’m the kid so I am doing all the growing and changing and they are done with all that. But lately they… are changing things, and changing (hesitates) as people and doing things they never used to do and… well, it freaks me out. They’re supposed to be stable, dammit! (sigh) I know that’s not fair. Or reasonable. (small laugh) But maybe listening to all these voice mails and hearing my mum as a younger, less sure and… unformed version of herself is helping me understand her a little better now as well. That’s the idea, anyway. (beat) All right, enough rambling for today. Take care of yourselves, listeners. Stay safe and healthy in this scary world. Talk to you next week. Here comes the outro. Bye!
OLIVIA
If you knew either Kat or Jess or any of their friends twenty years ago, I would like to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. The show is also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – on Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you have a minute, it would mean so much if you would rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. It can help others find the show. And a lso, it makes me very happy! If you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days! Our fantastic music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 13: MARCH 27-31, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 13.1
OLIVIA
Hello everyone, Olivia here, with the Y2K podcast. Spring is here at last – today has been a glorious sunny day and it is *finally* starting to smell properly like spring! I’ve been out running and feel all energized and happy. Though we were supposed to have a field trip today and of course that didn’t happen as all my courses have moved online now… (sighs) So… I’ve got some listener e-mails, thank you so much. One person who wanted to be anonymous asked about- well they basically asked what I was thinking putting these voice mails out into the world like this. If I’d thought about what I am doing releasing these very personal stories into the world. And… I think that is absolutely valid. I am not really being fair on my mum and her friend doing this. Not to mention all the other people involved. (beat) Not that I knew there would be anyone but Kat and Jess on those tapes! That was definitely a surprise. Another surprise was how emotional and personal and dramatic and… raw things are on the voice mails. I suppose I thought they would be more like regular voice mails, you know? More like short check-ins and mundane descriptions of everyday life. (sighs) When I started I was- (voice wavers slightly) I was angry at my parents. Disappointed. And upset. And there was so much about this time that I didn’t know. I thought I would play some chit-chatty messages and hopefully get a few people to listen and maybe find someone who knew more about what was going on with my parents in 2000, who could answer some of the questions I have that I don’t know how to ask my parents. I definitely didn’t expect… all this. And now I don’t feel like I can stop. I’ve got some leads and I feel like this podcast and you, wonderful listeners, could lead me to some of the answers I want. So I’ll go on. But yes, I will tell my mum and her friend. I just have to find a good time to do it. (beat) Right… last week Jess went overboard party planning for Bri, and Kat got a surprise fancy dinner. Welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 13.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Oh Kat, last night was.. bad. Fuck. (beat) Bri got visibly stressed out by the random group of people, and it was such a weird dynamic of cliques who didn’t know each other, also it turns out the ballroom dancing people don’t drink, which is fine in every way except it made Bri feel that she shouldn’t drink either, and that made me feel like I shouldn’t drink, and the two people in that room who would have actually benefited most from a beer or two to de-stress didn’t have any, which made it worse. I wanted it to be fun and relaxed and for Bri to feel appreciated, but I ended up getting completely worked up about every little detail and (beat) I- I yelled at the bar staff. About the beermats being the wrong color. I know, it sounds ridiculous. (small sad laugh) Like a bridezilla! Crap. (sighs) You were right, as always, when you said to tone it down a little. But I was so caught up in everything that I couldn’t stop. I knew deep down that I was overdoing everything but it just… snowballed. (sighs) I guess it turned more or less all right after a while, though. Maia got Bri talking about horror movies, and that of course led to The Blair Witch Project and Bri has lots to say on that. Turns out Gavin also loves horror, so he could join in. Rachel, being wonderful as always, distracted me with, well herself, but also food and sympathy. And everyone else got over being incredibly awkward and settled on being only medium awkward with each other… I think the food was all right, though I hardly tasted any of it. People left semi-early, but who could blame them? Ugh. I tried to talk to Bri after the party, to explain, but she avoided me and went straight to bed. And I get it. (sighs) At least I have no physical hangover today, just an emotional one. Oh Kat, I’m a wreck. I spend so much energy on getting everything done in school and trying to take care of Bri that I- I- (verge of tears) There’s nothing left. I feel empty. And so very tired. Like I could sleep for a week. But then when I do try to sleep I can’t relax. I just lay there and all the thoughts and doubts I haven’t made time for during the day pop up and demand attention. And it’s like every single thing is of equal – and enormous – significance. Like the fact that I said a slightly weird thing about bunnies to Helena last night looms just as large as the fact that I gave Bri a crap birthday party. Along with thirty other things. It’s so noisy in here, I don’t know how to deal with it. (cries) Kat, I-
(gentle knock on door)
JESS
(wipes tears) Yes?
BRI
Can I come in?
JESS
Bri! Yes! Of course!
(BRI opens door)
BRI
(smiles) Hi sib.
JESS
Hi. (swallows tears) I’m so sorry about last night, Bri.
BRI
(opens arms) Come here.
(They hug. Jess sobs a little.)
BRI
(continues) It wasn’t that bad.
JESS
(pulls BRI with her to sit) Really?
BRI
Well…
JESS
(tentative smile) I yelled at the bar staff.
BRI
(smiles) Yeah, you did.
JESS
I was… pretty stressed.
BRI
I know.
JESS
Everyone tried to tell me to not make too big a thing out of this party, that I was overcompensating, and I knew they were right, I just couldn’t stop myself.
BRI
(smiles) Gavin’s cool. He’s got the entire Nightmare on Elm Street movie collection on VHS.
JESS
(smiles) I didn’t know that.
BRI
See? I wouldn’t have known that if you hadn’t invited him.
JESS
Right. (laughs) Friends again?
BRI
Always. (stands up) Brunch?
JESS
Yes. (remembers) I just have to finish up this message for Kat.
BRI
Hm. Cool. (to door)
JESS
(smiles) Love you Bri.
BRI
Love you sib.
(BRI leaves, closes door)
JESS
Oh Kat. So that was Bri. And she’s not mad at me. (relieved sigh) Feel better now. But… still tired. Yeah. Have to figure out how to deal with that. My therapist suggested anti-depressants last time. He said they can even out the highs and the lows. And I’m sure they can, but it feels weird, you know? If I start altering my body chemistry who knows what will happen? Like when that doctor put me on birth control pills to “regulate my period” and all they did was make my period pain worse and my sex drive plummet to zero. I don’t usually respond well to medication that does anything more than relieve pain…
(knock on door)
MAIA
(muffled) Brunch is almost ready!
JESS
(opens door) Thanks Maia. (beat) Oh, that smells wonderful!
MAIA
(smiles) Bri is making French toast.
JESS
Oh wow. (verge of tears)
MAIA
You all right?
JESS
Yes. (beat) Very all right. Thanks. (smiles)
MAIA
(smiles) Right. See you in the kitchen.
JESS
(closes door, sits down at desk) Kat. I should finish up so I don’t get interrupted again. (smiles) And so I can go have brunch. Dad used to make French toast sometimes on Sundays when we were kids. It was a special treat. And it feels right that Bri’s making it now. (beat) Let me know what’s up with you. Kat. Did you have a good time at the fancy restaurant? Also, don’t forget to book another quiz night with the flatmates, you need to keep up the tradition, especially now I’m not there to remind you. Love you!
(clicks)
Scene 13.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Jess! It was great to finally hear Bri’s voice! Next time you have to make her say hi, OK? And I’m sure the party wasn’t quite as bad as you thought it was. Even if it was, people won’t mind too much. It’s huge for you, and made huger by the fact that you are depressed and not sleeping, but for most people a so-so party is just something that happens that they don’t think twice about. OK? (beat) Notice how I slipped in the word depression? Because I think that’s probably what’s going on. Don’t you? And… I know about depression, remember? My mother’s been on anti-depressants more or less her whole life. So if your therapist says you should consider medication, you should consider medication. And they’re not the same type of medication as birth control pills, so I’m not buying that excuse. Also there are lots of different types, and your doctor can help you find the right one for you. (beat) Lecture over. (smiles) I just don’t want you to dismiss something that has a very good chance of making you feel better. Okidoki? (laughs) OK, so now that I’ve lectured you we can move onto my amazing news – Johnno and I are moving in together! Well, technically I’m moving in with him, but who cares about technically? I am very excited – I’ve never lived with a boyfriend before. Well, you know that. (laughs) We got talking about it, and I’m over there practically all the time anyway, and he suggested I simply… not leave. He’s very generously offered to let me pay the same rent I’m paying now, even though his flat is of course *much* more expensive. Our flat soon! I’m so happy! This whole lugging stuff around in my handbag is getting really old – plus I never have what I need when I need it, it’s always at the other place. So I talked to Shirin today, and handed in my four-week-notice, but I’m moving tomorrow! I have to pack all my stuff – and figure out where it all goes at Johnno’s place – *our* place! Have to get used to saying that. (laughs) I’m so excited! (hums I’m so excited) He needs to give up some closet space – and some bookshelves! And there is no bathroom cabinet so not sure what to do (beyond excited) We have to go to IKEA! We can be one of those couples that go to IKEA! Though we won’t argue like those couples, we’ll just buy great cheap stuff and have meatballs for lunch! It’ll be like introducing Johnno to a piece of Swedish culture! Well, I’m sure he’s been to IKEA, but not with an actual Swedish person! And I can buy salty liquorice!! Yay!! He probably hasn’t had it before – remember when you tried it? You were very brave, but I know it’s definitely not your thing… (laughs) OK, I have to go start packing! I hope you can *breathe* a little, you know? Seems like it’s been one thing after another for you. Take some you-time, OK? And remember: you are amazing and can do anything. Just breathe. (breathes) Love you!
(clicks)
Scene 13.4
OLIVIA
(laughs) I actually like salty liquorice! Probably one of very few people at this uni who does! (beat) I’m glad Jess ended up being open to anti-depressants. Her attitude seems very foreign to me. But I guess times have changed. Also my parents have always been such advocates of medication for various ailments, including depression, and vaccines, and… Yeah. Sometimes it’s good that times change, right? (beat) So you’ve heard me talk about our Patreon in the outros – it’s where you can support the show through monthly donations, and we try to come up with fun things to share with you to say thank you. We’ve recorded the first Patreon-exclusive episode, Tammi and me. (slight laugh) I have no control over it really – Tammi runs the whole thing which is perfect. All I have to do is just show up and talk! We had a lot of fun, and our wonderful Patreon supporters can hear the first Tammi’s Takeover in about a week! Excited to hear what you think! That’s all for today – stay safe out there – here’s the outro.
OLIVIA
If you knew either Kat or Jess or any of their friends twenty years ago, I would like to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. The show is also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – on Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you have a minute, it would mean so much if you would rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. It can help others find the show. And a lso, it makes me very happy! If you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days! Our fantastic music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 14: APRIL 1-9, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 14.1
OLIVIA
Happy Easter, to those who celebrate! And happy April to everyone! This is Olivia and the Y2K podcast, and I am heading towards some glorious days off from uni where I will enjoy fresh air and read some novels. I got the latest Holly Black in January but haven’t read it yet, so that’s top of my list. And hopefully a hike or two. I can’t wait! (beat) Onto the voice mails. Last week Jess calmed down a little and Kat decided to move in with (slight hesitation) Johnno. Anyway. Welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 14.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Kat! Wow. Moving in with Johnno. Congratulations! I guess you’re already moved in by now, that’s… quick. But, yeah, great. (sighs) I’m sorry. Don’t mean to sound so… fake. (warmly) I’m happy that you are so happy. (smiles) And I hope you had fun at IKEA – scoping out the place before shooting the big commercial, huh? Anyways. I’m a little worried you’re moving so fast – Ha! Moving! I’m hil-ar-i-ous! – but I’m happy as long as you’re happy. And I’m glad you are getting some new stuff, you have to make it yours, you know? Not only when it comes to getting space in the closet and the bathroom cabinet, make it yours with some Kat-ness, some pillows, and books, and flowers, and silly posters, all those little details that claim a space and make it yours. (beat) Rachel was here again today, she helped Maia carry stacks and stacks of damaged books from the library – their basement got flooded so they had to discard loads. It’s sad when books get destroyed, but I love that Maia is making them into art. Anyways, what I wanted to get to is that Rachel still makes me all dizzy and flushed. It’s not going away, if anything it is stronger. I… I might have to do something about that. (sigh) Also I’m slowly calming down after the birthday party mess. Bri is so great. Once I stop stressing about everything I see that she doesn’t actually need me to tie myself in knots wanting to magically make everything perfect for her. She’s all right just being here, and talking, and finding small ways to heal. And it’s such a relief. (breathes) Why do I do this? (small laugh) Why do I always feel like I have to fix everything? (sighs) Sometimes I’m exhausted with myself, you know? (beat) All right. I will be open to medication. It’s just- Yeah. (smiles) Going to stop making excuses. At least for now. I’m going to make myself a cup of Earl Green and get going on the reading for tomorrow. Let me know how everything is – I hope you are in newly cohabitating bliss (smiles). Hey, wasn’t there some cool Swedish word for cohabiting? Simba or something? (laughs) Yeah so even I can tell that’s wrong! But hope you’re a happy simba anyway! (smiles) I love you!
(clicks)
Scene 14.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
SHIRIN
(a little uncertain) Hi Kat, it’s Shirin. You’re not answering your phone, or my texts, so I guess I’ll give this odd voicemail thing a go. I just wanted to (beat) see if everything’s all right. You moved out so quickly and I hardly had time to talk to you. So… I hope Johnno… I hope Johnno’s being nice. All right? That’s all. And we’re off to quiz night next week, join us! Oh, and your Mum called the flat – I suppose she didn’t know you moved? I told her. I hope that was all right. (starts saying something but stops herself) Right. Bye!
(clicks)
Scene 14.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hey Jess. Thanks for the well-wishing. Not quite in bliss but a happy *simba* all the same (smiles). Always fancied myself a lion, or even better a lion king! (hums “Can You Feel the Love Tonight”) It’s ´sambo´ actually, so you weren’t too far off (small laugh). Literally means ‘co-live’… I went to IKEA on my own in the end. Johnno had to work. Which is fine. I got some closet organizers and a lamp shade and some plants and, you know, some random stuff like a whisk and some oven mitts. Then I hauled it all back on the bus which took forever, but I was pretty happy when I got back. And I got some salty licorice of course. Licorice… Johnno bravely tried it but spit it out even faster than you did! It was pretty funny. So I’ve been decorating a little, and got all my clothes up. Most of my books are still in a box, there’s not really any room for them yet. Will have to drag Johnno to IKEA so we can buy and haul home a bookshelf! But I do have a pile of books on my side of the bed, which is nice. (beat) And yes, keep an open mind about medication. When’s your next therapy appointment? I’m off to work in a minute, promise to leave a longer message next time. Love you!
(clicks)
Scene 14.5
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
CLAIRE
(energetic, nervous but hides it) Hey Jess-ica, surprise! It’s me. Claire, in case you’ve forgotten my voice. Yeah, Kat showed me how this thing works a few weeks ago and I figured it’s a nice cheap way to get a message through. Straight to the point: Kat’s being really strange. She moved in with that creepo boyfriend of hers last week and honestly it’s not making much of a difference here since she was hardly ever around, but she just grabbed her stuff and left when we were all out. And her room is still a mess of discarded shit. Also Kat’s mum called yesterday and didn’t even know she’d moved. We think something’s off. We had a kitchen palaver about it and I was nominated to message you. Tried to tell them you’d probably prefer to hear from anyone but me, but they insisted. So here I am, reporting for duty. (fake US accent) Ma’m yes ma’m (more serious) Kat’s not been herself for weeks. It’s like she’s (beat) acting some happy version of herself but can’t quite keep it up. Not sure what you can do from the land of the Kiwis but you could always get through to her when no-one else could, so, give it a go, right? (pause) And I guess you heard about Rose. Yeah. I bet on the wrong horse. (fake Italian accent) The shit-eh does the-happen. (unhappy laugh) Bye then.
(clicks)
Scene 14.6
OLIVIA
Claire. Right. I don’t get it. Why would the flatmates think Claire would be the best person to message Jess? Why not Shirin or Emma? That makes no sense. You don’t make recent exes interact unless you know they get on really well. And these two definitely don’t. But-
(OLIVIA’s mobile rings, it’s on silent so only makes those static disturbance noises.)
OLIVIA
(continues) Sorry! Forgot to turn my mobile off. It’s my mum, better get that. I think I was pretty much done anyway, dear listeners. I’ll say bye for now, and pop on the outro, hang on… (beeps and clicks, the outro does not start) Hey mum… I’m fine, actually I just finished-… All right…. You… what?… She’s-… What do you mean you’re-… (very upset) I… I didn’t know. I thought it was temporary. Why didn’t you tell me? I thought I… Bloody hell. (angry) Did you two think I wasn’t interested? That I didn’t care what’s going on in my own family? (almost crying) Well, you thought wrong…. Yeah… (the other person is upset, OLIVIA calms) Mum, I-… Of course… Yeah… No, I’m (beat) all right… Do you want me to come for Easter after all?… You’re sure?… I could check if there are any cheapo student rates left?… Right… I’ll stay here… (deep breath) Talk to you later?… Love you too, mum. (hangs up, beep) (pause, mutters) Didn’t it start? (some clicks) Why didn’t it start…There… (deep sigh, cut short by click and outro starting)
OLIVIA
If you knew either Kat or Jess or any of their friends twenty years ago, I would like to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. The show is also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – on Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you have a minute, it would mean so much if you would rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. It can help others find the show. And a lso, it makes me very happy! If you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days! Our fantastic music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 15: APRIL 10-16, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 15.1
OLIVIA
Hello brilliant listeners, I’m Olivia, and this is the Y2K podcast. Today Tammis’ here with me, say hello!
TAMMI
Hiya!
OLIVIA
What have you been up to today, Tammi?
TAMMI
Starting off our Palaeontology module – I’m excited!
OLIVIA
(smiles) Me too.
TAMMI
I think for most of us this is why we chose the course – we’re all just dinosaur-loving kids, really (laughs)
OLIVIA
(laughs) Yes we are – though, you know. We’re all science geeks too.
TAMMI
Yup.
OLIVIA
“We’re all mad here” (BOTH laugh) Anyway. I am starting something new this week, and showcasing trailers for other podcasts that I think you will enjoy. Please listen to the very end of the episode to hear the first one!
TAMMI
Very cool.
OLIVIA
Let’s go to today’s voice mails. Last week, Jess was still interested in Rachel and Kat made Johnno try salty liquorice. You want to say it with me Tammi?
TAMMI
Sure.
BOTH
Welcome… to the year 2000!
Scene 15.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hi Kat. Is everything all right? I got the weirdest message from Claire, of all people. She said the others had nominated her to call me – why *would* they do that? Hearing her voice was unsettling in itself, but the message was about (beat) you. She’s wo-, no they’re all worried about you, Shirin, Emma and Claire. Kat, what’s going on? I’ve been concerned about you and Johnno, and it seems you are moving things along pretty fast, but so far you’ve managed to convince me that everything is fine. And I guess I’ve wanted to believe you, but maybe I should have dug deeper. Please get back to me asap. This is freaking me out. I love you! I miss you. And I just want you to be happy, if possible. Sending oceans and oceans!
(clicks)
Scene 15.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Oh, Jess (almost in tears) I’m sorry Claire got you so worried. I am OK. Really. Shirin left a message for me too, but I suppose I didn’t take it seriously. And I didn’t know Claire was leaving one for you. Are you OK about that? Must have been strange hearing her voice. I think they probably decided to divvy up the tasks so that Shirin called me and Claire called you. They probably felt Emma wouldn’t be able to stick to the script… Actually they were probably right! So. Yeah. I’ve not been so communicative with the flatmates. Former flatmates I should say. I just don’t really have the energy for them, you know? Plus I’ve been sort of avoiding Claire. Not only on your account, though of course there’s that. But also for me, you know. I used to be pretty good friends with Claire when you were together, and it was strange to lose that all of a sudden. And then when she’d treated you so very badly she became the villain, of course, and then she moved in and became the flatmate and- it was all far too confusing. And then after that thing with Emma and Shirin at Johnno’s party I sort of felt like I had to choose who to support, and of course I chose my boyfriend. What else could I do? And it became very hard to hang out with them and I retreated a little. I-
(front door being unlocked and opened)
JOHNNO
Kat? You home?
KAT
(to Johnno) In here!
JOHNNO
(comes in and kisses Kat) Hello princess! Had a good day?
KAT
Mm, I-
JOHNNO
(interrupts, enthusiastic) So we’re having dinner with Simon and his wife tomorrow – you’re not working are you?
KAT
No- Wait, yes I am. But I can probably swap with someone. (realizes) Si-
JOHNNO
(interrupts) Great! So I-
KAT
(interrupts) Wait, Simon’s *wife*?
JOHNNO
(annoyed) Yes. You interrupted me. What was I- oh yeah, I have-
KAT
(interrupts) Your colleague Simon? The one who assaulted Emma?
JOHNNO
(really annoyed) Don’t say that, he was just drunk. And I am trying to tell you –
KAT
(interrupts) He’s married? And we’re – I don’t want to have dinner with him!
JOHNNO
(furious) What the hell? He’s my friend!
KAT
(so angry she’s crying) He’s- he’s awful! What he did-
JOHNNO
(furious) Your friends aren’t as perfect as you think!
KAT
What- That-
JOHNNO
(lashing out) Shirin cheated on Dave. And Emma will fuck anything on legs, so should be pretty impossible to assault her.
KAT
You- That’s- What the f-
JOHNNO
(yells) Will you listen to me?
KAT
(angry) What?
JOHNNO
(calmer, petulant) I booked us train tickets to Paris for Easter. But you won’t even let me tell you about it, so I suppose I should just throw them away. Is that what you want?
KAT
That’s great. But-
JOHNNO
(icy cold anger) Look. I’ll rip them up and throw them in the garbage.
KAT
You don’t have to do that. (shakes head as if to clear it) We were talking about Simon and (beat) what you said about Emma, that’s just not true-
JOHNNO
(interrupts) She’s slept with practically everyone I know, man, woman, both or neither, so I _
KAT
(interrupts) She hasn’t, actually. And if she had it wouldn’t matter. That’s not the point, she-
JOHNNO
(angry, exasperated) So what is your fucking point, Kat?
KAT
That Simon is a creep, and he’s married which makes him even worse. (voice wavers) I don’t want to have dinner with-
JOHNNO
(interrupts, petulant) I just wanted to surprise you. But it’s all ruined now. I’m going out.
KAT
Johnno! We have to talk about this.
JOHNNO
(putting on shoes and jacket, like the words taste bad) No. We really don’t.
(Door closes)
KAT
(softly) What the hell is happening? (cries, walks to another room)
(new kind of softer click)
Scene 15.4
OLIVIA
Hello, Olivia here, in editing mode. I (beat) cut out about half an hour of Kat sobbing and moving around the apartment. It was… pretty grim. Figured I’d spare you that. Um, nothing else, apart from a click at the end. Didn’t sound like Kat turned it off, I think it probably lost internet connection and turned off on its own. Right, that’s all from me for now. Here’s the next voice mail.
Scene 15.5
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Oh shit. Hi Jess. I just realized I didn’t turn this off but it seems to have sent you the voice mail anyway. Who knows what’s on there. Just as I was trying to reassure you, too. (sighs) I don’t know what to say. I’m so tired. Johnno’s still out, it’s been over two hours. I have to go to work soon.
(KAT’s mobile rings, 00s ringtone)
KAT
(continues) Oh! (disappointed) It’s my mother. I cannot deal with her right now. (turns off mobile) Right. Have to go. (shaky) No worries, all right? I’ll be fine. We’ll make up. It’s what we do. Love you!
(clicks)
Scene 15.6
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Oh Kat. That didn’t exactly make me less worried. Also, hearing someone’s fight is… horrible. Sometimes when Claire and I argued I felt like she wasn’t really fighting fair, you know? Like she kept throwing me off balance with new accusations and didn’t let me have my say. I feel like that’s what was happening with you and Johnno. You know what I mean? I don’t really have any advice for how to deal with that, except, maybe, talk to him about it? Not that I ever had the guts to bring it up with Claire… I don’t think she was aware she was doing it, I think it was some sort of defense mechanism. And I definitely didn’t see it as clearly then as I do now, and especially after listening to the fight you just had. I a m so sorry you are hurting, my dear. And I hope you can sort this out. You say you always do, which is good, but it also implies you fight like this a lot. Do you? Remember back in March you were describing the first fight you and Johnno had, and you were worried because you’d been yelling and screaming and it wasn’t like you? Don’t forget that. Don’t let this become normal for you if you feel it isn’t you. (small laugh) Right, that’s pretty convoluted, sorry. I mean be careful you don’t get lost in all this. One of the things I took away from the whole débacle with Claire is how important it is to be kind. It’s so underrated but it is crucial. She wasn’t kind to me at a basic level. And I wasn’t very kind to her either, especially towards the end. I guess that bit just failed in our relationship dynamic. Sorry, didn’t mean to make this about me… Ugh. Hate that I’m so far away! I want to give you a big hug and drag you out for a long walk and talk and talk and talk until we feel like we have sorted everything out and understand it together. So I’m going to beam over to London RIGHT NOW so we can do that. Right? Right. Scotty? (beat) Damn. I guess my transporter beam is broken. (smiles) We’ll have to make do with voice mails a little while longer. (sighs) So I had another therapy session today. And you’d be proud of me. I was open to talking about medication and he referred me to a doctor. He said medication might help not only with depression but also with getting me to sleep better, which was the clincher for me – I’ve been having trouble sleeping and it makes everything worse. So, if it all works out, I should be seeing a doctor and start medication next week. Can’t get any worse, right? (laughs) …she says, right before another burning building falls on top of her… Yeah, I know it can get worse. But it could also get better. So here’s hoping! Listen, take care of yourself, and pay attention to how Johnno makes you feel. Right? I love you! Oceans of hugs!
(clicks)
Scene 15.7
OLIVIA
We’re back. All this relationship drama!
TAMMI
Yes, they’re not having an easy time of it.
OLIVIA
I really don’t understand why they put up with it.
TAMMI
Well.. Passion? Connection? Sex? Support?
OLIVIA
Yeah. Well I wouldn’t want it for myself, so maybe that’s why.
TAMMI
None of it?
OLIVIA
Not really. Oh, maybe the connection and support of a relationship would be good at some point. But I’d have to find a partner who was fine with me being ace.
TAMMI
OK, that makes sense. I’m not really after, you know, a relationship either at this point – too much other stuff I wanna do.
OLIVIA
(smiles) Absolutely. (beat) Now, there was something I was going to talk about…
TAMMI
Merch!
OLIVIA
Yes! Thanks! I wanted to tell our listeners that we have t-shirts and mugs and hoodies and lots of other stuff with the Y2K logo and quite a few other designs as well – for example one design with ‘Welcome to the year 2000’ and another one with ‘Oceans of hugs’. You can find them at y2kpod.com/merch
TAMMI
(smiles) There are also pillows and beach towels, for some reason.
OLIVIA
(laughs) Well, they were there, so I though why not.
TAMMI
It’s great! Just funny.
OLIVIA
(smiles) Yeah. Think we’re done.
TAMMI
Yeah, bye!
OLIVIA
Bye!
OLIVIA
Please listen to this trailer – enjoy!
(Trailer for SEREN)
OLIVIA
If you knew either Kat or Jess or any of their friends twenty years ago, I would like to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. The show is also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – on Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you have a minute, it would mean so much if you would rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. It can help others find the show. And a lso, it makes me very happy! If you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days! Our fantastic music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 16: APRIL 17-23, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 16.1
OLIVIA
Hello! Olivia here, with the Y2K podcast – but you know that, right? (smiles) I can’t believe we’re at episode 16 already… I got some messages about the end of episode 14. Um, I didn’t listen to it before posting and yes afterwards I did realize that the phone call I had with mum got recorded on there but I couldn’t be bothered with it at that point. (small smile) Call it context. Or something. (beat) I also had a message from someone who thinks they might know Johnno now, and asked if I wanted them to contact him for me. And I just want to be very clear on this – I am so grateful for all of you sending me information on the people and the goings on from 2000, but please, let me contact whomever I want to contact, don’t contact anyone on my behalf. Right? Just send me the info, if you want to. Thank you so much. Please stay tuned to the end of the episode for a podcast we think you will really enjoy. (beat) So, last week, Kat and Johnno had a big fight and Jess decided to get anti-depressants. Welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 16.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hi Jess! Today’s the day! I’m off in a bit to shoot the IKEA ad and I am so excited! (laughs) I just can’t hide it! (hums “I’m so excited”) I’ve never done a big ad like this before, in a big studio! I can’t wait! I’m booked all day for one very short TV ad so I guess there will be a lot of waiting around, but I don’t care! I’m going to be *excitedly* waiting around! (squeals) I’ll report back tonight – keep your fingers crossed for me today! Love you!
(clicks)
Scene 16.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Kat! Wow! This is the day! Sending every positive thought your way – not that you’ll need it, you will be fantastic! Can’t wait for your update! (beat) So… I sort of have some news. Um. Last night Tia and Maia had a bunch of people over, just a few of their friends, and it was really relaxed and fun and Tia had made these incredible mini-pies with goat’s cheese and caramelized onions and – yeah, sorry, you want to hear the news, not me rambling on about the food. (laughs) Though the food was fabulous! (beat) So, I know I said I didn’t want to jump into anything, but… Rachel was there, of course. And she is so wonderful, and so gorgeous, and we talked pretty much the whole night, and it was easy, you know? No ‘urrr’ moments, no snags or misunderstandings or little annoyances, it just… flowed. With Claire I always felt like we were in some weird competition, and if I wasn’t losing she’d be in a bad mood. But Rachel is so easy to talk to, and she really listens. Anyways. In the end everyone else had either gone to bed or gone home and… We kissed. And it was so nice. Right, that doesn’t sound very exciting, but it *was* exciting, hugely exciting, mind-blowing and toe-curling and all that good stuff… It’s just that it also had that easy and nice and loving feel from the conversation we just had. Nothing else happened – though it was very clear we both wanted it to! – Rachel had to travel to a library conference in Wellington early this morning, or it might have been a different story. (laughs) But the whole thing makes me so happy. Whatever happens next, and yes I’ll admit that of course I want this to happen again, and more… This was really beautiful and makes me hopeful that there are kind people in the world, and some of them might actually like to hang out with me. Right, saying that out loud sounds a little odd. It’s just that everything’s been so *hard* for such a long time, and somehow, talking to Rachel, and, yes, kissing Rachel, made me… *exhale* for the first time in… (incredulous) a year or so? And yes, yes I do realize that sounds like a Whitney Houston-movie… (laughs) But that’s how I feel. Like I can breathe again, and like I don’t have to be so weighed down with all this crap that’s been happening. I feel lighter. And it can’t be the medication, because I only started that yesterday, and the doctor said it takes weeks to start having an effect. So it’s probably Rachel. And maybe the knowledge that the medication is happening, and will hopefully start to work soon. And also that Bri is feeling so much better and doesn’t need me as much. I feel… good. (almost in tears) Finally. I-
(knock on door)
JESS
Yes?
(door opens)
MAIA
Jess, could you possibly help me with – Oh, sorry! You’re recording for Kat?
JESS
I am, but I’ll be done in a minute.
MAIA
Um, hello Kat? (to Jess) Is that odd? I don’t know Kat…
JESS
No! It’s nice! (smiles) I am sure she says hi back! So what did you need help with?
MAIA
Right. So I am dyeing fabric and it is all getting a little unwieldy. I put too much in and now I can’t move any of it around without risking a purple flood all over the kitchen floor.
JESS
(laughs) Right, I’m coming. Don’t want a purple flood!
MAIA
(smiles) No, we really don’t. Thanks!
JESS
(to Kat) Well, you heard all of this Kat, I’d better go!
MAIA
Thank you, that would be wonderful. Aaaand, you can tell me all about what’s going on with you and Rachel…
JESS
(smiles) What makes you think anything’s going on?
MAIA
Um, I was there last night?
JESS
(smiles) All right. (to Kat) Love you! Sending good thoughts your way today, and can’t wait to hear how it was! Oceans of hugs!
MAIA
So, tell me…
(Clicks)
Scene 16.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
I’m back! Exhausted but very very happy! And even happier hearing your news! So amazing that something finally happened with you and Rachel – I’ve been waiting for this for weeks! (more serious) And even more amazing that you feel better, and lighter, and happier. Things have been so tough for you – and for Bri – for such a long time that it’s simply *your turn* to be happy now. OK? OK! (beat) So let me tell you about today. It WAS a lot of waiting around, but my on-screen husband was really nice, so we sat around and chatted while they set up endless scenes and lights and cameras. There were so many people there! Made me dizzy. And so the first few hours I was pretending to build Billy bookshelves – they wouldn’t let me build much for real which was a bit disappointing, but I get it – and chatting to Dan – that’s the pretend-hubby. Then it was time for the lines which I knew perfectly at home but they *flew* out of my mind the moment we started. Completely freaked me out. But the director – Sarah – was really chill about it, she said it happens to a lot of actors once they get on set. Dan also said it had happened to him countless times, don’t know if that was true but made me feel a lot better. So Sarah just told me to review the lines and try again, and I did, and it went really well! We did many takes, in a few different versions, but apart from the first time, none of the retakes were my fault, so it was fine by me. And it was fun! It was energizing to be in front of a camera, and even if it was a one-time-ad-thing it felt like a collaboration which was lovely. Made me want to do more! And longer! (laughs) Yeah, movies! Not sure how that will happen, though… Anyway, I-
(door opens)
JOHNNO
(annoyed but tries to hide it) You done yet?
KAT
Not quite, sweetie.
JOHNNO
(unhappy) You’ve been away all day and it’s late. I thought we could have some take-out and watch Buffy.
KAT
Sounds great. You want to order and I’ll be out in a bit?
JOHNNO
(angry but trying to control it) Fine!
(closes door firmly)
KAT
(sighs) I’d better go. I think I’d told you the important bits anyway. I am so happy things are looking up for you! Love you!
JOHNNO
(muffled) You comi-
(Clicks)
Scene 16.5
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hi Claire. Um, thanks for the message. It’s Jess, by the way. But you know that. (beat) I’m worried about Kat too. I’ve heard Johnno sometimes on the voicemails and he is… not nice. I heard one fight they had and… yeah. I’ve tried to approach it in a few different ways but it’s like I can’t get through to her. And I don’t want to criticize Johnno too much or maybe she won’t want to talk about it at all. (sighs) I am so damned far away. So powerless. Which is why I’m reaching out to you. I thought maybe you and Emma and Shirin could talk to her. Do an intervention-type-of-thing, you know? Or… something? At least you’re all nearby. So. Yeah. That’s all. Thanks. Bye Claire.
(clicks)
Scene 16.6
OLIVIA
An intervention. Hm… I wonder if that would work. Kat doesn’t seem open to much criticism of Johnno or the relationship at this point. Also… she seems pretty distant from the flatmates, I’m not sure if they are close enough to get through to her. Also it’s hard, because yes, Johnno is truly being awful, but in a way that’s sort of hard to pinpoint. Oh, I don’t know. Have to remind myself that this has all already happened. (sigh) And I know how it ends up. Well parts of it anyway. And, I guess that sort of puts everything in perspective. Not everything that feels vitally important when you’re in your 20s will stay important. So much of what they’re focusing on I have never heard of. That should make me feel better about the stuff going on with my parents now I guess. Should. Not sure it actually does… Sorry to be so depressing, listeners! I think I’ll go for a run and clear my head. Here’s this week’s trailer – hope you like it! ‘Til next week!
(Trailer for Listen Rinse Repeat)
OLIVIA
If you knew either Kat or Jess or any of their friends twenty years ago, I would like to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. The show is also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – on Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you have a minute, it would mean so much if you would rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. It can help others find the show. And a lso, it makes me very happy! If you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days! Our fantastic music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 17: APRIL 24-30, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 17.1
OLIVIA
Olivia, Y2K, blablabla – do you actually listen to what I say here at the top? (smiles) You probably do, right? Sorry, didn’t mean to sound like I don’t care. I do care. Very much. I’m just a bit frustrated right now. My parents are… (long pause while she thinks of what to say) flawed. Which is reasonable, right? Everyone is. I just have a really hard time with it. (sigh) Also I did some calculations, and… probably a little before this time of year in 2000… I don’t quite know when as I’m not sure if I was born late or early or right when I was supposed to but … I was conceived. Which is a dizzying thought. (beat) So I guess soon my mother will be pregnant in the files and it’ll be obvious who’s who. In a way it’s probably good, but I have enjoyed not defining this. It’s made it easier to distance myself from what’s going on in the voice mails and… everything else. (beat) You know what? I won’t confirm it straight away. I’ll leave you hanging a little, just to ease myself into the whole thing. All right. (smiles) You have been warned. (beat) On to this week’s voice mails. Last week Kat shot a TV ad and Jess got together with Rachel. Let’s see what they’re up to this week. Welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 17.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
(library ambience)
KAT
(very quietly crying, low voice) Oh, Jess! I don’t know what to do! This morning we argued about… not sure what it was about really… I was telling Johnno about the shoot, and about me flubbing lines and about how supportive everyone was… I guess he got jealous of Dan? Which is silly, there was no flirtation there, and you know me, I don’t even think about other people when I’m in a relationship. It’s just not me. Anyway. We got into this awful yelling thing that we apparently do, and I don’t know (voice breaks) what happened, or what he said, but all of a sudden I (beat) hit him. I’ve never hit anyone in my life. But I slapped him. And it left a red mark. And… we were both shocked, I think. And of course I apologized, and we stopped arguing and made up, but (sobs quietly) what is happening to me? What am I doing? This isn’t (voice breaks) me. I just don’t recognize myself. (deep breath) I miss you so much Jess. I feel like I’m adrift without an anchor with you away. These voicemails are great but… Yeah. (sighs) But they are something. So much better than e-mails. (library noise, small laugh) My turn at a library today – Johnno’s working from home and I just had to get out of the apartment. Don’t think I’ll meet any gorgeous librarians like you did though (small laugh) – or if I did I wouldn’t notice them. (groans) I feel awful. Leave me a cheerful message if you can, my dear. I think my paid-up computer time is winding down, and the sadly un-sexy librarian is throwing me odd looks. I love you. I MISS you. So much. Oceans of hugs!
(clicks)
Scene 17.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Kat! Wow. So sorry everything is so tough. I’ll send you a proper message later, but I’ve recruited Bri to sing a silly song with me. So bear with us, ok? You ready Bri?
BRI
Yep.
(BRI and JESS sing silly folk song hoping to cheer KAT up. BRI on guitar.)
(To the tune of “Scarborough Fair”)
BRI: Is she coming to Auckland eN Zed
BOTH: Kat is nice, and funny and smart
JESS: We can make up an extra bed
BOTH: We love Kat she´s perfect and fab
BRI: Tell her to bring us a lot of beer
BOTH: Kat is nice, and funny and smart
JESS: We would welcome her and we would cheer
BOTH: We love Kat she´s perfect and fab
BRI: We can go to the beach and have fun
BOTH: Kat is nice, and funny and smart
JESS: We sure think she could use some sun
BOTH: We love Kat she´s perfect and fab
JESS: And she sure is a true friend of mine… (BOTH laugh)
JESS
(laughs) Love you Kat! So that was fun for us, I hope it made you smile a little! And thanks Bri!
BRI
Anytime, sib. And hey Kat. I’m sorry things are hard.
JESS
Right. Love you, Kat! Bye!
BRI
Bye.
(Clicks)
Scene 17.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Thank you Jess! And thank Bri for me! (laughs) That was funny, and silly, and lovely. You are just the best! (near happy tears) So, yes I am feeling better, but not only because of your wonderful singing (smiles). I… I’m pregnant. (incredulous laugh) After I’d left you that message I started thinking about why I wasn’t feeling myself, and I thought I probably have PMS, and then I started trying to remember when I’d had my last period, and then I realized it was a while ago. (smiles) And I went to Superdrug and bought a pregnancy test, and, yeah. (slowly) I really am pregnant. And I know it’s early days, and Johnno and I haven’t been together long, but… We’ve talked about kids. We’d both like three. So maybe it’s a good thing we’re getting started! We’ve even talked about names… I… I haven’t told him yet. He’s at a work thing, won’t be home until tonight. I want to see his face when I tell him. (smiles) I think he’ll be a great father. He always has so much energy, and so many fun ideas. (smiles) Oh Jess, I’m so happy! You know I’ve always wanted to be a mother and now it’s happening! Eeeek! So not coming to “eNZed” for a while I’m afraid – but thank you so much for the lovely song! It made me laugh and cry and very much feel like you’re here… How’s uni? And… how is Rachel? Huh? Let me know! I love you! Bye!
(clicks)
Scene 17.5
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
(worried but happy but worried…) Oh, wow, Kat! (beat) Congratulations! That is wonderful! I didn’t realize you were already talking about kids, but I am sure this will be perfect. It has to be, right? And you will be the best mother ever! This kid is very very lucky! And, you know, whatever ridiculous hormonal journey this pregnancy is going to take you on, I am right here, ready with sympathy and completely unresearched advice… (laughs) Just wow. You are the first of my friends to get pregnant, you know? So you need to tell me if I’m doing it wrong… (nervous laugh) I feel like I’m going to be an auntie! That’s wild! I have this weird urge to go look at baby clothes – isn’t that silly? Plenty of time for that! (beat) Um, you asked about Rachel. (smiles) Yeah, we’re together. (laughs) She got back from her conference and… we made up for all that waiting! It was… truly glorious. And very, very hot… Anyways, yesterday was Anzac Day which is a bank holiday here, so Rachel and I went for a hike in the morning. Fall is finally coming here, and it was one of those gorgeous crisp days. We ‘walked’n’talked’, and we both want to take this further, but we agreed to take it slow. (beat) She’s also coming off a rough break-up – though not quite as recent as mine – and I guess we are both trying to guard our hearts a little. It was a really good conversation. (beat) And then in the afternoon Rachel was doing a poppy-making workshop at the library for kids, and she asked me to join her. I agreed, provided I didn’t have to make a single poppy, and she promised (laughs) She kept her word, too. I was put in charge of doling out supplies, which I s perfectly in keeping with my skillset. (laughs) It was fun to hang out in the library with the kids and some of their parents. (beat) Yikes! I just realized that could be you in a few years… well more like five or so but, that is mindboggling. You’re going to be a parent. Woah. (smiles) Anyways… You asked about school. Um, I am learning a *lot*. The pace is ridiculous, but I feel like I am more in sync with it now, you know? I don’t feel like I am constantly running to catch up anymore, I am still running, but along with everyone else. And I am churning out text, there is never any time to really think about writing, there’s just doing the writing, and then jumping on to the next writing assignment. But I think that’s part of the point. Like the first year of drama school where they were throwing improv at us from every angle until we stopped thinking and started just *doing*. Exactly like that, actually. (smiles) We’re in writing boot camp and I don’t think it ends until the year is up… Which is fair enough. So, my dearest Kat. Mommy-to-be. I am so happy and a little scared. But I know it will be “a-mazing”! You will make it amazing. Talk to you soon. Love you! Oceans and oceans!
(clicks)
Scene 17.6
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
SHIRIN
(worried, trying to sound upbeat) Hello? Kat? It’s Shirin. You all right? Next week is quiz night again, and you NEED to be there, we miss you! (very firm) If you don’t show up we will come drag you there. We know where you live, remember? No choice. No excuses. So. See you Tuesday 7 pm at the Stag. Bye.
(clicks)
Scene 17.7
OLIVIA
I… (lost for words) …Right… Well, I am sure you probably think I planned that… It’s what I would think… But… I really didn’t. I don’t listen ahead. Um… Yeah. So… Saying nothing. (deep breath) Right. Please listen to this trailer.
(Trailer for Oz 9)
OLIVIA
If you knew either Kat or Jess or any of their friends twenty years ago, I would like to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. The show is also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – on Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you have a minute, it would mean so much if you would rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. It can help others find the show. And a lso, it makes me very happy! If you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days! Our fantastic music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 18: MAY 1-7, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 18.1
OLIVIA
Hello dear listeners, Olivia here, and very soon we’ll be heading back to Y2K… Today is one of those rainy gray days that I always forget make up most of spring… Guess there is a reason most Brits talk so obsessively about the weather! Hope it stops raining tomorrow – and that would be today for you listeners! – Tammi and I are planning to walk the Tolkien Trail. We’re both Tolkien fans – who isn’t, really? Though I will admit to getting bored sometimes when there are just SO MANY MEN and SO MANY BATTLES. Really long ones. Still. Looking forward to see some of the places that inspired Middle Earth. We’ll go even if it is raining, of course, but would be nice if it didn’t – so keep your fingers crossed for us please! (laughs) Anyway…. Last week Jess sang a song with Bri and (slight hesitation) Kat found out she was pregnant. Welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 18.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Good morning Jess! I feel great! I keep forgetting that I’m pregnant, and then I remember, and it’s like I have the most happily delicious secret ever. I do everything I normally do, but I’m pregnant! And only you, Johnno and my mother know. I wasn’t supposed to tell my mother – Johnno and I decided to wait – but I had to call her anyway, she’s been trying to get hold of me for ages, and… It’s like she’s telepathic or something. She always knows when I’m hiding something, so she kept subtly digging and digging until I just couldn’t keep quiet. She took it pretty well. To be honest I think she thought it was something really bad. The thing I wasn’t telling her. I mean, she was younger than me when I was born, so she knows it’s completely doable. And she never had a partner in parenting like I have Johnno. She did a great job, but I’m glad I don’t have to do it alone like she did. Seems really tough. Not that you ever know what will happen… Anyway. Johnno is so happy! He wants to buy baby stuff *right now* but I convinced him we should wait a little. I went to see the doctor, and she just confirmed that I’m pregnant and gave me an appointment for a 12-week-scan. Apparently that’s when the biggest risks have passed and you can start telling everyone. I’m in week… 5 or 6 probably. Still figuring out the lingo. (laughs) The baby is the size of a sweet pea now. Which is really sweet but also baffling. So tiny and… so vegetable-like. Anyway. I’ve been auditioning this week, for two plays and another TV ad – this one for washing-up liquid. Probably won’t get any of them, but I can’t help trying to figure out the timing in relation to the baby – will I show when this play opens, or when this is shot…? And of course I have no clue. Yeah. But I can’t stop auditioning, at least not yet. So me and my sweet pea are doing auditions. (smiles) And we’re doing the pub quiz thing with the flatmates tomorrow as well, Shirin left a really strange sort of upbeat but threatening message saying they would drag me there if I didn’t show up. And Johnno has a gig so I figure, why not. Don’t know how I’m going to hide the not-drinking from them, though… I’ll think of something. (beat) Sounds like you and Rachel are in a good place. Very, very hot, huh? I’m so happy for you! And thanks for – finally! – telling me a little more about uni. Makes sense that it’s an immersive course, and I am so glad you’ve finally found your pace. (looks at watch) Oh! Time to get ready! It’s a bank holiday here, and Johnno’s taking me to Brighton for the day – oddly I haven’t been yet, it’s only a short train ride away. It’s spring here, finally, and today looks like one of the good spring days. Wish you could join us! Love you!
(clicks)
Scene 18.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hey Kat, wow, Labour Day in springtime Brighton sounds incredible. I hope you had an awesome day. It’s so great to hear you so happy. And yeah, I’ve never understood that whole comparing-babies-to-fruit-thing. It’s not food, people! (laughs) My day was full of catching up on assignments, but it was nice to have a whole day of making sure I am on track with everything. I did this one assignment where I had to Disney-fy one of my old stories, and figure out where they would burst into song and dance, where the big mopey ballad was, and so on and so on. It was fun! And also made me look at the story in a new way, which of course was the point… And last night Bri and I – well mostly Bri if I’m honest – actually all Bri – made dinner for Maia and Tia. She made vegetarian poutine and it was greasy delicious. Hey, I set the table and… ate? (laughs) It felt good, and normal, and routine in the best way possible. I’m putting down roots, Kat! Just tiny tendrils so far, but still, roots! If you’d told me that in January I never would have believed you. Ha! Roots – root-ine! (laughs) Poot-ine! Right, being silly now, sorry! Fact is I’m feeling pretty damned good too. And yes, some of it is due to Rachel. She is just a really good person. And I can talk to her and tell her all about my fears and the bullshit baggage I’m still carrying around from Claire and she listens and understands like it’s no big deal. But it is *huge* to me. To be… talked to, and not talked down to. To be listened to and not judged. It is such a relief. We’re still taking it sort of slow, but I feel like the connection is getting stronger by the minute. It really doesn’t care that we’re trying to be sensible and take it slow! It’s all-encompassing, emotional and physical and… everything. It’s intense, but not heavy. I’ve never been with anyone like her. I always thought relationships were something you had to *work* at, and crap did I work on being with Claire, but this… is no work. Of course there are outside factors that can be annoying, and I am sure if we stay together we will fight like everyone else, but the core fabric of our relationship is easy, and light, and it is wonderful. Right. Enough gushing. I saw my therapist the other day and gushed at him too. He was surprised, I think. I guess not all his patients sit down and start rambling about how happy they are all of a sudden (smiles). But he seemed to think I was doing well, and that I am responding well to the medication. Which: yay! And thank you. Not sure I would have considered it if you hadn’t been so stern about it. (smiles) I’ve always had this idea that you should only need medication for physical stuff, like broken bones and high blood pressure. It’s what my p- it’s what people said when I was growing up. But that is nonsense. And I am glad I finally see that. Oh! Watch out for that computer virus! The I love you-thing. Also – no virus here, but I do love you (laughs). Be happy, mommy-to-be!
(clicks)
Scene 18.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hey Jess. So I went to quiz night and it was… strange. Claire, Emma and Shirin were all sort of distracted, and no-one paid any attention to the quiz, which never happens. Also it was on the trade union movement, which I actually know a bit about. They kept sort of rotating around me, asking questions, mostly about Johnno and me. They didn’t even seem to notice I was drinking Sprite the whole night, they were so intent on… whatever that was. Are they suspecting I’m pregnant? Then why don’t they just ask? It freaked me out a little actually. I left early. And just as I was leaving, Claire of all people tried to give me a hug and said, very intently, “Take care of yourself”. I avoided the hug and didn’t know what to say so I just left. Last time Claire said more than two words to me she was yelling at me over laundry. (beat) The only info of any note I found out the whole night is that Lee – my manager – is moving into my old room. Surprising. I didn’t think Shirin liked him very much. But it’s not my problem, they can do what they like. OK, I have to run to work – maybe I can get some intel from Lee on what is going on with them. Love you! Bye!
(clicks)
Scene 18.5
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
CLAIRE
(matter of fact, faintly hostile) Hey Jess, just wanted to update you on the Kat sitch. So – last night. It took some effort, but I think the message got through to Kat. Emma and Shirin and I took turns talking to her, Shirin was the bad cop, I was the good cop – not my first pick! – and Emma was the neutral facilitator. We missed most of the quiz, but it was fine. Just some history stuff. Right. Talk to you later. Or, um, yeah. Bye. It’s Claire. Yeah. Bye.
(clicks)
Scene 18.6
OLIVIA
(laughs) All right, so this isn’t working quite the way they planned… (small laugh) Absurd! I wonder what Jess thought after these two messages? Illustrates how differently folks can understand the same situation, I suppose. (beat) I am getting… concerned about that. I mean I am putting all this out here but it’s mainly Kat’s and Jess’s words. Their perspective. For example I wonder how (slight hesitation) Johnno would feel about this? Or (slight hesitation) Rachel? Or Claire, for that matter? I feel like I am airing their – very old and musty – dirty laundry. Oh well. I’m doing it, can’t very well stop now, can I. I- (stops herself) Right. Here’s this week’s trailer, hope you like it. Talk to you next week.
(Copperheart trailer)
OLIVIA
If you knew either Kat or Jess or any of their friends twenty years ago, I would like to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. The show is also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – on Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you have a minute, it would mean so much if you would rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. It can help others find the show. And a lso, it makes me very happy! If you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days! Our fantastic music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 19: MAY 8-14, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 19.1
OLIVIA
(excited) Hey, Olivia with Y2K here, welcome! Tammi’s here with me today.
TAMMI
(excited) Hi everyone!
OLIVIA
And we have exciting news!
TAMMI
Yes we do!
OLIVIA
We found out today where we’re going for our year abroad. (smiles) Any guesses? (beat) We’ll just say it! You with me Tammi?
TAMMI
Absolutely!
OLIVIA
We’re going to…
OLIVIA (at the same time as TAMMI)
Auckland!
TAMMI (at the same time as OLIVIA)
New Zealand!
(They BOTH laugh. A lot.)
TAMMI
(still laughing) Auckland!
OLIVIA
(still laughing a little) New Zealand! (beat) I guess you can tell we’re excited! We’re starting in late July, so not much time to get everything together.
TAMMI
Yeah, we need to pack!
OLIVIA
And get plane tickets!
TAMMI
And figure out housing!
OLIVIA
I think they’re going to help us with that, actually .
TAMMI
Good. But we need student visas!
OLIVIA
Yep. So many things to do. And before you send concerned e-mails, the university has checked everything, and we will not be putting ourselves to any more risk than if we’d stayed in Birmingham. All right? Safe as houses. (beat) Let’s roll the voice mails so we can get started!
TAMMI
Yeah!
OLIVIA
So (beat) last week, Kat had a very odd quiz night, and Bri made poutine. Not even going to try to say it together this time, Tammi. (BOTH laugh) Welcome… to the year 2000!
Scene 19.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hi Kat, hope everything’s good today! Did you end up asking Lee what’s going on with our former flatmates? The way you described it sounded pretty ridiculous. Almost farce-like? (small guilty laugh) They are surely up to something… So today is mother’s day here, and in Canada as well. Mom hasn’t called since that horrible time in February. And I haven’t called either. And Bri wouldn’t pick up if either of them called. Before… before I moved to London, before they knew that I’m a lesbian and Bri is transgender, before… everything, we- they- my parents used to think mother’s day and fathers day were so important. We’d make them cards, and presents, and have cake, and it was all… a big irrelevant sham. Our family wasn’t warm and loving, we weren’t celebrating beautiful bonds between parent and child, we were just acting out what we thought was the right scenario. Like we were all in a fucking play, for Christ’s sakes! And then when we didn’t fit the parts they’d written for us, our parents booted us out into the world and slammed the door. I am angry – can you tell? Furious! (grunts and kicks at floor) (beat) Hey. I’m angry. That’s a good thing. And a good feeling. They *deserve* my anger. I-
(footsteps, soft knock on door, JESS opens)
JESS
(continues) Hey Bri- wow, what’s that?
BRI
For you.
(Bri places tray on Jess’s desk and pours coffee, clink of spoons on plates)
JESS
Really? Thank you!
(Bri hands Jess a small box)
BRI
Happy sib day.
JESS
Sib day? Oh! Yes. (almost in tears) Happy sib day, sib!
(They sit down)
BRI
Open your present.
JESS
All right. (unwrapping small box, opening jewellery box) That is so beautiful. Thank you. Pāua shell, right? Such a gorgeous shimmer.
BRI
Apparently in Māori tradition pāua shell signals change and transition. And connection.
JESS
You- you really are the best sib ever. You know that?
BRI
(smiles) Likewise. (beat) Hey, your coffee’s getting cold.
JESS
Yeah.
(Both grab their coffee, BRI serves cake)
JESS
Mm, this is delicious. Did you make it?
BRI
Yep.
JESS
Of course you did. You are incredible. I love you.
BRI
Love you sib.
(clink-slurp)
JESS
(small laugh) You know, I’m still recording for Kat. I forgot.
BRI
OK.
JESS
Or maybe not quite forgot… I’m getting so used to letting stuff happen even when I am recording, and in a way it feels like I am inviting Kat further into my world, you know.
BRI
Makes sense.
JESS
But I can stop if it makes you feel uncomfortable?
BRI
No problem. (beat) Hey Kat? (pause) You want to hear my news?
JESS
(laughs) I am sure she would! And so would I!
(BRI hands JESS a letter)
JESS
(Continues) University of Auckland… You’re in?!
BRI
Yup.
JESS
That’s wonderful! (reads) Start in August… transfer credits, good… scholarship! You got a scholarship?
BRI
I did.
JESS
This is the best day! (hugs BRI again) You hear that Kat? Sib day is the best day ever! (laughs) Oh, this makes me so happy.
BRI
Me too, sib. We can have lunch together. (smiles) And you can help me with *all* of my assignments.
JESS
(laughs) Come on Bri, we have to tell Maia and Tia!
BRI
Aren’t you forgetting something?
JESS
Right! (to computer) I love you Kat! Talk to you soon! Oceans and oceans! Bye!
BRI
Bye Kat!
(clicks)
Scene 19.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hi Jess! You and Bri are so lovely together it makes my heart melt! And happy sib day! I feel I can join in a little in this amazing new holiday (smiles). So glad Bri is staying, and going to uni, and that you are both sending down roots in Auckland! Though I was kind of hoping you’d be back living in London at some point, but that is purely selfish of me (smiles) I of course want you to be where you are as happy as possible and where you have the most interesting things to occupy your days. And I get that – at least for now – that is very much Auckland. And for me, right now, it is right here. With my blueberry baby! (laughs) OK, I’ll stop. But it is so danged funny. And alliterative! (to the tune of Blue Velvet) Bluuuue-berry baby… Johnno and I are in a good place right now. We’re both so happy about this pregnancy. And it – of course – got me to finally quit smoking those last two cigarettes a day, which is a relief for him. And for me! Honestly I feel sort of queasy most of the time anyway so don’t really feel like smoking much. But don’t tell him that! He’s so proud of me for quitting. (laughs) (beat) I did check with Lee about him moving to the flat, and he didn’t really have much to add – he’s moving in next month, and as far as he knows, nothing special is going on. So who knows. It felt like they were all doing one of those improv things where one person comes into a scene they know absolutely nothing about, and they have to figure out what kind of person they are and what is going on. Only I never figured out what scene we were doing. Or what my role was. Maybe I should try to talk to Shirin alone… Not sure how, though. All we’ve ever done alone together is go to the pub and chat in the kitchen. And watch TV. Don’t live there anymore, and can’t have beer, so… Coffee maybe? (sighs) I’ll figure it out! (beat) Oh, got a call-back for that washing-up liquid TV ad. It’s not hugely exciting, but something. Not sure I can be as enthusiastic about washing dishes as I was about building bookshelves, though! (laughs) But it’s recording in a few weeks so *if* I am cast the baby definitely won’t show. Still so happy! My body *feels* completely different but it looks the same. Everything is a little tender and achy and bloated but I feel… good, you know? I forget sometimes and when I remember I just start smiling like a… baby? No, a.. what’s a really-self-satisfied animal? A cat (laughs) Of course! I’m the cat that got the cream. (laughs) OK my dear, I have to head to work. Friday night so a little busier than usual – at least I won’t be bored! Love you! Oceans!
(clicks)
Scene 19.4
OLIVIA
And we’re back! Seems like they’re both pretty happy for once.
TAMMI
Yes – and Bri and Jess were adorable.
OLIVIA
They were. And Kat was a happy cat. And you and I are happy too!
TAMMI
We are! Everyone’s happy for once. (laughs)
OLIVIA
(joking) We should just stop the podcast right here and make it a happy ending!
TAMMI
(joking) We should.
OLIVIA
(semi-serious) All right. The end.
TAMMI
(joking) Grand finale!
OLIVIA
(serious) Maybe we should.
TAMMI
(catches on) Really? But… There’s so many more files… And… I want to know what happens.
OLIVIA
Yeah. (small laugh) You’re right. We want to know what happens. I just… have concerns, that’s all.
TAMMI
I know. Heard you last week. I get it. But I also know you started this for a reason.
OLIVIA
(sighs) I did.
TAMMI
And we have listeners now. They want to know what happens too.
OLIVIA
(smiles) Yes. I know. (beat) All right. We’ll go on. (beat) I’m glad you’re here, Tammi.
TAMMI
Me too. (beat) Also I really REALLY want to know what happens next.
(OLIVIA laughs)
OLIVIA
Well, I can tell you what’s about to happen right now.
TAMMI
(smiles) What’s that?
OLIVIA
You’re going to tell our brilliant listeners about our merch.
TAMMI
Oh! Yes I am. We have merch! T-shirts and mugs and lots of other stuff too, with the Y2K logo and quite a few other designs. Go to y2kpod.com[slash]merch to find out how you can get some.
OLIVIA
All right. I think that’s it for today – here’s this week’s trailer. Bye!
TAMMI
Bye!
(The Prickwillow Papers trailer)
OLIVIA
If you knew either Kat or Jess or any of their friends twenty years ago, I would like to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. The show is also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – on Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you have a minute, it would mean so much if you would rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. It can help others find the show. And also, it makes me very happy! If you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days! Our fantastic music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 20: MAY 15-21, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 20.1
OLIVIA
Hi everyone, my name’s Olivia and this is the Y2K podcast. But you know that. (smiles) Last week was a pretty happy episode all around – and I’m still feeling great. I’m going to New Zealand! There are going to be so many brilliant field trips and digs and excursions – New Zealand is fascinating and unique from a geological perspective, it’s- Yeah. (smiles) Not what you’re here for. ‘Welcome to Olivia’s Geology Podcast’ (laughs). And New Zealand is unique in many ways apart from geology. The flora and fauna for example – I’m looking forward to lots of stunning hikes! Also, I- (stops before she says too much, smiles) Let’s move onto the voice mails. Last week Jess was happy for Bri and Kat was a happy cat – basically everyone was happy for a change. Welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 20.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hi there, happy Kat! (laughs) I can see you now, with a big cat grin. Perfect! I am so happy you’re happy. And I am sure you’ll be able to sound excited about washing dishes if you get it – you are a great actor after all! So, has Johnno told his parents about the baby? You haven’t met them yet, right? Guess that would be a… conversation. But even if they are a little apprehensive, they’ll come ‘round once they’ve met you, so, you know. Keep grinning. (smiles) Sorry. Guess this popped up in my head because Rachel asked me to go to Rotorua to meet her family. This taking-it-slow-thing isn’t going so well (smiles). Anyways, they’re a huge family – Mom, Dad, FOUR sibs and two sets of grandparents all living in the same neighborhood. Plus assorted nieces and nephews and aunts and uncles and cousins and goodness knows who else. They seem absolutely wonderful from Rachel’s descriptions, and I love the idea of a big family, but it’s also… pretty early days. And… intimidating. I mean, my whole family these days consists of one other person, and meeting big groups of new people tends to trigger my anxiety, so… Yeah. Also I cannot help feeling like a bumbling Canadian probably stepping on their cultural toes without meaning to, um, yes. The well-known cultural toes of New Zealanders… (laughs) You know what I mean. And I know I’m being silly. Not the anxiety thing, but the rest. Maybe I can ask Rachel if I can start with just her parents, or one of her sibs or something. Everyone at once is probably a bit much at this poi-
(Mobile phone rings, JESS checks phone)
JESS
(continues) It’s Rachel, let me get this, probably just logistics.
(answers phone, Rachel’s voice is only just audible)
JESS
(continues, on phone) Hello my love!
RACHEL
Hey love, we need to talk.
JESS
What’s up?
RACHEL
Can I come over?
JESS
Now?
RACHEL
Yeah.
JESS
(confused) Sure. What’s going on?
RACHEL
We really need to talk.
JESS
(frowns) Right. (beat) You’re… freaking me out.
RACHEL
Sorry. Don’t worry. See you in 5 minutes.
JESS
Right. See you.
(beep as JESS hangs up)
JESS
(continues, to KAT) She’s coming over. Says we need to talk. But not to worry. What’s going on? Fuck. ‘We need to talk’. That’s code for ‘I’m breaking up with you’, right? Right? I don’t understand. I thought we were fine, thought we were great, actually. Fuck. (tries to calm herself down by breathing) Right. She has said nothing about breaking up. It’s just in my head. Until she actually says it I can’t assume that’s what will happen. It could be anything. Right? Yeah. Could be *anything*. (breathes again) Like what? Something with her family? Something at work? A wonderful surprise? (nervous laugh) Probably not that last one. Five minutes is an incredibly long time to wait. Maybe I should just turn this off-
(Quick footsteps, knock on door, door opens)
JESS
Rachel-
(Rachel gives JESS a quick peck)
RACHEL
Jess, I-
JESS
Hang on, I-
RACHEL
Stop. I just need to say this. Before I lose my nerve.
JESS
I-
RACHEL
Please?
JESS
Mm.
RACHEL
All right. I love you.
JESS
(draws breath to speak)
RACHEL
(quickly) But that’s not what I need to tell you. (deep breath, blurts out quickly but gently) I’m pregnant. If all goes well I’ll have a (incredulous) baby in January. And I would really like to be in a relationship with you. And for you to co-parent this kid with me. (new breath) I know it’s a lot, and I completely understand if you don’t want any of this, but I’ve been thinking about it all night and… this is what I want. (long pause) Are… are you all right?
JESS
(shocked, tears in eyes) I thought you were breaking up with me.
RACHEL
(horrified) What? No!
JESS
(small smile) That’s good. Wow. I need to… process.
RACHEL
Of course.
JESS
Yeah.
RACHEL
(teary-eyed smile) At least you haven’t run out the door.
JESS
I won’t. I… I love you. (smiles through tears) But this… this is big. You know.
RACHEL
I know.
JESS
So… some time?
RACHEL
Yes. There is time.
JESS
(remembers) Crap! I tried to tell you but you wouldn’t let me. I was recording for Kat. It’s still on, I think.
RACHEL
(embarrassed laugh) All right. (beat) Well, hi Kat! Sorry about bursting in.
JESS
(by computer, small laugh) Yeah. You got a lot in this message, Kat. (beat) Take care my dear. I’ll talk to you soon. Love you!
(clicks)
Scene 20.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hi Jess! That *was* a lot! And… wow. You have to get back with an update soon. That was like… a proposal, really, wasn’t it? I mean, co-parenting is a really serious commitment. You know how I’ve always felt that marriage is sort of meaningless? And yes, I know, that at least I *could* get married if I wanted to, and it is horrible that not everyone can do that everywhere. But my point is that having a child, being a parent with someone, to me that’s the ultimate commitment. And for Rachel to ask you to do that is wonderful, but I can see it could also be really confusing and overwhelming and hard to figure out. (beat) I have all these questions! But I am sure you will tell me what you think I should know. Also (smiles) you think *my* relationship’s been moving quickly?? Yours just entered warp speed! (short laugh) I love you:s and a baby and commitment like that! (snaps fingers) If you end up going in on all of this of course… Either way. Rachel’s family sounds wonderful, but if you do end up meeting them, it makes sense to do it in small doses at first… (pause) You’re right, I haven’t met Johnno’s parents. And he hasn’t told them, he wants to wait until we’re at that ‘magical’ 12-week-mark. Don’t know if I’ve told you but there are two sets of parents to meet. His parents are divorced, and both have new partners. Seems he has a pretty good relationship with his father, and a more distant one with his mother. I think some of it has to do with the fact that he likes his father’s new partner much better than his mother’s. Also I think he ended up taking his father’s side in the divorce, seemed sort of messy, and his mother is very bitter about the fact that his father is now living with a man. Anyway. It’s all a bit complicated, and I am sure I don’t know even close to the full story. But I will do my best to charm them once we do meet. I tried to tell Johnno we should probably try to meet them *before* telling them about the pregnancy but he’s not sure. And they’re not my parents, so I can’t push. (beat) Anyway, Still feeling good. The queasiness has abated, so almost back to normal. Apart from feeling happy, of course! (smiles) Missing smoking a lot more, though, which is to be expected, but still annoying… Talked to my mother today and tried to get her to tell me about her pregnancy – apparently a lot of the time your pregnancy mirrors your mother’s – but she was useless! She could hardly remember anything! (laughs) Fully in character, though, she’s an amazing but sort of distracted parent. Meant I could get away with some sneaky stuff in my teens, so not really complaining. But then all of a sudden she would focus on me like a laser beam and just *pull* out of me whatever silly thing I was planning. She still does it – that’s what happened when she made me tell her about the pregnancy! (laughs) So, what-
(Front door being unlocked, opening, footsteps)
JOHNNO
Hello? Kat?
KAT
In here Johnno!
JOHNNO
(kisses KAT) Hello sweetie, you messaging Jess?
KAT
I am. Say hello!
JOHNNO
Hello Jess! (to KAT) Feel a bit silly doing that. You done soon?
KAT
Yeah.
JOHNNO
All right. (starts kissing KAT’s neck)
KAT
(laughs) Hey, I’ll never finish up if you keep doing that!
JOHNNO
(jokingly sulky) Fine, sweetheart. I’ll put the kettle on. (kisses KAT, leaves)
KAT
Thanks, sweetie. (to JESS) Sending hugs – I get that this is not the easiest of situations. But, you know, whatever ends up happening, Rachel loves you and wants to be with you. That’s a great thing. Doesn’t mean you will want to be with her and raise a child with her, but it means that you are loved and appreciated. And not just by Rachel by the way! OK? And if you want to vent, or reason, or rage or whatever, I am here. I am –
JOHNNO
Tea’s ready!
KAT
Coming! (to JESS) I’d better go. Love you! Oceans of hugs!
JOHNNO
(a little annoyed) Kat-
(clicks)
Scene 20.4
OLIVIA
(tears in eyes, a bit stunned) Oh wow. Not commenting. (smiles) Again. Yeah… Some of this I know how it goes – other parts – including most details – I really really don’t. So, a lot of this? Complete surprise. Shock sometimes. (deep breath) So if *you* think it’s a bit of an emotional rollercoaster imagine what it’s like for me – my parents are in there, and other folks I know in the present, and me – I’m in there too somewhere, or the pre-me or whatever. (sighs) It’s interesting, and exciting, and it answers questions I’ve had, but it is also tough. So. Going to go for a run, I think. ‘Til next week. Please listen to this trailer.
(Trailer for Escape!)
OLIVIA
If you knew either Kat or Jess or any of their friends twenty years ago, I would like to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. The show is also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – on Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you have a minute, it would mean so much if you would rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. It can help others find the show. And a lso, it makes me very happy! If you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days! Our fantastic music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 21: MAY 22-31, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 21.1
OLIVIA
Hello there, this is Olivia and the Y2K podcast. I can’t believe it’s the end of May already – this term has certainly flown by! And now I’m right in the middle of exam season – have to make sure I pass everything first time round so I can go to New Zealand – the supplementary exams will be after I’ve left! So far I think it’s been going well, I just have two left to do. But feel free to send me good vibes, can’t hurt, right? (laughs) So last week we found out that Rachel is pregnant, Kat is still pregnant, and Johnno is being sort of… nice? Also Jess has some thinking to do. Let’s see what today’s voice mails bring. Welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 21.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hi Jess, so… You’ve been quiet for a little longer than usual. And I get it, completely. Lots to think about, huh? Let me distract you with some good news – I got a voice over job for a TV ad – not the one for washing up liquid, they didn’t want me for that. This is for cake mix. Which is sort of silly as I would never ever actually *use* cake mix, but hey, I’m an actor. I can do this. Also I tried it after the audition – wanted to make sure it wasn’t horrible – and it was actually quite tasty. So I suppose technically I *have* used cake mix now (laughs) Getting off my high horses… is it horses? Hippos? No! Hungry hippos and high horses, right? Hungry horses? Is this the kind of thing I need to know once I’m a mother? No, I’ll be speaking Swedish to the baby, and Johnno English, so the kid’ll be effortlessly bilingual, or that’s the idea anyway. So that means I need to know the Swedish kiddie songs and books and stuff, and he can do the ones in English. Right? And then we’ll bring in my mother and her Danish to really confuse the shit out of everyone… Yeah I have no clue how that will work. We’ll just have to figure it out! I am sure we will. We’ve started talking more seriously about names, and it’s hard – I don’t think much about cultural differences in our relationship, I mean, I’ve lived here for years, and we’re both from northern-ish Europe, but when it comes to names? He hates all of my choices and I hate all of his! At this rate the kid will be named Jonathan or Katarina junior because at least we don’t hate each others names… Would be horrible if we did! (laughs) We could do that American thing of having the same name but using different nickname, like Ina and… Jon? Or Than – that’s not a name! Thane? (laughs) Thane is a peculiar name. Sounds like Blaine – remember how we laughed at that name in… John Hughes film? With Molly Ringwald? What was it? I am sure you remember, so just tell me, OK? And there is still time to agree on names. Early days and all that…
(door opening softly, bare feet footsteps)
JOHNNO
(sleepy) You still up sweetheart?
KAT
Johnno! Did I wake you?
JOHNNO
No, just need a piss. (gives KAT a peck)
KAT
(softly) OK.
(during the following: sounds of footsteps, door opening, peeing, flushing, hand washing, footsteps)
KAT
(continues, to JESS) Just got home from work, thought he was asleep. I can never go straight back to sleep once I get home – well you know that! I’m too wired. Though since I got pregnant I haven’t been sleeping well at all, so I really should try to go to bed earlier… Anyway. Had a good night in the pub tonight. Worked with only Lee, and it was pretty empty, so we mainly hung around talking. He’s so funny, he has-
JOHNNO
(still a little sleepy) Talking about me again, sweetie?
KAT
Not this time. About Lee, at work.
JOHNNO
(much more awake) Funny, is he?
KAT
Yeah! He told this amazing story today, there was this-
JOHNNO
(interrupts, angry) I don’t want to hear it.
KAT
O-K?
JOHNNO
(angry, sarcastic) So you’re sitting here telling your friend Jess all about this amazing bloke Lee?
KAT
Wha-
JOHNNO
(interrupts) On my computer?
KAT
Why are you-
JOHNNO
(interrupts) While I’m asleep in the next room?
KAT
Johnno, I-
JOHNNO
(interrupts) Pregnant with my kid?
KAT
Lee’s just a friend, what-
JOHNNO
(interrupts, blindly furious with jealousy) Or is it my kid?
KAT
What the hell? Of course it’s yours! I’m turning this off now, Jess doesn’t need to hear more of this shit.
JOHNNO
Bitch.
KAT
(to JESS) Bye Jess, love you.
JOHNNO
(mimics, hatefully) ”Love yo-
(clicks)
Scene 21.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
(library ambience)
KAT
(very tired, all energy spent) Hi Jess. So sorry you had to hear that. (beat) Back at the library. Had to get out of there. We argued for hours. And then talked. And then he fell asleep but I couldn’t. Got about an hour of sleep I think. He´s just so jealous. I don’t know how to handle it. When he finally calmed down he apologized, of course. Said he didn’t mean it. Said he would never think it was (voice wavers) someone else baby. Oh Jess. (sighs) How the hell did this happen? I can’t… I can’t let him do this to me. This is not OK. He can’t say that to me. (beat) I’ve cried so much there’s nothing left. Just this empty feeling. (pause) But I understand him, too. He’s been betrayed by other girlfriends and it’s hard for him to trust me. I get it. Still doesn’t make it OK. And I think he got that. So I guess we move on. And I will get over this too. It’s just… Just… I don’t even know. Let me know what’s up with you. OK? I love you. Oceans and oceans. Bye.
(clicks)
Scene 21.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Oh fuck, Kat, how are you? Do you want me to call you? I can in emergencies, you know? Money-schmoney, all right? You are right, this is not OK. Saying that to you is not acceptable behaviour. Also, the arguments I’ve heard you two have escalate so quickly, like you’re fine, and then something sparks and it’s just – boom! You have to find a way out of there before the explosion – I mean together, you have to figure out what the triggers are and how to defuse them. Maybe Johnno needs to talk to someone about this jealousy thing? A therapist? Or couple’s therapy or something? It seems so wildly unfair that you have to deal with this when you are probably the least likely person to cheat on a partner I’ve ever met. My dear. I’m so sorry. I have to run to class but I can call you later if you want? And tell you more about what’s going on over here, nothing to worry about, much calmer on this end. Love you! Oceans of hugs!
(clicks)
Scene 21.5
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Thanks, Jess! So much. Just hearing your voice and knowing you are there and ready to call and support and.. everything means so much. And makes me feel better. And calmer. Yes. I will suggest therapy to Johnno, in whatever form makes sense to him. And… (sighs) you’re right. It always happens so quickly, I never understand what is going on until we’re all of a sudden in mid-argument. It’s OK. You don’t have to call. Let’s save it. I’m meeting Shirin for coffee. Feels good to reconnect a little. I went back home and got a few hours of sleep in, so now I feel less drained as well. Looking forward to your update – I’m glad that it’s calmer but still – lots going on, right? Love you!
(clicks)
Scene 21.6
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Kat! So good to hear you sounding a little more yourself. And say hi to Shirin for me – we’ve only e-mailed a little since I moved here, and… I miss her. There’s been so much else going on – well you of all people know that! – I haven’t really thought much about Shirin and Emma. Will e-mail them soon. Anyways. So… yeah. What’s going on over here. Well, apart from what you heard, not much. I asked Rachel for time to process, and that’s where we still stand. Me processing. And of course, Rachel gave me some more info on this whole ‘Surprise! I’m pregnant!’-thing. Still haven’t quite grasped it’s real. I mean, she’s been clear all along that she’s bi and dates both men and women. Also, we aren’t exclusive – and we definitely weren’t even close to it when this happened – so it’s not a betrayal in any way. I think we were maybe heading that way before… all this. And I would love to be a parent… someday. And possibly with Rachel. Probably with Rachel, in fact. I mean she’s fantastic and everything’s been so great between us, but… now? The timing is… We haven’t known each other long, and I’m still in school, and who knows what kind of job I will find, and where in the world I will find it. (breathes) So. Rachel had a one-off-thing with this guy Mike at the librarian conference, and didn’t think much of it. Until now, of course. She is trying to figure out how to contact him but so far no luck. It was a huge international conference with librarians from all over the country and the world, and since she doesn’t know his last name, it’s hard. So many Mike:s! (sigh) This makes me worry. What if she never finds him – what will she tell the child? Or what if he turns up suddenly and wants to be involved and make decisions and just confuses the kid? Or – worst case – what if he turns up and forms a bond with the baby and then leaves again, breaking their heart? (breathes) Ugh. Way too much uncertainty there. Though in one way it’s all perfect of course – Rachel is offering me a ready-made family, I don’t even have to be pregnant myself! You know I’ve always felt anxious about that idea. But can I just jump into this? Isn’t there supposed to be some sort of – I don’t know – *briefing* before you do this much adulting? Or a class or something?? (brief laugh) Yes I know I’m being silly. I feel overwhelmed by all these adult choices coming at me. I still feel like an irresponsible teen, for chrissakes! How am I supposed to be responsible for a kid?? Aaargh! Do you ever feel this way? About becoming a parent, I mean? You seem pretty zen about the pregnancy, I guess you mostly have to deal with making your relationship work… I have a therapy appointment tomorrow, thank goodness! Hopefully Antonio can help me sort through my feelings and thoughts about this whole… mess. Because right now I feel like I could *explode* with all these conflicting emotions and concerns and worries and – (breathes a few times to calm down)… (sighs) Anyways. It’s “Pretty in Pink” by the way. That movie with Molly Ringwald? Andrew McCarthy plays Blaine. My friend Jen had the most enormous crush on him when we were teens so we watched it like fifty times. I was crushing on Iona, she was so cool. Still am if I’m honest. Didn’t tell anyone of course. (laughs) Right, enough for now. Take care of yourself. And of the little bean. I love you! Oceans!
(clicks)
Scene 21.7
OLIVIA
Listening to this I… I feel like I’m eavesdropping, you know? I haven’t felt like that so much before but this… Yeah. Something about their feelings and thoughts about the pregnancies feels more… private than even all that horrible sex talk. (beat) So… Mike… Must be a lot of Mikes out there. (beat) I can relate a little to what Jess is saying there – not that I am anywhere near parenthood, FIRM no on that! – but the (beat) feeling like a kid when you have to make adult decisions, and feeling like there should be a rulebook or a test or something. Like when I was little, and all the way up until I started learning how to drive, I sort of thought cars magically *knew* where they were going. I mean, I saw people drive them of course, but still. I didn’t get it. (laughs) I was so shocked when I realized that *I* had to make *every* *single* *decision* to get the car from one point to the next. I had to choose lanes and keep track of exits and pick a parking spot and so on and so on… And I suppose before doing this podcast I’d been seeing my parents the same way. Like two people who magically just knew what they were doing and where they were going. And it is becoming so clear that they… that they don’t. (sighs) And neither do I. Suppose we are trying our best, at least most of the time. That should count for something, right? (beat) ‘Til next week, listeners! Please listen to this trailer.
(Trailer for The Subjective Truth)
OLIVIA
If you knew either Kat or Jess or any of their friends twenty years ago, I would like to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. The show is also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – on Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you have a minute, it would mean so much if you would rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. It can help others find the show. And a lso, it makes me very happy! If you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days! Our fantastic music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 22: JUNE 1-4, 2000
CONTENT WARNING
OLIVIA
Hello everyone, this is Olivia. I want to give you a heads up before we start – the voice mails this week contain a panic attack. Tammi’s helped me set up a resource page on the website, we tried to find as many hotlines and info-pages and support things from different corners of the world – or at least the English-speaking ones. So if you feel like you need anything like that, go to y2Kpod.com[slash]resources and hopefully you will find it there. Please take care of yourself, and if you need to, don’t be afraid to ask for help.
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 22.1
OLIVIA
(exhilarated) Hey brilliant listeners, Olivia here. I ran 10 k today and I am feeling fantastic! *This* is why I love running so much! It is such a feeling of freedom, and I can somehow think more clearly, and finish my thoughts properly. Like running gives me the headspace to really sort things out. Or to listen to podcasts, of course. But today it was just me and running. It was glorious. You should all try it! (laughs) The gospel of running according to Olivia, now weekly on the Y2K podcast! (laughs) Let’s get to the voice mails, shall we? Last week Johnno wa s jealous, Kat was tired, everyone was pregnant – well two of them anyway – and Jess was feeling like an irresponsible teen. Here we go – welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 22.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KIRSTEN
(unsure) Hej Katarina, det er mor. Jeg har ikke fået fat i dig på mobilen, så jeg prøver det her i stedet. Du kan vel sende en sms, så ringer jeg op. Du ved hvor urolig, jeg kan blive, jeg forstår, du har travlt men (worried smile) ja, du ved hvordan jeg er. Kys og kram til dig lille skat. Vi tales ved!
(clicks)
Scene 22.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hey Jess. Just got a message on here from my mother. She’s been calling and trying to text – which is hilarious because it’s either all capitals like she’s shouting at me or no spaces so I can’t make it out. The woman is an engineer and cannot conquer texting! It’s absurd! (laughs) Actually, I think there is no room in her brain for that kind of thing so she doesn’t bother learning. Anyway. That’s not what I wanted to say. I wanted to say that she left a message and I haven’t wanted to talk to her ‘cause I don’t want to say anything about Johnno and I, and I know if she gets me on the phone she’ll worm it out of me, she always does. Also (sigh) I missed mother’s day. It was this past Sunday in Sweden and I don’t usually do much, it’s not an important thing like it was in your family, but I always get in touch somehow, e-mail or call or, you know. And this time I didn’t. Yeah. I suck. I was just so wrapped in everything here. I need to call her but I don’t know what to say. (sighs) Yeah, I know. I need to do it. Will just pro-procastinate? -crastinate? One of those – a little first by talking to you… I brought up the jealousy thing with Johnno, finally. Talked to Shirin about it – she misses you! – and she said what you said – to just talk about it. Ugh. Why is that always the most obvious advice but the most difficult thing to actually do? Anyway. I’d been trying to sort it out in my head, and I tried to make it into our problem that we could work on together, so it wouldn’t be so much of an accusation. And it sort of worked, I think. Though it became a little more about me avoiding talking about men and a little less about him trying to find ways to control his jealousy than I’d have liked. He’s stressed out, too. He’s very happy about the baby, but turns out he’s really worried, too. Worried about what his parents will think, and about providing for us, and being a good father. Which makes a lot of sense. And – to answer your question – I have those fears too. Not so much about being a good mother – maybe that will come later – but about being able to handle all the responsibility of being a parent. Anyway. I think Johnno and I are in a better place. (beat) How did your therapy appointment go? Was your therapist any help sorting everything out? The timing is of course bad, but, if you want to be with Rachel, and you want to be a parent with Rachel, maybe that’s more important than the timing? You know? OK. I’m gonna go bite the bullfrog – (laughs) that’s not it! Bite the bullet? (laughs) Yeah. Call my mother. Oh! I’m recording that voiceover commercial this week and guess what? It’ll be airing in both the UK, Australia *and* New Zealand! So if you watch enough TV you could potentially hear my voice over there as well! Isn’t that wild? I love it! And remember to calm down, drop your shoulders and breeeeeathe. OK? Love you!
(clicks)
Scene 22.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Thanks Kat! I really needed that breathing reminder today! (breathes) Antonio the therapist was really helpful. He was sort of on the same page as you – I can’t do anything about the timing so why worry about it. This is happening now, whether I want it to or not. Funny thing about pregnancies. They’re so… non-negotiable. They start, and then you know at the end there will be a child to take care of. Mind-boggling really. (beat) If all goes well, of course. Rachel was spouting off all these scary miscarriage stats the other day, which freaked me out. I had no idea it was so common, especially early on. Which week are you in, Kat? Got me a little worried about you, too. (breathes, mumbles) Just breathe. Remember to breathe. (breathes) Right. I get a little freaked out.
(deep breath) The core issue is do I want Rachel *and* a child. I can’t have just Rachel anymore, they’re a package deal. And it’s just so weird that there seems no way of contacting the… ‘bio-dad’ – Rachel’s tried everything she can think of and now she’s given up, at least for now. Seems pretty unfair to him. But… what else is she supposed to do? (beat) Also – and this is selfish and silly – (beat) the child won’t have any of my genes. Ugh. Don’t like myself for that one. I don’t think I should care about that but part of me sort of does. I’m not worried at all about loving the child, and absolutely in every way being their parent, I just… (thinks) You know, when we were kids, Bri and I used to stand next to each other in front of the bathroom mirror and compare our noses, and eyes, and the shape of our ears. We can both wiggle our nostrils, and roll our tongues, so we would do that, and laugh, and… Dad would come and stand behind us and do the same, and that made me feel like we were *family*, you know? Those tiny similarities made me feel connected. And I always assumed I would have that with a kid. Not that I know *how* I thought that would happen since I’m not too keen on the idea of being pregnant myself… Yeah. Just… (shallow breathing, fighting to control emerging panic attack, crying, louder crying, on floor, panic starts to set in) Aaaaahhhh…!
(quick footsteps, JESS’ panic goes on)
BRI
(worried, muffled yell) Jess! (opens door) Jess! (kneels beside JESS, arms around her) Jess. (forces herself to be calm and controlled) Listen to me. Listen to me. I’m here. It’s going to be OK. Focus on your breathing. In (breathes slowly in) – out (breathes out) -in (breathes in) – out (breathes out) (JESS joins in, calms) -in (breathes in) – out (breathes out) -in (breathes in) – out (breathes out) Good. Keep breathing slowly. Focus on my voice. -in (breathes in) – out (breathes out) -in (breathes in) – out (breathes out) Slowly.
JESS
Oh Bri (sob)
BRI
(softly) There you are.
JESS
I- (sobs)
BRI
Shhh. Easy. Breathe.
(They breathe together)
JESS
(sits up, still on floor) Bri, I- I- crap.
BRI
You had a panic attack. It happens.
JESS
I know. But it hasn’t happened to me in… over a year.
BRI
You have a lot going on.
JESS
Yeah. I’m sorry.
BRI
Don’t be sorry. You talked me down from a pretty big ledge not long ago, remember? Trying to return some part of the favour.
JESS
You don’t owe me anything, Bri.
BRI
I know. Still.
JESS
Yeah. Still. Love you.
BRI
(voice breaks with emotion) Love you sib.
JESS
How are doing in all of this? You all right?
BRI
(emotionally) I am all right. (more composed) And stop trying to take care of *me*. You’re the one who just had a panic attack.
JESS
(small laugh) Yeah. It’s- I- (deep breath) Remember when we were kids and we used to stand in front of the mirror and compare our noses, and ears, and roll up our tongues-
BRI
(sticks out tongue and talks) Woo mean wike diss? (“You mean like this?”)
JESS
(sticks out tongue and talks) Eggsaky! (“Exactly!”)
(They laugh – and laugh-cry – for a while)
JESS
Anyways. Those little similarities, like the tongue rolling you’re still so good at, (smiles) those made me feel connected to you, and to.. Dad. And to.. Mom – we have the same ear shape, and… So many other things. I know it’s silly, but…
BRI
You’re wondering if it will matter. To you, to the kid. To Rachel?
JESS
Yeah. (beat) I feel awful.
BRI
Don’t feel awful. But also (thinks) Mom and Dad were never big on showing the love.
JESS
Definitely not.
BRI
Maybe in a more loving family, those small physical signals of connection wouldn’t be so important.
JESS
Yes. (breathes) That’s probably true. Oh Bri, I don’t know what to do.
BRI
(looking for the right words) You’ve been talking a lot about how this would play out if you said yes. (beat) What would happen if you said no?
JESS
(upset) We would… break up, and I would still see her, and… the child, ‘cause of Maia, and (breathes quickly, more shallowly) that would… (starts to panic again)
BRI
Shh. Breathe. (breathes, JESS joins. They breathe.)
JESS
(very upset) That would be horrible.
BRI
(softly) OK.
JESS
I- that’s not what I want.
BRI
(softly) So what do you want?
JESS
I want… Rachel.
BRI
All right.
JESS
(realizes) And a family with Rachel.
BRI
(softly) There you go.
JESS
(slowly) There I go. Wow. (huge sigh of relief) Where would I be without you?
BRI
Horribly self-absorbed and depressed out of your mind. (beat) As would I, for the record.
JESS
Yeah. (smiles) So glad you’re my sib.
BRI
(voice breaks with emotion) Likewise. (beat, smiles) So, am I going to be an aunt now?
JESS
(through happy tears) I think so.
(footsteps, soft knock on door)
MAIA
You two all right?
BRI
Yes, come in Maia.
(door opens)
MAIA
How are- (matter-of-factly) You’re on the floor. Comfy, is it?
BRI
Not really. Come on, sib.
(They get up, BRI helps JESS as she is still shaky)
MAIA
Want some tea? Tia’s making scones.
BRI
Sounds like the perfect thing.
JESS
Oh yes. (surprised) I’m hungry.
(They start heading out of the room, footsteps)
MAIA
So today I tried out those new enormous knitting needles – the ones as thick as my leg – and I couldn’t stop laughing, they were all over the place and my arms are way too short and the yarn was too thin and it was just…
(door closes, Maia fades out, very soft click)
Scene 22.5
OLIVIA
(shaken) I’m back. (pause) So, I cut that short, there was round 30 minutes of dead air after this. Sometimes with very faint kitchen-type sounds and voices I couldn’t make out. Thought you’d prefer to not have to sit through that. I- I don’t know what to say after that. (suddenly yawns) Sorry. Suppose I’m tired after today’s run. Also- Yeah. I’ll just go sleep. Talk to you again next week. Here’s this week’s trailer. Hope you like it!
(Trailer for Ignorance Was Bliss)
OLIVIA
If you knew either Kat or Jess or any of their friends twenty years ago, I would like to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. The show is also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – on Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you have a minute, it would mean so much if you would rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. It can help others find the show. And a lso, it makes me very happy! If you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days! Our fantastic music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 23: JUNE 5-11, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 23.1
OLIVIA
Hey! This is Olivia, and I think you know by now which podcast you’re listening to. (Laughs) If you don’t, may I suggest you start from the beginning? This is going to make so much more sense if you do! (laughs) OK. Tammi and I are leaving for New Zealand in a month, and there is still so much to do. My parents want me to come visit before I leave, and I’m trying to fit it in but it will be tight. Maybe I’ll make them come here instead and pick up all my stuff that I can’t bring with me! We’ ll see. Sorting through my things and figuring out what to pack and what to leave. It’s hard! I like my stuff. Some people don’t seem to care, but I enjoy having my books and things around me. It’s comforting. (beat) Passed all my exams, happily, and so did Tammi, so we don’t have to worry about that. Plane tickets are booked. Covered by a grant, fortunately, air travel to New Zealand is so expensive. It even covers us ‘going home for Christmas’ and back again, though maybe I won’t bother. Last Christmas was… let’s just say was not fun. Anyway. Here are this week’s voice mails. Last week Kat missed mother’s day and Jess had a panic attack. Welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 23.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Good morning Kat, just a quick message before school. So… I didn’t realize until today that I was probably still recording during the whole panic attack, and that I never turned it off. Lots going on… Yeah. But it looks like it got sent off to you, so who knows how much dead air you got. (sips coffee) Sorry about that, my dear. Actually I’m not that sorry you got to hear the panic attack, you’ve been there before and I know you can deal with that even if it’s not pleasant, but also if you heard that you also heard Bri help me figure out what I want afterwards. And it makes me happy you were “there” for that. You and Bri and Antonio together were such a support in all of this. Thank you. So much. So… I called Rachel last night, and we cried and laughed and were so very happy. She’s been in Rotorua visiting her parents for a few days, coming back tomorrow. I simply can’t wait to see her! I feel so… A-MAZING – as you would say! (laughs) Making this decision feels so *right*. Yes, all my concerns are still there, but at a basic level this is perfect for me and for us and I feel confident that we can figure all this out together. So, hey! I’m going to be a mommy too! Who’d have thought? (laughs) As long as all goes well… Yes, of course that whole thing is still worrying – even more so now I am fully on board this adventure. (sips coffe) True to form, Jess, always finding new stuff to be worried about (laughs) But today I am going to try to just enjoy this feeling of excitement and contentment and… love. So much love. Also coffee. Cheers, Kat! (sips coffee) Love you more than coffee! (laughs) Oceans of hugs!
(clicks)
Scene 23.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hey Jess! So I organized this when you were feeling down to cheer you up, but now it can be a celebration instead! I’m at the flat with Shirin and Emma – say hello!
SHIRIN
(at the same time as EMMA) Hello Jess!
EMMA
(at the same time as SHIRIN) Hey Jess!
(They ALL laugh)
KAT
So I told Emma and Shirin your amazing news, hope that was all right.
SHIRIN
You’re going to be a mum, Jess! That’s so cool!
EMMA
And a little scary! But wonderful!
SHIRIN
And Rachel sounds great.
EMMA
I can’t believe you managed to pick someone up in a library! That’s my DREAM!
KAT
Isn’t it? And a *librarian*!
EMMA
Oh yes! You managed to find the sexy librarian!
SHIRIN
Thought they were a myth!
KAT
Jess probably caught the only one.
EMMA
Yes, they’re like unicorns!
(They all laugh)
KAT
But seriously, Jess, I am so very happy for you, and for Rachel.
SHIRIN
Yes, congratulations, Jess, terrific!
EMMA
Also, Shirin and I just found out – you two – Kat and you I mean – both having babies on the way at the same time is so wild!
KAT
Isn’t it? (smiles) Never would have thought it…
SHIRIN
(carefully) But… You’re happy too, Kat, right?
KAT
Of course! Johnno and I have our issues like any other couple, but we are both so excited about the baby!
EMMA
Good. (carefully) And… he’s being nice to you?
(a little too quickly) Of course! Listen, um, I usually give Jess an update on what’s up with me, you want to do that too?
SHIRIN
(pause, then at the same time as EMMA) Absolutely, I-
EMMA
(pause, then at the same time as SHIRIN) Sure, I’ve-
(They all laugh)
KAT
Why don’t you start, Emma?
EMMA
Sure! Work is pretty much as usual, I’ve got a new assignment where I ask “the-man-on-the street” one inane question every week – I actually try to ask the *woman* on the street more often than not as they tend to have more interesting things to say, and also don’t tend to hit on me in creepy ways. (beat) And if they hit on me in non-creepy ways, that’s a win! (laughs) This week I was asking people how they felt about the whole Y2K problem six months in – the world didn’t go under, so was it all just unnecessary scare-mongering? You, know, that sort of thing.
SHIRIN
Oh, it was definitely much ado about nothing – I mean what actually happened?
EMMA
There was an alarm at a nuclear power station in Japan, that was probably the freakiest, but it turned out to be nothing. Also some dates showed up wrong, but that was harmless as far as I know.
KAT
Also I heard some ticket machines on buses in Australia stopped working. So yeah. Much ado.
EMMA
(laughs) That was pretty much the consensus of the people I spoke with as well. And apart from work – I’ve started blogging, which is fun, and got quite a few followers already. You should check it out, Jess! And, you know, still having fun being single, as per usual. Your turn, Shirin!
SHIRIN
All right, let’s see… Work is fine, but dull. As always. (sigh) I just wish I could stop doing all this admin stuff and fixing other people’s designs and start doing some more actual designing of my own. I entered this competition last week where the prize was a design internship in New York, that would be seriously cool. More realistically, I am job hunting. But there’s not much to apply for. Oh, and am back with Dave, again. Not sure what we’re doing anymore. But, you know, we seem to be happier together than apart, at least for now, so we shall see.
KAT
Hang on, you’re back with Dave? How did that happen?
(EMMA laughs a little)
SHIRIN
Well… He was miserable. And I missed him. And we have fun together, I just got… bored I suppose.
KAT
But what about… what’s-her-name?
EMMA
Donna.
SHIRIN
I like her too. But it was never supposed to be some long-term-thing, it was just fun. (beat) Could be again perhaps.
KAT
But –
SHIRIN
Oh no, I’m completely done with exclusive monogamy, Dave knows that.
EMMA
Cool.
KAT
Yeah, good, glad you worked that out. (beat) Right. Anything else you want to say to Jess before we log off?
EMMA
Miss you Jess!
SHIRIN
Yes, I miss you too! And let’s e-mail more often, yeah?
KAT
Sounds like a plan! OK, we love you Jess!
SHIRIN and EMMA
Love you!
(They all laugh)
(clicks)
Scene 23.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
(a little teary-eyed) Aw, thanks so much for doing that Kat! Made me feel almost like I was hanging out in the kitchen with you all again… And made me miss you all even more! Will try to stay on top of my e-mail game a little better… Oh, Kat, I am so happy I am just… bursting! Like a balloon (laughs) No, that doesn’t work! But I am happy. And relieved. I didn’t know what to do with myself when I thought I had to break up with Rachel. She’s so *easy* to be with. And she makes me want to be… better. When I’m with her I feel like I *am* better. It’s just the most wonderful thing and-
(soft footsteps, knock on door)
RACHEL
Jess?
JESS
Rachel! Come in!
(door opens, JESS gets up, they kiss)
RACHEL
(softly) Hello, my love.
JESS
(softly) Hey there. (louder) Sit down, say hi to Kat – you haven’t yet, right?
(JESS sits)
RACHEL
Not really. Apart from… when you and I were very much focused on other things. (RACHEL sits) Hello, Kat! I’ve heard so much about you.
JESS
And she’s sure heard a lot about you – mostly me going on about how wonderful you are.
RACHEL
(jokingly) Sure, and what a bother I am getting myself pregnant all of a sudden.
JESS
(laughs) Yeah, a little bit of that too.
RACHEL
(smiles) I can imagine. But what are friends for, right?
JESS
Listening to all your worries… and joys too! And you are a joy, you know.
RACHEL
Good. So are you my love. (beat) And Kat, I hear you’re pregnant too!
JESS
She is – life works out in funny ways sometimes. I think you two must be more or less at the same point in pregnancy.
RACHEL
Really? I was sort of late in figuring out what was going on, but the doctor says I’m probably at 8 or 9 weeks, so still early days. Hey Kat, are you having any morning sickness? Don’t know why they call it that, it’s more like all-day nausea for me. Apart from that not many pregnancy symptoms so far – my mum apparently had easy pregnancies, and so did my sisters, so hopefully I have those genes…
JESS
Yeah, fingers crossed! Oh wow. So much could go wrong Rache. (sigh) Just power through, right?
RACHEL
Yeah. Together, remember?
JESS
(smiles) Oh yes. Together. (deep breath) I- (RACHEL’s tummy rumbles, they both laugh) So, Kat, I think I need to feed the pregnant tummy-rumbler over here. Thanks again for doing a message with Emma and Shirin, that was wonderful! And take care of yourself – you probably need to go eat something too, pregnant lady! (laughs)
RACHEL
Take care Kat!
JESS
Love you! Bye!
(clicks)
Scene 23.5
OLIVIA
Right… I- I loved ‘meeting’ the flatmates properly! It’s funny how they seem so abstract when they are just talked about or leave brief messages. It’s so much more real when they’re in conversation. And they all seem pretty happy again in this one, so that’s a relief. Though with the way everything’s been going so far I- I can’t help wondering how long it will last. But what do I know. Could be sunshine and roses all the way from here… That’s it for today, here’s this week’s trailer.
(Trailer for Moonbase Theta, Out)
OLIVIA
If you knew either Kat or Jess or any of their friends twenty years ago, I would like to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. The show is also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – on Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you have a minute, it would mean so much if you would rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. It can help others find the show. And a lso, it makes me very happy! If you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days! Our fantastic music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 24: JUNE 12-18, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 24.1
OLIVIA
Hello everyone, I’m Olivia, and this is the Y2K podcast. So this week, the voice mails are quite short, I guess Kat and Jess had other things on their minds. Tammi and I are going to do a listener Q & A episode, aren’t we Tammi?
(TAMMI says something unintelligible)
OLIVIA
(laughs) Oh, c’mon Tammi, you set up a mic for yourself, what are you doing over there?
TAMMI
(shouts from other end of room, laughing) I’m sorting out the questions! Do your intro!!
OLIVIA
(smiles) All right, all right . So first, we’re going to listen to the two voice mails for this week, and then we’re going to be back to answer some questions, right, Tammi? (pause) Tammi!?
TAMMI
(bellows) I’m busy! Play the voice mails!
OLIVIA
(laughs) All right. So last week Kat got talking with Emma and Shirin, and Jess was finally happy with Rachel. Let’s see what this week brings. Welcome… to the year 2000!
Scene 24.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hey Jess, it was so nice to hear Rachel in your message – and a little less emotionally charged for both of you than last time. (smiles) I guess my pregnancy is a few weeks ahead of Rachel – maybe two? But won’t it be amazing to have babies at the same time? We won’t be in the same time zone, but that doesn’t matter, we’ll be awake at any hour with babies, right? And we can swap worries and woes and joys and.. it will be so cool. And I did have some morning sickness but it went away, so that’s good. Are you talking about names yet? I guess probably not as it’s so new for you two. We’re still stuck. I want a name that works in both Swedish and English, something a little old-fashioned but solid, you know? And he likes these long, almost French-sounding names which are really pretty, but I can’t even pronounce them in English, so how would that ever work in Swedish? Well, we have time. Are you finding out if it’s a boy or a girl? I don’t mind either way, but Johnno wants to know, so we’re going to try to find out. (beat) Oh! Completely forgot – Johnno and I are off to Sweden next week! We are visiting my mother, and celebrating midsummer with her. I’m really looking forward to it – I miss her – but am also a little apprehensive. We’ll be staying with her, and I hope she and Johnno will get along-
(front door opens)
JOHNNO
Kat? You there sweetheart?
KAT
In here!
JOHHNO
(footsteps, kisses KAT) I got this for your mum – what do you think?
KAT
Oh… Champagne? Wow!
JOHNNO
Yeah, nothing but the best, right?
KAT
B- (stops herself) That’s lovely. Just finishing this up for Jess, be out in a minute, OK?
JOHNNO
All right. Don’t be long!
(footsteps, closes door)
KAT
OK, Jess, have to go. (whispers) My mother doesn’t like champagne, I mean, she’s Danish, she drinks beer. But no use saying that, he’s so happy. (normal voice) Love you Jess!
(clicks)
Scene 24.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hi Kat, wow! Hope you have a great time at your Mom’s, say hi from me, all right? I still remember her delicious meatballs… And co- colds- (laughs) that wonderful yoghurt-y stuff that sounds like ‘coldsore’? Stop laughing at me! I know that’s wrong… (smiles) Everything’s good here, I’m off to therapy tomorrow but not sure what to talk about – I feel pretty relaxed about everything right now. For once! Bri reminded me that Sunday is Father’s day in Canada, and, you know what? Dad can just go… sulk in a corner somewhere. He and Mom had many, many chances at being decent human beings, and they failed each one, so I’m not going to mope around about this, I’m going to do something fun with Bri and Rachel and just forget about that useless old man. I’m going to be a ‘father’ now, right? So it’s my day too. (deep breath) Rant over. So, school is good, but busy as always, we’re-
MAIA
(yells, muffled) Jess, help!
(JESS opens door)
JESS
Hey Maia, what’s – OH!
(lots of boxes being dropped, opening, thousands of beads scattering everywhere, JESS and MAIA exclaim loudly)
MAIA
Shit!
JESS
I’ll help you.
(They start crawling around on the floor, picking up beads)
MAIA
(panting a little as she’s crawling around) I’m sorry – thanks – shouldn’t have brought them all at once – never learn do I – new project for Town Hall.
JESS
(panting a little as she’s crawling around) S’all right – so beads, huh? – that’s new – do we need to sort these?
MAIA
(still on floor) Nah, I’ll do it later – just get ‘em in one of the boxes – ow! – watch out! – put my knee on one.
JESS
(still on floor) Ouch, yes painful – hang on (gets up, catches her breath) I’m just gonna say bye to Kat and then I’ll help you pick all these up, right?
MAIA
(still on floor, breathless) Thanks! – (yells) Hi Kat! – Sorry!
JESS
(footsteps, back at computer, to KAT) Life with an artist is certainly never dull. (laughs)
MAIA
Hey! – heard that! (starts laughing)
JESS
So have fun in Sweden, take care of yourself, and keep your beads in their boxes!
MAIA
(still laughing) Hey!
JESS
(laughs) Love you, Kat! Oceans of hugs! (To MAIA) Right, to the rescue!
(MAIA laughs)
(clicks)
Scene 24.4
OLIVIA
So, we’re back! And now Tammi is sat across from me at her own microphone!
TAMMI
(laughs) Yeah, hi!
OLIVIA
So how are we doing this Q and A thing?
TAMMI
Right. I have a whole bunch of questions here from our Twitter and Facebook, mainly. And also from some of our fantastic Patreon supporters, of course!
OLIVIA
I still can’t believe we have those! Thank you so much!
TAMMI
Yes, *very* cool. And, we make Patreon-exclusive episodes for our wonderful patrons, you and I, don’t we?
OLIVIA
We do. Or rather, you do, and I follow along.
TAMMI
(laughs) Yes, they’re called ‘Tammi’s Takeover’ ‘cause I take over and I decide everything. (cartoon-y evil laugh) Really, it’s ‘cause you have enough work doing the regular show. They’re fun, though, one is out already, the next one will be out in about two weeks, on July 1st, and you found something quite special to include in that one, right?
OLIVIA
Yeah. So in a different folder of my mom’s laptop were some files marked ‘Drama School – Shows’. In there I found some audio of Kat and Jess doing scenes from drama school, and some outtakes. We will be including one of those in the next Patreon episode.
TAMMI
Tammi’s Takeover, episode 2!
OLIVIA
(laughs) Yes, should be fun! So if you want to listen to that, please go to (paper noise) patreon.com/y2kpod and you can support us and join in the fun!
TAMMI
And now – time for some questions.
OLIVIA
OK!
TAMMI
The first one’s from Dan, one of our wonderful patrons. He asks “What do you know now, after 23 weeks of making a podcast, that you wish you knew before you started?” Mmm, that’s interesting!
OLIVIA
(small laugh) So. Many. Things. Um, where do I start… I had no idea what I was doing, really. So, yeah, don’t accidentally record mumblings and phone calls and post them in your episodes, I suppose.
(TAMMI laughs)
OLIVIA
(continues) And that outro we recorded, I should have done that from the start instead of reading everything out every episode. Also, I… I started this podcast for me, really. Because I wanted to find out certain things. I didn’t think too much about the fact that there would be listeners, who would react and respond and have questions and opinions. I wish I had thought more about that. And, I… things would have been easier now if I had talked to my mum before starting the podcast.
TAMMI
How do you-
OLIVIA
(interrupts) Right. Next question.
TAMMI
Hm. All right. (beat) Marnie, on Twitter, asks “How did Olivia become interested in geology?”
OLIVIA
(smiles) I was always interested in rocks, really. Spent a lot of time outdoors growing up, and I was forever poking around on the ground, collecting rocks, sorting them, learning what they were called. Then when I was… eight maybe? We were on holiday and went to see these limestone caves with stalactites and stalagmites, and the guide explained how they were formed, and I was… hooked. Tried to learn everything I could after that.
TAMMI
Did you learn that trick to remember which are which?
OLIVIA
(small laugh) Yes! Stalactite has a ‘c’ in it, for ceiling, so you know they form from above.
TAMMI
(smiles) Exactly! I loved learning that. (beat) Ready for another question?
OLIVIA
Sure.
TAMMI
Shall we continue with a question from Casey, on Twitter?
OLIVIA
OK.
TAMMI
They want to know – “now that there are two pregnancies happening in the voice mails, can you at least confirm that *one* of the babies is you?” Ooooh. Good question!
OLIVIA
Right. Yeah. Um. No I can’t. I haven’t listened ahead so I don’t know exactly how this goes – of course I know when I was born and who my parents are, that’s not the issue, but… You’ll have to listen to see what happens.
TAMMI
All right. Another question from Terri on facebook, they want to ask “what made you start a podcast”.
OLIVIA
I’ve listened to *a lot* of podcasts. I listen when I’m out running – some people have music, I listen to words. (smiles) I started with Serial – I think a lot of people did – and then went on to a lot of true crime stuff, and then news and documentaries and current events – there are so many great podcasts. And this spring I’ve been getting into audio drama podcasts as well – they’re a great way to take your mind off everything that’s going on. Um. One that I’ve been listening to recently from last year is The Deca Tapes, and it is a mystery podcast written by a guy name Lex Noteboom and it’s about people who are only known as their role, for example the entertainer, or the cook. And they have a rulebook, that is only for them, and they must follow those rules all the time. And… then something happens, that shouldn’t have happened. And it makes the characters behave differently than what is expected. And as each deca tape – is released, you hear from a different member of the group, and you hear their version of the story, and how they feel about the events that transpired. What I really loved about this show was that I had so many questions, you know, going in and out of my head every time I listened to the episodes and so I’d immediately go straight to the next episode. And some of my questions would be answered, but you know like ten more questions would come in my head and I… may have stayed up all night one time… And then, another one that I’ve recently found is Civilized, it’s a group of people and they are preparing to start terraforming a world before the rest of humanity comes in and colonizes it. And… it’s just very silly along with dark humour, and after a couple of epsiodes I was able to talk to the creators of the show on Twitter and I was amazed when they said it was all completely improvised. They just start with a very short starting sentence and away they go. That is all the writing that happens for the show. And… I don’t know if you’ve seen improv Tammi, I have when I’ve been to the student bar in fresher’s week, and (whistles) improv is really difficult to do well and make your character seem believable and seamless within the world that’s been created. And that is something that the people behind Civilized do excellently. Yeah – what do you listen to Tammi?
TAMMI
A lot of pop culture pods, also, I love RPG as you know, and I just discovered actual play podcasts, where they record an RPG session and some add sound effects and music sometimes, and some people get really into character. Recently I’ve been listening to Fate and the Fable-maidens – it’s fantastic!
OLIVIA
And RPG, for those uninitiated few…?
TAMMI
TTRPG, really – Table-top Role Playing Games, of course. Like Dungeons & Dragons. Hey, we’re getting off topic. Why did you *start* a podcast?
OLIVIA
Well, I’d found the audio files, and they seemed cool… (pause)
TAMMI
And…?
OLIVIA
(uncomfortable) Well. (pause, sigh) There are things going on in my family that… Things I didn’t know. I thought if I turned this all into a podcast I would find out some things I… wanted to know.
TAMMI
(knows the answer but wants Olivia to tell the listeners) Like what?
OLIVIA
Like… No, that’s enough. Have to keep some of my secrets. (small laugh) Suffice to say that neither of my parents listen to podcasts, I don’t think they even know what a podcast *is*. (beat) Next question please!
TAMMI
All right. (beat) This is from Vincent, he says “I would like to know, what is Olivia’s life like outside of the podcast?”
OLIVIA
(smiles) Well. That’s a big question.
TAMMI
Yep.
OLIVIA
I feel like I talk about uni, and running, and, well, listening to other podcasts (small laugh)… I like to read. And you and I hang out quite a bit…
TAMMI
Yeah. We go on walks, or hikes, or watch Netflix, or just talk.
OLIVIA
(smiles) Lots of talking. And we’re bingeing Atypical right now.
TAMMI
(smiles) It’s all right. And lately we’ve done some online student union stuff, pub quizzes and the like. But I’m thinking maybe Vincent is wondering about your family, as well?
OLIVIA
Right. (beat) Well, haven’t seen them since Christmas. We talk on the phone.
TAMMI
(knows the answer but wants to know what OLIVIA will say) Are you close?
OLIVIA
Yeah, I mean… We are. (beat, clears throat)
TAMMI
OK. So, next question?
OLIVIA
Is it a quick one?
TAMMI
Think so. Rayna on Twitter wants to know if you will continue the show once you move to New Zealand.
OLIVIA
Yes, that’s quick. I will – *we* will, right Tammi? ‘Cause we’re both going to Auckland.
TAMMI
Yes we are. And the mics are coming with us. Possibly I can worm my way into the student radio there as well, we shall see.
OLIVIA
I think that’s all the questions we have time for today. Thanks Tammi!
TAMMI
Thank *you* It was fun!
OLIVIA
OK, here’s this week’s trailer. Bye!
TAMMI
Bye!
(Trailer for The Lucky Die)
OLIVIA
If you knew either Kat or Jess or any of their friends twenty years ago, I would like to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. The show is also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – on Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you have a minute, it would mean so much if you would rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. It can help others find the show. And a lso, it makes me very happy! If you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days! Our fantastic music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 25: JUNE 19-25, 2000
CONTENT WARNING
OLIVIA
Hi everyone, Olivia here. After listening to today’s voice mails I want to give you a content warning for pregnancy complications. You can read more in the episode description if you are concerned about this. We have a resource page on the website, where we have tried to list as many hotlines and info-pages and support things that we could find from different corners of the world – or at least the English-speaking ones. So if you ever feel you need any resources like that, go to y2Kpod.com/resources and hopefully you will find it there. If not, please message me and I will see if I can put it up on there. Please take care of yourself, and if you need to, don’t be afraid to reach out and ask for help.
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 25.1
OLIVIA
Hello again, I’m Olivia and once again we are heading twenty years back in time… After last week’s Q and A I got some listener reactions. Some were very encouraging, and some were a little… exasperated with me I think. (sighs) I am not trying to be mysterious. I am just trying to find the balance between what I share and what I keep private. It’s a funny thing, podcasting. Putting feelings and thoughts and opinions and bits of daily life online for anyone to listen to… And, of course, I’m putting not only my own out there, but also those of my mum and her friend. And some others as well. (smiles) It’s not like I planned it all before I started. I just found the files and got going. I’m not usually that impulsive, but… I was angry, and disappointed, and felt like I lacked information about- about, well about my family. And about… me. (beat) Let’s move onto this week’s voice mails…
So last week Jess and Maia picked up thousands of beads, and Kat and Johnno were heading for Sweden. Welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 25.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hey Jess, we’re in Sweden! I’m in my mother’s study, on her computer. She’s making meatballs and koldskål for Midsummer – koldskål’s the one you think sounds like coldsore (laughs) – it’s Danish and it is lovely. Anyway, Johnno is helping out with the cooking. So far it’s going pretty well. I realized today that Johnno is the first serious boyfriend I’ve brought over here – she’s met some of the others when she’s visited me in London, of course, and then there was the high school boyfriend, but this is a big step. Also, I’m pregnant, so it’s *really* serious, and everyone knows it, so… Yeah. She seems to like him OK. And he’s on his best behavior and trying to charm her which is good. So all round looking forward to this week. And it’ll be nice to have midsummer here for a change – remember that one year we got very drunk and made a midsummer pole and stuck it in the middle of a roundabout in Palmers Green and danced around it and I tried to teach you the frog song? (sings) Små grodorna, små grodorna…(laughs) I think this will be slightly more traditional. I actually –
(Door opens, footsteps)
JOHNNO
Open wide!
KAT
(opens mouth) Mmm! (chews) Hot! (chews, swallows) That’s perfect!
JOHNNO
Your Mum says to ask you if we need more salt?
KAT
Nope. That’s perfect. (They kiss) Thanks for helping out.
JOHNNO
Just trying to make a good impression. You done soon?
KAT
No, just got started. But won’t be very long.
JOHNNO
All right. (jokingly) But don’t leave me alone with Kirsten for too long – who knows what I’ll tell her – or what she’ll tell me? (laughs)
(footsteps during the last few words of the previous)
KIRSTEN
Tell you what?
JOHNNO
(nervous laugh) Just joking. I was saying Kat shouldn’t leave us alone too long or who knows what stories we’ll tell.
KIRSTEN
(not quite buying it) OK. (to KAT) How were the meatballs?
KAT
They were perfect! (smiles) I’ve missed your meatballs.
KIRSTEN
Not more salt?
KAT
Maybe a smidge. (beat) Oh, and come say hi to Jess, she’ll be hearing this.
KIRSTEN
(pulls up a chair, with real warmth) Hello Jessica! How are you? I’m so excited for you, I know you’ve wanted this for so long. How’s school? And are you settling in all right? Katarina tells me wonderful things about someone called Rachel? I am so happy for you! And your brother is there and-
KAT
(interrupts) Sibling. Or sister.
KIRSTEN
Sorry! (small laugh) Of course. But, Bri is there with you, right? Must be so nice to have h- her there. You know, you are always welcome here, and Rachel, and Bri. I would love to meet them both. But I get that of course you are all so very far away now and-
JOHNNO
(interrupts, feels left out) The meatballs –
KIRSTEN
Yes, (to JESS, small laugh) I’m making meatballs, Jessica. And we need to get started on the kammerjunkere. Pity you’re not here – I remember you liking both! (smiles) I’d better go. But take care of yourself, and I hope to see you again at least within the next year or so? Hugs from me, and happy Midsummer! Bye! (gets up, to KAT) Katarina, take all the time you need. (to JOHNNO) All right, Jonathan, let’s get back to work.
(KIRSTEN and JOHNNO leave, door closes, footsteps.)
KAT
(laughs) My mother sure likes you, Jess! And she is right, it would be amazing to see you at least sometime in the next year… But I guess with these two babies it is going to take a while… It was really nice doing that message for you with Shirin and Emma, but it was also a little strange – I hadn’t seen them for a while either, and we all live in the same city. I’m going to try to hang out with them more. Anyway. I’d better go help with the cooking – who knows what they’re talking about in there! Take care my dear, love you! Oceans of hugs!
(gets up from chair)
KAT
(exclaims in pain) Ow! Helve- OW! Sorry, Jess, I’m sure it’s fine. Love you! (grunts in pain)
(clicks)
Scene 25.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hi Kat, so that was a little worrying, are you all right? Rachel says she gets weird muscle aches sometimes when she changes positions, apparently it’s the muscles stretching to accommodate the growth of the baby, so maybe it was that? (beat) Right, now I’m worried, get back to me as soon as you can, all right? You know what my mind is like once it’s started spinning. (deep breath) I love you! Oceans and oceans!
(clicks)
Scene 25.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hey Jess, sorry I got you worried. I’m… I’m bleeding. It could be nothing, but we’re off to the emergency clinic to check it out. (shaky breath) I’m still hoping it’s nothing, you read all these stories… Yeah. But not looking so good. Not feeling so good either. I-
KIRSTEN
(muffled) Katarina, kommer du?
KAT
(to KIRSTEN) Kommer, mor! (to JESS) Have to go. Keep your fingers crossed, Jess. I’m scared. I love you.
(clicks)
Scene 25.5
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
(worried) Oh, Kat, I am crossing every finger and toe. I *hate* that this is happening. But, like you said, there are lots of stories out there of people bleeding and in pain in early pregnancy who then go on to have healthy happy babies. I know, ‘cause I just googled. A lot. Let’s make this one of those stories, right? Ugh. This is one of the times it really really *sucks* to be so far away. But at least your mom is there. (a little dubiously) And Johnno, of course. Don’t feel like you have to keep updating me, you have other things on your mind, but maybe get your mom to shoot me an e-mail if there’s anything to report? I love you, I love you, I love you, and I am *willing* this to go well. Oceans of hugs!
(clicks)
Scene 25.6
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Fuck. Kat. Got your mom’s e-mail. (tears well up) I am so, so sorry. This is not fair. Not fucking fair. You are my best friend and I want your life to be easy and fun, not hard and horrible like this. I want to… strew your path with roses, I guess. (slight laugh) Silly of me, I know. And roses have thorns, so doubly silly. Right. Won’t do that. All I can say is that sometimes very bad things happen to wonderful people and it’s not fair and it makes no sense. In that Stephen King book I read a while back it said something about the world having teeth, and biting you whenever it wants. This feels like one of those times. You’ve been bitten by the world’s teeth and it is awful and… it’s nonsense! *Why* you? (deep breath) Right. Will stop ranting now. Get back to me when you feel up to it. I love you so much, Kat. Sending hugs, hugs and more hugs.
(clicks)
Scene 25.7
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
(very tired, no tears left) Hi Jess. This’ll be short. Thank you for ranting. I feel… empty. I’ve cried so much there is nothing left. There’s just blood. So much blood. And pain. (in Swedish/Danish) Lort. LORT. Fucking hell. My body has to take care of this on its own now, is what they said at the clinic. They made it sound like it was a completely normal thing but this feels absolutely abnormal. It’s… grotesque. Why doesn’t anyone ever tell you about this? Apart from all the crying and the horror of not-being-pregnant-anymore it is just so physically *gruesome*. (sigh) I’d better go to the bathroom. Again. Love you, Jess. Thanks so much for being there. Hugs across all the oceans.
(clicks)
Scene 25.8
OLIVIA
(near tears) Right. That was… heavy. Wasn’t expecting that. (deep breath) Should have expected it though. What… Shit. (beat) So far from the light and impersonal voice mails I was expecting when I started this… But also… More real. (sighs) I’m not sure what else to say, so… Talk to you next week, dear listeners.
Here is today’s trailer.
(Trailer for Boston Harbour Horror/Occulting 315)
OLIVIA
If you knew either Kat or Jess or any of their friends twenty years ago, I would like to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. The show is also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – on Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you have a minute, it would mean so much if you would rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. It can help others find the show. And a lso, it makes me very happy! If you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days! Our fantastic music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 26: JUNE 26-30, 2000
CONTENT WARNING
OLIVIA
Hi everyone, Olivia here. So this week we again have a content warning for pregnancy complications. You can read more in the episode description if you are concerned about this. Also, this is not the time to skip ahead, so if you haven’t listened to last week’s episode, please go ahead and do that now. We have a resource page on the website, where we have tried to list as many hotlines, info-pages and support things we could find from different corners of the world – or at least the English-speaking ones. So if you feel you need any resources like that, please go to y2Kpod.com[slash]resources and hopefully you will find it there. Please take care of yourself, and if you need to, don’t be afraid to reach out and ask for help.
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 26.1
OLIVIA
Hello everyone, this is Olivia and the Y2K podcast. Sooo… I’ve gotten quite a few e-mails and messages since the last episode. And of course, you are all correct. Not much use keeping this a secret anymore, I was just so thrown by what happened in the voice mails… I already told you I’ll be 20 this year, and just doing basic math of course there isn’t really time for Kat to get pregnant again and give birth during the year 2000. Unless if it was a really premature birth, but… That’s not it. Rachel and Jess are my parents. Ta-da! (smiles) They still don’t know about the podcast. I know I should have told them long ago, and I have tried a few times, but, well, they have other things going on. And Kat – yes, I know her too. I didn’t realize who it was at first, I grew up calling her a different name. But she doesn’t know about the podcast either. I should e-mail her. (sighs) I will e-mail her. (beat) So… last week Kat had a miscarriage and Jess was really worried. Welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 26.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hey Kat. You still in Sweden? Your mom’s e-mail said you had some sort of follow-up today? I am so sorry. Again. Don’t know what else to say. (sad sigh) Yes I do. You know what? I was watching TV with Bri just now, Simpsons reruns, but still pretty funny, and the commercials came on, and there it was – *your* voice on that cake mix ad! It was so cool! I flew out of my chair and Bri thought I’d gone completely bananas! So you are now a worldwide success as a voicover actor! (smiles) Thought that would give you something else to think about for a change. (pause) Also I got this idea the other day. For a screenplay. I mean, I’ve had lots of ideas, but this one, I think it could be something. It’s sort of about you and me, but not really. It’s about long distance friendship, and finding your way in life, and supporting each other from afar. I’m in that stage where I’m completely gripped by the idea and all I want to do is write and write and ignore everything else. Have to start on my dissertation for real after winter break so not much time for this but… I love this idea. I think it could really be something. But, you know, ask me again when I’ve written fifty pages or so, that’s usually when I start loathing my previously brilliant plots… (sighs) Words, words, words. They’re not enough today. I want to fly over and give you the biggest of hugs. I am so sorry. I am so sorry you had a miscarriage. I want to wrap you up in pink cotton wool and protect you from all the evil in the world. Yeah, not being so realistic today…
(soft footsteps during previous)
RACHEL
(muffled) Jess? You there?
JESS
Come in love.
(RACHEL opens door. Quick peck)
RACHEL
Recording?
JESS
Yes.
RACHEL
Kat, I am so sorry. I know you probably don’t want to hear that from me, but… I am just so very sorry.
JESS
Yeah. Words are pretty inadequate.
RACHEL
They really are.
JESS
I’ve been trying to distract her with other things – you have anything to add?
RACHEL
Um… (thinks) I passed Maia outside doing the most incredible… beaded… sculpture all in shades of orange and yellow and red and just a tiny bit of blue.
JESS
Yeah! It’s the one they needed all the beads for, Kat, the ones that were all over the floor the other day. (small laugh) Maia’s making some kind of fire-woman, it’s really gorgeous.
RACHEL
Yeah, and it *sparkles* in the sunlight, did you see?
JESS
Really? Missed that – it was overcast when I saw it earlier.
RACHEL
We should take some pictures and send to Kat.
JESS
Definitely. Hey, you wanna go do that while I finish up in here?
RACHEL
Sure.
(JESS opens desk drawer, rummages, hands camera to RACHEL)
RACHEL
(continues) Thanks. See you in a bit. (gently) And bye, Kat.
(RACHEL leaves, footsteps, closes door)
JESS
So we’ll send you pictures of Maia’s latest. Took us ages to pick up all the beads the other day – luckily Bri came home and helped out too. And still finding beads in the corners! (laughs) But it really is going to be superb, it’ll be in the stairway of Town Hall which has this magnificent grand old staircase with light flooding in from above. (Beat) The biggest of hugs my dear. Take care of you – you’re the only Kat I’ve got, you know! Love you so much!
(clicks)
Scene 26.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Jess, thank you. I’m back in London, arrived a few hours ago. I had that check-up at the clinic yesterday and it’s all gone. All… gone… Fuck. And they tell you that like it’s a good thing, you know? It’s all gone, so you can try again. I don’t… I… fuck. FUCK! It’s like people telling you to get a new pet right after your cat died. Fuck, it’s like people telling you to get- to go get a new boyfriend right after he died. It’s NOT OK! Why would they say that? They say it like it’s a consolation. Yes, sure, we can try again, but I just lost my BABY! I just lost all my hopes and dreams and the fucking life I thought I would have. I – (cries) Oh Jess. Wish you were here. Johnno’s at some work thing, so it’s just me. Just me and no baby. (voice breaks) They said the baby died weeks ago, you know. That it wasn’t developing properly, and this is “nature’s way of dealing with it”. Well, I hate nature! I just want my baby! I just want my BABY (wails) I read all about how common miscarriage is but I just didn’t… I just didn’t relate it to me. Which is completely… self-involved, I guess. I mean, why wouldn’t it happen to me? It happens to so many people. All the time. And no one TALKS about it. Like it’s shameful or something. It’s not shameful, it’s just HORRIBLE. (small sad sigh) Thanks for trying to distract me. Maia’s sculpture sounds awesome. And (a little awe-struck) you heard my voice on TV, this week of all weeks… I’m a global sensation, right? Yeah. So-
(00s mobile ringtone, KAT looks at phone)
KAT
(continues) It’s Lee, better get this. (sighs) (beep) Hi boss… Yeah, I’m back… I’m- I will be OK… Tomorrow afternoon?… Sure, why not… Oh?… Really?… Are you trying to cheer me up?… (smiles) Yeah, OK… Thanks, yeah, I’d like that… OK… See you tomorrow… Thanks, Lee… Bye. (beep) (pause) So, Lee wants to promote me to bar manager. He swears it’s not just to make me feel better, that he’s been thinking about it for a while. I said yes, of course. More money — and more responsibility. But why not? More to do will be good, another way of distracting myself. (sighs) I’ll be OK, Jess, I will make myself OK. But I suppose it’ll take some time. So if you can stand my venting for a while that’d be good. I-
(Front door unlocks, KAT rushes over)
KAT
(continues) Johnno!
(They hug, and kiss. KAT sobs.)
JOHNNO
(gently) Welcome home, princess.
KAT
(voice breaks) Oh, Johnno.
JOHNNO
Sweetheart.
KAT
So glad that you’re home.
JOHNNO
Left early to see you.
KAT
Thank you sweetie.
JOHNNO
Come here, let’s sit. (they move to sit down) You all right?
KAT
No. But better now.
JOHNNO
We have tickets for Cypress Hill tonight – you up for it?
KAT
Sure. Why not. Anything for a distraction.
JOHNNO
Great. I booked us a table at Belgo Centraal.
KAT
(beat) OK, sure. Oh! Lee called, he-
JOHNNO
(suspicious) What’d he want?
KAT
He promoted me to bar manager.
JOHNNO
Oh. Did you accept?
KAT
Of course! More money!
JOHNNO
You know I have money for both of us sweetheart.
KAT
Yes, I know. But more is always good.
JOHNNO
I suppose. (beat) I don’t like you working there.
KAT
I need a job. And this is fine.
JOHNNO
Yeah. But I don’t like it.
KAT
All right. (exasperated) Well, if a better one comes along I’ll be sure to jump on that.
JOHNNO
All right. (beat) I’m going to hop in the shower, sweetie. (seductively) Want to join me?
KAT
(horrified) No! (beat) I mean, go ahead, I’ll join you another time.
JOHNNO
(kisses KAT) See you in a bit.
KAT
Yeah. (remembers, goes to computer) Hi Jess, sorry! (sound of shower) Don’t know what I was talking about. I love you!
(clicks)
Scene 26.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
EMMA
(starts leaving a voice mail completely on impulse) Oh, Kat. Lee told me what happened. I am so very sorry. You’re not answering your phone, and I get that, of course. (beat) Just wanted to see if you needed anything… Let me know, all right? Anything… And… (long pause, in Welsh) Beth yffach alla i ddweud? (pause) Oh, I’m shit at this sort of thing. (calls out) Shirin? SHIRIN? You there?
SHIRIN
(muffled yell) Yes! (coming closer) Where are you?
EMMA
(yells) My room!
SHIRIN
(opens door, a little annoyed) What?
EMMA
Help, please? I’m voice mailing Kat, and I… don’t know what to say.
SHIRIN
Why are you bothering her? We sent texts, she knows we’re here.
EMMA
(emotional) I just… It’s so horrible… she was so happy….
SHIRIN
(softens, sits down) Of course. I am very sorry about the miscarriage, Kat.
EMMA
(small gasp) Are you sure you should say that?
SHIRIN
Why not? It’s what happened. And it’s not a bad word, or something to be ashamed of.
EMMA
You’re right. Of course. But it’s so… awful.
SHIRIN
It is. And I really with it hadn’t happened, Kat. But now that it has, I hope you recover quickly, and that you feel better soon. And if we can do anything, we are here for you.
EMMA
Yes! Anything! I’m so sorry!
SHIRIN
We both are. Love you Kat.
EMMA
Love you!
(clicks)
Scene 26.5
OLIVIA
So now you know, listeners. I feel… lighter. And yes of course I know that present-day… Kat… does not have a child my age. So I knew something would happen, I just didn’t know what, or when. And when it did happen it was really shocking… Anyway. I’m going to e-mail Kat straight away, before I lose my nerve. Please stay tuned for this week’s trailer. Wish me luck!
(Trailer for Continuum Force)
OLIVIA
If you knew either Kat or Jess or any of their friends twenty years ago, I would like to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. The show is also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – on Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you have a minute, it would mean so much if you would rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. It can help others find the show. And a lso, it makes me very happy! If you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days! Our fantastic music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 27: JULY 1-9, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 27.1
OLIVIA
Hello listeners! Olivia here. Still packing and organizing for New Zealand. I thought I didn’t have that much stuff here in Birmingham, but once I started going through it I realized I had *loads*… As you know I e-mailed (slight hesitation) Kat last week and she got back to me yesterday – she has a pretty busy life so I actually expected it to take longer. She suggested we schedule a phone call for next week. Which made me a little nervous actually. I mean, I am looking forward to talking to her, but also the e-mail was very short and I don’t know how she feels about the whole thing… Maybe she’s angry? Would I be angry in her situation? I… probably would. Let’s hope she is more forgiving… Right. Moving on to this week’s voice mails. Last week Jess and Rachel admired Maia’s art, and Kat was promoted. Welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 27.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hey Jess. So I did my first shift as manager last night. It was fun, actually. Didn’t think it would be. You know bar work isn’t my favourite, but this managing business feels good. I like having an overview of what’s going on. Also turns out learning new things is a really great distraction tactic. (small laugh, then sighs) Johnno doesn’t like it, though. I know he’s jealous of Lee – which is silly of course – not only do I not even see other men but also – Lee? I was never attracted to him, and we shared a flat for over a year. Anyway. So once I have some more energy I’ll probably be looking for another job. (sighs) Still feel… empty. I AM empty. (small sob) Fuck. I keep replaying that last month of pregnancy – did I do anything wrong? Did I lift something I shouldn’t have? Or eat something? Or was I too upset or too stressed or too… something? I know it doesn’t work like that. I know it’s most likely nothing I did, but… It feels like I must have done something. And… if we *were* to try again at some point, what should I do differently? No coffee at all? Lose weight? Only eat bland food? What if we DO try again and I miscarry again? I… The thought of that is just… unbearable. How do people cope? I HATE that this is all completely beyond my control. (sigh) Johnno has this endless loop of activities planned. He always plans lots of fun stuff but this is a little much even for him. I think it’s his way of dealing with everything. Also to help me deal by distracting me, I guess. And it’s good, in a way, but I am also tired and would just like to crash on the couch sometimes, you know? And watch some silly mind-numbing TV… Instead, in the past week, we’ve been to… let’s see… three concerts, two plays, one gallery opening and… five dinners with friends. Also various drinks and lunches and… no wonder I’m exhausted. Will try to get out of whatever we’re supposed to be doing tonight, I think.
(00s mobile ringtone, KAT looks at phone)
KAT
(continues) It’s my mother, I’ll talk to her later. (beep, ringtone stops) Stop it, Jess! I know what you’re thinking, that she’s worried about me and will get even more worried if I don’t answer. I know. I know. (sigh) It’s just… It’s like- like she has a direct channel straight into my heart, so when I talk to her all the grief and the guilt and the sadness and the awful feelings surface. And that is so hard, and so *exhausting*. And I’m barely functioning, so I really need to be able to shut out those feelings most of the time, and only let them out in small doses. You know? So. Will talk to her later. Maybe after my Buffy season 1 marathon. (small laugh) I love you Jess. I hope things are good at your end, let me know, OK? I’m still here for you, no matter how exhausted and grief-stricken. Oceans of hugs!
(clicks)
Scene 27.3
JESS
Kat my dear. So wonderful to hear from you. And I am so sorry this is so damned hard. And this is not your fault. Of course it’s nothing you did. These things just happen. And they are… horrible. Sounds like you are doing what you need to do to function as well as you’re able – I hope you‘re enjoying your Buffy marathon! And congratulations on your promotion! That is great. And I get that Johnno is jealous, which is not ideal, but, you know, if you enjoy the work, maybe he should just get over it. Right? What if he gets jealous of someone at whatever new job you end up getting, are you going to keep changing jobs? (beat) Also, I completely get that it can be hard to talk to your mom right now. So maybe if you don’t feel up to it, you can e-mail or text her and explain that? Anyways. Advice section over (small laugh). Do what you need to do to feel all right in all of this. Or as all right as you can. (beat) So… I’ve been writing my screenplay. I’m probably about a quarter of the way through the first draft of the story, and I have the rest all plotted. It’s pretty good, I think. It’s almost writing itself which is a good sign. Also the characters that sort of started as you and me but with lots of details changed have now taken on a life of their own and are very distinctly *different* in so many ways, which is fascinating. It’s a story of friendship spanning ten years, and all the things that happen during that time. I think you’d enjoy it. No vampires or monsters, but, you know, has some other qualities. (laughs) Maybe once you are feeling a little less exhausted you might want to read it? No rush, I’ll probably be working on this for months on end… (pause) Yesterday was Canada Day, and Bri and I organized a celebration picnic in the park nearby. It was a bit cold – not really picnic season, which neither of us had actually thought about – it’s July, so yeah… But we bundled up and brought extra blankets for everyone. Maia and Tia were there, of course, and Rachel, and Gavin and Helena and some other people from school, and Sharon and some other ballroom dancing folks. It was really nice and relaxed and pretty much everything I wanted Bri’s birthday party to be that it wasn’t. Bri made these fantastic Brie cheese puffs and mini pizzas, and I made mulled wine for the first time ever which was very tasty. And easy! Also red which fit the Canada theme! And everyone brought wonderful things – we had potato salad and tuna sandwiches and pretzels and Pad Thai and chicken wings and sausage rolls and it was all delicious! And Gavin brought a crate of L & P which is this wonderful New Zealand soda! And then at the end Maia brought out this *enormous* chocolate cake with a Canadian flag! It was so cool! You know, I never really celebrated Canada Day in London, but having Bri here it felt so right. Celebrating us and us as a family family and our… heritage, really. And Rachel is family too now, of course, and it just felt so good.
(knock on door)
JESS
(continues) Come in!
BRI
(opens door) Hi sib.
JESS
Bri! Come in! I was just telling Kat about our picnic.
BRI
Hi Kat. It was an epic picnic.
JESS
It really was.
BRI
Like picnics in those British mystery books we used to read.
JESS
Oh, yes! Enid Blyton? Famous Five!
BRI
Yeah. Though my favourites were always the five find-outers and dog.
JESS
Buster! (laughs) I’d forgotten about those. They had wonderful picnics.
BRI
They did. You could fly over and have some leftovers, Kat.
JESS
Oh yes! That would be great. Please do that. (looks at Bri) You’re smiling very wide. Anything special?
BRI
Well. I got a job today.
JESS
That’s wonderful! Where? How? When? Where? (laughs) Tell me everything.
BRI
That café down the road – Gerrie’s? They had a sign in the window, I walked in and they hired me.
JESS
Full-time?
BRI
Yes, until school starts, and then on week-ends. The owner – Gerrie – duh! – has broken their arm, so they need full-time assistance for a while. Start tomorrow.
JESS
That’s great! Congratulations! I always thought that looked like a really nice place, but I never went inside. Now it’ll be my new hang-out, I’m sure!
BRI
(smiles) You will always be welcome.
JESS
Thank you. (smiles)
BRI
I’m going to go heat up some leftovers. Want some?
JESS
Yes please! Any Brie puffs left?
BRI
A few. I’ll get you some. Bye Kat! (leaves, door closes)
JESS
Kat, don’t know if I’ve kept you updated on this, but it took a while for Bri to get a student visa, so she hasn’t been able to work properly until now and money’s been tight. Maia and Tia have been letting her stay rent-free, so generous – and just like them of course. So this is very very good news. Also we can have a café hangout space like they have on Friends! Central Perk, right? Well we’ll have Gerrie’s! And Bri can wear a cute apron and have pretty hair like Jennifer Aniston and serve us all lattes… Or something. Well, I can dream, right? (laughs) Kat, do- (pause) Do you want me to avoid talking about Rachel and her pregnancy? I can, you know. I get that it’s probably painful to hear about, but I want to check – don’t want to avoid it if you don’t want me to. (beat) Keep finding your restful moments, whether they are in distracting TV or work or other things. I love you!
(clicks)
Scene 27.4
OLIVIA
And I am back! Wow – Friends! I’d forgotten that show existed. I only remember seeing reruns… It’s all right I suppose. Sometimes funny. But also sort of… tired and predictable. My mum made me watch Buffy the Vampire Slayer growing up – and probably none of you are surprised at that, right? (laughs) – and I like that much better. But… well it’s their thing, you know? I don’t think kids often get that excited about their parent’s pop culture obsessions. Had to find my own stuff, (jokes) be a rebel. (smiles) Though my rebellion was mainly reading science journals and studying rocks. (laughs) So wild, right? (smiles) Anyway. You know what’s next, right? Trailer time! Talk to you next week!
(Trailer for This Planet Needs A Name)
OLIVIA
If you knew either Kat or Jess or any of their friends twenty years ago, I would like to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. The show is also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – on Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you have a minute, it would mean so much if you would rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. It can help others find the show. And a lso, it makes me very happy! If you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days! Our fantastic music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 28: JULY 10-16, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 28.1
OLIVIA
Hello everyone! Olivia here… I am pre-recording this two days after the last episode, because – I am flying to New Zealand when you hear this! Very excited! So please send me good vibes for the very long flight. (beat) You’d think they would have found a way to make the flights shorter in 20 years, but, nope! They are still mind-numbingly long. At least Tammi and I won’t have to deal with a smoking section on the plane like my mum did… I mean Jess (smiles)… Some things do improve! Also… I have some news for you. I’ve talked to Kat. We had our phone call yesterday. She goes by a different name now – one you might recognize, actually. Forgot to ask her if she’d be OK with me telling you that, so let’s stay with Kat for now. (beat) I was so nervous, trying to explain all about the podcast and the voice mails and what a podcast is, and… everything. She was really nice about it. She thought it was funny, mostly. And once I sort of hesitantly reminded her of what was going on in her life at the time, she got all serious, and then… She wanted me to tell you that she thinks this story – her story from this time – should be told. And that’s all she wanted to say about it. So I suppose I have her blessing. I also asked her advice on telling my parents about it. And she thought for a while and then said to just tell them, both at once if possible. So that’s what I’m going to do. More on that after today’s voice mails. Last week Jess and her flatmates had a picnic, Bri got a job, and Kat was feeling empty but enjoyed being a manager. Here we go – welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 28.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hey Kat. A really quick message before school. Everything all right? It’s been a few days more than usual and I just want to check in. You know me (smiles) I worry. And I love you. And I wish things weren’t so hard for you. Oceans and oceans of hugs!
(clicks)
Scene 28.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hi Jess. Sorry about not responding for a while. Still caught up in Johnno’s whirlwind of activities (small laugh). It is exhausting, but I am starting to feel like I need the distraction. Whenever I am trying to relax I go down this hole, you know? Like I am sucked into all the negative thoughts and feelings and it’s all one big black hole. Then when I’m at work or out on the town with Johnno I feel… almost normal. I don’t know. Maybe I’m running away. But it feels like I need to, at least a little. (sighs) You can talk about Rachel and her… pregnancy. It hurts. It really hurts, but… I am hurting anyway, and… I want to know what is going on. It’s a strange pain. I feel so guilty, because why would it hurt that Rachel is pregnant? It makes no difference for my situation. My baby is… gone, and I should be able to simply be happy for you. And I am, of course. But it’s also so mixed up with the pain and the ‘Why me?’ and with how absolutely powerless I feel. I saw a pregnant woman on the bus yesterday and it made me want to *scream* just looking at her. (beat) Nothing to do with her, of course. All to do with me and my hopes and dreams and pain. (beat) Anyway. (pause) Johnno wants us to try again. (pause) And we probably should. I just… I just can’t face the idea. I wanted *this* baby. Trying again, if we succeed, would be *another* baby. And that… Can’t face that. Not yet. Also… I can’t even imagine having sex right now, so how would it happen? (unhappy laugh) There was so much pain and blood and horror that I don’t know when I’ll feel up for anything else happening in that area. Area? (unhappy laugh) You know what I mean. (beat) What else? Work is fine – fun even. Turns out I’m quite good at figuring out schedules and doing inventory. Who’d have thought? But still looking for another job. So far no luck. Have some auditions lined up next week, two ads and a play. We shall see what happens… (sigh) July is pretty dead audition-wise… Let me know how everything is at your end. I would love to read your screenplay – anything for distraction at this point (smiles). Tell Bri congratulations on the job, that’s great! I love you. Oceans!
(clicks)
Scene 28.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hi Shirin, how are you? I’m sorry I’ve been so bad at e-mailing. Things are moving so quickly in my life that I don’t know what you know and what you don’t. But I loved the message you and Emma left with Kat a few weeks ago. So I thought maybe we could do voicemails sometimes you and I. If you want… I’m a little stressed out. School is starting back up next week – it’s hard and fast-paced and exhilarating and I need to get going on writing my dissertation. Also… (deep breath) I’m worried about this whole becoming-a-parent thing. I want to be able to support Rachel and the baby, not just emotionally but also financially. (laughs) Essentially, I’m going to be a dad, and I have dad worries. Isn’t that weird? Or maybe not. But, you know, Rachel has a steady job so we should be fine… Regardless of whatever I end up doing. Anyways. How are you? How’s Dave? And are things getting any more interesting at work? Big kiwi hugs!
(clicks)
Scene 28.5
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
SHIRIN
Hello Jess, good to hear from you. Yes, let’s do voice mails – maybe they’ll be easier to keep up with than e-mail. Won’t keep up to the same frequency as you and Kat, though. (smiles) I’m fine. I feel a little stuck, you know. I want to move forward in my career but I don’t get the opportunity. I didn’t study graphic design for three years to never get to do anything creatively mine, you know? I’ve talked to my manager about it and he’s understanding – or pretends to be – but ‘there is nothing else available at this time’. Ugh. Frustrating. And I get good feedback on my work but I see other people move to more independent work more quickly and I don’t know why. (frustrated sigh) I am looking at other jobs but they all seem to be pretty similar to what I’m doing now. All right. Enough about work. (beat) Dave is fine. He keeps pestering me to be exclusive again, though. I don’t want to and he doesn’t seem to get it. Maybe time to break it off, but… I’m used to him, you know? (beat) Don’t worry too much about providing for your coming family. As you say, Rachel has a job, and I am sure the two of you can figure it out. Are you sure it’s not all mixed up with your own insecurities about your future career prospects? I mean, you went from acting – very low job security – to creative writing – same low job security. I know my family were trying to get me to choose something more traditional and less creative, they thought I’d have trouble getting a job in graphic design, but they’re fine about it now. Have to go – quiz night with the flatmates. Kiwi hugs from you so… Cockney hugs from me? (laughs) Bye.
(clicks)
Scene 28.6
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hi Kat, thanks for the update. I’m glad work is fun and that you are not miserable all of the time. Maybe you need the distraction and to distance yourself from your thoughts a little? Sometimes the bad stuff is too heavy and you need a break. Also… maybe it’s your turn to think about therapy? Maybe just a couple of appointments to sort through these feelings? Think about it, all right? (beat) I’ll e-mail you my screenplay – what there is so far. Oh, just saying that makes me really nervous! No-one else has seen it yet. I was going to ask Bri to read it but she is so busy with work at the café and next week school starts for her, so I’ll wait until things settle down a little. Also she still has her old name in all the university documents, so she is going around to all her professors to ask them to please use the right name and pronouns. Must be exhausting – she is such a private person and this must be like… Like coming out to stranger after stranger after stranger… Ugh. I should make her some tea and cake for when she comes home. (smiles) Don’t worry, I won’t attempt to bake, I know my limits! Maia made some delicious chocolate cake yesterday. I was–
(quick footsteps, soft knock on door)
RACHEL
Jess?
JESS
Come in Rache!
RACHEL
(excited) Look!
JESS
(gets up, quick kiss, curious) What is that?
RACHEL
It’s the baby! The check-up today turned out to be the 12-week-scan, I must have gotten them mixed up.
JESS
(taken aback) Oh! Right. I would have- I’m so sorry I missed that.
RACHEL
Me too, love. My fault – I thought it was next week.
JESS
It’s all right. (looks at ultrasound picture again) So… Um. Not sure I understand this picture.
RACHEL
(laughs) I know! Completely confusing. You should have seen my face when the sonographer started to point out a foot here and an arm there and I just thought it was all a big blurry blob… But then it started to make more sense – see, the head is there, and there’s the leg, and the tummy…
JESS
Really? Wait… (handles picture) Oh wow. (near happy tears) That’s a baby. An actual baby.
RACHEL
Yes. (near happy tears) Our baby.
JESS
Oh Rachel. I am so happy.
RACHEL
So am I. And everything looked good, she said.
JESS
That is just wonderful. You are wonderful. (They kiss)
RACHEL
So what were you up to? Writing again?
JESS
(realizes) I was talking to Kat. (sits down by computer) Sorry Kat! Didn’t mean for you to hear that. Though you did say it was all right to let you know what’s up on this front. A very blurry picture. (smiles)
RACHEL
Sorry Kat! Didn’t mean to burst in. Again. I was just so excited.
JESS
I love you Kat, take care of yourself. More another day. Bye!
RACHEL
Bye!
(clicks)
Scene 28.7
OLIVIA
And I’m back. Cannot describe how odd it is to hear my parents discussing an ultrasound picture of… me? I think I’ve actually seen that picture – it was on the fridge when I was little. And I agree – from what I can remember it is very blurry and I basically look like a black-and-white tadpole with some wiggly bits that could be limbs if you squint a little… So… they’re both here. My parents. In Birmingham. They came to help me pack, and to take care of the stuff that I can’t bring to New Zealand. I’m off to meet them right after I finish this, actually. Haven’t seen them since Christmas, so… This will be awkward. Anyway. I’m going to tell them about the podcast. I’ll let you know how it goes next week – almost two weeks away for me. (smiles) So next time I talk to you it’ll be from New Zealand! Please stay tuned for this week’s trailer.
(Trailer for Diary of a Space Archivist)
OLIVIA
If you knew either Kat or Jess or any of their friends twenty years ago, I would like to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. The show is also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – on Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you have a minute, it would mean so much if you would rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. It can help others find the show. And a lso, it makes me very happy! If you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days! Our fantastic music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 29: JULY 17-23, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 29.1
OLIVIA
Kia ora and welcome to Y2K – now from Auckland, New Zealand! I’m Olivia, back under a blanket for this one, in my room in our new student flat – Tammi and I were really lucky – we have a shared flat just the two of us! It’s small but so NICE! Much nicer than my old place in Birmingham. Think it’s quite new which is probably why. We had our intro at uni this week, and I am excited! This year is gonna be so much fun. (beat) And… I promised to tell you how it all went with my parents… I finally told them about the podcast. After we’d packed up we went to dinner at the pub down the road and… I just blurted out ‘I’ve started a podcast’. Then of course there was much confusion as I had to explain what a podcast is – can’t believe they don’t know – lots of people of all ages listen to podcasts. I think they’re just oblivious. I mean my mama – Rachel – is a librarian, and she should know all about various forms of media, or you’d think so anyway. But podcasts seem to have flown completely under the radar for her. My mum – Jess – is a novelist these days so she has more of an excuse I suppose – a little isolated from the world… But… She should know about the world in order to write about it though, shouldn’t she? Anyway. Then I told them about the voice mail files, and… they both went completely silent. For a long time. It was a little scary. (beat) Right. I’m babbling on. I’ll play today’s voice mails before I tell you the rest, I think. (beat) Last week Kat felt like she was falling into a black hole, and Jess and Rachel looked at a blurry sonogram – of me! (smiles) Here we go – welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 29.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KIRSTEN
(very worried) Hej Katarina, det er mor. Jeg er lidt bekymret for dig – du kan vel give lyd fra dig? Send en sms, så ringer jeg op. Jeg- (stops herself) OK. Kram! Hej!
(clicks)
Scene 29.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hello Jess. I am SO TIRED. This past week has been even busier. (sighs) Good for not falling down the black hole but also means I have slept much less than I should – I am so busy during the day that all the bad thoughts creep up when I try to go to sleep and then I’m awake for *hours*. (sighs) Maybe you’re right. I should find a psychologist – psychiatrist? Therapist? One of those. It’s just so expensive, and even though I make a little more at the pub now money is still scarce. Or… can I get one on the NHS? Have to check. Anyway. I’m looking for another job. Remember I did that strange job in a call center where I interviewed people in Norway about their internet habits? Maybe something like that. Though preferably not in Norwegian! That was a little too wacky. I remember the supervisor listening in on one call, and then he was like ‘Your Norwegian is great’ but he was English, so what did he know? (laughs) A call center job might be good, though. As long as I don’t have to sell anything, hate that! So looking into those kinds of jobs… I also have some theatre auditions coming up – I was trying to find new audition monologues the other day, I’m tired of the ones we worked on in drama school, I want something new, you know? Not the same old classics that every actor uses. Something where I can really show emotion. I probably need to read more new plays, don’t I? Yeah… Will get on that. I do go to a fair bit of theatre with Johnno, but he tends to pick the plays, and his taste is a little… safer than mine. The other day we went to the opening of Hamlet at Lyttleton and it was… it was good. But I feel like I know Hamlet backwards and forwards and even if they do a fresh production it’s still the same story, the same text. (sighs) Also I-
(00s mobile phone signal)
KAT
It’s my mother (beat) I’d better get it, she’s been chasing me… (click) Hej mor!
KIRSTEN (very faint)
Hej min skat! Hvordan går det?
KAT
(sighs) OK. Du jag lämnar meddelande till Jess, kan vi prata sen?
KIRSTEN (very faint)
Sæt mig på højttaler, så jeg kan sige hej!
KAT
Um, OK? (beep)
KIRSTEN
Jessica, just wanted to say hello!
KAT
And now you’ve said it…
KIRSTEN
Jessica, I’m worried about Katarina.
KAT
(mildly annoyed) You can say that directly to me you know.
KIRSTEN
I know. But you haven’t been very easy to get hold of, and I wanted to say something to Jessica.
KAT
(frustrated) OK, fine. What?
KIRSTEN
(worried but trying not to show it) Jessica, Katarina won’t talk to me, but I really hope she’s talking to you. So I want to say thank you. And if you ever want to get in touch with me you can e-mail me or find me as “Kirsten55” on this voice mail thing you are using.
KAT
(sighs) OK. Is that it?
KIRSTEN
Yes. Skal jeg ringe om en time?
KAT
OK.
KIRSTEN
Kram min skat.
KAT
Kram. (beep) Oh, Jess. Don’t know what to say. She is so worried and just wants to take care of me but I feel like I did when I was a teenager, you know? Like everything she does and says is just wrong and gets under my skin. (frustrated sound) Please don’t contact her. Everything gets blown out of all dimension – proportion, I mean – when she hears about it. Can’t deal with that. Anyway. (beat) Oh, yes! I read your screenplay! Should have started with that, but, again, very tired. I love it. It is really beautiful and nothing like what you usually see produced. I want to watch this – and I want to be in it! (smiles) So when this is optioned for millions of dollars, make sure to say you already have an actress lined up for Karen, all right? (laughs) That would be… incredible. But back to earth… What else is up at your end? Uni starts up again soon, right? Let me know. Love you!
(clicks)
Scene 29.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hi Kat. I get why your Mom is so worried. And I think you do too. So if you can, try to be a little patient with her, all right? She’s far away and just wants to make sure you’re happy. Kind of like me, really. (smiles) It’s a hard thing to know that you are unhappy and be on the other side of the world, you know? And you do know, ‘cause you’ve been worrying about me… (smiles) I’m feeling much better, though. School started this week and this semester is basically all about the dissertation. I thought I had to keep that completely separate from the screenplay, I thought they only accepted novels or short stories, but had a meeting with my supervisor today, and she says I can develop the screenplay as part of my dissertation, and write a reflective commentary alongside it. So that’s a relief! (beat) Bri also started school this week – sorry! Bri (pronounced Bree)! She changed the pronunciation, and I think it suits her so well! Though I admit I’ve been teasing her a little about Brie cheese – but we both love Brie cheese so I don’t think she minds too much. And she does make the most incredible cheese puffs, so it fits! Anyways, she says she’s been thinking about it for a while, and it seemed like a good idea to change it before she meets all these new people at university. So far she seems happy – her professors seem to have handled using the right name and pronouns pretty well and she’s already found some people to talk to. I’m glad she’s not in that weird limbo I was in my first few weeks here… guess Social Anthropology undergrad is a little less stressful than what I’m doing, which is great. Also, I have a surprise for you, check your e-mail! (smiles) I’ll say no more, but hope you’ll like it! (beat) Rachel is having a tough time of it, nausea and ligament aches and all sorts of weird symptoms. But her midwife says it’s all normal, so nothing to worry about I suppose. Just hard for her. But she’s so- she goes about her life and her work and still makes headspace to take care of me when I get worried. (deep breath) She’s wonderful. She really is. And already I can’t imagine my life without her… (smiles) You know that feeling, my dear… How are you and Johnno doing these days? Are you talking about the hard stuff or is it too painful still? And if you don’t talk to each other, maybe you could both benefit from a therapist? Separate ones, I mean, though maybe couple’s therapy would be good too. I think they are available through the NHS… (realizes) yes – the one I talked to a few years ago was on the NHS, how else could I have afforded it? You’d better check, of course… Take care of yourself, my dear. And figure out a way to get more sleep, maybe ease up on the activities for a bit? Love you!
(clicks)
Scene 29.5
OLIVIA
There! I’d been wondering when aunt Bri (pronounced Bree) changed the pronunciation of her name. (smiles) I had a hard time with who she was when she first turned up in the voice mails, the names sound so different, even though the spelling’s the same. I’m going to give her a call, actually, she lives right here in Auckland, and I know my mum’s been e-mailing asking her to keep an eye on me while I’m over here… Haven’t seen her for a few years, so looking forward to it. Right. I promised to tell you the rest of the story… So my parents and I were down the pub and I’d just explained about the voice mails. And for the first time of the whole visit, they looked at each other. Really looked. And… it’s hard to explain but it was like they were communicating without saying anything. Like all sorts of feelings flew across their faces, and they just sat there. I didn’t know what to say, so I just waited. And then mama sighed, and said… it was all right. And mum said yes, but she wished I’d asked them. And I was so relieved. (emotional pause) I- they’re separated. That’s what I found out at Christmas. (small sob) They said it was OK to tell you that. Mama said… ‘If you’re telling them the beginning of our love story you may as well tell them the end’. (voice breaks) I hate that they are separated. They’ve always been so… so loving. And so kind to each other. And they’re still kind. Maybe it would be easier if they were yelling… I don’t know! (frustrated sigh) I feel like I’m little again and all I want I s for my parents to love each other and be together. Shit. And I get that it is their business. I do. Doesn’t stop it from hurting. ‘Cause it’s my business too. Also… doesn’t stop me from hoping they’ll work it out somehow. (forces herself to regain composure) Yeah. Sorry. Now you know. (sighs) As usual, we have a trailer for you this week. Here it is.
(Trailer for A Ninth World Journal)
OLIVIA
If you knew either Kat or Jess or any of their friends twenty years ago, I would like to hear from you. Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, that’s the number two. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find more info, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. The show is also on Apple Podcasts – what used to be iTunes – on Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you have a minute, it would mean so much if you would rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. It can help others find the show. And a lso, it makes me very happy! If you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days! Our fantastic music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 30: JULY 24-31, 2000
CONTENT WARNING
OLIVIA
(still shaken up) Olivia here, with a content warning. The voice mails this week are… shocking. So this week’s content warning is for retching, implied rape and descriptions of homophobia and emotional abuse. We have a resource page on the website, where we have tried to list as many hotlines, info-pages and support things we could find from different corners of the world – or at least the English-speaking ones. So if you feel you need any resources like that, go to y2Kpod.com[slash]resources and hopefully you will find what you need. Please take care of yourself, and if you need to, don’t be afraid to reach out and ask for help.
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 30.1
OLIVIA
Hello dear listeners! Today’s been a glorious crisp winter day and we’ve had our first mini-field trip – it was brilliant! I’ve had some listener e-mails with questions about my nationality, and my accent, and how much of my life I have spent in New Zealand… And none of it’s a secret, I just… I just didn’t think it was all that… interesting. But all right (smiles), here we go. My parents and I moved to the UK when I was five. I have vague memories of living in Auckland, but most of my childhood was spent first in north London, and then in Brighton in the south of England. I got teased a lot at school because the kids thought I talked funny. Worked to get rid of the kiwi accent quickly after that! (beat) I visited New Zealand of course, growing up, but definitely not every year, maybe something like every third year or so? (takes a breath) Formally I’m a dual citizen of New Zealand and the United Kingdom. Born Kiwi, of course, like mama – Rachel. But my parents applied for dual citizenship for me when I was… ten or something? Same time as mama. They wanted to make sure I could study and work where I wanted. (pause so the following can be cut if Brexit somehow does not happen) Of course this was before Brexit – much less use for a UK passport around the EU now… (pause) Mum – Jess – already had dual citizenship from before, as her father was born in England. All right. Hope that answers some of your questions on that subject… (smiles)
I also got another listener question… About my biological father. You lot are curious, aren’t you? (smiles) Suppose it’s to be expected – I’ve put all this out there after all. And yes. My “bio-dad”. (deep breath) We never talked about him, growing up. I mean, I knew he existed, and I knew he was completely out of the picture, but… honestly I’ve found out more in these voice mails than I ever found out from my parents. I don’t think they tried to hide the information from me, they… From what I know now, (discovers this theory as she says it) I think they felt bad that they never managed to track him down. But, yeah. Part of this podcast project, and part of going through the voice mails, has been trying to find information about him. Mike. (yearning) I never knew his name before. I never asked. I’m sure they would have told me. I… would like to get in touch with him if I can. So if you know anything about him, e-mail me please? But, you know, don’t contact him for me or anything like that, most likely he knows nothing about me… Also, there must be masses of Mikes in New Zealand! Right. Time for some voice mails, don’t you think? Let’s see what they’re up to this week. Last week Jess and Bri – and me and Tammi! – started uni, and Kat’s mum was really worried about her. Welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 30.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Kat! I have news! I’m moving in with Rachel! No surprise there I guess – how else are we going to raise a baby together? But it still makes me so happy! We have to get our own place – Rachel’s in a flatshare as well and that really is not going to work with a baby – we’d drive the flatmates up the wall! And we found a place in Remuera, we’re going to look at it tomorrow and – keep your fingers crossed! – I really hope we get it! I mean Rachel has a proper job and I’m at least a full-time student, so shouldn’t be impossible… It’s a one-bed but the baby’s not going to need their own room for a while, so should be fine. Anyways. Bri (Bree) is going to stay with Maia and Tia, and they’ll probably move their study to my room. Unless Bri (Bree) switches… Oh, they’ll work it out! Anyways – did you get my e-mail? Looking forward to hearing what you think… (smiles) I have to run – I’ll get back to you tomorrow – hopefully with good news on the flat! Oceans!
(clicks)
Scene 30.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hello Jess! I’m so excited about the flat – fingers firmly crossed over here! This will be your first flat that’s not a flatshare, right? I loved sharing with you and Shirin and Emma but there’s always that sense that only your room is properly *yours* in a flatshare, you know? That everything else is just… on loan, somehow? That’s one of the things I loved about moving in with Johnno, that the whole flat feels completely ours… So happy you’re going to have that too! And I did see your e-mail but haven’t had time to read it yet – thank you so much though! I am sure I will love it! This’ll be a short message too – off to work in a minute. Still enjoying it, but looking elsewhere. Not much luck so far, though… What else? Johnno’s birthday is coming up this week and I’m trying to figure out what to do – it’s “the big 3-0” so it needs to be good. But as you know I’m a *little* financially challenged. He’s of course planned the whole thing – we’re having a party at this fancy club with basically everyone he knows, and his band is playing. Should be fun.
(footsteps, front door unlocks and opens)
KAT
(continues) But still. What should I get him?
JOHNNO
(walks in, kisses KAT) Get who, sweetie?
KAT
(laughs) You weren’t supposed to hear that! You, of course!
JOHNNO
(kisses KAT again, seductively) Oh, you don’t have to get me anything but yourself, princess…
KAT
(stands up, nervous laugh) I have to get to work, sweetie.
JOHNNO
All right. (seductively) For now…
KAT
(to JESS) Talk to you later, Jess! Oceans!
JOHNNO
What *does* that mea-
(clicks)
Scene 30.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
(upset) Oh Kat! That was awful. The flat was nice, but the landlord was… horrible. I am so *angry*! (beat) I am always so ridiculously *shocked* by homophobes. (frustrated sigh) I mean, I’ve met my share, but I think in drama school, and in our circle of friends in London, it was a pretty safe space, you know? Really, you were mostly the odd one out being all straight all the time (laughs). And I was so lucky coming here and getting to know Maia and Tia, and Rachel of course, and my fellow students of creative writing seem to be generally pretty open-minded, you know… So this has been a safe space as well. Thank God for that – it meant it was a safe space for Bri (Bree) too, and she needed it so badly… Anyways. I was not prepared for this jackass. He was fine at first, but as soon as he realized we were a couple he basically threw us out of there saying it wasn’t “for the likes of us”. Whatever the hell that means. We were both really upset – came home to ‘tea and sympathy’ with Maia just now, they are wonderful, as always. They’re putting the kettle on, I just wanted to let you know as soon as possible. I was-
(footsteps, soft knock on door)
RACHEL
(subdued) You all right, love?
JESS
Come in, my love. Just telling Kat about that disgusting man.
RACHEL
Yes. Hello Kat. (sits down on bed with JESS, small sitting-down-grunt, pause) I don’t even know what to say.
(footsteps)
MAIA
I do. He’s a fucking asshole and I hope he falls into a ditch somewhere.
JESS
Maia!
MAIA
What? He is obviously a horrible human being.
RACHEL
Maia’s right, Jess. (beat) No sympathy for that man.
JESS
No. You’re right. I’m just… easily shocked, I guess. Don’t think I’ve heard you say an unkind word about anyone before, Maia.
MAIA
Well… (sits down) This kind of thing brings out my claws and fangs. I do have them, you know.
JESS
Never doubted it (smiles).
RACHEL
You should see Maia when someone’s damaged a library book. They’re fierce!
MAIA
Not quite this fierce, though. (laughs) I just growl a little.
RACHEL
And they immediately decide to stop arguing and pay the fee.
MAIA
Well… I don’t like when people are disrespectful. Not to books, or to people.
JESS
You are wonderful, you know that?
RACHEL
You really are!
MAIA
Well, now you two are getting me all misty-eyed over here. (smiles) You’re both pretty great too, you know!
(during previous, front door being unlocked and opened, footsteps)
BRI
This a private love-fest or can I join?
JESS
(gets up) Bri (Bree)! (hugs BRI) So glad you’re here! Rachel and I had an awful day.
BRI
Sorry to hear that. What happened?
MAIA
They met this asshole landlord and-
(muffled kettle whistle from kitchen)
MAIA
Let’s move this to the kitchen. (footsteps)
RACHEL
Yes. (tries to get up) Ow! Jess? (JESS helps her up) Thanks, love.
JESS
(as they head out) You all right?
RACHEL
(smiles) It’s fine. (pants a little)
(footsteps)
BRI
(stops, calls into kitchen) Hey, sib, were you recording? Your computer’s on.
JESS
(muffled) Yeah, sorry, could you turn it off? And say bye to Kat for me?
BRI
(yells) OK. (footsteps, by computer) Hi Kat! (beat) And… bye Kat! Sorry about this. But I suppose you know why they’re so upset. Guess I’ll find out. (mutters) Now where do I… turn it off, and… Oh, OK, here-
(clicks)
Scene 30.5
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
(muffled party ambience, muffled sound of gig starting during following)
KAT
(drunk and very upset) Jess. Oh Jess. I hope this works. I’m on my mobile leaving this message – got an e-mail from the online voicemail site giving a UK number to call and- (sob) I just hope it works. I really need to talk to you. I’m at the party – Johnno’s party – it’s fine. Lots of people. I only know maybe a quarter of them. Johnno’s band is going on stage now and everyone is so excited and… I don’t think he’ll notice I’m not there. I- (drink) so I made him a bracelet. Totally his style – leather and silver – and he liked it I think but- he has a different plan. We- I- shit. I haven’t been- I haven’t wanted sex since the miscarriage. At all. The idea just makes me want to throw up. Johnno’s tried to get me interested in – you know – the foreplay stuff or whatever, but… I just… Can’t. And I want to, not only ‘cause it used to be so good, but also, you know, how else am I supposed to get pregnant again? (half-laugh half-cry) And I still feel the attraction and everything, I just- it’s like I’m in a bubble and it doesn’t reach me properly, you know? Have you ever felt like that? Probably not, right? (drinks) Fuck. I feel so alone. (sobs) Anyway. Johnno’s booked us a suite tonight. For his birthday. And I know he expects sex. I mean, of course he does. It’s his thirtiest – thirtiesh – fuck! – his birthday and he’s booked a suite and I’m his girlfriend and the miscarriage was over a month ago and – (cries, then deep breath) I don’t know what to do. (cries) Suppose I’ll just have to get so drunk I pass out. (drinks, Danish) Lort. I don’t know what else to do… (small sob) At least I know how to do that. (drinks) Love you Jess. Sorry for being so drunk and miserable.
(clicks)
Scene 30.6
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
(upset and intermittently crying) Kat! I’m so sorry! That’s horrible! Please don’t do anything you don’t want to do! I’m sure Johnno hasn’t understood how you feel about this, talk to him, right? Please! Oh God I am freaking out over here. And *don’t* get passing-out-drunk – that is dangerous in so many ways. (deep breath) I know you don’t want me to but I am *this* close to contacting you mom. Get back to me, OK? Love you so much!
(clicks)
Scene 30.7
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
(very hungover, very tired, head is throbbing, almost whispering) Morning Jess. Or, afternoon I suppose. Don’t contact my mother. Please. I am… all right. Or… Once this headache is over, I will be. Sorry for making you so worried. Still in the suite, Johnno’s gone off to a birthday brunch with his friends, said I could stay a little longer. I- I don’t actually remember what happened last night. I just tried to get as drunk as I possibly could. Turns out I can get very drunk. (winces) Well I am Swedish after all, aren’t we supposed to be champions at drinking until we pass out? (drinks water) So… I don’t remember, but… Apparently we did have sex last night. So (deep breath) I guess that’s over with. I- (retches) Sorry! (retches) Have to run! (retches)
(clicks)
Scene 30.8
OLIVIA
(shocked, near whisper) Fuck. I- this is so dark. (beat) And I am *furious*. That is rape! Fucking rape. Yeah. No. Yeah. I suppose technically she could have appeared more lucid than she was and seemingly consented but… that is revolting. How could he not have understood the state she was in? I mean, most likely he did. Makes *me* want to vomit. (beat) Bloody hell, the content warning for this is going to *epic* (unhappy laugh) I think I’m going to get Tammi to listen to this whole thing before I decide what to say. So if you’re unhappy with the content warning, it’s Tammi’s fault (small laugh) No. Of course not, it won’t be. But please do take care of yourself. We have a resource page on the website, go to y2Kpod.com[slash]resources. Right. I recorded a new outro for this episode, it’s going to sound offensively cheerful after all this I’m afraid. Sorry about that. You know what’s next, right? Trailer time. Talk to you next week.
(Trailer for Relativity)
OLIVIA
If you know anything about my biological father – Mike – please let me know, I would very much like to get in touch with him. (pause) Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find out more about the show, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. We are also on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days. I am so very happy and so grateful to our wonderful amazing patrons! We also have merch – check it out at Y2Kpod.com[slash]merch. Our amazing intro and outro music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 31: AUGUST 1-6, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 31.1
OLIVIA
Hello listeners! Tammi’s here with me today!
TAMMI
Hi Olivia! And hi, listeners, of course! (small laugh)
OLIVIA
I asked Tammi to support me today, I- I thought last week was quite tough.
TAMMI
Yeah. I listened too.
OLIVIA
Hard to know what to say, really.
TAMMI
Well. (beat) We’ve had some really mixed reactions from listeners.
OLIVIA
Yes. And thank you for reacting, and for staying with us on this journey, listeners. It can’t always be easy for you, either. But we really appreciate your feedback and support.
TAMMI
We do. Speaking of which, you have some news, right?
OLIVIA
Yes! Some of you may remember that I got a message from a listener in Wellington in one of our first episodes – Cassandra.
TAMMI
Yes – back in February. She thought she knew Jess, right?
OLIVIA
Right. Cassandra and I have e-mailed a bit after that, and she did know both of my parents, and Maia. She’s a librarian actually and worked at one of the Auckland libraries back in 2000. (excited and nervous) And… she thinks she might have a lead on finding (beat) Mike. Aaaah! So, tell the listeners what we’re doing next week, Tammi.
TAMMI
We’re going to be in Wellington and talk to Cassandra!
OLIVIA
We are! We were going anyway, as there’s a field trip starting from Wellington all of next week, so we are taking the train a few days early. Gives us a chance to explore Wellington, too! And Cassandra has agreed to talk to us ON the podcast, so you guys are going to get to hear what she has to say.
TAMMI
Yes! I just hope I can get the mics and everything to work.
OLIVIA
Thanks for all the help, Tammi. I couldn’t do it without you!
TAMMI
No problem. I am having fun. Well, most of the time. Last week’s voice mails were… no fun at all.
OLIVIA
No. But… Shall we?
TAMMI
All right.
OLIVIA
So… Last week Rachel and Jess were rejected by a homophobe landlord, and Kat got very drunk and… horrible things happened. (beat) Let’s hope things are a little better this week. You want to say it, Tammi?
TAMMI
(smiles) Of course. Welcome… to the year 2000.
Scene 31.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Kat! Are you all right? (deep breath) I am freaking out over here. Oh, and *don’t* read the audition monologue I sent! God. Didn’t think this would happen, was only trying to give you something really dramatic to work with. I’ll write you another, all right? Just throw it away, don’t read it, please! (breathes, mumbles) Fuck. I think… I think maybe you need to go away for a while. Maybe visit your mother again? Get some distance? And think? Or go stay with the flatmates for a few days? Something! I- this- (anguished) don’t let him do this to you. Please. Ugh. I have to go or I’ll be late for class. I love you. So much.
(clicks)
Scene 31.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
(tired) Don’t worry, Jess. All OK here. (lies to herself as well as to JESS) And… it wasn’t rape or anything. I was just drunk. Got the hangover from hell, though. (small joyless laugh) Never used to get that hung over. Is it an age thing? I’m only 23- well 24 soon. (beat) I did read your monologue, and it is great. Perfect for me. I love getting into all those intense emotions. (beat) Maybe you’re right that I do need a bit of a break. I’m… exhausted. It’s been- It’s a lot. Anyway. Have to go to work. Oceans of hugs!
(clicks)
Scene 31.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hi Mrs- Kirsten. Sorry! Still stuck on calling my friends’ parents Mr and Mrs… (smiles) I’m trying to be more Swedish! Danish? Anyways. It’s Jess. You said I could leave you a message, so here I am. (deep breath) I’m worried about Kat too. And things are… it’s not sounding like it’s getting better. And I suggested she go away for a bit, maybe visit you, or something else, but just to get some perspective, you know? And she seemed to think it was a good idea. So I thought maybe if you want you could talk to her about it? Thank you. So much. And I hope at some point I will be able to visit you again, and sit and talk to you in your beautiful garden. (sigh) Anyways… Kat and I usually say ‘oceans of hugs’ in the voice mails, I wanna send that to you too so – oceans of hugs!
(clicks)
Scene 31.5
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
CLAIRE
(ex-calling while drunk) Hey Jess. It’s Claire. Again. (drunken sigh) I heard all about your… ‘domestic bliss’ from Emma. A girlfriend and a baby, huh? Well good for you. (beat) Good. For. You. Not so good for me, though, right? (snort) Rose up and left me and you are on the other side of the fucking world… Did anyone tell you why she left? Well, did they? (beat) She found someone else. Some nasty piece of shit. Cheated on me. (American accent) Bee-atch. Some would say it (funny voice) ‘serves me right’… (feels guilty but doesn’t want to acknowledge it) Yeah… Said I was (different funny voice) ‘too controlling’. Yeah. Am I? (more serious) I mean, was I? Ugh. Why am I telling *you* all this? (drunken sigh) How are things in (fake NZ accent) Kiwi-land? They nice to you? (beat) Are you happy, Jess? Happier than- (pause) Course you are. O-K. Have a happy happy life, right? Cheers! (takes a swig from a beer bottle)
(clicks)
Scene 31.6
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Kat! Hope everything’s better. And yes I get worse hangovers these days too. Guess we’re not eighteen anymore (smiles)… Take care of *you*, all right? (small laugh) Pretty Woman references never really work do they? It’s that prostitution thing. (beat) Anyways. Oh! Guess who drunk-dialled me? Claire. It was… It was sad, really. And unsettling, but much less so than last time. I’ve moved on. Not completely, it still hurts, but it is healing. I think maybe she wanted to apologize but… couldn’t. She never was any good at that sort of thing. Maybe- (beat) Can’t believe I’m saying this. Maybe you should hang out with her sometime? If you want. She seems lonely. And unhappy. And you used to like each other. You could do something fun, cheer both of you up. Yeah. If you feel like it. (beat) You sure you’re all right, my dear? Still think you should consider going away somewhere for some perspective… Anyways. (beat) Rachel and I have a lead on a new apartment. It’s a one-bed in Mount Eden, and I’m not letting myself get too excited after last week’s horror story… But everyone can’t be an asshole, right? I actually made it clear in my latest e-mail that we are a couple, so if they are assholes we should find out without having to meet them, at least… Also I am slowly getting going on the theory/analysis part of my dissertation. Not even close to as much fun as the screenplay part but still interesting. I am sending you the latest screenplay version probably… tomorrow? Oh. Yeah. The audition monologue. I’m sorry. Or- I’m glad you liked it. But I think I’ll write you another one just in case. How about one where you are scared of growing old or something? If that happens to you, it will be years from now, so, yeah… (smiles) I should go. Bri (Bree) is making something deliciously cheesy for dinner, I can smell it from here (sniffs) Love you!
Scene 31.7
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hello Jess. I am sooo tired! I’ve been to one of those all-day auditions – I got called back twice which is why it took so long and then in the end I (bitterly) of course didn’t get it. ‘Cause there’s always someone else more right for the part, and they’re sorry, but thanks for taking the time, and bla-de-bla-de-bla… Won’t even tell you what it was for. All gone now… (sighs) Seems I am able to get some ads, but haven’t done any proper acting since… Shit. Since that stupid panto at Christmas. And panto only barely qualifies as acting… (sighs) Of course the ads are acting too, but… It’s different. Maybe I should just figure out something else to do? Like… Maybe… (pause) No. I’ve thought about this so many times and there is nothing else I want to do. (sighs) If only they would let me do it… Like everything else in my life I have no control over it… (beat) My mother called. She suggested I come visit her for my birthday – she’d buy the plane ticket – which is lovely but I don’t know… She also said she’d treat us to a birthday phone call which honestly is the biggest draw – to be able to actually TALK to you again, even for a short while would be… so amazing. (smiles) I should go, right? Next week Johnno and I are visiting both of his parents – sets of parents – in Devon, so I could probably use a rest after that. I’ll talk to him, see if he’s OK with me going ho- to Sweden for a few days. OK. Time to go sleep. Fingers crossed the new apartment works out – I am so sorry about that awful landlord. And how is Bri (Bree) settling in at uni? I love you. Oceans!
Scene 31.8
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
OLIVIA
Hello, we’re back.
TAMMI
We are. And that was… pretty much all right.
OLIVIA
Yeah. Or… no. Kat still doesn’t seem to be OK. At all.
TAMMI
You’re right. Well you know she’s OK in the now, at least.
OLIVIA
True. (smiles) Easy to forget it was so long ago.
TAMMI
Yes. Maybe you should ask her to be on the podcast sometime?
OLIVIA
Maybe. She might want to, I suppose. Though people may advise her against it. I will ask.
TAMMI
Good. Anything else?
OLIVIA
No, that’s all for today. Next week we’ll be recording in Wellington, so, um, see you there!
TAMMI
Hear you there? (BOTH laugh)
OLIVIA
Right. Bye!
TAMMI
Bye!
(Trailer for Witchever Path)
OLIVIA
If you know anything about my biological father – Mike – please let me know, I would very much like to get in touch with him. (pause) Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find out more about the show, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. We are also on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days. I am so very happy and so grateful to our wonderful amazing patrons! We also have merch – check it out at Y2Kpod.com[slash]merch. Our amazing intro and outro music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 32: AUGUST 7-13, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 32.1
(new ambience – slight kitchen echo)
OLIVIA
Hello listeners, this is the Y2K podcast – from Wellington!
(CASSANDRA and TAMMI laugh)
OLIVIA
(continues) Today we are visiting one of our listeners – hello Cassandra!
CASSANDRA
(a little nervous but mostly excited) Hello! (smiles) Call me Cassie, please.
OLIVIA
Thanks! And thanks for inviting us! Tammi is here, of course, fiddling with tech stuff.
TAMMI
(a little distant) Hi!
OLIVIA
Everything OK?
TAMMI
(a little distant)) Hang on… (click, sound quality changes) Yes!
OLIVIA
Great. (beat) So, the reason we are here, in Cassie’s kitchen, is that you have some things to tell us, right?
CASSANDRA
Yes. I- (beat) Where do you want me to start?
OLIVIA
Um… why don’t you start with your first e-mail to me?
CASSANDRA
All right. So I started listening to the podcast – my friend got me into it actually – Hi Kate! – and I thought I recognized Jess’ voice. (mic bump) Wasn’t sure, but e-mailed you. And then, of course, Rachel and Maia turned up more in the voice mails and I used to know them both fairly well. You see, (mic bump) we worked in different libraries, but all the Auckland librarians would meet up every now and then, and of course we were always sending books between the libraries and- (mic bump)
TAMMI
(a little distant)) I’m sorry Cassie, you’re going to have to watch those hands!
CASSANDRA
(laughs) Sorry!
OLIVIA
(smiles) I do that too! I talk with my hands!
CASSANDRA
(smiles) I’ll sit on them!
(TAMMI and OLIVIA laugh)
TAMMI
(a little distant) That’s all right. Just watch the mic.
CASSANDRA
All right!
OLIVIA
So… You are a librarian too.
CASSANDRA
Library assistant at that time, but yes. Got my degree now.
OLIVIA
And you and I e-mailed back and forth for a bit. I asked if you knew anything about my bio-dad before I talked about it on the podcast.
CASSANDRA
Yes. I thought that was exciting, actually. To be ‘in the know’ before the other listeners (smiles). So, I was at the conference where I, um, gosh, um- (doesn’t know how to continue)
OLIVIA
Where I was conceived? (mini laugh) Now THAT is a weird thing to say. And think about… Go ahead, Cassie.
CASSANDRA
(smiles) Yeah. I was at the conference, it’s an enormous yearly thing, always heaps of people from all over. (mic bump) Sorry! Suppose I remember this one in particular ‘cause it was my first one ever. Rachel – your mum-
OLIVIA
Mama. Yes.
CASSANDRA
Of course! Rachel and some others were showing me the ropes, and I was basically following them around everywhere. On the first night, we got talking to some Aussies at the hotel bar-
OLIVIA
(surprised) Aussies? Right. (smiles) You know, maybe we should continue this after today’s voice mails – is that all right, Cassie?
CASSANDRA
‘Course.
OLIVIA
Thanks. So, let’s see what today’s voice mails bring. Last week Jess and Rachel had hopes for a new flat, and Kat was exhausted. Tammi, can we all listen?
TAMMI
(a little distant) Yup. All set.
OLIVIA
Great. So, welcome-
CASSANDRA
Oh, can I say it?
OLIVIA
(smiles) Absolutely!
CASSANDRA
(excited) Welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 32.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hi Kat, how are things on your side of the world? We are in full winter here and it is fine – more or less like London winter… But this season switch thing is somehow feeling much more… unfair this time of year (laughs) Anyways. Hope the weather is good for your trip to Devon. It’s funny – Rachel and I are going to Rotorua this week-end to visit her family. Weird how things get all parallel sometimes. We were supposed to go ages ago, but, you know, stuff happened. I did meet her sister Nicola a few weeks ago when she was up here for work, and she was really nice, so I’m feeling a little less anxious about meeting everyone. Also Rachel has promised to stagger the meets and greets so I don’t have to see everyone all at once. I’m sure it will be fine. They seem like really kind and relaxed people. (deep breath) Only thing is we are borrowing a car and driving down and Rachel was supposed to drive but she is so nauseous and has such ligament pain that she asked me to do it. I said yes, of course, haven’t driven in forever but I usually don’t mind driving – and then today I realized I’d have to drive on the left side of the road and that freaks me out. Never drove in London – never came up – and here I haven’t had to either. So I have my license but… guess I haven’t driven a car for… more than five years. I- (breathes)
(slow footsteps during previous)
RACHEL
Jess?
JESS
(opens door, peck, helps Rachel sit down) Rache, you all right?
RACHEL
Yeah. Just the hips. (smiles) I sound like I’m 90!
JESS
(smiles) You’re not, just pregnant. You want anything?
RACHEL
I’m fine. (dangles car keys) Got the car keys from Annie, she says we can keep it ‘til Monday.
JESS
(uncertain) Yeah. Right.
RACHEL
What’s up, love?
JESS
(smiles, pause) Nothing. Oh, I’m recording for Kat, haven’t told her yet what we did yesterday.
RACHEL
Hello Kat! You want me to tell her?
JESS
(smiles) Please.
RACHEL
We signed the lease for our new apartment!
JESS
We did! And it is wonderful!
RACHEL
It is pretty nice.
JESS
And we move in September, so time to start packing! I don’t have that much stuff, but you have a bit.
RACHEL
Yes. You might have to help me with the heavy stuff, love-
JESS
Of course! And Bri (Bree) has offered to help too, and Maia, and Tia, and so many others. We’ll be fine.
RACHEL
We will. (yawns) Think I’ll have an early night my love – do you mind?
JESS
Of course not! Let me just finish this.
RACHEL
Perfect. I’ll go brush my teeth.
(JESS helps RACHEL up, quick kiss, RACHEL leaves)
JESS
(to KAT) Better wrap this up. (lowers voice) She has this incredible calming effect on me. Right before she walked in I was feeling all panicky about driving and then I look at her and know she’ll be with me and I am all OK again… I love that. I love her so much. Let me know how your week-end plans are shaping up. (laughs) At least I know you won’t be driving! Are you ever getting a driver’s license? (smiles) Anyways, take care my dear. Love you! Oceans!
(clicks)
Scene 32.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hey Jess, congratulations on the apartment! So glad it worked out. So you and Rachel are going to be busy bees these next few weeks. Wait! Bees? Ants? In Swedish it’s ‘diligent ants’… No. Bees is right. Sorry. Johnno and I are heading to Devon tomorrow, and no-one is driving, we are being civilized and taking the train (smiles). If I keep living in big cities I will probably never get a driver’s license. There’s no point. (beat) I’m… nervous about meeting Johnno’s parents. Well, mainly his mother. They don’t get on very well. We’re staying one night with each parent, which seems very fair and equal and all that but not so comfortable. Starting with his father, thankfully, who lives in Exeter. Then on to Exmouth, which is where Johnno grew up. He doesn’t have much of an accent, though, he says he tried to get rid of it once he moved to London. Pity really. I like the regional accents (laughs) Well you know that. Oh! I just realized I don’t know what to call his parents. Is it Mr and Mrs like you always call that generation or can I use their first names like I would in Sweden? I have to-
(footsteps during previous)
JOHNNO
Kat?
KAT
Come in, Johnno!
(door opens)
JOHNNO
Do you know where- Oh! (a little annoyed) You’re recording?
KAT (same time as JOHNNO)
Yes! I wanted to ask you-
JOHNNO (same time as KAT)
Where is the whisk?
KAT
Um, think I put it in the third drawer.
JOHNNO
(behind KAT, kisses her neck) Now why would you do a silly thing like that? (kisses KAT) You know they go in the first drawer. (deeper kiss, with a peck as an endpoint) (seductive and threatening) Naughty girl.
KAT
(strained smile) Yeah… I was going to ask you something.
JOHNNO
Be quick about it sweetheart! Have to get back to my pancake batter.
KAT
(beat) Um, no, flew out of my head. You do your pancakes.
JOHNNO
(kisses KAT) Come help me in the kitchen, yeah?
KAT
OK. Be right out, sweetie. (JOHNNO leaves, footsteps ) Jess… I have no idea what I was saying. Hope your driving goes well, and that you have fun in Rotorua – did I say that right? Such a beautiful name for a place! Rachel’s family seem lovely. Wish me luck for Devon! Oceans of hugs!
(clicks)
Scene 32.4
OLIVIA
Hello again, we’re back. Still in Cassie’s kitchen in Wellington. (laughs) Cassie just waved – I’m not sure the listeners are going to pick up on that!
(TAMMI laughs)
CASSANDRA
(laughs) Right! Course not!
OLIVIA
We were talking about- oh, sorry! Do you want to say anything about the voice mails we just heard, Cassie?
CASSANDRA
Um… Really excited I got to hear them before anyone else. (beat) That Johnno is a right asshole, though, isn’t he?
TAMMI
(a little distant) Oh yes.
OLIVIA
It’s insidious. A lot of what he does seems all right, and then you think… Wait! That wasn’t OK at all.
TAMMI
(a little distant) The rape was not so subtle, though.
OLIVIA
No. (disgusted sigh) It really wasn’t. But even that was only implied from Kat. So still a *little* ambiguous.
CASSANDRA
That was horrible. Seems she’s put it out of her mind afterwards, though.
OLIVIA
Yeah. (beat) Time to get back to your story, I think. Where were we? Oh yes! Hotel bar.
CASSANDRA
Yes. Right. So we were talking to some Aussies at the hotel bar on the first night. They were from a few different places – let’s see… Sydney, Melbourne, Adelaide and some other cities I can’t remember. Not sure that they were all Aussies, come to think of it, maybe some of them were Kiwis… I talked mostly to two lovely women from Sydney, Charlene and… um… can’t think of her name…
OLIVIA
Right. And… Rachel?
CASSANDRA
Yes, of course! Rachel talked to this Mike – that must be your bio-dad! – and his friend… Henry maybe?
OLIVIA
And were they Aussie too?
CASSANDRA
I think so. As I said, the group was probably a little from all over, but I’m pretty sure Mike was Australian.
OLIVIA
But… from the voice mails it seems Jess at least thinks he’s from here, from New Zealand. Why would- Oh! (laughs) Mama never did have an ear for accents. She’s always confused when we’re watching movies and mum and I talk about where people’s accents are from and how they don’t match…
CASSANDRA
(small laugh) That makes sense. (beat) And I think maybe they didn’t do all that much talking in the end. Rachel and Mike left the bar together quite early on.
OLIVIA
Right. (smiles) Not sure I want to know much more about that bit… (clears throat) So, anything else you remember from the conference?
CASSANDRA
Um… Not really. Don’t think I saw Mike after that first night, and Rachel was just her usual happy self.
OLIVIA
And you haven’t seen him at other conferences, later?
CASSANDRA
No. Not that I recall. And I’ve attended that same conference many times. Bit odd, really…
OLIVIA
(emotional but tries to hide it) What did… what did Mike look like?
CASSANDRA
(smiles) Oh, he was a looker! Brown hair, dimples, great smile! (beat, just realizes this) You look a little like him you know.
OLIVIA
(excited and a little embarassed) Oh. Wow. (beat) I only have one dimple, though.
CASSANDRA
Yeah. Maybe he did too? Not sure…
OLIVIA
(voice wavers a little) So, is there anything you can do to help me find him?
CASSANDRA
I think so. I’ve e-mailed Charlene in Sydney – I’ve met her many times over the years – and she’s agreed to help out. She didn’t remember Mike, but she is sending out the word to her colleagues and she’s sure we’ll be able to track him down.
OLIVIA
That is great, thank you so much!
CASSANDRA
Oh, no worries. Happy to help. I’ll let you know as soon as we find something.
OLIVIA
Thank you. And thanks for letting us record in your kitchen!
CASSANDRA
My pleasure. So what are you getting up to in Wellington?
TAMMI
(a little distant) We’re going to explore the city, and then our field trip starts on Monday. We’re going to (slight hesitation) Wairau Bar, on the South Island.
CASSANDRA
Sounds great – have fun!
OLIVIA
We will! Guess we’re done for today, bye listeners!
CASSANDRA and TAMMI
Bye!
OLIVIA
If you know anything about my biological father – Mike – please let me know, I would very much like to get in touch with him. (pause) Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find out more about the show, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. We are also on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days. I am so very happy and so grateful to our wonderful amazing patrons! We also have merch – check it out at Y2Kpod.com[slash]merch. Our amazing intro and outro music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 33: AUGUST 14-20, 2000
CONTENT WARNING
(new ambience – in caravan)
OLIVIA
(subdued) Hello! Olivia here. This week we have a content warning for domestic violence. We have a resource page on the website, where we have tried to list as many hotlines, info-pages and support things we could find. So if you feel you need any resources like that, please go to y2Kpod.com[slash]resources and hopefully you will find it there. Please take care of yourself, and if you need to, don’t be afraid to reach out and ask for help.
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 33.1
(caravan ambience)
OLIVIA
Hello, welcome to the Y2K podcast – still not back in Auckland. The field trip is in full swing, and I’m under a blanket in a caravan near Cloudy Bay, on the South Island. Made Tammi and our new friends Kai and Holly go for a walk so I could record… This trip has been incredible. I have learned so much I can’t even begin to summarize it… And we’ve got to know our new classmates better too – kinda hard not to when you share a tiny caravan! We’re going back to Auckland tomorrow, and I’ll be sad to leave this beautiful place but also excited to get on with all the coursework. (laughs) Yes I am a nerd and I love learning. But you all knew that, right? Anyway. Last week, both Jess and Kat were heading to meet their partners’ parents, and Tammi and I met Cassandra and got some more info on my bio-dad. Mike. (hesitant but joyful) Cassie described him and apparently I look a little like him. Oh, listeners, I really would like to find him. (beat) We shall see what Cassie and her friend Charlene come up with. (smiles) But for now, let’s see what happens in today’s voice mails. Welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 33.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hey Jess. Just got back from Devon. It wasn’t as bad as I feared. Johnno’s father is really nice, if a little eccentric, and his husband was lovely. They were happy for me to call them by their first names, Richard and Sam. They live in a small house on the outskirts of Exeter and have the most amazing garden. A really English garden, like you see in pictures, but very small to match the house. We had dinner in the garden and it was beautiful. I wanted to take a picture to send to my mother, but I hadn’t brought my camera so I’ll just have to describe it to her. Johnno’s father – Richard – he is an artist in his spare time and the house is packed with his paintings from floor to ceiling, exploding with colours . Not so restful but interesting. Anyway. Then we went to Exmouth to see Johnno’s mother and her husband. It was… very tense. They live in one of those houses that is very narrow and is squeezed in with the houses next door – looks very British to me, but maybe they have them all over. We stayed in the attic room, which used to be Johnno’s growing up. I could see the sea from the skylight – so beautiful. Exmouth is a really pretty little town, and the beach is lovely. We didn’t go swimming, though, not enough time. We had dinner Saturday night, and then watched TV, and took a walk and had a pub lunch Sunday morning, and then we had to catch the train to go back, thankfully. It wasn’t that they were unfriendly really, it was just that there was SO MUCH TENSION and I could FEEL her vibrating with anger, or whatever other emotion was happening, but she said nothing. Or, said nothing about whatever she was feeling, I mean. She said plenty of things about the weather… Is this what they call the ‘stiff upper lip’? People always say Brits are so reserved but I’ve found most really warm and friendly so I have never really understood that… (laugh) Why am I asking you? You’re not British either! Anyway. It was not the easiest of week-ends but we made it through without any shouting which I think was a win. And I think Richard and Sam liked me, at least, so that’s a start… How was your ‘in-laws’ visit? And how was the drive? Not too stressful I hope. I’m heading to Sweden next week, so we can have our birthday phone call! Johnno wasn’t thrilled about me go ing away, so I’m only going for three days, but should still be good. And I’ll get to talk to you! Cannot wait! (beat) I should get going, it’s late here. Good night my dear! Oceans of hugs!
(clicks)
Scene 33.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hey Kat, so good to hear your week-end was better than expected! So was mine, actually! The driving was all right, once I got used to it, and Rachel of course knew the way perfectly so I didn’t have to navigate. Then we got there and I was so nervous! Also Rachel had warned me extensively about the smell – Rotorua smells weird because of geothermal something-or-other – but it was fine, and I got used to it very quickly. Anyways. I met her parents first, and we had dinner, and they really are wonderful. I completely see why Rachel is so kind and… so… secure I guess. She has this calm about her, like she just knows she is loved and everything will be all right, and I… part of that is probably her being her own wonderful self but also I see where it is coming from. Her parents are so loving and supportive and… warm. Everything mine are not. (near tears) And everything I want us to be to this kid. Who will have no grandparents from my side, of course, but Rachel’s family is so numerous that I hope they will make up for it… Unless Mike turns up. But doesn’t seem likely at this point – there is simply no trace of him, apparently. Which is both a relief and a worry. I want this child to have everything – including a connection with their biological father, if possible. But I also don’t want them to have a father who will not take the responsibility seriously, so… He’s an unknown factor, and you know how well I deal with the unknown… (laughs) Anyways. I am getting off topic. We had dinner with Rachel’s parents and were supposed to meet the rest of the family the next day, but her sister Nicola – who I’d met before – accidentally on purpose dropped by to borrow some milk, and then her other sister Deborah came by to sort out details for an upcoming babysitting thing, and then all of a sudden almost every one of Rachel’s relatives were gathered in that small kitchen and I didn’t even have time to get anxious because they just appeared and they were interested in me but not in a demanding way, you know? They were just warm and friendly and… accepting, without making a fuss about it. Like of course Rachel is pregnant by some random person and is raising the kid with this new girlfriend from Canada who is a student and will probably leech off Rachel’s salary, that’s all cool. It was… incredible. (near tears) And it went on like that, I think in the end I’d met everyone – from kindly grandmother to wailing baby, and they were all wonderful. Well not the wailing baby, but the poor thing had colic, so it wasn’t their fault. Don’t think Rachel realizes how lucky she is. I tried to tell her, and of course she gets it intellectually, but not sure she-
(footsteps during previous)
BRI
(knocks on door) Jess?
JESS
Come in Bri (Bree)!
BRI
Tia’s going to- Hey, you all right?
JESS
I’m fine. (small sniff) Just telling Kat about Rachel’s family.
BRI
Right. Hi Kat! (beat, sits down) They do sound great.
JESS
They really are. (near tears) They want you to come too, next time. Nicola said you’re going to be like their sister, too, since you’ll all be the baby’s aunties, and they want to meet you.
BRI
(touched) That is nice. I would love to meet them.
JESS
And I’m just sitting here, thinking about our parents and… (small sob)
BRI
Hey, hey, it’s all right… Shhh… It’s all right.
JESS
(calmer) Yeah. I think it will be all right. We will make it all right.
BRI
Yes we will. With an army of aunties.
JESS
(laughs) Perfect! (smiles) Love you, sib.
BRI
(smiles) Love you.
JESS
(smiles) You came in here to ask something, I think?
BRI
Yeah. We’re going to play Carcassone, you want in?
JESS
Sure! Can I be blue?
BRI
I’ll go check. (gets up) Bye Kat!
JESS
Thanks! (to KAT) I’m off to play board games, apparently. I’m glad you’re going to your mom’s. And not only ‘cause of the phone call, though – YAY! – but also because I think you do need a break, and I think you and your mom need some time to talk. I know you think she worries too much, but, you know, maybe she has reasons to be worried. All right?
BRI
(distant) We’re all set up, Jess! You’re green!
JESS
(to BRI) All right! Coming! (to KAT) Love you! Bye!
(clicks)
Scene 33.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
(on mobile phone, outside)
KAT
(joyfully screaming) JESS! I GOT A PART IN EASTENDERS!! They just called me and I had to let you know right away! It’s tiny, of course, but I AM SO EXCITED! (to someone else) Oh, shit! Sorry! (laughs, lower) Shit! Think I scared an old man walking by. It’s a one-off, but I have lines and everything! It is finally my turn! They chose ME! Not any of the others – ME! I feel like singing and dancing for joy! (hums Eastenders theme) I am going to be in Albert Square! (unlocks door, inside apartment building, walks up stairs during following) I will play an eastern European woman being mistreated by some thug – not incredibly inspiring, but some definite misery to work with… I am so excited! OK, I’m almost home, I’ll leave a longer message later. Love you! (click, but phone doesn’t hang up, KAT opens door) Johnno?
JOHNNO
(yells, a little distant) In here, sweetie!
KAT
(footsteps, puts phone on table, excited) Guess what happened?
JOHNNO
I-
KAT
(interrupts) Oh, you’ll never guess! I got a part in Eastenders!!
JOHNNO
(kisses KAT) That is wonderful sweetheart! (KAT laughs) Was it the Russian slag?
KAT
(a little taken aback but still so excited that it doesn’t quite register) She’s not a slag! She’s a woman from Eastern Europe somewhere who’s been treated horribly.
JOHNNO
(laughs) All right, whatever you say sweetheart. (kisses KAT) Well done.
KAT
Thanks sweetie. I can’t wait to film it! Anyway – I should start packing.
JOHNNO
(kisses KAT, pulls her down to sit) Do you really have to go?
KAT
Well… I’ve got my ticket. And my mother is expecting me.
JOHNNO
(sulky) I know. I just hate when you’re away.
KAT
(smiles) I’ll only be gone three days.
JOHNNO
(dramatic and means it) It will feel like an eternity.
KAT
(teasing) You can handle it, you’re a big boy!
JOHNNO
(offended) I am not a boy!
KAT
(confused) Of course not, it’s just an expression.
JOHNNO
(annoyed) Sounds bloody patronizing. Like I’m a child.
KAT
(taken aback) That’s not what I meant, I was just-
JOHNNO
(interrupts, getting angry) You never think, do you Kat? Could you think about someone else’s feelings for a change?
KAT
I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to-
JOHNNO
(calmer, sighs) You never mean to, but you just don’t think about what you say. You have to be more considerate.
KAT
Right. I’m sorry. (thinks) But, you know, I- I do think about others. People always say I think about others too much.
JOHNNO
(angry again, quickly) Fuck, Kat, there you go again. It’s all about you, isn’t it?
KAT
Actually, I-
JOHNNO
(mocking, quickly) I – I – I – me – me – me – all you think about, isn’t it Kat?
KAT
I-
JOHNNO
(mocking laugh, quickly) You can’t stop can you? All about you?
KAT
(angry and confused and very near tears) No! What are you saying? This is all so-
JOHNNO
(spiteful, quickly) You going to cry now? To make it all about you again?
KAT
(very upset) I can’t talk to you when you’re like this!
(KAT gets up, tries to leave, JOHNNO gets up too, grabs her)
JOHNNO
(furious, yelling, quickly) You are NOT leaving!
KAT
(shakes herself loose, yelling) Yes I am!
(JOHNNO throws KAT onto couch, KAT exclaims)
JOHNNO
(furious, yelling, quickly) NO!
(KAT gets up again to leave, JOHNNO slaps her, KAT exclaims in pain and falls back onto couch. Silence.)
KAT
(in shock) What… I… You- You hit me.
(KAT stands up, grabs phone, runs to front door, feet in shoes, opens door, slams door shut, runs down stairs, panting, throws herself at door, outdoor ambience, runs wildly for a few moments, panting, slows, stops, out of breath, lets out the ugly crying, staggers over to low wall, sits)
KAT
(mutters to herself) Han får inte göra så mot mig. Får inte göra så mot mig. Får inte får inte får inte. Får inte. (ugly crying again)
(KAT grabs phone from pocket, presses button. Beep. Click.)
Scene 33.5
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
(outdoor ambience)
KAT
(crying) Jess? I don’t know what to do. Johnno and I argued again… Can’t let him do this to me… I’m outside the apartment, don’t want to go back in but… I don’t know where to go. (crying) Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck fuck . I have to call my mother. (sob) I love you.
(clicks)
Scene 33.6
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
(upset) Kat! Got your e-mail. Thank you. So glad you are going to your mom’s a few days earlier. I just wish we could have whisked you away right there so you hadn’t had to go back to your apartment. (upset sigh) But I guess it’s good that you and Johnno talked. I… I am not sure he deserves that many more chances, you know? I- (stops herself) All right. I’ll do as you ask and keep our conversation to e-mail until we can talk on the phone. Say hi to your mom for me, right? I love you. So much. Oceans of hugs.
(clicks)
Scene 33.7
(caravan ambience)
OLIVIA
Right, I’m back. This was another tough week for Kat, obviously. If you are being hurt by your partner, please get help, call the police or talk to someone you trust. You could also check out our resource page, please go to y2kpod.com[slash]resources. So, listeners, there are no voice mails for next week, I suppose they were doing e-mails until that phone call. However, Tammi assures me there will still be an episode – I’m not quite sure how she’s managing that. I suppose I get a week off! There’s so much to do at uni, so I appreciate the time actually… I will talk to you again in two weeks.
OLIVIA
If you know anything about my biological father – Mike – please let me know, I would very much like to get in touch with him. (pause) Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find out more about the show, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. We are also on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days. I am so very happy and so grateful to our wonderful amazing patrons! We also have merch – check it out at Y2Kpod.com[slash]merch. Our amazing intro and outro music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 34: INTERLUDE – AUGUST 27, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 34.1
(00s landline phone dial tone)
JESS
Hello?
KAT
Hi Jess!
JESS
Kat! Yay!
BOTH
(almost at same time)
Happy birthday! (both laugh)
JESS
How are you? What time is it for you?
KAT
It’s eight in the morning, I just got up!
JESS
Huh. It’s early evening here. I’m going out for dinner after this.
KAT
Got my coffee! And a cheese sandwich – Swedish cheese! It’s delicious! (takes a bite)
JESS
(laughs) Whatever makes you happy, my dear. Oh, so good to talk to you!
KAT
So good to talk to you too! (happy tears) I’ve missed you so much!
JESS
(happy tears) Oh God I’ve missed you too!
(BOTH – happy tears laugh)
KAT (same time as JESS)
So tell me-
JESS (same time as KAT)
So how are-
(BOTH laugh again)
JESS
Guess we’re going to have to get used to this back-and-forth thing – we’ve been doing monologues for a while now.
KAT
(smiles) This is so much better! So, tell me about your new apartment! (takes a sip of coffee)
JESS
Oh, it is really nice! It’s on the third floor, and pretty big windows, so lots of light. No elevator, though, so that’ll be a challenge when we have a stroller- Oh crap. I am so sorry Kat.
KAT
(sad smile) I know. It happened. We don’t have to talk about it.
JESS
(softly) Unless you want to?
KAT
No. I am… Feel like we have talked about it.
JESS
Me too. All right.
KAT
Tell me about Rachel – seems she’s having some aches or something?
JESS
Yeah, she has ligament pain, in her hips, her doctor says it’s normal – but then it seems they say that about almost everything.
KAT
Yes. (beat) So how are you in all of this?
JESS
I’m… good.
KAT
There’s a pause there.
JESS
Yeah. I AM good. Rachel is wonderful, we are happy together, and I am so excited about the apartment. And the baby. I guess I just… I’m stressed out.
KAT
So what is stressing you out?
JESS
First of all this move – Rachel can’t do that much, of course, and everyone else has been wonderful helping out but I have to be the one coordinating everything and school is a lot and there is not a moment of my day I do not feel like I should be writing and I am worried about leaving Bri (Bree) and what if I never get a paying job and I could end up a crap parent and-
KAT
Hey! Breathe! Slow down. (beat) OK. You breathing?
JESS
Yeah. (breathes)
KAT
So the move is a lot now, but it will be all done in a few weeks, right?
JESS
Right. (breathes)
KAT
And is there any reason why Bri (Bree) would not be OK living in the flat with Maia and Tia?
JESS
(beat) No… not really.
KAT
Bri (Bree) seems very capable of taking care of herself – also it’s not like you’re going to the moon – how far away will you be?
JESS
(smiles) About 10 minutes by bus. Or a 20-minute walk.
KAT
(laughs) You will still see her all the time. What else was on your worry-list?
JESS
(laughs) You are “A-MAZING’, you know that?
KAT
(smiles) Just trying to look after you. (beat) So next was the biggie, I think – not being like your parents.
JESS
(sighs) That’s right.
KAT
I am definitely no expert at this but… The fact that you *want* to be different than they were, that you want to create another kind of family, that has to count for something. Also, there are two of you. And from what you’ve told me of Rachel, she has family love and support to spare, so, you know, follow her lead if you feel lost, OK?
JESS
Oh, I have missed you!
KAT
Me too. Feels so good to talk.
JESS
Yes. Thank you. But enough about me. Tell me about you.
KAT
OK. (sighs) I’m at my mother’s. But you know that. (beat) Been doing a lot of walking these past few days. Going past my old school, playgrounds, the library… It’s like a trip into the past. (sips coffee)
JESS
Good trip?
KAT
Some of it. I was really happy in high school, but most of these places remind me of the time before that, which as you know was less fun.
JESS
I know. (carefully) And… you know I have to bring this up now, right?
KAT
I know.
JESS
(carefully) So what’s going on with you and Johnno?
KAT
(sighs) We… made up, I guess. He’s not happy with me being here, but I really needed some… distance.
JESS
Yeah. (gently) I don’t think you realized, but… Your last message didn’t end when you walked into your apartment. It continued recording. (KAT exclaims) All through… until you ran out again and started fiddling with your phone.
KAT
Oh… Fuck. (starts crying)
JESS
I’m so sorry! I didn’t know if I should write it in an e-mail or… Decided it would be better when… when we can talk about it. I am so sorry this happened Kat. Fuck.
KAT
I… I couldn’t tell you… In a way I wasn’t even sure it really happened. (sob) Johnno was so… He was so sorry. And shocked, I think.
JESS
(carefully) But it’s not just this, Kat. This would be bad all on it’s own, but there is so much else. Like that time on his birthday-
KAT
(dismissive) Oh, I was just drunk. We’re fine now. The sex I mean. (beat) And the other thing… I hit him too, remember?
JESS
What? When?
KAT
I’m sure I told you about it. I slapped him in… April maybe. Right before I found out I was pregnant.
JESS
Oh. Yeah. But that was… That wasn’t the same thing.
KAT
Wasn’t it?
JESS
No. It was- it was-
KAT
I think in a way we’re even now. I hit him, he hit me. And we both agreed to not do it again.
JESS
Right. That’s good. But still, there is so much else-
KAT
We’re going to be fine. I love him. And he really is lovely, you know? Seems all you ever get to hear about is the bad stuff.
JESS
Yes, but… Remember New Year’s Eve? I said I’d heard Johnno’s not so nice to his girlfriends?
KAT
Sure. But that-
JESS
Wasn’t relevant then, but I’d heard that from Linda – you know, she’s really close with Johnno’s ex…
KAT
Louise.
JESS
Yes. Never met her, but Linda was talking about it maybe… a year ago? We were down the pub, and we were talking in general about relationships and Linda threw out a warning – she said Louise wasn’t herself when she was with Johnno. That he tried to control her.
KAT
Well he says she wasn’t so nice to him either. Anyway. Every relationship is different.
JESS
Of course. But-
KAT
(closes the conversation) I don’t think I can talk about this anymore.
JESS
All right. I am here when you do.
KAT
Thank you. Always. (sighs) I should probably get off the phone. Don’t want to make too much of a dent in my mother’s phone bill.
JESS
Right. Just… Are you happy, Kat?
KAT
I am… OK. Considering. But I think Johnno and I can be happy.
JESS
That’s all I ask. That you are happy. Or at least getting there.
KAT
I know. Are you? Happy I mean?
JESS
I am. So much is going on, but yes. I am happy.
KAT
I am so glad.
JESS
I love you.
KAT
Love you. So much. And – oceans of hugs! (smiles)
JESS
Yes! Oceans and oceans!
KAT
OK, I’ll go hang out with my mother. She is making me a cake. (smiles) Happy birthday!
JESS
Happy birthday! Bri’s (Bree) organized a dinner with all of our friends. Really wish you were here! (smiles) Bye Kat.
KAT
Oh, me too! Bye.
(phone click)
Scene 34.2
(waves) (music)
KARIN
Hi! Karin Heimdahl here, creator of Y2K and also voice of Jess. Thank you so much for listening to this interlude episode, and to our show, it really means the world to us. If you want to support us you can tell your friends about the show, rate and review us on your podcatcher of choice or you can consider supporting us on Patreon. We offer you a free podcast every week and we are a completely indie production, with no network, sponsorship or ads. Listener support on Patreon means we can recoup our hosting costs and pay our fantastic actors. All of our Patreon supporters get to listen to episodes early and get behind-the-scenes peeks, and some tiers gain access to our exclusive Tammi’s Takeover episodes, behind-the-scenes content and more. You can support us from as little as 1 US dollar a month – please go to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod to learn more. You can also check out our website y2kpod.com for more information on the show. Our wonderful intro and outro music ‘Welcome to the year 2000’ is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. Y2K features these wonderful voice actors:
(music changes)
KIRSTY
Kirsty Woolven as Olivia
JANIS
Janis Westin as Kat
KARIN
Karin Heimdahl as Jess
ADAM
Adam Blanford as Johnno
FELICITY
Felicity Boyd as Rachel
ANJALI
Anjali Kunapaneni as Shirin
SHEKENDRA
Shekendra Morgan as Maia
MADDY
Maddy Searle as Claire
ANNA
Anna Jartin as Tammi
LORCAN
Lorcan NicGiollaBhain as Bri (Bree)
CHARLOTTE
Charlotte Norup as Kirsten
NERYS
Nerys Howell as Emma
You can also look forward to some very exciting guest stars in the coming months, so look out for news on that! Next week Olivia will be back with a regular episode. Welcome back when we return to the year 2000!
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 35: AUGUST 28-31, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 35.1
OLIVIA
Hello listeners! I am back! And today I have an extra special treat for you. Kat – as you all know her – has agreed to record a conversation with me. She listens to the show now – my parents do too, which is… which is odd for me. But I like that they know what is going on. Mama actually said it was a good way to know what I am up to and where I am. (smiles) Anyway. Kat and I will be talking in about half an hour, which gives me – and you dear listeners – time to listen to this week’s voice mails. So last week there were no voice mails, apparently they talked on the phone instead, and the week before that they both reported back from better-than-expected week-ends with the in-laws, Kat got a small part in EastEnders and… Johnno hit her. Welcome… to the year 2000!
Scene 35.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hello Kat, it was wonderful talking to you yesterday. I’m so sorry if I pushed you too much on talking about Johnno. Of course you don’t have to talk about any of it if you don’t want to. I’m just… I worry. A lot. Which is what I do, of course. You know me. And thank you for parsing all my worries and making them seem manageable. That really is your super power. You are incredible. I am so lucky to have you in my life. I- (stops herself) So, last night Bri (Bree) had organized a dinner for me – I didn’t know where, so was a little nervous, but also excited ‘cause I trust Bri (Bree) and turns out it was at the café where she works – Gerrie’s! Was more like a party with food than a sit-down dinner which was perfect. Maia had decorated beautifully, and Bri (Bree) and Tia had made wonderful finger food – Brie puffs of course – but also focaccia and mini burgers and all sorts of deliciousness. And cupcakes! Bri (Bree) had made dozens of tiny adorable cupcakes instead of cake and it was gorgeous. And so many of the friends I have made were there, and Rachel was radiant and I forgot all about the stress of moving. It was glorious. (beat) Today I’m back in organizing mode, but I feel energized after talking to you and having such a wonderful night last night feeling so… at home. So, today I have-
(footsteps during previous)
MAIA
(yelling) Jess? You home?
JESS
(yelling) Come in Maia!
MAIA
(opens door) I need your help.
JESS
Sure. I’m recording for Kat, but I can be done in a minute.
MAIA
No, nothing practical for once. (smiles) I want to talk to you. (sits down) And Kat might as well hear it too – maybe she has some advice.
JESS
All right. I’m intrigued.
MAIA
I’m thinking of going back to school.
JESS
Right.
MAIA
It’s been *years* since I left university, but… I’ve been thinking.
JESS
What are you thinking of studying?
MAIA
Not sure. My degree is in fine arts, of course, but I think I need something that will… lead to employment I guess. (small laugh) That sounds depressing. I love freelance work, and the freedom that comes with that but… It is also exhausting to constantly have to find new work.
JESS
I can understand that. What about your library job?
MAIA
I enjoy it, I love meeting new people and being around books, but I could never be a librarian.
JESS
Why not?
MAIA
They have to be good with computers. I can just about work the library computer for registering books and making library cards, but proper librarians have to be great at IT and I definitely am not.
JESS
So what do you see yourself doing?
MAIA
Something to do with art, preferably, but that gives a bit more of a steady paycheck… Ugh. Feel like I am getting old and boring and betraying my dreams (sighs).
JESS
Really?
MAIA
Yeah. Or… maybe not. I’ll always make art, no matter what else I do. But the idea of being a full-time artist and being able to support myself through creating… Maybe it is time to realize that is not happening.
JESS
Maybe you’ve outgrown that dream?
MAIA
Huh. (slowly) Yeah. Maybe I have.
JESS
So what else can you do that is art-related…. Graphic design? Writing about art, um, journalism? Or… talking to people about art somehow…? Oh! You should go talk to one of the guidance counsellors at the university! Except it’s not called that… Hang on (digs among papers) here we go – it’s called course advice I think, if you go talk to someone at one of the student centers they should be able to help.
MAIA
Thanks. And… you’re a student… do you think I could do it? I feel *very* out of practice. (smiles)
JESS
Of course you could. You’ll get back to it again in no time. If that’s what you end up deciding, of course. Could be you figure something out that doesn’t mean going back to school.
MAIA
Could be. (smiles) Thanks. I knew you’d have some advice.
JESS
(smiles) Feels like I’ve barely said anything. But happy to help if I can.
MAIA
I’ll take you up on that. (gets up) Should go start dinner. Wanna help?
JESS
Sure! (smiles) As long as there are tasks befitting my skill level.
MAIA
(laughs) Will chopping veggies do?
JESS
(laughs) Perfect!
MAIA
(smiles) See you in the kitchen. (footsteps)
JESS
Be right there. (to KAT) So – I guess Maia would be grateful for any advice you may have, too. I had no idea they were thinking of going back to school, but it makes sense. Better go. Love you!
(clicks)
Scene 35.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KIRSTEN
Hej min skat! Jeg håber at flyrejsen gik godt! Det var så godt at bruge tid sammen med dig. Du kan altid komme her, hvis det er du har brug for det. Det ved du. Mor betaler. Okay? Kram til dig lille skat!
(clicks)
Scene 35.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hello Jess. It’s fine. It was amazing talking to you. Always is. (smiles) Suppose I need to talk about some things in smaller doses… I’m back in London. I had some really good days with my mother – we talked quite a bit and I think she is less worried. And we went on so many walks – beautiful evening walks around Trollhättan – there is a calm and quiet in a smaller city that you never get in London. So it was restful. And now I am back. Time to get excited about my EastEnders part again – think I know the script backwards and forwards at this point! But can’t hurt to read it some more… Let’s see. Johnno is at work right now, but he has thrown together some sort of birthday bash for me tomorrow night. Should be fun. (sigh) Working tonight. But kind of looking forward to it too – getting back into my routine and my inventory lists… (laughs) Never thought I’d say that! And… you will be a wonderful mother, you know. You are so loving and thoughtful. I know you are afraid you will fall into some of your parents’ patterns but you are *so* different from them. And Bri (Bree) is too. Are you sure you are related? (small laugh) Kidding! I know. I know. But you can find a different way of parenting, you know. And you will. (sighs) You can… borrow my mother, you know. If you want to hash out some parenting problems or whatever. Hash out? Is that right? Talk out? (small laugh) Hash in Swedish is pot… Anyway. I hope… (near tears) I hope I will someday get to have those conversations with her too, of course. But there’s enough of her to go around. If you want. (smiles)
(sound of front door opening)
KAT
(continues) Johnno’s home, better go! Oceans!
(clicks)
Scene 35.5
OLIVIA
Hello again, this is Olivia. It’s strange to hear Kat in 2000 when I am just about to talk to her in the now… But no crisis this week, thankfully. And… for the record. My parents have been brilliant. I couldn’t wish for any better. It’s just now they are… breaking up it’s … it’s hard for me. And it’s maybe harder *because* they’ve been so good, and loving, and stable. Suppose I am spoiled. (sigh) So many of my friends have separated or divorced parents and it’s seemed so… normal maybe? But now it is happening to me I feel like (near tears) all my foundations are crumbling… and… yeah. (pulls herself together) Time to make the call. Let’s see if I can get Skype to work… (clicks, distracted) Wish Tammi was here to help me, but she’s found some RPG folks here and they’re setting up a new campaign. (clicks) There, I think. (Skype call sound, click)
KAT
Hello?
OLIVIA
Aunt Ina (EE-na)!
KAT
Liv! I can hear you, but I can’t see you.
OLIVIA
Me neither, hang on. (clicks)
KAT
There you are! Now how… (clicks)
OLIVIA
Camera symbol?
KAT
(click) There!
OLIVIA
I can see you! Hello!
KAT
Hello lovely Liv! How are you?
OLIVIA
(smiles) I’m good. You?
KAT
(smiles) Very well.
OLIVIA
Thanks for agreeing to do this.
KAT
(laughs) Of course. Anything for you! Though everyone’s advised me against it, my agent, my lawyer… They say it will ‘damage my image’. (smiles) I really don’t care.
OLIVIA
You sure? I can cut this part and call you ‘Kat’ if you like.
KAT
I’m sure. Hey, I’m a 40-something actress, any press is good press.
OLIVIA
(laughs, then serious) You think there will be press?
KAT
Probably. “Podcast reveals: Ina Fischer abused by boyfriend” Completely disregarding the fact it was twenty years ago… (smiles) Should be good for your podcast, though.
OLIVIA
I… I never meant-
KAT
I know. I’ve listened to the whole thing. I understand, Liv. It’s OK.
OLIVIA
Thank you. So… maybe I should start by asking about your name.
KAT
(smiles) It’s actually related to what is happening in those voice mails you are playing. After the relationship with Johnno ended – strange to say his name now – haven’t thought about it, all of this for so long, Liv. Your podcast has brought it all back.
OLIVIA
I’m sorry.
KAT
Don’t be. It is so long ago now. Of course there is still pain there – trauma never really goes away. But like I told you when we first spoke about it – I really think this story needs to be told. Far too many enter into abusive relationships and don’t realize it until it’s too late. Anyway… Where was I?
OLIVIA
Your name.
KAT
Right, the name. You know my full name is Katarina, but I don’t think anyone but my mother and school teachers have ever used that. Growing up, I was always Ina or Kat or Katta with my friends. And then when I moved to London I thought I’d better pick one of them to avoid confusion, so I was Kat. And then – I was pretty broken after that relationship, and I felt like reinventing myself. Took some time before your mum got used to Ina, though!
OLIVIA
(smiles) I can imagine. It took me a while to figure out who you were.
KAT
(laughs) I heard! And I get that.
OLIVIA
So… there are many voice mails left, and the listeners and I don’t know what happened to you in the remainder of the year 2000.
KAT
Spoilers! But I already have spoiled something, right? That the relationship ends. Ended? I get confused on the tenses!
OLIVIA
Oh me too!
KAT
Anyway. You can cut that if you want.
OLIVIA
I’ll leave it in. Think it’s a relief to know that it does end. Not that we know when.
KAT
OK.
OLIVIA
I suppose… I’ll just let you say whatever you want to say about what happened back then.
KAT
Think I’ve said quite a lot. So, no spoilers… Hm… When Johnno and I got together I thought I really had to give the relationship a chance, you know? I felt like I hadn’t given previous relationships the opportunity to develop, like I hadn’t been fully on board, and I felt it was time. Really bad timing, let me tell you! I was… almost 24, so a little older than you but not much. I dived in head first and I worked… (some emotion creeps in) I worked so hard at it. I worked so hard at everything and I didn’t see he wasn’t putting in the same work. And I didn’t see he was putting me down and cutting me off from my friends, from my mother. And the more… tangible forms of abuse… took me years to admit even to myself. Years and years of therapy. (small laugh) It’s like… I couldn’t admit what was going on, if I did I would have to face that I had to end it, and that was… too hard. So much got repressed, I’m not sure all of it has surfaced, even now. Which is why re-listening to it is probably good, even if it is painful.
OLIVIA
All right.
KAT
But there is also so much light and joy on there! Like your mum, hearing the beginnings of our long-distance friendship… We’re still at it, as you know. (smiles) Friends across various oceans for over 20 years at this point. Though life and jobs and everything else means we’re not quite in touch weekly anymore. But she is so important to me. And so is your mama. And you. You know that, right?
OLIVIA
I know. But… now they are getting a (voice breaks) divorce…
KAT
I know. I am so sorry, Liv.
OLIVIA
Don’t you have to, I don’t know, pick a side?
KAT
I think in most separations, yes. But this one… (carefully) Your parents still have so much love for each other. And it’s sad they are separated, but… Not every great love story lasts forever. And just because it ends, doesn’t mean it wasn’t great.
OLIVIA
(unsure) I… hadn’t thought of it like that.
KAT
We all want that happy ending, right? Like in stories – or movies! (laughs) But the story goes on, and sometimes what used to make you happy doesn’t anymore. There doesn’t always have be villains and victims, sometimes it is simply… life. I admire both of your parents for recognizing that.
OLIVIA
I suppose… It just (voice breaks) hurts.
KAT
Oh dearest Liv. I am so sorry. Of course it hurts. No getting around that. Wish I had a magic wand to wave…
OLIVIA
(smiles through tears) Yeah – what kind of fairy godmother are you, anyway?
KAT
(laughs) The strictly non-religious kind! No magic here!
OLIVIA
But you are sort of my godmother, aren’t you?
KAT
Well. Sort of. More like an honorary aunt, really. Of course you have lots of wonderful actual aunts, too!
OLIVIA
(smiles) I do.
KAT
Have you seen any of them yet? I mean, you are in Auckland, right?
OLIVIA
Not yet. But I’m planning to.
KAT
Good. (mobile phone buzzing, KAT silences it) Sorry! I should go. Take care of yourself, Liv. Being 20 isn’t easy, but you seem much more level-headed than I was at your age.
OLIVIA
(smiles) Thanks. I think? Take care of you too! And belated happy birthday!
KAT
Thank you! And – oceans of hugs?
OLIVIA
(laughs) Oceans of hugs!
KAT
Love you, Liv!
OLVIA
Love you! Bye! (clicks) Right. That’s it for today, dear listeners. Talk to you again next week!
(Trailer for The One Stars)
OLIVIA
If you know anything about my biological father – Mike – please let me know, I would very much like to get in touch with him. (pause) Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find out more about the show, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. We are also on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days. I am so very happy and so grateful to our wonderful amazing patrons! We also have merch – check it out at Y2Kpod.com[slash]merch. Our amazing intro and outro music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 36: SEPTEMBER 1-10, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 36.1
OLIVIA
Hello dear listeners, I’m Olivia, welcome to the Y2K podcast! This has certainly been a… WEEK. Suppose you’ve all seen at least some of the headlines… I think both Ina – Kat – and I completely underestimated how well-known she is and what a *thing* this would become. My phone normally never rings, but this week all sorts of press have been trying to get hold of me. Happily for me it’s always on silent. (smiles) For any press folks listening – I won’t talk to you about Ina Fischer. On that I refer you to the public statement she issued a few days ago. What I have to say will be heard on the podcast, and nowhere else. Please respect that. Thank you. (smiles) But also – welcome to all our new listeners, I hope you are enjoying the show, and that you will stay with me as we listen through the voice mails from the rest of the year 2000. Also – it is father’s day here in New Zealand this Sunday, and as you know I am looking for my bio-dad. So, listeners new and old, if any of you have information that could help me find him, please let me know, all right? Don’t talk to him about it for me though – I want to contact him myself. Thank you all, so much. Last week Maia was considering going back to university, Bri (Bree) threw Jess a birthday bash and Kat returned to London. Welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 36.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hey Jess, (not very excited) I have a new job. I’ll be working in a call center selling tickets for concerts and football matches, things like that. I’ve given notice to Lee – he wasn’t too happy about it but I think he understands. I start training on the booking system next week, and then I’ll work two jobs for a few weeks – three next week actually, I have the EastEnders filming on Thursday. I have read that script so many times it is now falling to pieces… Can’t risk not knowing my lines! Anyway, it should all be OK – none of them are full time. The pay is a little less than I got as manager, but the hours are better – no more late nights. Also it’s in Leicester Square, so I’ll be downtown every day, which is cool. Most call centers I applied to were in zone 3 or 4 – or even further out. So that should be good. (sighs) I’ll miss the pub, though, and Lee and the others. And my lists! (laughs) But hopefully Johnno will be happier, and no evening shifts means we get more time together. I-
JOHNNO
(excited, yelling) Kat!
KAT
(yells) Yes?
JOHNNO
(opens door) There you are! We’re going to Berlin!
KAT
(stands up, surprised, smiles) We are? When?
JOHNNO
(kisses KAT) This week-end!
KAT
Wow. (happy) That’s great. I’ve never been to Berlin.
JOHNNO
Really? We need to celebrate your new job! (pulls KAT close, deep kiss, seductively) I booked a great room… I want to see you (whispers unintelligibly in KAT’s ear, about 10 words).
KAT
(turned on, giggles) We’ll see about that… Oh, but we’ll be back for Monday morning, won’t we?
JOHNNO
Sunday night. Won’t let you miss your first day! And Í can’t wait to show you Tresor!
KAT
(laughs) I have no idea what that is, but, absolutely. Let’s have fun!
JOHNNO
(laughs) Only *the* techno club in Berlin. Also a record label. I have their latest on vinyl. I’ll go dig it out for you, sweetie. (kisses KAT, footsteps)
KAT
(small laugh) Techno? OK… (to JESS) So we’re going to Berlin. Wow. (slightly surprised) I’m glad. I need some fun. Also I think it’ll be good to keep busy this week-end so I don’t get too nervous about the EastEnders-
JOHNNO
(techno beat starts, yells) Kat, come listen!
KAT
(yells) Coming, sweetie! (to JESS) Better go. Oceans!
(clicks)
Scene 36.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
EMMA
(ashamed and stressed) Hello Kat. It’s Emma. I am so very sorry! (mutters) Blydi twpsen! Beth yffach o’n i’n meddwl. I know I had no right. I didn’t mean to. I was curious. You don’t talk much about what is going on with you and Johnno, and I know it’s not my business, but things seem… things don’t seem right. And I really care about you and I was just fluttering about the world wide web typing in my friends’ names in search engines and happened across your LiveJournal and… I’m so sorry. I was spying. Yes it’s public but I get that this was somewhere for you to vent and be anonymous and I want you to have that. I won’t look again, I promise! I’m so sorry!
clicks)
Scene 36.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
(low voice) Kat! I am dead on my feet. Holy crap. Sooo tired. The move went pretty well. Though at the very end Rachel remembered she had some stuff in the basement of her flat that she’d forgotten about, and I almost had a panic attack. (deep breath) It was only a few boxes and two chairs, so it was fine, but just that feeling of ‘we´re almost done’ and then there is more was pretty hard to deal with in that moment. Anyways. I think we are all moved in. Boxes everywhere. We got the basics set up. Bed, TV, couch. And computer, of course! I’m in the living room, Rachel’s asleep in the bedroom. Poor thing! I think not being able to help out was even more draining for her than if she’d been able to lift boxes… But we had lots of help, and a traditional pizza party at the end of it… Bought pizza, but still good. And now they’ve all gone home, and this is home for us now… (stretches, yawns) It’ll be good. Looks a mess now, of course, but it’s a nice place. Have to go get curtains tomorrow, the bedroom is flooded with light in the mornings, so will be very hard to sleep in… I should get up early and get some writing done anyways. So, in order to do that I should go to bed. (yawns) Congrats on the new job! Seems all right – though Johnno seems much more excited about it than you are. Maybe it will be fun once you get going. And have a great time in Berlin – I haven’t been either. Never pictured you in a techno club, but I guess there’s a first time for everything (laughs, then yawns). Have a wonderful time! Love you! (yawns, cut off)
clicks)
Scene 36.5
KAT
Hey Emma. It’s Kat. (smiles) It’s all right. I get it. (beat) No worries. Maybe… maybe we should go for coffee some day? I’d like to see you. Text me, OK? Big hugs!
clicks)
Scene 36.6
OLIVIA
Right, Olivia here again. So, no big crisis in the voice mails this week, that’s a relief! And even Johnno was rather nice – I suppose he was happy he’d got Kat to switch jobs. Also… I never knew mama had such a tough pregnancy. You see pregnant women running around and doing everything other people do, I suppose I never thought it could be limiting like that. Probably different for everyone… And “LiveJournal” (smiles) – I googled it and it seems it still exists, but I never knew anyone who was using it. Seems to be most popular in Russia these days. Right. Time to wrap this up. Bye for now!
OLIVIA
If you know anything about my biological father – Mike – please let me know, I would very much like to get in touch with him. (pause) Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find out more about the show, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. We are also on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days. I am so very happy and so grateful to our wonderful amazing patrons! We also have merch – check it out at Y2Kpod.com[slash]merch. Our amazing intro and outro music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 37: SEPTEMBER 11-17, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 37.1
OLIVIA
Hello dear listeners, Olivia here. I have been so focused on coursework that I hadn’t noticed – but spring is here! It is beautiful – the cherry trees are almost in bloom, and it *smells* like spring! Makes me want to run outdoors and never go back inside! And for now I don’t have to – we have mid-semester break! Tammi and I and some uni friends are going hiking in the Waitakere Ranges – and I cannot wait! So – for any press folks wanting to talk about Ina – there is even less point of you calling now, as my phone will probably be out of range. OK ? (beat) Last week Jess and Rachel moved to their new flat, and Kat got a new job and was heading for Berlin with Johnno. Welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 37.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hi Kat! Sorry about the lack of communication last week – I was exhausted from the move and after that so busy with… everything. But we do have something resembling a home now, and both Bri (Bree) and I have a week off from uni, so she’s offered to help us fix the last… (laughs) 536 things. There is no IKEA in New Zealand, sadly, could have used some cheap and cheerful stuff, but we are making do pretty well. Need to start getting some proper baby stuff soon, too. Try to get most of that used, I think. (touched) Thank you so much for offering to ‘lend me’ your mom. You… Thank you. You made me feel better about this whole parenting thing. Escaping the ‘sins of the father’ and all that crap. So… (carefully) Seems like you’re trying to get pregnant again maybe? I… if that’s what you want I really hope it works… but also… I worry. You know me. I worry this is not the best time in your relationship, but then – oh who the hell am I to talk about timing. Maybe timing is just crap. Things can work out or not work out regardless of timing. I only… As always. I want to make everything easy and fun for you, and life keeps insisting on sabotaging this plan (small laugh). Hope Berlin was good, anyways, and that the new job and the old job and your very exciting TV shoot all go well. Lots going on right now for you! Lots going on here as well really – moving and writing and also – Rachel and I are off to the 20-week-scan on Thursday – I am not missing this one! Though according to Rachel it’s pretty hard to understand what is going on (smiles). I don’t care, I just want to be there. And – hopefully – hear that everything is all right. This is the half-way point, so – Aaahh! – counting down from here… Still can’t quite believe it. (beat) Love you so much, my dear. Oceans of hugs!
clicks)
Scene 37.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hey Jess, just completed my second day of ticketing system training. It’s going well, I think. I’m sure the work will be OK. We got home from Berlin very late Sunday night, the flight was delayed, so haven’t quite caught up on sleep yet, but it’s all been good. Even the techno club! Not generally my thing, but I got dancing and since there wasn’t a clear break between the tracks I kind of zoned out and kept dancing much longer than I usually do. It was restful, somehow. (beat) And yes… we are trying for a baby again. Still hard to consider the idea it might all go to hell again, but… I can’t imagine *not* trying either. So next week sometime I will either get my period, or… not. (smiles) Never kept track of my period in my life – you know how I am always surprised yet another month has passed and I have to go buy new tampons! – but I figured I had better get started. So, little red circles in my calendar from now on… I think you are right about timing. There is never going to be a perfect time. So full steam ahead – Steam? Yeah, steam! – and hopefully I’ll be pregnant again soon. And maybe we can still have babies born in the same year – Rachel’s due date is in January, right? Oh, I just want to put all the horror behind me and get everything back on track. So… fingers crossed, please… Speaking of fingers crossed – I am so excited for EastEnders on Thursday! I will let you know how it goes – can’t believe I’ll be there, on that set! I’ll have to take a train super early – it’s *not* in fact in the east end, it’s at the BBC studios north of London. All fake, I am sure… Wonder if the bricks are real or plastic? If I get a chance I’ll go squeeze one (laughs). I feel like this is it – I am finally on the right track to doing what I want. I can’t wait. This could open some doors, Jess. Some real actual doors into acting work. Could of course also go completely unnoticed, I know that. But still. Could lead to more exciting things. I feel like the door I’ve been banging so desperately on is finally opening, even if it’s just a crack. (laughs) Mixed door metaphors today! Have fun fixing up your place – and send me pictures once you’re done, all right? Love you!
(clicks)
Scene 37.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
SHIRIN
(very excited) Jess! It’s Shirin – I have news! Remember that competition I entered? Where the prize was an internship in New York? Well… I GOT IT! I’d almost forgotten about it to be honest. But I got a letter saying they (paper rustling) thought my work “showed a fresh and invigorating design talent”! (laughs) That sounds a little pretentious, but I don’t care. I’m going to New York! I leave in a month, and then it’s a six-month internship (paper rustling) “with the opportunity for extension and advancement within the company” which is exciting. The pay is minimal, but part of the prize is paid housing, so that is all right. Will probably be a tiny room somewhere but I don’t mind. As long as there are no cockroaches (shudders) you do hear stories… No, I’m sure it’s fine. So… any tips for moving halfway across the world would be greatly appreciated (smiles). Hope all is well with you. Yankee hugs today! (laughs) Bye!
(clicks)
Scene 37.5
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Shirin! Jess here – congratulations! That is so wonderful! I am so excited for you! I am sure you will have a wonderful time, and learn so much! So thrilled things are happening for you career-wise! Yay!
Advice… let’s see… Don’t fill up your suitcase with towels and bed linen like I did, one of each is fine and you can get the rest once you get there. What else… Music! Bring your discman and a bunch of CDs – maybe burn some CDs with compilations of your favourites? Those first few weeks were very, very lonely for me, and music definitely helped… Hoping you won’t feel as lonely, of course, but can’t hurt to be prepared. Don’t bring too many books – they’ll weigh down your suitcase and you can always go to a used book store and get a stack of novels. Also – I arrived in Auckland without any good light summer clothes so I spent my first few days sweating a *lot* before I caved and bought some tank tops. You won’t go from winter to summer like I did, but make sure you have lots of layers for any temperature – you don’t know if your housing will be air conditioned to freezing point or hot and stuffy. Think that’s about it – I am so happy for you! So much happiness today – went with Rachel to the halfway scan for the baby and everything looks great. It was near-impossible to make out the baby on the screen, though, but once I did, I realized the baby was sitting up waving their hands about – it was adorable. And a little freaky! But mostly cute. Anyways. Congratulations again – you deserve this! Canuck hugs I guess! (laughs) Bye!
clicks)
Scene 37.6
KAT
Hi Jess, it is very, very late and I am home after a looong day at the EastEnders studio. And I’m not done – they moved some scenes around due to weather, so I am going back tomorrow. Should be good but right now I am too exhausted to think about it. (smiles) It was such a rush though – my character is one of two women in a human trafficking storyline, and I get to be completely broken and miserable and I love portraying such powerful emotions. I *think* I did OK. I remembered all my lines and all my cues, so at least didn’t make a fool of myself. (smiles) It was such a friendly set – everyone I met said hello, even the regulars. Oh, I hope I did well! We’ll see in… six weeks I think. But you won’t be able to see it in New Zealand, right? I’ll have to tape it and send it to you! (yawns) Time for bed – tomorrow is outdoor scenes. Wish me luck! Love you!
clicks)
Scene 37.7
OLIVIA
Hello again – I’m back. I wonder if I could find that old EastEnders episode on YouTube? Would be fun to see her first TV acting gig. Kat seems happier here, but also there seems to be a lot she is trying to ignore. And my parents moved in together… (sad smile) I don’t remember this flat – we must have moved again at least once before leaving Auckland. I remember one flat, I know it was in Mount Albert… Hm… I wonder if I should go have a look around the area, and see if I recognize anything. Have definitely not been there since I was little, so it will probably look really different. Bit of a pilgrimage… Or something (sighs). But first, hiking adventures await! Talk to you next week!
(Trailer for Dice Shame)
OLIVIA
If you know anything about my biological father – Mike – please let me know, I would very much like to get in touch with him. (pause) Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find out more about the show, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. We are also on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days. I am so very happy and so grateful to our wonderful amazing patrons! We also have merch – check it out at Y2Kpod.com[slash]merch. Our amazing intro and outro music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 38: SEPTEMBER 18-24, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 38.1
OLIVIA
Hello! Olivia here, relaxed, happy and filled with so much springtime joy and incredible nature and fresh air I can hardly contain it! We were very lucky and it didn’t rain once, though we did three days of hikes. (beat) I love living here. I know I am both Kiwi and British, and my mum’s Canadian, of course, but I’ve always felt… English I suppose… and yet here, now, I am starting to feel Kiwi too in a way I don’t remember feeling before. Although I don’t sound Kiwi, though, not sure I could! I was asking Kai the other day about a good place to get new headphones, and they said what I thought sounded like Dixmouth (-mouth pronounced like in Plymouth), but I couldn’t find it when I googled it. Turns out it’s Dick Smith’s (laughs) I love that! Need to calibrate my ears to the Kiwi accent, I think… Time for some voice mails perhaps? Last week Kat filmed her TV role, Shirin got an internship in New York and Jess and Rachel settled in at the new flat. Welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 38.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
(outdoor city ambience)
KAT
Hey Jess. On the bus, hope you can hear me OK. (sighs) Today is not great. Got my period this morning. It’s just a regular period among dozens – hundreds! – I’ll probably have in my life but… fuck. (near tears) I felt like it was time, you know? I know it is nothing to worry about but… I wasn’t prepared for how hard this would hit. (almost sob) It’s like a loss… even though there was never anything there to lose. And it’s… (voice breaks) it feels like I am miscarrying all over again… I know that’s not it, but… Yeah. (deep breath) It’s fine. We’ll just… try again. And I’ll feel better tomorrow. But today… I am mourning the loss of a… dream, I suppose. (sighs) A *lot* going on, as usual… I went back for my second day filming EastEnders on Friday, it was exciting and exhilarating and all went well, but… I completely forgot that I was due for a shift at the pub at lunchtime. Completely flew out of my head. So once I was done filming I had about twenty missed calls from Lee. It was awful, I never miss things like that. But I did. (sighs) Oh maybe I should get a psych-, a therapist. You *can* get them on the NHS. Talked to some people at work about it and they said the waiting lists are really long – can take months apparently. But maybe worth getting the process started, anyway… Tomorrow I work my last shift at the pub. I’ll be sad to leave, it’s been pretty good. But the new job will be good too. (smiles) “Welcome to Ticketmaster, my name is Kat, how can I help?” – don’t I sound professional? Working on my voiceover skills! Much much better than speaking Norwegian, don’t you agree? (smiles, then sighs) I always feel gloomy around my period so it’s never the best time to get bad news – and now the period *is* the bad news… Ugh. Oh well. There’s always next month. And then the month after that, and the next, and the next… Better get used to it I suppose. I’m meeting Emma for coffee now, hopefully she can cheer me up a little. Take care my dear – I miss you! Oceans!
(clicks)
Scene 38.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
BRI
Hi sib. It’s Bri (Bree). Probably the last person you expect to hear from on here. It’s late, you’re probably asleep. Know you check these voice mails first thing, so… Here I am. Talking to you from last night. (smiles) This isn’t urgent, exactly. I just don’t want to forget to talk to you about it. I know you worry living in different flats will be bad for us. (smiles) We will be fine. Five years on different continents didn’t break our connection, I think we can handle separate apartments in the same city. (smiles) Think we can handle anything. (beat) I wanted to talk to you about… I’ve been writing songs. Gerrie has a guitar in the café, and I’ve tuned it and started playing when the café is empty. Gerrie happened upon me singing today, and they want me to sing at the open mic next week. I… would love to. But also I worry that it will… attract unwanted attention. (smiles) I am not like the other girls, as you know, and sometimes it is best to just stay under the radar. Talk about it tomorrow? (smiles) Today, for you. Love you sib.
(clicks)
Scene 38.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hi Kat. I’m so sorry. I know you had hopes for this month. I’ve never thought of it like that – but of course getting bad news while hormonal and bloaty is always bad, so, yeah. That really sucks. And please do get on the waiting list for a therapist. Can’t hurt, right? I am still seeing Antonio, but we are spacing out the sessions to monthly, and he says we should probably phase it out so we’re finished by the end of the year. Feels OK. (stretches and yawns) It’s late – Rachel’s asleep, Bri (Bree) just left, we’ve had a really long talk. Turns out she’s been writing songs – I had no idea. She’s always been musical, of course, but it’s the first I’ve heard of her writing songs. Rachel and I got to hear two of them, and I am simply floored. So powerful, so beautiful. I know Bri (Bree) is my sib and I am probably biased, but still. She is incredible. She is concerned about performing in public, though. Apparently she tried it in Edmonton a few times, and she got a little more attention than she wanted from revolting men with wandering hands, one of whom turned into some kind of stalker for a while. So, pretty damned grim. We talked for a long time. And in the end she decided to try it anyway. Because she really wants to. So she will be performing at the café’s open mic night next week. The crowd at Gerrie’s is… it’s not stated anywhere, but let’s just say there aren’t many straight white men there, generally. So I am hoping it will be a supportive place for Bri (Bree). And I will be there with a barge pole, so if anyone tries anything funny… Yeah. Nothing could stop me from being there. I am so proud of her, my heart is bursting at the seams. I-
(sound of bedroom door opening, bare feet on wood, RACHEL moans and grunts a little from hip pain)
JESS
Rachel! Did I wake you? I’m so sorry!
RACHEL
(very sleepy) No, love. Just need to pee. (pained grunt)
JESS
(stands up) Let me help.
RACHEL
(leans on JESS, footsteps from both) (sleepy) Thanks. Ow. I’ll be right. (smiles) Just this kid sitting on my bladder.
JESS
Yeah. We’ll tell them off for that later.
RACHEL
(sleepy laugh) We will.
JESS
I’ll wait here.
(door opening, RACHEL goes in, door closing, sounds of peeing, flushing, washing hands, JESS hums ‘Scarborough Fair’, door opens)
JESS
Here. (RACHEL leans on JESS, they start walking back. Small pained exertions from RACHEL.) You all right love?
RACHEL
(sleepy) Yes. Better now. (they move into bedroom, RACHEL gets back into bed, voices are distant) Come to bed love, it’s late.
JESS
(kisses RACHEL) Hm… (smiles) Better not right now. Not sure I’d want you to go back to sleep.
RACHEL
(sleepy laugh) Can you hold that thought ‘til I’m much more awake please?
JESS
(small laugh) I will. (kisses RACHEL) Sleep well my love.
RACHEL
(very sleepy) I love you.
JESS
Love you. (footsteps, door closes, footsteps, JESS hums again) Oh! (to desk) I’m back, Kat. Time to wrap it up, I guess. Rachel’s… you heard. Walking is painful for her. She has this elastic belt-thing that helps a bit, but apart from that, not much can be done, apparently. All frustratingly normal… Oh, that’s right, I never told you about the scan. Everything is good, all measurements and tests and everything looks exactly as they should. So the baby is perfect, it’s just hard on Rachel. (sighs) Have to remind both of us that it’s temporary. She’s not 97 all of a sudden, she just feels like it, she says. The midwife says it will go away once the baby is born. So there we are. As far as curveballs go, I think this is one we can handle. Or, Rachel is handling it fine. I’m the one who is most frustrated about it – feel so damned powerless. (yawns) This time I’d really better go sleep. Love you! Oceans!
(clicks)
Scene 38.5
OLIVIA
Oh that was… a little too close, somehow. Huh. (smiles) Mama used to tell me a story of how I used to kick her bladder when I was inside her tummy so she had to go pee STRAIGHT AWAY. I remember laughing so hard at that when I was… six maybe? Seven? I suppose this is the start of that. (smiles, then yawns) Right, I should go to bed too – must be all that fresh air. Talk to you next week. Bye!
(Trailer for Palimpsest)
OLIVIA
If you know anything about my biological father – Mike – please let me know, I would very much like to get in touch with him. (pause) Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find out more about the show, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. We are also on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days. I am so very happy and so grateful to our wonderful amazing patrons! We also have merch – check it out at Y2Kpod.com[slash]merch. Our amazing intro and outro music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 39: SEPTEMBER 25-30, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 39.1
OLIVIA
(fake cheerful) Good morning, listeners! … or afternoon or whereever it is where you are… (smiles) I am so thrilled we have listeners in all sorts of time zones. (beat) I’m in a bit of a funk today, actually. Talked to my mama yesterday, and they’re selling the house. They’ve only lived there for five years or so, so it’s not like it’s my childhood home or anything, but… I have my room there, and it’s… (upset) If they sell it there is nowhere for me to go back to. No place that is… (voice breaks) home, I suppose. And that… I’m grown up and it shouldn’t matter… but I feel all adrift… (sob) They put so much effort into making it theirs. And now… (small sob) I suppose they really are splitting up. For real. It’s s till hard to grasp… (sighs) Sorry. I didn’t mean for that all to spill out. (beat) Anyway. I am still looking for my dad – my bio-dad – Mike – and it seems he may be Australian. I had an e-mail from Cassie the other day, and they’re a little stuck at the moment, but they got as far as Melbourne… Cassie and Charlene think he worked in one of the libraries there in 2000. So, if we have any listeners in Melbourne, and you could help us find Mike – hashtag find Mike! – please get in touch. Thank you so much. (beat) So, last week, Kat was unhappy about getting her period, Bri (Bree) decided to perform at the café and Rachel’s hip pain was worse. Welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 39.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hey Kat, this will be short. I’m leaving for a tutorial in one minute. Just wanted to say thank you so much for your latest batch of feedback on the screenplay. That would never have occurred to me. But you are completely right. Karen would never do it that way. I am reworking it and sending you a new version, looking forward to hearing what you think. Oh, and Bri (Bree) is performing tomorrow – I am going to try and record it for you. Fingers crossed it will work! Love you!
(clicks)
Scene 39.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
SHIRIN
Hello Jess, Shirin here. Thanks for the packing advice. (smiles) I am getting everything ready – my nan has agreed I can keep my room in the flat, so I am leaving a lot of my stuff here. Will get some time off in December so I’m probably flying home then to see my family. And to grab all the stuff I am forgetting now, I suppose. (laughs) It’s overwhelming – trying to anticipate every need I‘ll have for… *months* and then trying to cram it all in one suitcase. I remember you stressing about it and now I understand why! But yes, I know I can get things there, as well. (beat) I tried to get a leave of absence from work, but they declined, so… I resigned. It is scary to leave but I haven’t been happy there for such a long time that it was also a relief. Speaking of relief… I broke it off with Dave, finally. Should have done it long ago, of course, but… I enjoyed having him around. He says he’ll miss me so much and I… I don’t think I will miss him. Didn’t say that, of course. But I am ready for this new adventure and I don’t want anything to hold me back. (beat) Hope everything’s good with you. More yankee hugs! Bye!
(clicks)
Scene 39.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hello Jess, I am so glad I could help! I guess writing is like any other creative project – always better when you bring in lots of different perspectives. Looking forward to reading the next screenplay version! (beat) I am tired but (surprised) kind of happy – had a pretty good day at work. Got to talking to some of my colleagues at lunch – I always bring a packed lunch, city centre is *expensive* – and we were swapping stories of all the bananas callers. It was hilarious – I didn’t have many stories as I am still so new, but I told them about the man I spoke to yesterday – he was getting football tickets – Chelsea against Manchester United I think – and when I was entering the credit card information I have to put Miss or Mrs or Mr, so I said “And that’s ‘Mr’…?” and he said, in the RP:est of RP accents “No, it’s ‘Lord’, actually” (laughs). I mean, turns out there are boxes to check for Lord and Lady and Doctor and all sorts of titles if you just look for them, but… Why would that be important? I hardly think his credit card would be rejected for using the wrong title! (more serious) People are strange… What else… I went to my GP yesterday, and she put me on the therapy waiting list. She couldn’t say when it would be my turn, but she said it is likely to be months rather than weeks. She also did a check-up, and apparently my iron levels are low, so I got some pills. And she told me to get on prenatal vitamins since I am trying to get pregnant. So am popping pills over here… I’ve been thinking I should try to lose some weight and maybe cut down on coffee and alcohol, in case it makes a difference. (sigh) I just want to be pregnant again, Jess! Wish I could snap my fingers (snaps fingers) and make it happen… Ugh. Anyway. I have some fun new colleagues to talk to. Always something. And I really hope your recording works tonight – can’t wait to listen to Bri’s (Bree’s) song! Love you! Oceans of hugs!
(clicks)
Scene 39.5
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
(café ambience)
JESS
Kat! I’m at Gerrie’s open mic night. So excited! Hope I can make this work – so I can record Bri’s (Bree’s) performance for you. Hang on – there we go…
(clicks)
BRI
(slightly distant) Hello. My name is Bri (Bree), I’m really nervous. I wanted to sing a song I wrote and… Anyway. This is Hero. (Starts singing. Stops.) OK. I’m gonna go again. Sorry. I’m so nervous.
(BRI performs song, applause)
JESS
(happy tears) Isn’t she incredible? I have to go give her a big hug. Love you!
(clicks)
Scene 39.6
OLIVIA
Wow. I knew aunt Bri (Bree) did some singing, but I’ve never heard any of her music before. I wonder why… I tried to see her – she lives in Auckland – but she’s been overseas for a few months, and she’s coming back in October, I think. I’ll try to catch up with her then. Thanks for listening, truly. It means so much to me. (beat) Talk to you next week.
(Trailer for Cast Junkie)
OLIVIA
If you know anything about my biological father – Mike – please let me know, I would very much like to get in touch with him. (pause) Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find out more about the show, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. We are also on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days. I am so very happy and so grateful to our wonderful amazing patrons! We also have merch – check it out at Y2Kpod.com[slash]merch. Our amazing intro and outro music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 40: OCTOBER 1-8, 2000
CONTENT WARNING
OLIVIA
Hello dear listeners, this is Olivia. This week we have a content warning for psychological abuse. We have a resource page on the website, where we have tried to list as many hotlines, info-pages and support things we could find. So if you feel you need any resources like that, go to y2Kpod.com[slash]resources and hopefully you will find it there. Please take care of yourself, and if you need to, don’t be afraid to reach out and ask for help.
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 40.1
OLIVIA
Hello and welcome to Y2K! I’m recording this late at night – Tammi has ingratiated herself with the student radio here, and so I am in a proper studio again! Thanks so much 95bFM! So… I’ve finally fixed a time to visit my grandparents – Rotorua is about four hours away by train so not *that* far but I’ve been so busy that it just hasn’t happened yet. So next week-end I am off to spend a few days with them, and the rest of the clan, of course. Not everyone still lives there anymore, but there are still plenty of aunts, uncles and cousins to see… And I hope to squeeze in a hike – the nature around Rotorua is simply spectacular. (beat) Someone asked if I was in touch with my other grandparents – Jess’ and Bri’s (Bree’s) parents. And no. Never met them. Not sure they know I exist. And… it’s strange but I don’t feel like meeting them either. Especially after hearing how they treated their kids. Of course I have many more details now through the voice mails, but I always knew they hadn’t accepted Mum and Bri (Bree) for who they were, and this was why we weren’t in contact. I want to find Mike not only because he is my bio-dad but also because he seems by all accounts to be a decent human being. I see no reason to meet the people who hurt Bri (Bree) and mum so much. That might change, I suppose. But I don’t think so. Anyway. Last week Bri (Bree) sang at the café, Kat had a good time at her new job, and Jess reworked her screenplay. Welcome… to the year 2000!
Scene 40.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Shirin! It’s Jess. So good to hear from you. Sorry it took me a while to get back to you. Exciting times, huh? Yeah, I think as long as you bring the basics with you, you can add the rest once you’re there. Layered clothing and music, and then you’ll be good! I am sitting at my desk in our new apartment with the window open, and the sun is streaming in and it smells almost like summer. I am still a little lost in the seasons but… Ahh! Springtime! It always makes me so happy, whenever it turns up. Makes me want to run outside and… hug a tree! (laughs) I should be writing, of course. At this point there is not a second of the day where I should not be writing. But taking a break to message you and smell the air… (breathes deep) Things are good, Shirin! I have so much to do and of course I get stressed and anxious and worried but… Thinking back to this time last year… well, you were there… I was so miserable over Claire and didn’t know what I wanted to do with my life… And now I am with the most wonderful person and I get to write every single day and I am so damned happy! (smiles) I hope you find all you want and need in New York, my dear. You deserve every good thing. Big hugs!
(clicks)
Scene 40.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JOHNNO
(yells, distant) Kat? Come here!
KAT
(yells) OK! (to herself) Guess I’ll do this later.
(click, footsteps, quick kiss, voices distant)
KAT
What?
JOHNNO
(excited) We’re having a dinner party on Saturday!
KAT
We are? (laughs) All right. I guess you’ll be cooking then?
JOHNNO
Of course! I’ve found this recipe for watermelon and feta salad that should be a good starter, and then steak of course, and *you* are making dessert. (kiss)
KAT
(smiles) I can do that. Mud cake?
JOHNNO
I was thinking something more *now*… Cupcakes?
KAT
That works. Who’s coming?
JOHNNO
I invited Mark and Julie, Paul and Stacey, and Simon and Lisa.
KAT
(coaxing) Johnno! You know I don’t want to hang out with Simon.
JOHNNO
(annoyed) Oh, come on Kat. That was ages ago, and you’ve met them both since.
KAT
Yes, but I really don’t want to spend a whole evening with him. You know that! Nothing against Lisa, she’s great.
JOHNNO
(cold anger) I’ve already invited them. You’re my girlfriend, you live here paying next to no rent, the least you can do is be decent to my guests.
KAT
I-
JOHNNO
(cold anger) No arguments. They are coming and you will smile and laugh and wear a pretty dress and that is that.
KAT
I can’t-
JOHNNO
(furious, quickly) You will do what I say! (grabs glass off table and smashes it in corner, KAT exclaims in fear, JOHNNO grabs another glass and smashes it, KAT again exclaims in fear) Oh for fuck’s sake. I am not touching you! (pause, calmer) I just… don’t make me angry, Kat. All right? Just stop making me angry.
KAT
All right.
JOHNNO
We’ll have a great time, I promise!
KAT
Yes.
JOHNNO
You can wear that pretty 50s dress we got at Camden Lock last week-end.
KAT
Fine.
JOHNNO
It’s all right, sweetie. I forgive you. I know you didn’t mean it. (kisses KAT)
KAT
(as if waking up) We should… we should clean up that glass. Someone could get hurt.
JOHNNO
Thanks sweetie. (kisses KAT) I’ll go check my e-mail.
(footsteps, sound of vacuum cleaner being pulled out from closet, plugged in, vacuum sounds, JOHNNO sits down, voice much closer)
JOHNNO
(continues, mutters) What’s thi-
(clicks)
Scene 40.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
(outdoor ambience, Leicester Square)
KAT
(tired) Hello Jess. Ugh. Not so great today. Johnno and I argued last night. I thought… I thought we were doing better. But maybe not. We made up, of course. (sigh) We always do. (sad laugh) And we had to – these are the “baby-making” days of the month. I know. That sounds awful. And it is. Having sex on a schedule because you ‘have to’ is incredibly unexciting. It’s fine once we get going, but getting there is… Yeah. Also Johnno isn’t… he thinks we should just ‘let it happen’ so it’s mainly me keeping track. I’m tired, Jess. I can’t sleep once we’ve argued, takes me ages. I’m on my lunch break, in Leicester Square, looking straight at the cinema posters… ‘Billy Elliott’ is the big one right now, all around the square. Haven’t seen it, but I’d like to… Anyway. Better go back to work. Oceans of hugs!
(clicks)
Scene 40.5
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Kat! Are you all right? I heard- not sure how it happened exactly, but I heard your fight. And he’s- he’s… Kat, he is not playing fair. He is getting angry and then blaming you for it. Blaming you for provoking him. And this time it wasn’t jealousy, it was simply you standing up to him. And he has to be able to handle that. Oh dearest Kat, if he can’t… He has to learn how to handle you saying no. That’s pretty basic after all. Right? I- hearing you sound so.. not yourself. I- it- (sighs) I worry about you. So much. Let me know what I can do, all right? I am here. Always. I love you.
(clicks)
Scene 40.5
OLIVIA
Olivia here, back again. I’m so glad she said that at the end. Not that I know how much use it will do. But it seems Jess – my mum – is always on tiptoes and doesn’t dare speak up properly when Johnno is doing all these awful things. And I understand. She doesn’t – didn’t! – want to risk Kat closing off and not speaking to her. I suppose we will see what happens… Happened! Navigating the tenses is hard. Time to go, I think. ‘Til next week!
(Trailer for Vampires of White Chapel)
OLIVIA
If you know anything about my biological father – Mike – please let me know, I would very much like to get in touch with him. (pause) Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find out more about the show, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. We are also on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days. I am so very happy and so grateful to our wonderful amazing patrons! We also have merch – check it out at Y2Kpod.com[slash]merch. Our amazing intro and outro music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 41: OCTOBER 9-15, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 41.1
OLIVIA
Hey everyone, Olivia here. Very busy at uni these days, but still time to enjoy spring! I went for a run today and it was so beautiful! It’s very hilly around here, so am completely exhausted, but in a good way, you know? (contented sigh) Skyped with my mum today too – seems they are having trouble getting the house sold, so it will definitely still be theirs when I go home for the holidays. Not so great for my parents, but makes me happy that there *is* a home for me to go to… Suppose I’ll have to pack up my old room while I’m there though, which is less fun. (sighs) Anyway. Let’s get to the voicemails. Last week Johnno and Kat had yet another fight, and Jess was concerned about Kat but happy with her life. Welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 41.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KIRSTEN
Hello Jessica, it’s Kirsten. I got your e-mail. And I am as worried as you are. (sighs) Katarina is not… like herself. I feel like I can’t reach her, no matter what I do. Oh, it’s so hard. I want to get on a plane and give her a big hug and bring her home with me but… (sighs) She wouldn’t want that. She is grown up and makes her own decisions, and no matter how much I would like to protect her (voice breaks) I just can’t. All we can do, is be here. Listen, let her talk when she wants to, and wait. Wait for her to ask for help. I know that is so hard, and I am so sorry I don’t have a better solution, but… if we criticize him too much she won’t talk to us. And then she’ll have no-one. (beat) I know you have so much else going on in your life, Jessica. And I am so grateful that Katarina has you as a friend. I know you and your girlfriend have a baby on the way, and I am so happy for you! Please take care of yourself, and those close to you. Hugs from me!
(clicks)
Scene 41.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hey Kat, you all right? Haven’t heard from you in a little longer than usual… Listen, I’m sorry if I was too negative about Johnno in my last message. I don’t mean to criticize, I am just worried. Right. (sighs) I am writing. When am I *not* writing these days? I think I got the screenplay to a pretty good place, so I am letting that rest for now, and working on the other text. Trying to be all scholarly and getting my references right… Very different from drama school! But I enjoy this part too. It’s structured and predictable in a way I enjoy, once I get into it. Anyways. What else… We have all the boxes unpacked now, except for two that are sitting in a corner. Mocking us. Books, of course. Need to get more shelves, somehow! Rachel can’t really do anything heavy, so that is my job. She is handling it well but I’m… I’m still so… taken aback by how limiting this is for her, how much pain she is in, and how we just keep being told it is all fine and normal. Ugh. I’m not that worried, but I feel… helpless. I-
(front door opens, slow labored footsteps)
RACHEL
(pained grunt, panting, small laugh) Those damned stairs!
JESS
(rushes over) Rachel! You all right love?
MAIA
(helps RACHEL to couch) Easy… sit.
RACHEL
(panting, as she sits) Ow! Thanks. (smiles) I’m all right, my love. (a little breathless) But it’s bad today. Good thing Maia was there.
MAIA
Couldn’t let you go home alone in that state.
JESS
Thanks Maia. Anyone want tea?
RACHEL
(heartfelt) Yes please! You’ll stay, Maia, won’t you?
MAIA
‘Course. (sits down) You got so much unpacked!
JESS
(fills kettle, turns it on, from kitchen area) Still those two boxes in the corner, though. (takes out mugs)
MAIA
Eh, just throw a blanket over them and call it a sideboard!
(RACHEL and JESS laugh)
RACHEL
Perfect! (tiny grunt as she shifts position) We actually need a sideboard there, don’t you think, Jess?
JESS
(smiles) Could work. (beat) Citrus Rooibos for you love?
RACHEL
Yes please!
JESS
(opens cupboard) What would you like Maia? Earl Green? Chamomile? Jasmine? (rustling in cupboard, doubtful) Passion fruit and cream? (smells tea) Eew…
MAIA
(laughs) Chamomile please.
(sounds of JESS making tea during following)
MAIA
(concerned) So Rachel, are you sure you should still be working full time?
RACHEL
The doctor says it’s fine.
MAIA
Yeah, but you barely made it home today. And we had to rest three times on our way up the stairs.
RACHEL
I- (small pained sound)
JESS
Here, love. (JESS gives RACHEL her mug of tea)
RACHEL
(small grunt of pain, takes a sip) Thanks.
JESS
(comes over with mugs of tea for herself and MAIA, hands one to MAIA) Here you go.
MAIA
Thanks! (blows on tea, takes a sip)
JESS
(sits down) Maia’s right, my love. Seems it gets harder every day for you. (sip of tea)
RACHEL
(sighs) I know. I just… It’s so silly. I’m pregnant, not sick.
JESS
But… does it matter why? You are in pain and have a really hard time walking.
MAIA
Go talk to your doctor, Rachel. And stop being so damned stoic. (smiles) No prize for that, you know. (sip of tea)
RACHEL
(small laugh that turns into pained grunt, sighs) You are right. But I *do* feel silly. Millions of women are pregnant and manage to get on with their lives as usual right up until they deliver. Suppose I just feel… whiny. (sip of tea) Like I am making a fuss.
JESS
(snorts) You are the least fussy person I’ve ever met!
MAIA
True. Keep having to *force* you to let me help you at work.
JESS
(serious) You are obviously having a very different pregnancy to those running around right until the final weeks. And that is all right.
RACHEL
I know. (sighs)
MAIA
Also who knows how many others are having a hard time just like you? You never see them ‘cause they are *not* running around, right?
RACHEL
(laughs) Yeah. That actually makes sense.
JESS
So, you going to talk to your doctor? And maybe your boss, too?
RACHEL
I will. (sip of tea)
JESS
All right. (sip of tea)
MAIA
Good. (sip of tea)
JESS
(gets up, footsteps) Anyone want some cake? I think- Oh! (laughs) Think I’ve recorded this whole thing for Kat. (footsteps, closer) Hi Kat! (to MAIA and RACHEL) Do you mind?
RACHEL
(same time as MAIA, laughs) No. Hello Kat!
MAIA
(same time as RACHEL, laughs) That’s fine!
JESS
All right, better send this off. Love you, Kat!
MAIA
So let me tell you about this amazing art project I’m working on-
(clicks)
Scene 41.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
SHIRIN
(very excited) Jess! I am here! I’m in my tiny box room in Brooklyn – no cockroaches, so all good! (laughs) I started yesterday and I am so excited! The people I am working with are really energetic and ambitious, and I will get to develop my own project in a few months! So different from my old job and London, the pace is much quicker, the bar is higher, and all I have to do is jump! I am *so* ready for this – bring it on! (laughs) I feel like I am finally getting to FLY after months and years of being tied down. (happy sigh) Oh Jess, this is the place for me! I feel so energized just getting on the tube, sorry! – subway – going to work. I am sure this initial excitement will subside but for now I am THRILLED to be here! I am so ready to love this job and these people and this city! So that’s my update – let me know what’s up with you! Hugs!
(clicks)
Scene 41.5
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
(low energy) Hey Emma, Kat here, what’s up with you? Haven’t seen you in a while and was wondering… if you’d like to go for a pint or something someday soon. Maybe bring Claire? And Lee, too, if he wants to come? I know Shirin has left, sorry I missed her going-away party, I… We had another thing already planned. OK. That’s it. Take care, Emma. Let me know. Bye.
(clicks)
Scene 41.6
OLIVIA
Right, so… No message from Kat to Jess. Think that’s a first. Right. Well, we’ll see what happens next week. I’m off to Rotorua tomorrow – excited to see all my relatives! (yawns) Better get some rest. All right. Talk to you next week, listeners!
(Trailer for Songbirding)
OLIVIA
If you know anything about my biological father – Mike – please let me know, I would very much like to get in touch with him. (pause) Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find out more about the show, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. We are also on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days. I am so very happy and so grateful to our wonderful amazing patrons! We also have merch – check it out at Y2Kpod.com[slash]merch. Our amazing intro and outro music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 42: OCTOBER 16-22, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 42.1
OLIVIA
(energetic) Welcome listeners, it is a beautiful day in Auckland and I have been outside all day – field work today. But now I am inside a windowless studio again, talking to you! (smiles) Had a wonderful time in Rotorua, wasn’t quite as crowded as when I was little, though. Most of my cousins have moved away for work or uni, and aunt Deborah and her family live in Christchurch now. But still lots of relatives to meet, and lots of exclamations of how much I’ve grown up and how English I seem and how I need to eat more and how come I don’t have a partner when I’m so pretty… (laughs) All said with such warmth and care that I don’t mind much. As usual spent most of the time in my grandparents’ kitchen having tea with various relatives. I love that kitchen. Somehow always feels warm and sunny and smells of fresh bread… Also did an incredible hike with my aunt Nicola and her sons – my cousins – Caleb and Kieran. Hiking here in New Zealand makes me feel the most Kiwi I ever feel – I love this land and its nature so much. At those moments I forget all about… everything… and want to stay here forever. (smiles, then sighs) Of course my grandparents asked about my parents. They know all the facts. And they are sad. But they are also both really pragmatic, and were mainly concerned about me. (smiles) It was nice to be the focus of some grandparent TLC… Ok. Time for voicemails, I think. Last week Maia and Jess worried about Rachel and Kat, and Shirin was happy in New York. Welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 42.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Kat! Haven’t heard from you in ages! What’s going on? You all right? I’ve tried e-mailing too. Please get back to me – I am really worried. I am sure it is all fine but I am so far away and I get so damned worried (breathes) You know me. Please… I’m sorry, all right? I’m sorry I was so critical, I’m sorry if I don’t listen well enough, I just… I just *need* to know you are all right. (half-laugh, half-sob) ‘Cause in my racing mind you are lying in a ditch somewhere and I… I can’t bear that. (beat) Why is it always a ditch? Also you’re in the middle of London, where would you even find a ditch? (unhappy laugh) I need someone friendly to tell me: Don’t panic! Just get back to me, please? I love you so much.
(clicks)
Scene 42.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
RACHEL
(softly) Hello my love, it’s Rachel. It’s late. The baby woke me up and now I am wide awake (smiles). You are asleep in the other room and I really hope you are getting some rest. (beat) I know you worry. About me, about the baby. About Bri (Bree). About Kat. About your dissertation. And I get it. You have a lot of things to worry about. But you need to also find some rest, some peace, some breathing space, my love. (beat) I am so glad to be with you, I am so glad we are together and I cannot wait to be a parent with you. (soft laugh) Poopy nappies and all! And we will be fine, the baby and I. I may not be walking so well these days, but with shorter work days and working from home a little I won’t have to walk so much. And Bri (Bree) is thriving at uni, and from what I’ve seen of your dissertation it is shaping up to be brilliant. But Kat seems to be in a tough place, so that worry is probably justified. Try not to let it *consume* you so, love. You cannot rescue someone if they’re not ready to be rescued. You know? You can only be there. It’s strange to think I haven’t met Kat – I so feel like I know her. But someday we will meet, hopefully when she is much happier than she is now. (softly) Ow! (smiles) Hey, baby, stop kicking your mama’s bladder, all right? Trying to talk to your other mama (smiles) – eventually we need to figure out what the baby will call us, love, we can’t both be mamas. Or (attempts Canadian accent) ‘moms’ (soft laugh). I love you so much. That is all. See you in the morning.
(clicks)
Scene 42.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Mrs F- Kirsten? It’s Jess. I just sent you an e-mail. But had to message you too. I haven’t heard from Kat in… eleven days, which has never happened before. Please tell me she’s been in touch with you! I am… I am so damned worried. I worry he’s done something… Oh fuck no. Sorry! Didn’t mean to curse. Wait, you don’t care, do you? Oh I am all muddled. Just let me know. E-mail or here, I don’t care which. Thank you so much. Big hugs.
(clicks)
Scene 42.5
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Emma? Jess here. Did you get my e-mail? I sent it to you and Claire and Shirin – not that Shirin is nearby anymore… But at this point I am ready to try anything. Have you heard from Kat? She’s not been responding to me in twelve days, and I am so fucking worried I don’t know what to do. Please say you’ve talked to her? Let me know, all right? Thanks, Emma. Love you.
(clicks)
Scene 42.6
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
CLAIRE
(uncomfortable) Hey Jess, it’s Claire. Got your e-mail. Emma’s in Wales, visiting her mum, not sure she’s seen it. Kat is all right, I think. Or she was when I saw her Monday night. We went out for a pint, her, me, Emma and Lee. Kat’s idea. Unusual, but… yeah. She didn’t talk much, but she seemed all right. I suppose that boyfriend of hers is being an asshat again. But, yeah. Physically, at least, I think she’s fine. Right. So. Told you that now. (sighs) Look, Jess, I- (beat) I’m s- (sorry) I never- (pause, deep breath) Didn’t mean to call you when I was drunk that time. You never responded. (sighs) Of course you didn’t. I am not- Things aren’t great here in Claire-land and I think that was one of the lower lows. Right. (pause) Now you know about Kat. Bye.
(clicks)
Scene 42.7
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
(verge of tears) Oh Jess, I’m sorry. I’m alive. I’m all right. I didn’t mean to make you worry so much. I’ve had e-mails and texts from all sorts of people saying I need to get in touch with you. I get it. Damn. I just didn’t know how to… I didn’t know what to say. I get that you are worried about me and Johnno. And yes you are right sometimes he… doesn’t fight fair. (pause) But I don’t think I’m always fair to him either. And there is always give and take in a relationship, you know? (beat) Anyway. I am sorry. Truly. Won’t happen again. (sighs) There might be a reason I was feeling so down. PM-fucking-S. Not that I realized that’s what it was, I was hoping… But I got my period today. It’s… it’s so hard. Every month I have to hope, I have to believe it will work this time, and then when I get my period… My body fails me. Yet again. My stupid body couldn’t keep the baby and now it seems… No new baby either. At least not this month… Ugh. Soon we will have to start all over again with the scheduled sex… And then there are those two torturous weeks of waiting. And I have to hope, right? I have to hope that *this* time it will work. Fuck. It’s so destructive. It’s like grieving every month and then forcefully cutting the grieving short and starting to hope again, only to grieve, and then hope… And I’ve only done it for a few months! People do this for years… Yeah. I really hope it’s not years for us… (deep breath) Anyway. I do have one bright spot in all this misery, though I’m nervous about it… (smiles) My EastEnders episode is airing tomorrow! Johnno’s organized a watch party – his friends basically, Emma and Claire were both busy – but should be fun, I think. I hope! Or else I will want to hide behind a pillow somewhere… We shall see. I am really excited, of course, and I think I did well, but you never know how it will turn out. Eeek! I will tape it for you and see if I can send it. That’s all for today, I think. Sorry again about disappearing on you. It wasn’t… I didn’t mean to. (sighs) I love you. Oceans and oceans.
(clicks)
Scene 42.8
OLIVIA
Hello everyone, I’m back again. Lots going on in this episode. I tried to track down that EastEnders episode on Youtube but I couldn’t find it… Maybe one of you will find it – if you do, e-mail me a link please! (smiles) Next week I will have a guest on the podcast – I’ll be talking to someone I haven’t talked to in a long time. Looking forward to that! Bye for now!
(Trailer for The Rise of King Asilas)
OLIVIA
If you know anything about my biological father – Mike – please let me know, I would very much like to get in touch with him. (pause) Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find out more about the show, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. We are also on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days. I am so very happy and so grateful to our wonderful amazing patrons! We also have merch – check it out at Y2Kpod.com[slash]merch. Our amazing intro and outro music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 43: OCTOBER 23-31, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 43.1
OLIVIA
Hey listeners, it’s Olivia. I am recording this a few days early because exam season is upon us and I have SO MUCH revision to do. Term times are different here than I’m used to, and we’ll be done with this term in mid-November, and then I’ll (beat) go home for Christmas, I suppose. (slightly emotional) Seems like the house will still be theirs, and that we are doing… one last family Christmas together… Or something. (deep breath) I’ve always loved Christmas. We’re not a religious family, but I love finding the right presents for everyone and making and eating delicious food and all the beautiful candles and… just how cosy and pretty it is. And the smells… (sighs) But it’s Halloween now, and I am way ahead of myself talking about Christmas already. Tammi got us invited to a Halloween party next week, so I have to figure out what to wear. Must be easy to acquire and not make me feel stupid… And also not be ‘sexy’, especially in that horrible Halloween way… Hm… Not much time with all the revision going on. Tammi is doing something elaborate, I am sure, she always goes all in. Maybe I’ll get her to help me. Yes. That is what I will do. (beat) All right. I promised you a guest today – they will come after the voicemails. So let’s get to those, shall we? Last week Jess was worried about lots of things and Kat was depressed about getting her period and also preparing for a watch party for her EastEnders episode. Welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 43.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
(very excited) Jess! You won’t believe this! *I* can’t believe it! But I am *so* happy! I’m- I’m engaged! *We’re* engaged! We’re getting married! Well not right away, but we are! Oh Jess, I wish you were here! I am so happy – Johnno had planned it as a surprise – after the EastEnders watch party – I will tell you *all* about that later – he went down on one knee and there was champagne and everything! I- I know I’ve always said I don’t care about getting married, but turns out I really like the idea once I get engaged (laughs) Or maybe once the right person asks me (smiles). I always thought if I were to get married it would be one of those quick civil ceremonies just for convenience, but… Oh Jess I really needed something fun to happen! Something to think about and plan for when things are hard… You know. And of course you have to be there – wouldn’t dream of getting married without you there. So… not sure what kind of wedding it will be, but… You will be my bridesmaid, won’t you? Or maid of honor or whatever it’s called? You will stand up there with me and support me, right? (teary-eyed) Of course you will! I know that. Just need to plan all this so you can be there, that’s all. (beat) Oh, shit! Running late for work – my call center shift starts in half an hour. Have to run – oceans and oceans!
(clicks)
Scene 43.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hi Claire, Jess here. (beat) Thank you. I know that wasn’t easy for you, and I really appreciate it. I… I am sorry you are having a tough time. I hope… I didn’t know how to respond to your message, the drunken one I mean… But, yes. I really am happy. I… And also yes. You were controlling. At times, very controlling. Didn’t see it at the time really, but, yeah… Hearing about Kat’s boyfriend, though… Compared to him, you were… all right. Everything’s relative, right? (small laugh) Fuck, Claire, you hurt me. You really hurt me… (pause) Anyways. Thanks for letting me know about Kat.
(clicks)
Scene 43.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
MAIA
Hey Jess, it’s Maia. Yeah, I’ve found my way onto this voicemail thing as well. (smiles) Bri (Bree) showed me. Can’t let the rest of you have all the fun, can I? Don’t see you quite as often these days, so I thought I’d update you a little. First of all, Fire Woman is finished – finally! Still finding beads in every corner, but absolutely worth it. I am really happy with her. She will be unveiled at Town Hall in about a month, you and Rachel should definitely come! If Rachel can walk that is… Glad she is working less, but, you know. Rachel won’t tell you when it gets too much, so keep an eye on her. And let me know when you need help too, all right? I didn’t even know you last year and now… couldn’t imagine you not being here. Or Bri (Bree)! (beat) So… I followed your advice and had a talk with one of the course advice people at the university. They were really nice, and walked me through all these options – I thought my head was going to explode at one point! But they boiled it down to a few different paths. And I think I have it figured out. Should have been obvious, now that I think about it. (excited) I am going to be an art teacher! It’s perfect. I love hanging out with kids and teenagers, and I love helping others find ways to be creative. Also I think kids need teachers who really care, you know? And maybe I can actually help a young person who is having a tough time – letting them express themselves through art. Yeah. I think this will be just right. So… I’m applying to start this February, and since I already have a degree it only takes a year of post-grad. And I can keep working at the library part-time, so we’ll scrape by, Tia and I. (smiles) That’s my news. I finally know what I’m going to be when I grow up. (laughs) Have a great day, Jess, see you Saturday! What is that thing you say to Kat…? Oh, yeah – oceans of hugs! (laughs)
(clicks)
Scene 43.5
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Kat! Holy shit! (swallows) Congratulations! That is incredible! (beat) Of course I will be there. Wouldn’t let you get married without me. I will be there, and I will wear whatever hideous dress you choose, and I will make a speech – (smiles) or not, if you want – and I will help you with whatever you need. I am THERE. Just tell me when. All right? And I completely get that you need something good to focus on when things are hard. So make plans, and look at your ring – did you get a ring? Not sure you mentioned one… Anyways. Have fun planning, but, maybe let it take it’s time? People plan weddings for years to get them right, so no rush, right? And feel free to throw wedding ideas at me whenever you like! Dearest Kat. I want all the good things for you. You know that. And… I am so glad you are all right. I was so scared. You know how I get. So… please don’t go radio silent again. Not sure my heart could take it. If I say something that upsets you, let me know. E-mail me or something. Right? I love you. So much. I couldn’t stand it if you were hurt. So don’t get hurt, my dear. Easy. (smiles) Halloween coming up – we are going to a non-Halloween Halloween thing this week-end at the local church – it’s a family event, Maia’s doing face painting. Guess that’s the sort of parties we will be attending these next few years with a kid! Should be fun. I am probably just grabbing a witches hat-
(bedroom door opening, labored footsteps)
RACHEL
(sleepy) Morning, love.
JESS
(goes to support RACHEL) Morning! (By couch) Here?
RACHEL
Yeah. (sits down, small pained grunt, they kiss)
JESS
Tea?
RACHEL
Please.
JESS
(sounds of making tea) I’m messaging Kat, you can say hi if you like.
RACHEL
(still sleepy) Hello Kat. So glad you are all right.
JESS
(pours tea, carries mug to RACHEL) Here you go, love.
RACHEL
Ta. (sips tea)
JESS
I’ll just finish up my voicemail.
RACHEL
Take your time. I’ll sit here and wake up.
JESS
(bends down to kiss RACHEL) All right. (footsteps, sits down, to KAT) Hey Kat. What was I talking about? Oh yeah – Halloween. Know it’s not your favorite holiday – but hey maybe you can be the bride of Frankenstein or something? (laughs) Not! But I guess a witches hat for me and… (to RACHEL) for you too?
RACHEL
I was going to ask Maia to paint something scary on my belly but I think that would just freak out the kids (laughs)
JESS
(laughs) That would be cool, though. Maybe a Jack-o-lantern? They’re not so scary.
RACHEL
Better not. Halloween’s not so big here as you know… (sips tea)
JESS
I know. Still looking forward to it. We’ll have fun.
RACHEL
We will. (slight pained grunt) Better get some breakfast.
JESS
Sit down! I’ll do it.
RACHEL
(slightly annoyed) I’m not an invalid. I can still make breakfast. (gets up, slight pained exclamation, labored footsteps)
JESS
I’m sorry. Don’t mean to…
RACHEL
(gently) It’s all right. I just have to do some things for myself. (smiles) While I still can, anyway. (making breakfast sounds, small pained sounds)
JESS
Of course. Tell me when you feel like being pampered, all right?
RACHEL
Don’t worry, love. I will!
JESS
Good. (to KAT) Time to go I think. Love you KAT! Oceans!
RACHEL
Bye Kat!
(clicks)
Scene 43.6
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Thank you so much Jess. For being there. Always there. And for understanding. And for being a bridesmaid. Or whatever. (laughs) Though why would I put you in a hideous dress? Is this a Canadian thing? Wouldn’t it be better if I put you in something you like? Or, better yet, if *you* choose something you like? And you hate dresses, so that’s a no to begin with… (laughs) We will figure all this out! As you said, there is time. (beat) You asked about the ring… Should have mentioned it, shouldn’t I? It is at the jeweler’s, being resized. It’s… nice. Oh I don’t know. It mainly makes me nervous because it’s so expensive. (smiles) Have to get over that, don’t I? I will… And I am still not used to Halloween after all these years here – I mean I love dressing up but this thing of little kids dressing up as monsters is… creepy. Gives me the wiggins. (laughs) Probably ‘cause I didn’t grow up with it. We dressed up as witches for Easter, though, and went around the neighborhood asking for sweets, did you ever do that? But we were *cute* witches, with colorful scarfs and rosy cheeks and painted-on freckles… Not scary at all! Anyway. We’re skipping Halloween, happily, Johnno is away for work. (beat) I have to tell you about EastEnders! All in all I think it turned out pretty good. It’s always odd to see yourself on screen, and seeing myself in Albert Square on TV was somehow even stranger than being there filming it. I cringed at some of my lines – I could have delivered them better. But then I always feel that way looking back. And I think the director mostly chose the right takes of me, so that’s good. The watch party, though… There were about 20 people in our living room and I was feeling really stressed out. Johnno was so proud of me, and everyone was so excited and encouraging, but… This is not an uplifting story, and my character spends most of her time on-screen either being beaten or crying or in a really bad state post-trauma talking about being beaten and crying. And all these people who don’t know me *that* well were trying to cheer every time I showed up on screen and they couldn’t very well cheer at all the misery and it was… really uncomfortable. Most people left really quickly after the episode was over, though they said nice things about my performance… So, lesson learned. Watch parties are for comedy or possibly romance, *not* gritty drama. (sighs) After everyone left, of course, Johnno got out a bottle of champagne and I didn’t understand what was going on but… Yeah. (smiles) Engaged! It’s funny. I never thought I would get excited about that. My mother was never married, and my friends’ parents… some were, of course, but many weren’t, and it really didn’t seem to make any difference. But I am excited. I suppose we’ve already passed my big commitment thing – trying for a baby – and out on this other side… so an engagement, and then a wedding, feels like a really good idea. Feels like something fun, and exciting. Something to be happy about. And that has to be a good thing. (yawns) Sorry! Time to go sleep, I think. Oceans of hugs!
(clicks)
Scene 43.7
OLIVIA
Right, hello! Olivia again. Still no luck finding that EastEnders episode. Answers on a postcard… (laughs) So, yesterday I recorded a conversation with my guest – I went to her office at the university here, actually. Any guesses who I’m talking about? Oh, I won’t keep you guessing. It’s Bri (Bree), my wonderful aunt. After the recording ends we’ll go straight into the outro. Talk to you next week – here we go!
Scene 43.8
(BRIEF MUSIC)
OLIVIA
Hello! I am here with my aunt Bri (Bree)!
BRI
Hello!
OLIVIA
You’ve just come back from a trip, right?
BRI
That’s right. I’ve been in Arizona working with folks from the Navajo Nation, trying to learn more about their traditional gender roles. I was going to be here and welcome you to Auckland, but the opportunity came up quickly and I had to take it. But you seem to have settled in well.
OLIVIA
(smiles) I think so. And now you’re back, and we’re in your office at the University of Auckland. (beat) Full of books and stacks of paper – are you sure you need all this paper? It is 2020 you know.
BRI
(smiles) Life in academia does seem to involve an unreasonable amount of paper.
OLIVIA
So… I’ve filled you in on the podcast via e-mail, and you’ve listened a little, too, I think?
BRI
Yes. All caught up.
OLIVIA
(surprised) Oh. Really?
BRI
Long flight from Phoenix.
OLIVIA
Right. And… are you OK with it?
BRI
(smiles) Yes. Talked to your mom too.
OLIVIA
Could this… I mean… could this be a problem for you? I mean at work, and in your research?
BRI
(small laugh) I am already out in every possible way. It’s probably held me back some, but I think in the end it’s good.
OLIVIA
I realize we’ve never talked about this. I mean… you’re just my aunt, you know?
BRI
(smiles) As I should be.
OLIVIA
(smiles) Yeah. But… You mean being out has held you back in your career?
BRI
Definitely. In fact, I was lucky to come to New Zealand, not sure I would have been able to have a career in academia anywhere else. Much less become a professor. Have you heard of Georgina Beyer?
OLIVIA
No.
BRI
I only learned of her when I moved here. She was the world’s first trans mayor, you know, elected in 1995, and then the world’s first trans MP, in 2000. A trailblazer in so many ways.
OLIVIA
Wow. I had no idea.
BRI
Most people don’t. She was – and is – an inspiration to me.
OLIVIA
Sounds like she’d be an inspiration to anyone.
BRI
Yes. And I thought if she can inspire me, maybe I can inspire someone else.
OLIVIA
That is wonderful. (beat) I… I heard your song in the voicemails.
BRI
(smiles) Yeah. I’d almost forgotten about that.
OLIVIA
It was beautiful. Did you ever think about… (pause)
BRI
Pursuing music instead of Social Anthropology? Yes I did. Academia won in the end, though.
OLIVIA
Why?
BRI
Suits me better. I love writing songs, and I love singing, but performing takes a lot out of me. (beat) I’m an introvert. I like observing and analyzing. Lecturing is a bit like performing, though, so I haven’t completely abandoned that side of things. (small laugh) Also I still sing sometimes. Suits me better as a hobby than a career.
OLIVIA
Makes sense I suppose.
BRI
(smiles) Enough about me. Let’s talk about you. And your podcast. You’re looking for your bio-dad?
OLIVIA
Yes. Mike. Do you… do you know anything about him? I mean… if you’ve listened, you know pretty much what I know…
BRI
The short answer is no. (beat) I was there, of course. Rachel and Jess talked about him a lot, especially early on. I know they tried to find him, before you were born, and when you were little. Think they had given up by the time you moved to the UK.
OLIVIA
Yeah.
BRI
Are you angry at them for that?
OLIVIA
No! I mean… Maybe. (beat) Suppose I am a bit.
BRI
Makes sense. You know, I think they really tried their best.
OLIVIA
They probably did. Still. Shouldn’t have been that hard to find him *then*. Now the trail’s gone cold and I’m not sure it will work…
BRI
I think it might have a better chance of success now.
OLIVIA
Really? After all these years?
BRI
(goes slightly into lecturing professor-mode) With the rise of social media and smart phones finding people has never been easier. (beat) What are you going to do once you do find him?
OLIVIA
IF I find him… I… I want to talk to him. Get to know him. He is my parent, after all.
BRI
(doubtful but tries to hide it) Is he now. Hm. (certain) But I think you will find him. And getting to know him is probably a good idea. (gently) Go easy with the expectations, though, Liv.
OLIVIA
(not really listening) I just want to find him.
BRI
You seem to have some good help with that. And Jess and Rachel – are you talking to them?
OLIVIA
Yes. We Skype. They’re… they’re selling the house.
BRI
(gently) I know. And I am sorry.
OLIVIA
(teary-eyed) Thanks. I… I wish… I wish they’d stay together. Ugh. Sound like a child.
BRI
We are all children when relating to our parents.
OLIVIA
I suppose so. Were you… No. You don’t speak to your parents. Sorry.
BRI
Haven’t in twenty years. Wanted to talk to you about that, actually. Went to see them last month.
OLIVIA
(very surprised) You- really?
BRI
Yes. Thought it was time. Hadn’t been in Edmonton since… You heard the voicemails.
OLIVIA
Yeah. (beat) Does mum know?
BRI
Course. She wanted me to tell you.
OLIVIA
So… what did they say?
BRI
They’re old now. In their seventies. And it was so long ago. (emotional) Still in the same house.
OLIVIA
That must have been hard.
BRI
It was, you know. Seeing them was hard, too. So much anger and pain. But it’s been twenty years, you know. I wanted to give them a chance.
OLIVIA
And… what happened?
BRI
I told them about my life, about my work. About Jess. About you. And they… They still can’t accept who I am. But there was a sense of closure, for me.
OLIVIA
Did they know about me?
BRI
No. Jess can be very… absolute. More so than I. I think they were sad not to know you. My… ‘dad’ had read one of Jess’ novels, but of course her author bios say nothing about her personal life.
OLIVIA
That’s right, they don’t. I’m… I’ve never really felt I was missing out not knowing them.
BRI
Look, they’re the ones missing out, Liv. And if you ever want to reach out to them, you can. I will support you in that, and I know Jess will too, though it will be hard for her. But you really don’t have to.
OLIVIA
I… will think about that. Thanks for telling me all this, Bri (Bree).
BRI
Course. And if you think I can be of any help, I am here.
OLIVIA
(smiles) I know.
BRI
You should come have dinner with us soon – maybe bring your friend?
OLIVIA
Tammi. That would be lovely. (beat) So, maybe this is it for today?
BRI
All right.
OLIVIA
Bye listeners!
BRI
Bye!
(Trailer for The Black History Buff)
OLIVIA
If you know anything about my biological father – Mike – please let me know, I would very much like to get in touch with him. (pause) Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find out more about the show, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. We are also on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days. I am so very happy and so grateful to our wonderful amazing patrons! We also have merch – check it out at Y2Kpod.com[slash]merch. Our amazing intro and outro music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 44: NOVEMBER 1-5, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 44.1
OLIVIA
Hello, Olivia here. Exams are in full swing, so I’ll try and o keep this brief. Thank you to those who have e-mailed saying Bri (Bree) *is* an inspiration for you. I have sent all of that on to her. And – not that anyone’s asked! – we have settled on our Halloween costumes for Saturday. Tammi’s idea is that we are going as audio drama characters! She’s borrowing this incredible steampunk dress and top hat from somewhere, and is going as Doctor Petronella Sage – a true science pioneer – also a wonderful time travel show. I am going much more low key – Tammi found me a turquoise puffy cap, and I will be carrying a big matchstick – really a wooden barbecue skewer with some eyeliner on it – and saying ‘It’s not my fault’ as much as possible. Any guesses? (beat) Olivia from Oz 9, of course! A super intelligent AI in a super silly space comedy (smiles). Should be fun! (beat) Right. Time for voicemails. Last week Kat and Johnno got engaged and I talked to aunt Bri (Bree). Welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 44.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hello Jess! I have started wedding planning a little, and I am having so much fun! So I am thinking either here or Trollhättan, of course. Possibly Devon, but Johnno says it’ll probably end up being a power struggle between his parents, so I guess not. Trollhättan is good because it is small and pretty and relatively inexpensive and near my mother. However it would mean an expensive flight for almost all the guests. London is good because most of our friends are here, and it’s easy for people to get to, but also it is ridiculously expensive, of course. We don’t have to decide now, but it’s fun to think about. Either way Johnno probably leans more towards a big wedding and I’m thinking a smaller one. Got the ring back from the jeweler’s, am wearing it right now. It sparkles. Still makes me nervous, though. Suppose I will get used to that. It really is beautiful… We’re doing some Guy Fawkes thing on Sunday, not a big fan of standing around freezing next to a bonfire, but looking forward to the fireworks. Oh, I do love fireworks! Remember the New Year’s displays? Everyone trying to outdo themselves to celebrate the new millennium… It really was a-mazing. Can’t believe that was the last time I saw you! Or, not last, I hope! Latest? Anyway. So much has happened. In some ways I feel like a different person now… I think-
(front door unlocking, opening, footsteps)
JOHNNO
(distant) Kat?
KAT
In here!
JOHNNO
(footsteps, kisses KAT, closer) What’re you up to sweetheart?
KAT
Just voicemailing Jess. I’ll be done in a minute.
JOHNNO
All right. Hello Jess. You must have heard our news by now.
KAT
She has! I was just telling her about our various wedding location ideas.
JOHNNO
(very slightly threatening) What ideas, sweetie?
KAT
Oh the pros and cons of Trollhättan and London. And that it probably won’t be in Devon.
JOHNNO
(dismissive) Sweetheart. We decided on London yesterday.
KAT
Did we? No, we-
JOHNNO
(laughs) You’re being silly, Kat.
KAT
We definitely didn’t decide-
JOHNNO
(kisses KAT) You’re muddling things up sweetie. You know how you get.
KAT
Yeah… No. It wasn’t… Why do you do this?
JOHNNO
(annoyed) Do what? I am just trying to help you.
KAT
Um. (beat) All right. (cajoling) But London is so expensive, sweetie.
JOHNNO
I can afford it. Only the best for my girl! (kisses KAT)
KAT
Yeah, but still. I’m not earning that much, and this apartment’s pretty expensive, so…
JOHNNO
Don’t worry your sweet head over money. I have it covered.
KAT
That’s great, but I still want to contribute-
JOHNNO
(annoyed) I said, I have it covered.
KAT
I know, but, I never have any money, I thought it would be nice if I could-
JOHNNO
(quickly, furious) Money? You want money? (Takes wallet from pocket, gets out bills, throws them at KAT) Here you go! Take it and SHUT UP!
KAT
What- I- You-
JOHNNO
(footsteps, pulls on shoes, jacket) I am going out.
KAT
(crying) Johnno!
(door slams shut, KAT is crying.
(different kind of click)
Scene 44.3
OLIVIA
Hello, this is Olivia, editing. I cut this short – there was another 20 minutes or so of intermittent crying. Nothing else happened, so I cut it out. All right, next voicemail.
Scene 44.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hey Kat. You all right? I heard your… fight. But you know that. I’m sorry this keeps happening. I mean, I’m so sorry you keep having to live through it. I don’t like listening of course, but it doesn’t matter. I’m not the one getting yelled at. (pause) Fuck, Kat, hearing you crying, it… it breaks my heart. (beat) I am here, if you want to talk about it. And if you don’t. (sad smile) I am here either way. All right? All right. (breathes) What else can I tell you… We had a good time at the Halloween thing. Wasn’t a big deal, just kids running around and parents sitting around chatting and drinking tea. But it was nice, and we got talking to some friendly people. And Maia did wonderful face paintings – creepy and spooky of course, but also animals and fairies and whatever the kids wanted. One little boy asked for a spider on one cheek and a pink heart on the other, he was so proud showing it off to everyone, it was adorable. One mom, though… She looked at us, and saw Rachel’s belly of course, and said in this weird sort of hollow voice ‘Life will never be the same. Enjoy it while you can.’ And then she just got up and left. That was the real Halloween scare, let me tell you! And it’s silly – of course we know life will never be the same. But she seemed to be implying that life as we know it would disappear forever, and that can’t be right either. I mean, we’ll still be us, and have our friends, and our jobs, and our hopes and dreams and… everything. We’ll just also have a child to love and teach and learn from and protect and share all of these wonderful things with. And yes I get that our priorities might change, but, they might do that anyway, for other reasons. The more I think about it, the more it makes me angry. What was the point of that? Seems like parents think they belong to this very exclusive club and no-one who isn’t a parent could *possibly* understand. Ugh. They’re like the ‘smug marrieds’ in Bridget Jones only much smugger. You will tell me if I start doing this, right? Don’t want to be one of those… Apart from that we are staying in a lot, I am writing, and Rachel is working from home and resting. It’s nice. Cosy. She seems better now she doesn’t have to be out and about as much. Maia and Tia and Bri (Bree) have been over quite a bit. You know, cooking, talking, drinking lots of tea… Oh yeah. Bri (Bree) has… there’s this guy who hangs around the café who’s been turning up outside her house, in the grocery store, way too many places to be a coincidence. She’s not too bothered yet, he’s kept his distance, but definitely something to watch out for. We shall see. I should go to bed. You take good care of my friend Kat, right? I love you.
(clicks)
Scene 44.5
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
(tired) Oh Jess. Here we go again. This will be short. I’m tired. We made up. Always do. As you know. Don’t know what else to say about it. (pause) We’re going to see Peer Gynt at the Olivier tonight. I am thrilled it is theatre, of course, but I didn’t choose it. That play has always annoyed me. I know it’s Ibsen and I should be on board for Nordic classics but this stupid man who just keeps running away from his problems… Oh well. Maybe it’s a really good production that will convert me to the play’s merits. And then we are back in scheduled-sex territory this week, so… (sighs) I always thought trying for a baby would be fun and exciting, but this is just stressful. Thanks for being there. I will take care. You too, OK? Oceans!
(clicks)
Scene 44.6
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hi Shirin, it’s Jess. Sorry it took me a while to respond. Again… I am so happy everything is good – I could feel your excitement just from your voice. I hope everything continues to be good at your new job – it sounds wonderful. And I hope you find some-
(00s cell phone ringtone)
JESS
(continues) Sorry Shirin! (beat) It’s Rachel, I’ll just get this real quick. (beep) Hello love, I-… You’re wh-… I’ll be right there! I love you! (beep) Shirin I’m so sorry – Rachel’s in hospital – something happened – I have to go – I will e-mail!
(clicks)
Scene 44.7
OLIVIA
Wow. If I didn’t know I am sitting right here I’d be really worried right now. But I am sitting here, and my mama – Rachel – is fine too, I Skyped with her yesterday. So don’t worry too much, listeners. Right. I have to get back to my revising, exams are still happening, and I have to make time for that Halloween party. Happy Halloween, to those that celebrate! And happy October, to everyone else! Talk to you next week.
(Trailer for The Pasithea Powder)
OLIVIA
If you know anything about my biological father – Mike – please let me know, I would very much like to get in touch with him. (pause) Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find out more about the show, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. We are also on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days. I am so very happy and so grateful to our wonderful amazing patrons! We also have merch – check it out at Y2Kpod.com[slash]merch. Our amazing intro and outro music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 45: NOVEMBER 6-12, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 45.1
OLIVIA
(excited) I have news! Very- very exciting news! However, I’m going to make you wait until after the voicemails to tell you. (laughs) But they seem to be quite short this week. I will tell you that I am talking to an exciting guest at the end of the show, so make sure you stick around for that. Right. Last week Kat and Johnno argued again and Rachel was in hospital. Welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 45.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Jess! Got your e-mail! When you have a minute, please let me know what’s going on. On here, or e-mail, I don’t care. You said it’s not critical, but that’s all I know. I’m worried. And I am crossing every finger and toe that Rachel and the baby are fine and this is all just a scare. OK? I love you so much!
(clicks)
Scene 45.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
(from cell phone, hospital waiting room)
JESS
Kat! It’s all right! At least for now. They’ve put Rachel on bed rest – that means she has to stop working entirely until the baby comes. So that’s another… two months. She’s going to stay in hospital for observation for a few days, but after that she can hopefully come home. (breathes) Think I haven’t taken a deep breath in two days. (breathes) They think it will all be fine, as long as she rests. Oh Kat. I thought… For a moment there I thought I might lose them both and I- (breathes) just the thought of it was like I was in freefall. Still is. But all will be fine. Oh god. Loving this much opens up for so much potential pain… Yeah. (beat) Getting dizzy here for a minute. Whoa. Slowing down. (to someone further away) I’m all right. Thanks. (to KAT) Sitting down. Guess I haven’t been eating much lately. Other things going on… Bri (Bree) is meeting me later to drag me out for dinner. (smiles) She knows me so well. She’s been here much more than she should these past few days – she has exams coming up. But she doesn’t seem worried, so I think she’ll be fine. I’d better get back to Rachel. Might keep you updated through e-mail this week – hard to find a quiet spot in the hospital for voicemail recording. Thank you for being there. I miss you. I love you. Oceans and oceans!
(clicks)
Scene 45.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
(from cell phone, outdoor ambience)
KAT
Oh Jess, I am so relieved! Thanks for letting me know. Give Rachel a hug for me, OK? I know we’ve never met but I feel like we have… Of course, e-mail is fine. Whatever works for you. And take care of yourself, please! You won’t be any use to Rachel if you faint from hunger and exhaustion. OK? (deep breath) I’m… walking along the south bank… Should be at work, but… Skipped it today. Needed some breathing space. It’s cold but… still nice somehow. Hardly anyone else out in the middle of the day. I spent the morning in Tate Modern – I really love that all the museums are free. (smiles) They have such… wacky… art installations. I spent about 20 minutes all alone in a dark room watching a video performance where a man was standing on Hampstead Heath inhaling helium gas from balloons and singing (sings) “There’s a God for Little Children” – it was hilarious! I love when art doesn’t take itself too seriously. Suppose I needed to laugh… I know I shouldn’t skip work. Means even less money. (sighs) There never seems to be any time to *think* that’s all. I keep running and running faster and faster and… Yeah. I’ve been doing this… sometimes. Just to get some space for… me. There’s a cinema just off Leicester Square that shows matinées for only a pound – you know, where we went to Sing-Along Sound of Music? Finally got to see Billy Elliott there the other day. Loved sitting there in the dark with no-one knowing where I was… There was hardly anyone else there. Felt like it was just for me. And I’ve been going around the National Portrait Gallery a few times, too. Ugh. Jess… (anguish) What is happening with me? I don’t recognize myself. I don’t… I’m not… My reaction to things, I… feel like I’m not… there… (sighs) It’s hard to explain. I should be getting home. Supposed to be done at work in a bit, and it’s a long walk from here to Chalk Farm! Yeah, I’m saving on bus fares again… I’m walking whenever the weather is OK. Good exercise, really. Take care, my dear. I love you.
(clicks)
Scene 45.5
OLIVIA
(excited) Hello again – I a m back! And very soon I’ll be talking to Cassandra again – she’s found Mike! I am so excited and nervous I don’t quite know what to do with myself. So, over to Cassie, hang on while I connect.
(connecting sounds)
OLIVIA
(continues) Cassie? I can see you but I can’t hear you! (beat) Can you hear me? (beat) OK, turn on the mic. Down to your left… yeah, down there!
CASSANDRA
-don’t know if that-
OLIVIA
That works! Hello!
CASSANDRA
Olivia! Hello! Thank goodness!
OLIVIA
We probably should have practiced that!
CASSANDRA
(smiles) Yeah but more exciting this way!
OLIVIA
(laughs) Also there wasn’t time – we only decided this (beat) about an hour ago.
CASSANDRA
True!
OLIVIA
(same time as CASSANDRA) So, I only know what was in your e-m-
CASSANDRA
(same time as OLIVIA) So let me tell you what I found out-
(BOTH laugh)
OLIVIA
Go ahead! From the beginning, please.
CASSANDRA
So I told you Charlene and I had got as far as Melbourne, right?
OLIVIA
Yes – and I realize I’ve been mispronouncing Melbourne up until now, sorry about that! (tries it out) Melbourne. Melbourne. All right.
CASSANDRA
(laughs) Well, we started writing to all the libraries in Melbourne explaining that we were looking for Mike, and describing what we knew. Didn’t say anything about you, of course, just that someone was keen to get hold of him. Of course, in twenty years, staff changes a lot, so for some of them we got the response back that there was no-one left who had been working there in 2000. But one librarian at the North Melbourne library recalled that there had been a Mike working briefly at the State library around that time. She – her name is Jane – tried to get in touch with a retired colleague of hers, called Ian. Now Ian was on an extended holiday in Indonesia at this time – lovely country, Indonesia, I remem-
OLIVIA
(gently) So I guess Ian came back?
CASSANDRA
(laughs) Sorry! Yes Ian came back to Melbourne a few days ago, and got Jane’s message. He remembered Mike well, turns out they used to volunteer at the same homeless shelter even after Mike had quit working at the library, so they knew each other quite well, and they kept in touch. And he knew Mike’s full name – turns out it’s John Michael Wilson, the ‘John’ is what messed up all of our searches.
OLIVIA
(stunned) Wow.
CASSANDRA
After that it was easy. He lives outside Melbourne. In the Dandenongs. I’ll send you all the contact info.
OLIVIA
I- He- We- (pause, near tears) You found him.
CASSANDRA
(smiles) We did.
OLIVIA
I can’t believe it. After all this time…
CASSANDRA
(gently) I can imagine… Must be a lot to take in all at once.
OLIVIA
Yeah. I can… do you have his e-mail address?
CASSANDRA
Yes. Just e-mailed you everything.
OLIVIA
Thank you. Thank you so much, Cassie.
CASSANDRA
Oh, you’re welcome. It was my pleasure. (beat) So… what is your next step?
OLIVIA
I… I am going to e-mail… Mike. Huh. I’d never thought I’d get there.
CASSANDRA
Now you are. I’ll let you get on with it.
OLIVIA
(focused again) Yes. Thank you. You’ve been such a help.
CASSANDRA
No worries. Let me know how it goes.
OLIVIA
I will! And I’ll let the listeners know too. Bye Cassie, thanks again!
CASSANDRA
Take care, Olivia. Bye!
(Trailer for Sidequesting)
OLIVIA
Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find out more about the show, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. We are also on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days. I am so very happy and so grateful to our wonderful amazing patrons! We also have merch – check it out at Y2Kpod.com[slash]merch. Our amazing intro and outro music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 46: NOVEMBER 13-19, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 46.1
OLIVIA
(nervous) Hello everyone, Olivia here. I had my last exam yesterday, and the term’s ending. It is almost summer and it is glorious. Tammi and I have some fun trips planned before we head back to winter and the northern hemisphere in a few weeks… I… (really nervous) After the voicemails I will be speaking to… someone. I’m pretty sure you can guess who. I… I feel like I would jinx it if I said his name. (sighs) Silly, I know… There have been some e-mails back and forth and… yeah. It is all very exciting, but right now I am so nervous I just feel nauseous. Uh. Better get to it. Last week Rachel was put on bedrest, Jess forgot to eat, Kat skipped work and I talked to Cassie and got those long-awaited contact details. Welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 46.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hey Jess, good to hear Rachel is doing better. Must be really hard for her to not be allowed to do anything… Johnno and I had a bit of a strange evening yesterday. Or I did, mostly. We were at the Soho Itsu, you know I love the conveyor belt sushi and the drinks robot – it is such *fun*! Plus really tasty. Anyway. We were there with a big group as always, and all of a sudden Johnno’s ex shows up, Louise. She’s there with her boyfriend. It’s awkward, of course. Don’t think they’ve seen much of each other since they broke up. And also for me, I have been so jealous that it was almost unreal to meet her and see her as an actual person. But it was brief, and they went to their own table, of course. Before we left, I went to the loo, and… Louise was there. I’m not sure, but it was almost as though she’d been waiting for me. We said awkward hellos, and… Then she said ‘If you ever need to talk, let me know.’ I said ‘OK… thanks.’ And then she said, quickly ‘It’s not you, you know. It’s him. Remember that.’ And then she left. I… I didn’t tell Johnno. I mean, why would I. But I think she was trying to support me, somehow. And that’s nice, I suppose. It was just so *strange*. I mean, she has no reason to. What am I to her, you know? (pause) Right, what else… We’re going to Barcelona over Christmas. My mother will be disappointed, but it’s actually nice to not have to figure out if we should go Sweden or Devon. And, if Devon, who we should stay with. Barcelona will be nice and tension-free, I hope. Plus it’s a little warmer than here, and lovely food, and shopping… Should be good. I real-
(00s cell phone)
KAT
(continues) Number withheld, I should get that, hang on! (beep) Hello?… OK, yes, hello!… Oh… Yes, absolutely… That would be great!… I would love to!… OK… Yes… Thursday…. Let me check my calendar. (picks up calendar) Yes, that works!… (laughs) See you Thursday!… OK, thanks! (click) Jess! I have an audition for Doctors! (laughs) They saw me on EastEnders, isn’t that amazing? It’s a recurring role for a couple of episodes, they’re sending me a script. This is so cool! OK, wow! Keep your fingers crossed on Thursday afternoon! I should go – take care of yourself, and of Rachel, and let me know when you are both home again. Oceans and oceans!
(clicks)
Scene 46.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
CLAIRE
(very uncomfortable) Jess. So. (blurts out) I’m in this program. (pause) There’s a whole lot of shite about God or a ”higher power”. Been questioning that, let me tell you. Yeah. (pause) I’ve been going through all these steps, and… (surprised) It’s been helpful, I think. All kinds of steps… And one of the steps is “making amends”. (unhappy laugh) That’s the one I’m on. Don’t even know what that means, really. Make amends. To add something at the end… An amendment. (exaggerated US accent) My first amendment rights… (more serious) Or yours, I suppose. (pause) It’s Claire. Did I say that? Probably did. (pause) Yeah. So. Right. Making amends. (pause) Look. I- (pause) You- (pause) Ugh. This would be so much easier if I was drunk. (sighs) Look. I know I… hurt you. I never meant to. It just sort of happened. With Rose, I mean. I knew it would hurt you. A lot. So I didn’t tell you. And then it happened again, and I… Didn’t tell you. Again. And then… (long pause) I could feel you drifting away from me, you know? I knew you were thinking of moving away from acting, of doing a master’s somewhere. I felt like I… (emotional) like I wasn’t enough for you anymore. Like you were going to move on to bigger and better… (sad smile) And you did. Much better than me, I am sure. Rose was… there. (beat) Awful thing to say, right? (sighs) I hurt her too. Next on my list of amends… Ugh. (pause) I buggered it all up. (silly voice) ‘Buggering it all up: a Classic Claire Story’. (beat) I should have told you about Rose. I was- I couldn’t bear it. Your pain. Disappointment. So I let you find out later, when I didn’t have to see it. That… that was really shitty. (pause) So I am trying to say I am… (beat, can’t get the word ‘sorry’ out) yeah. About all of it. And if there is anything I can do to… (small laugh) make amends I suppose… you let me know, right? I am working on… being better. Kinder. More like you, really. (laughs) Don’t get smug now! (serious) Take care, Jess. Bye.
(clicks)
Scene 46.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hi Kat, that is so exciting! I am sending every good vibe your way for the audition today! I know you will be fantastic. So Doctors is that new show, right? Haven’t seen it of course, but anything TV would be great for your career. You are getting there, Kat! That door you were talking about is opening! And even if you don’t get it, it’s still a really good sign that they called you. I am so happy for you. (beat) Rachel and I are both home. She doesn’t literally have to stay in bed all day, she can move around a little, but she is mainly going from bed to couch and back again. And the doctors seem confident that as long as she keeps doing that, all will be well. She is… wonderful. You’d expect her to be cranky about all this, and yes of course she snaps sometimes – she’s only human! – but generally she is taking it as it comes and keeping her spirits up. She’s taken up crocheting. She’d never done it before, Maia is teaching her. But she is great at it – I would probably just get frustrated at having to keep track and count and make sure the yarn doesn’t tangle, but she’s already made a hat for the baby – it is adorable. Speaking of baby gear – we are finally biting the bullet and getting some. We wanted to wait – no, *I* wanted to wait. Felt like jinxing it somehow. But we can’t wait forever, so here we are. I am picking up a crib today – I am getting it used – but it is unassembled so Maia’s coming over to help me put it together. (laughs) That is such a *dad* thing to be doing, right? Assembling a crib. (laughs) Assembling a crib and being bad at it! Ready-made joke right there. But this ‘dad’ has friends to help, thank goodness. Let’s see… Have you been keeping up with the Lord of the Rings news? They’re filming in New Zealand – you probably know that! – and every so often the papers are full of some story about the filming. Mainly about the impact on the environment, which I hope they address, but I’m even more interested in the movies themselves – if I still wanted to be an actor I would definitely try to get in there as an extra, just to see what’s going on… But I am *way* too busy – have to take care of Rachel and prepare for baby but also I am *writing*. Thanks for your last revision feedback, as always you know just how to push me in the direction I need to go. I’m on the final stretch – everything is there, in place, I just need to make sure it all fits and makes sense and do some polishing. And then I’ll be done. It’s been such a long writing project that I can’t believe it is almost over. Longest writing project ever for me… First of many, I hope. I’m… I’m sending the screenplay off to some producers. Feels completely nerve-wracking, but how else am I going to know if anyone likes it? Eeeek! Anyways… Um, Claire left a message again. It was… She apologized. Without actually saying she was sorry, typical Claire-style. It was hard to listen to. But also good. The only thing… She seems to be in a twelve-step program of some kind. I never realized, but she must be dealing with… a drinking problem? Have you heard anything about this? You’ve seen her more recently than I have. Of course, she was always a bit weird about alcohol, and always got very drunk, but… Didn’t suspect that it was a serious problem. Could have escalated while she was with Rose, I guess. Rose always was a party-er. I don’t know. But if she is getting support, that is great. I’ll e-mail her. I’d better go, my dear. Let me know how your audition goes – so exciting! I love you.
(clicks)
Scene 46.5
OLIVIA
(very nervous) I’m back. And I am talking to (beat) Mike. Calling him right now. (online call ringtone) H-Hello?
MIKE
(nervous) Hello? Olivia?
OLIVIA
Hello. (pause)
MIKE
(same time as OLIVIA) Nice to-
OLIVIA
(same time as MIKE) How are-
(BOTH laugh nervously)
MIKE
Sorry.
OLIVIA
It’s fine. Um, so you agreed for me to record this, but just let me know if you want me to cut anything out.
MIKE
(warmly) I’m sure it’s all right. Nice to hear your voice.
OLIVA
Yours too.
MIKE
Yeah.
OLIVIA
So we’ve e-mailed, but… I have so many questions.
MIKE
Of course. I do too. But you go first.
OLIVIA
(this is the big one) Did you know about me?
MIKE
No. Not until you e-mailed. (beat) I had no idea. I would have… I don’t know. Tried to be involved somehow.
OLIVIA
Right. That’s nice… (near tears) Or… I don’t know what to say.
MIKE
Hey. Hey, it’s all right. This can’t be easy for you.
OLIVIA
Yeah.
MIKE
Shall I just talk a bit?
OLIVIA
(small sniffle) Yes, please.
MIKE
Well. (beat) I live outside Melbourne, as you know. In the Dandenongs, in a suburb called Olinda, in a house, with Scott. We’ve been together about … eleven years at this point. (small laugh) Like an old married couple, really. Not that we’ve got around to getting married yet. Maybe one day, if we can get our heads together to organize it. Um… I’m a social worker, I work in a hospital, mainly with families and young folk. Scott is a PE teacher. We have two dogs, Charlie is a golden retriever and Gus is a blue heeler. (beat) You like dogs?
OLIVIA
(smiles) I do. Never had one, though. Mama’s allergic.
MIKE
That’s a shame. (beat) Your ma- (stops himself) You could get one now you’re all grown up if you wanted.
OLIVIA
(a little surprised) Yeah. Maybe I could. Need to figure out where I’m going to live first, I suppose.
MIKE
You’re in Auckland, right?
OLIVIA
Yes. But only until June next year. Exchange student.
MIKE
(surprised) Exchange- From where?
OLIVIA
Birmingham. England. I grew up mostly in the UK.
MIKE
Oh. I never- I thought you grew up in Auckland. (smiles) That explains your accent. But wait… your- Rachel is Kiwi, right? But your other mum – oh, so she is British?
OLIVIA
Jess. She’s Canadian.
MIKE
That- (laughs) My head’s spinning now!
OLIVIA
(laughs) It is pretty confusing when you think about it. (beat) (slight paper rustling) I- I made a list. Things I wanted to ask you.
MIKE
(smiles) That is wonderfully organized. All right. Go for it.
OLIVIA
Having a list made me feel less nervous. All right. (nervous) Do you have any children?
MIKE
Apart from you? No.
OLIVIA
(nervous) Did you ever want any?
MIKE
(deep breath) We talked about it. And we never decided against it, more like… I don’t think either of us were too keen on the chaos of babies. Plus we both meet so many young folk through our jobs that maybe we felt we could do more good that way… Not that we ever talked about it like that. Also for us to become parents there would be a fair bit of admin involved, which is not our strong suit. (small laugh) We haven’t even managed to get married, and it’s been legal in Australia for three years…
OLIVIA
(yearning) Sounds like you’re happy together.
MIKE
(smiles) We are.
OLIVIA
(slight paper rustling) And… Are *you* happy?
MIKE
That’s a big question. (thinks) Yes. I love my work. And we- We have a great group of friends. Scott and I are at that point where we’ve worn down each others rough edges a bit, you know? We’re very… comfortable. Spend a lot of time outdoors, in the yard, or walking the dogs… (beat) What do *you* do for fun?
OLIVIA
Well, there’s this podcast (small laugh)… And I love being outdoors, too. I’ve been on some incredible hikes here in New Zealand.
MIKE
Oh, you should come to Melbourne! Great- (backtracking) I mean… If you want, you’d be very welcome to come visit. I know it’s a fair distance, but…
OLIVIA
I… Really?
MIKE
(warmly) Yeah. Really.
OLIVIA
(slowly, smiling) I think I’d like that. We’re – my friend Tammi and I – are flying home mid-December. Haven’t booked my ticket yet. Maybe… If you want?
MIKE
Sure! Just let me know. And you are both welcome, if you like.
OLIVIA
Thank you. (beat) I’ll save my questions for when we can talk face to face, I think.
MIKE
All right. Looking forward to it.
OLIVIA
Yeah. So am I. Is this… shall we stop there for today?
MIKE
All right. Nice talking to you, Olivia.
OLIVIA
You too. I’ll e-mail you.
MIKE
Great. All right. Bye!
OLIVIA
Bye! (online call disconnect sound, deep breath, slightly dazed) That was Mike. He was nice. And I am going to visit him, hopefully. Him and Scott and the dogs. Yeah. I have to go find Tammi, and figure out flights. Talk to you next week, listeners. And thank you, all of you who tried to help me find him. I can’t respond to every e-mail, but I do read them all, and your support through this has been absolutely brilliant. Especially thank you to Cassie, of course, and Charlene, for spending so much energy trying to help this strange girl from a podcast… You really are incredible. Thank you so, so much.
(Trailer for Me and AU)
OLIVIA
Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find out more about the show, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. We are also on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days. I am so very happy and so grateful to our wonderful amazing patrons! We also have merch – check it out at Y2Kpod.com[slash]merch. Our amazing intro and outro music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 47: NOVEMBER 20-26, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 47.1
OLIVIA
Hello listeners, it’s a beautiful day here in Auckland! Tammi is with me today-
TAMMI
Hello!
OLIVIA
And we are heading out on a road trip after this, with Holly and Kai.
TAMMI
Yes, we are going to Hobbiton!
OLIVIA
(smiles) You’ve been talking about this since we got here.
TAMMI
I have, I can’t wait!
OLIVIA
(smiles) I’m excited too. It’s a tour of Hobbiton from all the films, and someone said there is sheep shearing at the end, which I don’t quite understand.
TAMMI
Yeah – that part’s a bit odd. But we’re going to see the tree! Frodo’s and Bilbo’s tree! That makes me so happy.
OLIVIA
But first, we have a podcast to record.
TAMMI
(jokey sigh) Do we have to?
OLIVIA
Yes we do! And we have something to tell the listeners, right?
TAMMI
Yes. (excited) We’re going to stop over in Melbourne on our way home.
OLIVIA
Yes. I’m nervous. Thanks for coming with me, Tammi.
TAMMI
Of course. And I’ll help with the tech stuff.
OLIVIA
I have got better at that. But I’m glad you’re handling it this time. Right. Let’s do some voicemails. Last week Kat was excited about an audition, Jess bought a crib and I talked to Mike. Want to say it Tammi?
TAMMI
Yes. Welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 47.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hey Kat. Hope everything’s good! Still furiously working on my dissertation – the screenplay part is done, I can’t fiddle with it anymore or I think I’ll ruin it. But the other part – I just read some new research that I have to incorporate into the theory, so I have some reworking to do… But it is coming along. We managed to get the crib set up last week – I say we but mainly Maia. I mostly made tea (smiles). We also got some impossibly tiny baby clothes – Rachel is crocheting away so we have loads of little hats and cardigans and booties – but we got some onesies, stuff like that. Rachel’s dad is coming tomorrow to visit for a few days and help out with some more baby prep. He is a really good cook, and he’s offered to make some big batches and fill our freezer, really looking forward to that! Bri (Bree), Maia and Tia come over a lot and cook or bring leftovers, but even the most dedicated friends can’t provide every single meal, so we have been depending on my cooking skills for those days (laughs) Let’s just say there’s been a *lot* of sandwiches! I’d get takeout, but we are trying to live cheaply, so sandwiches it is… But not much longer, thankfully!
(bedroom door opens, very slow labored steps, JESS runs over to help)
JESS
(helps RACHEL to couch) There. Thought you were taking a nap, love.
RACHEL
(small pained sitting down noises) Couldn’t sleep. Thoughts swirling around. S’all right. Come talk to me?
JESS
(sits down) Of course. What’s up?
RACHEL
I’ve been thinking about what the baby should call us.
JESS
Oh yeah. We were going to figure that out.
RACHEL
Other friends who’ve had babies have gone with their names. Or ‘mum’ and ‘mummy’ and variations of that. Or just let the kid figure it out. (beat) That seems confusing, though.
JESS
Yeah that’s probably not for us. Though whatever we decide the kid might decide something different, you know?
RACHEL
(laughs) Oh yes. (starts laughing) Look! The baby is hiccupping again!
JESS
(laughs) That is equal parts adorable and disturbing. Still can’t believe baby hiccups make your belly *visibly move*. It’s a little ‘Alien’, you know?
RACHEL
(laughs) It is! Our little alien baby.
JESS
(laughs) I love you. Both of you. (kisses RACHEL)
RACHEL
I love you too. (beat) So, what do you think? You a mommy? Or just Jess?
JESS
Hm. I don’t know.
RACHEL
I always called my mother ‘mama’.
JESS
That’s nice. My mom was ‘Mom’… Not sure I’d want to link this to her. Do not want to emulate her parenting.
RACHEL
Of course not. And you won’t. ‘Mommy’?
JESS
Not feeling like a mummy. (spooky voice) The Mummy Returns…
RACHEL
(laughs) All right. (beat) I know – you can be ‘mum’!
JESS
Mum. Mum… Yeah, I like that.
RACHEL
Good. That’s settled. At least we know where to start. Not sure where we’ll end up.
JESS
The kid’ll probably call us both zombie or something.
RACHEL
(laughs) Well, if they do, we’ll wear that name with pride.
JESS
We absolutely will. I’m going to go write some more, you want anything?
RACHEL
I’m good. I’ll watch TV for a bit.
(TV clicks on, commercial with happy music)
KAT
-and that’s why Frosty Cakes will astonish your friends every time – delicious cakes, scrumptious frosting. Frosty – Bake Someone Happy.
JESS
(midway through commercial) That’s Kat!
RACHEL
What?
TV ANNOUNCER
(music) And now on One, the six o’clock news with-
JESS
(excited) That was Kat! The commercial!
RACHEL
Oh! Wow, that is great.
(TV clicks off)
JESS
(realizes) And she must have heard it! (to KAT) Kat! Did you hear that? That was you! Your voice coming all the way over here… I’ve only heard it once since the first time, and I’ve been trying to catch it so Rachel could hear your voice.
RACHEL
(to KAT) That was really cool, Kat!
JESS
(laughs) Well she is a really cool cat. (to KAT) I should really go write now. Let me know what’s up with you – how was the audition? Love you! Oceans of hugs!
RACHEL
Bye, Kat! (to JESS) Could you get my crochet-
(clicks)
Scene 47.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
(outdoor ambience)
KAT
Oh Jess. I’m out walking around the city instead of working again. I really couldn’t face it today. I… I got my period today. (crying) It was almost a week late, and I- I thought it had worked this time. Of course I though that. I was going to buy a pregnancy test today, I was saving it… (cries) I was so sure, Jess. How am I supposed to do this? Months and months of… hoping and dreaming and all those hopes just washed away by stupid blood. Every single month reliving the miscarriage. WHY can’t my body do this? What am I doing wrong? (wails) Oh Jess. It is so hard. So. Hard. (beat) I’m on the steps to St Paul’s. Not many people around in the daytime. (sighs) I have more bad news. I didn’t get the part in Doctors. I know they auditioned a handful of people, and I am sure whoever got it was a ‘better fit’ or whatever, but… Doesn’t help. I liked that part. And I felt like I did a good job. Sometimes when I audition I don’t feel it, you know. Like, I’d be surprised if they cast me because I am so clearly not right for this. And then sometimes it all flows and I connect with the character and I feel YES this is working. This was one of those times… Anyway. Hard day today. Thus steps of St Paul’s. Getting really cold though, I should get walking again so I don’t freeze to this spot… I- I loved hearing you and Rachel discuss what the baby will call you. You really are lovely together. And you heard my TV ad! *I* heard my TV ad! That was amazing. Also yes, Claire… Last few times I’ve seen her have been down the pub, and yes she has gotten very very drunk very very quickly. Don’t think she used to do that. (thinks) No, she definitely didn’t use to do that. But she was always a loud party person who liked drinking so guess I didn’t really clock the difference… I knew she wasn’t happy, so… Yeah. But if she’s getting help, that’s good. (beat) I feel better. Always feel better talking to you. (sighs) Might head across to Tate Modern to warm up. Now if only the Millennium Bridge was open I could use that, but who knows when they’ll open that back up. I didn’t try it before it closed, but people said it was swaying a lot, which is *not* what you want a bridge to do… Anyway. I’ll go the long way around. Plenty of time. I love you. Oceans of hugs!
(clicks)
Scene 47.4
OLIVIA
And we’re back – hello!
TAMMI
Hello! Kat seems unhappy again. Keep waiting for her to catch a break, you know?
OLIVIA
Yes. I have to keep reminding myself she is OK now…. My parents were sweet, though.
TAMMI
Yes! They seem so great together.
OLIVIA
(a bit emotional) Yeah. That’s why it’s so hard…
TAMMI
I’m sorry. Of course. How- I mean, what’s happening when you go home?
OLIVIA
Well, they’re having trouble selling the house. So we will all have Christmas there.
TAMMI
All three of you?
OLIVIA
Yeah. They’re not angry or anything, they just… don’t want to stay together. (emotional pause). Let’s talk about something else.
TAMMI
All right. (beat) We’re off to Hobbiton in a minute!
OLIVIA
(smiles) Yes. We definitely are. And it will be fun.
TAMMI
Yes. I’m so excited!
OLIVIA
(smiles) Me too. Time to wrap this up?
TAMMI
Yes. Bye!
OLIVIA
Bye!
(Trailer for Tabletop Roulette)
OLIVIA
Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find out more about the show, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. We are also on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days. I am so very happy and so grateful to our wonderful amazing patrons! We also have merch – check it out at Y2Kpod.com[slash]merch. Our amazing intro and outro music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 48: NOVEMBER 27-30, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
CONTENT WARNING
OLIVIA
Hello listeners, this week we have a content warning for emotional and sexual abuse. We have a resource page on the website, where we have tried to list as many hotlines and info-pages and support things we could find. So if you feel you need any resources like that, go to y2Kpod.com[slash]resources and hopefully you will find it there. Please take care of yourself, and if you need to, don’t be afraid to reach out and ask for help.
Scene 48.1
OLIVIA
Hello listeners. I am all done with uni and I passed all my exams. So summer holidays! Except once I go h- (beat) home it’ll be winter. (sighs) Yeah. But it will not be all cold and dark, it will also be fairy lights and Christmas trees and wrapping presents… So not all bad. (beat) We had a lovely time in Hobbiton – Holly knows someone with connections, so we got discounted tickets, which was lucky as they are so expensive – 84 dollars for one person! New Zealand dollars, of course, but still very expensive… No sheep shearing – whoever said that must have gone a while back, they told us they stopped doing that years ago. But we got to see Bilbo’s hobbit hole – well, his door, really, and Sam’s, and the clearing with that big beautiful tree – apparently that was central when they were location scouting for the film, finding the right tree… It really was magical. (beat) Time for some voicemails, right? Last week Kat was feeling awful on the steps of St Paul’s, and Rachel and Jess were figuring out what… (smiles) *I* should call them. Welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 48.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hello Jess! Some good news today – I have an agent! Or… a new one. (smiles) But my old one as you know was pretty useless, so I am very excited! And they approached me, which feels good… Also they have already set me up for an audition next week – it’s for a TV ad, so not terribly exciting, but still… Didn’t have to hunt it down myself! (beat) I’m sorry I keep being so damned miserable all the time. I’m… I’m a little better today. I even went to work! (beat) So that’s good. Johnno’s at a gig, I don’t know when he’ll be home. I should have joined him, really, I was just so tired… (sighs) How can I be so tired all the time? I don’t know… Maybe-
(front door unlocks, opens, footsteps)
JOHNNO
(high energy, annoyed, yelling. distant) Kat! Where are you?
KAT
(yelling) In here! Record-
JOHNNO
(yelling, distant) Come in here!
(footsteps, both distant from here on)
KAT
Johnno! What’s going on?
JOHNNO
(takes off boot, throws one on floor, slight grunt noises as bending down) Gig was shite. (throws other boot on floor)
KAT
What happened?
JOHNNO
(angry, quickly) What do you care? You weren’t even there.
KAT
Of course I care, why would you a-
JOHNNO
(angry) If you cared, you would have come.
KAT
That’s not-
JOHNNO
(screams) I am so fucking tired of you and your fucking excuses!
KAT
Wha-
JOHNNO
(mimics, quickly) Wa-wa-wa-wa-wa-wa… (screams) SHUT THE FUCK UP! (very long pause, seductively) You like that, don’t you? (closer to KAT) You like being told what to do? (kisses KAT intensely for a while, she does not respond, annoyed) Oh come on KAT! I am *trying* to make it all better!
KAT
(small dead voice) I’m not- I’m still on my period.
JOHNNO
(zipper sound, husky voice) That is not a problem, sweetie…
(different kind of click)
Scene 48.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
(worried but careful) Kat! You all right? I am so sorry. Does… does that happen a lot? ‘Cause I am thinking maybe if it does, it could feel… normal for you maybe? But from the outside, can I just tell you, that is not normal. He shouldn’t scream at you, and he definitely shouldn’t force you into sex you do not want. That is bad. I think… You need to- This is not good for you. Can I help you with anything? (beat) Can I… call anyone? You know Shirin would probably let you stay in her room if you need to get away for a bit, right? Maybe take a break? (beat) You know what? I am going to e-mail Shirin today and check that, just in case. If you need it. And if you don’t need it, great. (beat) Right. I should be writing. (laughs) I always say that, don’t I? Handing it in next week, so after that you won’t have to hear it again… ‘Til I start the next project, of course… Rachel is resting. Pretty much always is, these days. Still keeping her spirits up to an amazing degree, and when she doesn’t it’s pretty easy to forgive her. I mean, I’d be in such a foul mood in her shoes… her compression socks, more like… We just have to make sure she and the baby are all right until due date, or right before. January 14. Our baby will be born in 2001. (smiles) No space odyssey though. Maybe when they’re grown up. Who knows what the world will be like then… Oh, Kat. It is all so abstract. I am so wrapped up with taking care of Rachel and finishing this damned dissertation that I hardly think about the baby, and they will be here in… six weeks? That is nuts. I-
(doorbell)
JESS
(goes to open door, happy) Bri (Bree)! Maia!
MAIA
I know we’re early, sorry.
JESS
No worries – you are always welcome!
BRI
Here.
(Hands bag of groceries to JESS, who starts unpacking them)
JESS
Thank you so much, sib. Oh, you brought your guitar?
BRI
Came straight from work. (sets guitar down)
RACHEL
(muffled) Come say hello!
JESS
Yes, go say hi to Rachel, and let me finish up my voicemail.
BRI
Hi Kat!
MAIA
Hello Kat!
(MAIA and BRI to bedroom, footsteps, their conversation is distant)
JESS
(to KAT, keeps getting distracted by the other conversation and going quiet) Right. Where was I? (beat) Can’t remember.
RACHEL
Hello!
BRI
(smiles) Hi.
MAIA
How are you doing today?
RACHEL
All right. (laughs) Bored! Tell me everything you’ve been up to.
MAIA
I’ve been at Town Hall seeing them winch up my Fire Woman to suspend her from the ceiling. It was completely nerve-wracking, but now she is in place for tomorrow.
JESS
I think we’ve gotten everything together for the baby – and Rachel’s dad has packed our freezer with delicious meals.
RACHEL
I wish I could go! This is such a big thing for you. Can’t believe I won’t be there.
MAIA
I know. It sucks.
BRI
We’ll take lots of pictures.
RACHEL
Thank you.
JESS
He said all we’ll need in the first few months is towels, onesies and a big pile of diapers – though he said nappies of course – and those I know we have… Rachel’s parents should know, they have loads of kids – and grandkids. (sighs)
MAIA
And in just a few months you’ll be able to go see her yourself – she’ll be there permanently.
RACHEL
Six weeks. (sighs) Six. Weeks. Counting down… Distract me! What else is happening?
JESS
My parents… They won’t ever be grandparents, I suppose. Or, technically they will, but… I will not reach out. They have had so many chances, and I am… I have enough with everything else. I-
MAIA
Oh – I forgot in all the excitement – I’ve been accepted to the teaching post-grad!
RACHEL
That is wonderful!
BRI
Congratulations!
JESS
(calls) Maia, that is great, congratulations!
MAIA
Thanks. I’m a little nervous.
JESS
You’ll be fine. (to RACHEL) You want to come in here, love, or stay in bed?
RACHEL
Sofa, please.
(Everyone helps RACHEL get to couch. Small pained exertions from RACHEL. MAIA and BRI sit down)
JESS
Want anything? Water?
RACHEL
That’d be good.
JESS
Bri (Bree)? Maia?
BRI
I’m good.
MAIA
I’m OK.
(footsteps, JESS pours glass of water)
RACHEL
How about you Bri (Bree), what’s going on with you?
BRI
I’m working full-time at the café now school is done. Gerrie is travelling. (beat) My stalker-guy has disappeared.
JESS
(coming back with water, gives to RACHEL, sits down) Really? That’s great!
BRI
Can’t be sure, but I think he’s transferred his attentions elsewhere. It wasn’t dangerous, I think. Just creepy. Guess he got tired of getting ignored.
JESS
Yeah. I hate that you had to deal with that.
BRI
(shrugs) Hm. I manage. (beat) Actually… I wrote a new song yesterday.
JESS
You wanna tell us about it?
BRI
It’s called ‘Maladaptive Daydream’. (beat) I can play it for you? (grabs guitar)
MAIA, RACHEL & JESS
(enthusiastic agreement)
(Song – Malaptive Daydream)
MAIA, RACHEL & JESS
(applause)
JESS
(teary-eyed) Oh that is so beautiful, sib.
BRI
(smiles) Yaaay.
RACHEL
That is wonderful.
MAIA
You are amazing.
BRI
Glad you like it.
JESS
(remembers) Oh, and now Kat got to hear it too, I love that! I should probably go say goodbye to her. (footsteps)
BRI
We should get started on dinner Maia. (to kitchen area)
MAIA
(gets up) Yes!
RACHEL
Thank you! What marvelous dish are you serving today?
MAIA
Dumplings.
RACHEL
Oh, fantastic.
JESS
(from computer) Oh wow! Remember the first time we made dumplings?
BRI
(laughs) Not quite your thing, sib. (meal prep sounds for remainder of scene)
RACHEL
(smiles) That *was* a memorable night…
JESS
(to RACHEL) Most definitely. (to KAT) Right, Kat! This is probably my most disjointed voicemail yet. But you got to hear Bri’s (Bree’s) song! And… (serious) I love you. I want you to be happy. Oceans of hugs.
BRI
(lots of cabinets being opened) Hey, sib, where do you keep the-
(clicks)
Scene 48.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
(tired, unemotional) Hey Jess. Didn’t mean for you to hear that. As usual. (sighs) I just… I get distracted, you know? Forget you’re there. But that’s… yeah. (pause) It happens. I should have gone with him to that gig. (pause, then sigh, slight smile) It was nice hearing Bri’s (Bree’s) new song. She’s really good. Much better than Johnno’s shitty band. (aghast, hand to mouth) Fuck! Shouldn’t have said that. Forget I said that. They’re good. Bri (Bree) just makes more my kind of songs, I guess. I will be fine, Jess. Promise. Everything is a bit stressful right now, with trying to get pregnant, and wedding planning, and Johnno’s stressed at work. And there’s some conflict in his band – the lead singer wants to quit, apparently. It will all calm down soon, I’m sure. I should go, Johnno will be home soon. Oceans and oceans.
(clicks)
Scene 48.5
OLIVIA
Hello again, I’m back… So that was really horrible. I can’t… Why would Kat stay with him? Why *did* she? I get that he’s manipulating her but… Yeah. (shudders) Anyway. I am going to sign off now so I can go enjoy the beautiful sunshine. Tammi and I are heading to the beach! To Mission Bay this time, haven’t been yet, but it’s a glorious day, and it’s bound to be beautiful. Just have to make sure I get some more suncream on the way – I’ve run out and I burn really easily. Talk to you next week!
(Trailer for Light Hearts)
OLIVIA
Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find out more about the show, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. We are also on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days. I am so very happy and so grateful to our wonderful amazing patrons! We also have merch – check it out at Y2Kpod.com[slash]merch. Our amazing intro and outro music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 49: DECEMBER 1-10, 2000
CONTENT WARNING
OLIVIA
(a little shaken) So this week we have content warnings for emotional abuse and homophobia. We have a resource page on the website, where we have tried to list as many hotlines, info-pages and support things we could find. So if you feel you need any resources like that, go to y2Kpod.com[slash]resources and hopefully you will find it there. Please take care of yourself, and if you need to, don’t be afraid to reach out and ask for help.
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 49.1
OLIVIA
Hello listeners! Olivia here, making the most of summertime before travelling to colder climes next week. We had a great time in Mission Bay last week – actually went again yesterday and rented some sea kayaks. It was great fun, but today my arms really hurt. (smiles) I have also e-mailed with (slight hesitation) Mike, and all is arranged for our visit next week. Tammi and I were flying via Melbourne anyway, so we could book a 20-hour layover… One of those nightmare bookings that people really try to avoid! (deep breath) I am nervous. Really nervous. (beat) But I am sure it will all be great. So, last week Johnno was awful again and Bri (Bree) played a song. Welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 49.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
(excited) Jess! Hello! So I was talking to my mother just now and she asked me what I wanted for Christmas. We won’t see each other this year as you know, Johnno and I are going to Barcelona. She’ll be here for a conference in February, so we’ll be all right, I think. So we were talking about things that could either be easily sent, or that we could pay for, and then all of a sudden she says “Do you want to visit Jess in New Zealand?” and I was like, yeah, of course, if it wasn’t so expensive, thinking she was joking but… No joke! She is actually willing to pay for a plane ticket to Auckland! Which is amazing! So, can I come? I know you’ll have a new baby to take care of, and I promise I’ll help as much as I can and I won’t be in the way, I’d just really really like to see you! After New Year’s at some point, whenever it makes sense for you, and Rachel of course? I have to run to work, talk to you later! Love you!
(clicks)
Scene 49.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Kat, of course! Come! That is wonderful news! I can’t wait to see you! Wow! Um, and as far as timing goes… well anytime, really. After the baby’s born, maybe give us a month to get over the shock, so, March? Or later, but I want to see you, so sooner is better! Oh Kat. I miss you. So much. This year… It’s been incredible, mostly, but also… I have missed you a lot. (beat) People talk about friendship like it’s not important. Like all that matters is romantic love. They say “You can always find new friends”. But friends aren’t interchangeable. (smiles) And, you know, statistically, romantic love ends much more often than friendships do. I don’t know where I would be without your support. So dearest Kat, please come visit me. I cannot wait to see you. Oh, and Shirin says of course you can stay in her room if you need to get away for a bit. She’s coming home soon, but says you can stay on their couch if you need to as well. All right? Just in case. I miss you. I love you. I am so excited to see you!
(clicks)
Scene 49.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
(sound of shower running)
KAT
(rushed, happy) Hi Jess! I just have a few minutes – Johnno’s in the shower – we’re off to the theatre tonight. Romeo and Juliet. That play has always annoyed me. Or not so much the play, but the idea people have that it’s romantic. I mean, it is two silly teenagers who commit suicide because they can’t communicate properly. It’s tragic. And ridiculous. Anyway. I’ve heard good things about this production, so should be OK. And, the main thing: yes! I will come in March! So excited! Should probably start looking at tickets soon, so-
(shower stopped during previous, bathroom door opens, barefoot footsteps)
JOHNNO
Tickets for what, sweetie?
KAT
(excited) Oh! I haven’t told you yet! My mother is buying me a plane ticket to Auckland for Christmas!
JOHNNO
(surprised) Oh. (starts getting dressed)
KAT
(excited) Isn’t it exciting? I’ve never been that far away before!
JOHNNO
(cold) And when were you going to tell me about this?
KAT
(excited) I just found out today – I’m telling you now.
JOHNNO
(annoyed) And when are you leaving?
KAT
(excited) Don’t know yet, we’re talking about March.
JOHNNO
(annoyed) Right. And for how long?
KAT
(excited) Well, if I go that far away I should stay for a little while, right? I- (suddenly catches on to JOHNNO’s mood) Wait, are you OK?
JOHNNO
(done dressing, sarcastic) Of course. My fiancée is gallivanting across the globe without telling me, but yes, it’ s all fine and great. (beat) Of course I’m not OK, Kat. You make plans without including me.
KAT
(crestfallen) Oh. I’m sorry. You’re right. I didn’t think.
JOHNNO
(sighs) You never do.
KAT
But it’s *Jess*. If I can go see her, I will. Of course let’s figure out the best time for me to go, together, you and I, but… I can’t *not* go.
JOHNNO
Can’t you?
KAT
No. I mean, I haven’t seen her in a year, and she’s my closest friend… You know how much she means to me.
JOHNNO
And what about me? What do I mean to you, Kat?
KAT
(emotional) You mean so much. You know that.
JOHNNO
More than Jess?
KAT
It’s different. You are my boyf- fiancé. I want to share my life with you. But Jess – and my other friends – are very important to me.
JOHNNO
For fuck’s sake, Kat. We’re supposed to be getting married. Aren’t we?
KAT
Of course we are. Why would you say that?
JOHNNO
Because I am thinking if you can’t even decide who is more important between your husband-to-be and your fucking *friends* then WHY should we get married?
KAT
Johnno! I lov- I want to be with *you*.
JOHNNO
(mocking, quickly) What? You “love” me? Doesn’t mean anything, you say it all the time to your neurotic friend.
KAT
She’s not- What-
JOHNNO
(cold quick anger) Or are you just a closeted lezzie and you’ve been in love with her this whole time?
KAT
That’s bonkers, we’re friends-
JOHNNO
(cold quick anger) You disgust me. If you can’t put me and our relationship first even this once, we can’t be together.
KAT
(shocked) What? Wait. You-
JOHNNO
(cold quick anger) You have to choose. Where do your priorities lie, Kat?
KAT
I can’t *choose* between you and Jess. That’s nuts. Why do you-
JOHNNO
(icy calm) That’s your decision, then. (starts putting on jacket and shoes) You’d better not be here when I get back.
KAT
(cries) Johnno, I- (door slams, silence, KAT starts opening closet, throwing clothes into bag, bag zips, puts on shoes, jacket, whispers) Fuck. (footsteps, by computer, dazed) Can’t believe it’s still recording. Trusty old Free Online Voicemail… (louder) Jess? You… heard that. I have to go. I’m going to the flat, in Wood Green… I’ll text Emma from the bus. Will you e-mail Shirin for me? I- (big sob) I love you. (sob cut off halfway)
(clicks)
Scene 49.5
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
(crying) Kat! I heard. You know that. I’m here. Always here. I e-mailed Shirin straight away, everything’s fine. You’ll be fine. I know you will. It’ll take time. But you will be absolutely fine. And… it breaks my heart that everything is so difficult for you. But, I think, soon, things will start getting better again. I love you so much. (beat) Handed in my dissertation today. Quite a big moment, actually. Anyways. Message or e-mail me whenever, you know. I love you so much. And I will give you the biggest hug ever in March.
(clicks)
Scene 49.6
OLIVIA
Oh wow. She really did it. Or… he did it. Johnno. I never would have thought… But, who cares. Hope I don’t have to hear from that waste of space again. Huh. Not how I thought this would play out. (deep breath) Right. I have to go pack, my aunt Bri (Bree) and uncle Antonio are taking me to Rotorua this week-end to visit my grandparents. Sort of a pre-holidays gift exchange thing. And yes, Bri (Bree) is not related to them, but I think the family has basically adopted her over the years. They make sure to see each other when they can. So I have to get ready. I… haven’t said anything in a long time about how many voicemails are left, have I? I checked today, and they end in a few weeks. As the year ends. Fitting, I suppose. Or I’d have to change the name of the podcast. ‘Y2K1’ or something (laughs). Right. Really going now. (very excited) Talk to you next week – (nervous) from Melbourne!
OLIVIA
Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find out more about the show, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. We are also on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days. I am so very happy and so grateful to our wonderful amazing patrons! We also have merch – check it out at Y2Kpod.com[slash]merch. Our amazing intro and outro music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 50: DECEMBER 11-17, 2000
CONTENT WARNING
Hello, Olivia here with a content warning. The voicemails this week contain descriptions of a loved one dying, and of racism. We have a resource page on the website, where we have tried to list as many hotlines, info-pages and support things we could find. So if you feel you need any resources like that, go to y2Kpod.com[slash]resources and hopefully you will find it there. Please take care of yourself, and if you need to, don’t be afraid to reach out and ask for help.
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 50.1
(Living room ambience, window open, summer, some birdsong, a few barking dogs)
OLIVIA
(nervous) Hello and welcome to the Y2K podcast – we are in the Dandenongs, just outside Melbourne, Australia! Tammi and I arrived this morning and we are at Mike and Scott’s house – hello!
MIKE
Hello!
SCOTT
Hello!
OLIVIA
And Tammi is here, as well, of course. (pause) Say hello, Tammi!
TAMMI
(a little distant, distracted) Sorry – hi!
OLIVIA
Everything OK, Tammi?
TAMMI
(a little distant) Yes! Go ahead.
OLIVIA
Thanks. (more nervous) Right. Mike, it’s you I’ve come to meet. Mainly.
MIKE
(warmly) Glad to meet you, Olivia.
OLIVIA
You can- you can call me Liv, if you want. That’s what my… family calls me.
MIKE
(smiles) All right. Liv. That’s nice.
OLIVIA
(nervous, polite) You have a beautiful home. How long have you lived here?
SCOTT
Um, about three years.
MIKE
Yeah, about time to move on, I suppose.
OLIVIA
Why? Aren’t you happy here?
SCOTT
Rental lease is up soon. Oh, it’s such a headache.
MIKE
We’ll figure it out.
OLIVIA
(slightly confused, still nervous) All right. (beat) So… Just so I know what you know. Have either of you listened to the podcast?
MIKE
(apologetically) I started, but I have a hard time focusing on podcasts, any podcast, not just yours, and the radio too… I haven’t gotten very far I’m afraid.
SCOTT
(affectionately) He’s hopeless. I’ve listened up to somewhere in July. And I think I filled Mike in on the basics.
TAMMI
(a little distant) Mike, try doing something with your hands, like, play a game on your phone or something.
MIKE
(smiles) Thanks! I’ll have to try something like that.
OLIVIA
All right. (long pause)
SCOTT
Why don’t I let you two talk. (to TAMMI) You need to stay Tammi, or you want to come meet the dogs? (gets up)
TAMMI
Oh, this should be all right. I love dogs! (gets up, to OLIVIA) Don’t touch anything.
OLIVIA
(smiles) I won’t.
SCOTT
Yeah yeah yeah, watch that step.
(footsteps, doors to yard slide open, closed again, intermittent happy barking, TAMMI and SCOTT laughing during following)
SCOTT
(distant) Here’s my boys, Hello Charlie, Hello Gus…
OLIVIA
(nervous again) Right.
MIKE
(gently) Do you have your list, maybe?
OLIVIA
(near tears) You know I… I lost it somehow. Couldn’t find it when I was packing, I looked everywhere.
MIKE
S’all right. We’ll make do.
OLIVIA
Not like me to just misplace things. Suppose I am a little stressed.
MIKE
All right.
OLIVIA
Oh, it’s a lot. You know. But I am happy to meet you.
MIKE
(smiles) Happy you came. (beat) So… You want me to tell you how I met Rachel?
OLIVIA
Yes. I mean, I know some of it, but, yes. Please.
MIKE
It’s not a long story, really. We were at that conference – I was working as a library assistant at the time, hadn’t figured out what I wanted to do with my life. I must have been… 20 – that’s your age, right?
OLIVIA
Yes. Almost 20.
MIKE
I was a bit of a mess. I was fresh out of school, I didn’t see the point of uni, I just wanted to float around and do nothing… My parents weren’t having any of that, though. My dad was a librarian, he got me that job. Nepotism, right? Yeah. I was surprised how much I enjoyed the work, actually… Anyway. I wasn’t supposed to go to that conference, my dad was. But he got sick right before, and no-one else wanted to go, so I said ‘Sure’ – I’d never been to Wellington, so it was pretty exciting. And then I met Rachel at the bar that first night – she was so beautiful. (beat) I’m sure she still is. (beat) You look a bit like her – different hair color though.
OLIVIA
(smiles) Yes. I’ve always wanted red hair.
MIKE
Yours is beautiful too. (realizes) Suppose you got the brown from me… (a little overwhelmed) Yeah. Anyway. Rachel was so easy to talk to, and, you know, older than me. I thought she was really glamourous. I was stunned she wanted to hang out with me, even for a night. (beat) And then, the next morning, I got a call from my mum. (emotion creeps in) My dad was sick – it wasn’t just flu like we’d thought – it was really serious. So I rebooked my ticket and I came home that day. (a little teary) Sorry. This is really hard to talk about, even though it’s so long ago.
OLIVIA
I’m sorry.
MIKE
It’s all right. (deep breath) I quit my job to help take care of him. Suppose that’s when I grew up, really. He… he died in August that year. Still miss him. (teary smile) Sorry. Didn’t expect to be this emotional.
OLIVIA
It’s fine. I am very sorry to hear that.
MIKE
Thanks. (deep breath) After that I decided what I wanted to do was help people. I started uni for social work that following autumn. Got my life together, I suppose.
OLIVIA
Do you have any siblings?
MIKE
No. Just me. (beat) There’s my mum, though. Haven’t told her about you – yet – but I bet she’d love to meet you some time. If you want.
OLIVIA
Um. Of course. Maybe not right away, though.
MIKE
Yeah. Get used to this first, maybe. (gently) So, last we talked you asked if I was happy. Are *you* happy?
OLIVIA
(taken aback) Yes. No… Sometimes?
MIKE
We don’t have to talk about it.
OLIVIA
No, I.. I want to. I suppose Scott has told you my parents are (beat) divorcing?
MIKE
Yeah, he mentioned it. There was so much else to take in, though… Must be hard on you.
OLIVIA
Yeah.
MIKE
They fighting?
OLIVIA
No. They are being very… I don’t know. (emotional) I don’t even understand why they don’t want to be together anymore.
MIKE
Suppose you never can, from the outside.
OLIVIA
(vaguely disappointed) No… But you and Scott are happy together, right?
MIKE
We are. But… (thinks) There are no guarantees in life, O-, (smiles) Liv. Just because we make each other happy today doesn’t mean we will make each other happy tomorrow w. We want to, which means we hopefully will, but… people change. And sometimes they change in ways that means they are happier apart.
OLIVIA
(still vaguely disappointed, a little hesitantly) My aunt Ina (EE-na) says just because love ends doesn’t mean it wasn’t great. I’ve been thinking about that.
MIKE
Your aunt Ina (EE-na) sounds very wise.
OLIVIA
Yes. I just… don’t want it to end (small sob escapes).
MIKE
Of course you don’t. I am so sorry.
OLIVIA
Thanks. I… (doesn’t know how to continue, sighs)
MIKE
Listen, Liv. You have your parents, and you have to sort through these feelings with them, I think. (pause) I… I’m sad I wasn’t there when you were growing up. But it seems you had a happy childhood.
OLIVIA
(teary smile) I did.
MIKE
I’m glad. I can’t give you advice really, we don’t know each other properly. But I’m happy to listen, if you like. And I would like to get to know you, if you’ll let me.
OLIVIA
(small sniffle) I’d like that.
MIKE
(smiles) Good. Me too.
SCOTT
(distant) Come on Charlie, come here Gus, who’s a good dog, yes you are. (dogs bark, TAMMI laughs)
(door from yard slides open, SCOTT, TAMMI and two excited dogs enter. Door closes. Happy barking)
MIKE
Aw, hello boys, hello, how you doin? Oh who’s a good boy, who’s a good boy, yeah, good boys!
SCOTT
You two about ready for lunch?
OLIVIA
I think so.
SCOTT
Hope you like tofu!
TAMMI
(slightly out of breath) Yeah, we do!
MIKE
(to dogs) All right, all right, off you go, go on!
(SCOTT to kitchen, dogs follow)
MIKE
We can talk more later if you want?
OLIVIA
Yes. I think… Tammi, can we listen to the voicemails and record the outro chat from the hostel tonight?
TAMMI
Absolutely.
MIKE
Right. I’ll go help Scott. (gets up, footsteps)
OLIVIA
(calls after MIKE) We’ll be right there… OK. Um. What did they do last week, Tammi?
TAMMI
(slightly distant) Um. Right… (paper rustling) Last week Johnno broke up with Kat and Jess handed in her dissertation. You want me to say it?
OLIVIA
Thanks.
TAMMI
(slightly distant) Welcome to the year 2000!
(dogs barking, cut off)
Scene 50.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
(drained, has been crying for days) Hi Jess. I’m at the flat. In Shirin’s room. Thanks for all the e-mails. (sniffle) Shirin sent me a lovely long one too, trying to distract me with tales of her exciting New York life. And my mother’s been calling and texting and e-mailing every day… Everyone’s been so kind. Emma and Lee and even Claire have been amazing, making sure I eat, and listening, when I’m up for talking. I’ve mostly been curled up in bed, crying, though. Called in sick at work. Don’t think I’ve ever cried this much… Can’t believe he… gave up on us. (small sob) Haven’t heard from him since… you know. Keep thinking I should text, but… What would I say? He was very clear. Suppose I have to go get the rest of my things at some point… (cries) Oh Jess. I can’t believe this is happening. I thought… I meant to be with him forever. I… tried so hard. (cries) We were supposed to go to Barcelona tomorrow. Wait, that means today is Lucia. (bitterly) A martyr with hair in flames and blood dripping down her dress, that seems about right… (sniffle) We were going to go to the Lucia morning at the Swedish Church. I was going to show him some more ‘wacky Swedish traditions’. Don’t know why I thought that would be a good idea… ‘Cause Midsummer was such a roaring success. (unhappy laugh, then sob) Don’t know what I’ll do for Christmas now. Maybe lie here, stare at the ceiling and cry. It’s what I do now, I suppose. Oh, fuck. Why does it have to hurt so fucking much? It’s like you were saying when Rachel was in the hospital – loving so much really opens up for getting hurt, right? And here we go. Boom. Torn to shreds. Just like that. (sighs) I’ll stop. I have nothing new to say. Already boring myself with all this misery. Distract me. Please. Anything. (sad smile) I love you.
(clicks)
Scene 50.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
My dearest Kat. You are not boring to me. Never could be. You are just very, very sad, and hurting. And how could you not be. I can’t promise you when, but I can tell you that the pain will ease. You will feel better. I know it’s not much comfort right now, but you will be happy again. I know you will. (beat) All right. Distraction time. (beat) I had a final session with my supervisor about my dissertation yesterday. It went well, I think. They said some good things about it, so, fingers crossed I pass! I’ll find out my grade next week. And – I haven’t told you about going to see Maia’s sculpture, have I? It was a whole ceremony – they called it an unveiling but of course it was way too big and too high up to cover, so they turned on this big spotlight – it was at night – and of course it sparkled and shone – it was incredible! Bri (Bree) took tons of photos, I’ll get some double printed and send you. And there’s a plaque in Town Hall with Maia’s name on it and everything. It was like a cocktail party, with all these Town Hall officials, and Maia and Tia and Bri (Bree) and I not quite fitting that mold, but bringing some variety, I guess. It was fun! Also, I’m going to have to get some sort of day job in January, my scholarship will be up, and it’s not like I can expect the creative writing to start paying right away. If ever, but you know. I have to believe it will happen at some point. I’ve been worried about it, but Rachel may have found a solution. They’re going to be short staffed at the library while Rachel is on parental leave, so maybe I can be an assistant there for a while. Would be great if it worked out. I’ve sent out all sorts of feelers for different writing jobs, and hopefully some of them will come to something, but would be really good to have some form of reliable income. And I love libraries! Always have. Especially this one – it’s where I met Rachel! All right, my dear, I should go sleep, it’s late. I will keep sending you daily distraction e-mails for as long as you like. Let me know if there’s anything else I can do. I love you so much. Oceans of hugs.
(clicks)
Scene 50.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
SHIRIN
Jess! Shirin here. Everything good? Seems Kat is settled into my room. So glad she is rid of that horrible boyfriend. I’m coming home next week, but I’m sure we will work it out. There’s always the sofa. Everything is going brilliantly here – I am learning so much and everyone I work with is so energetic and creative. It is amazing. (beat) I found out something awful today. Awful but oddly satisfying. Remember my old manager? How I never felt like I was given any challenges, and others seemed to? I could never quite put my finger on it, but I always felt like I was being held back. Well, today I got an e-mail from my old colleague Jamilah. Think you met her – she came to the flat a few times, oh yeah, you met her at New Years. Anyway. She’d been feeling the same way as me, we talked about it sometimes, she just wasn’t lucky enough to get out like I did. Well, she had stayed late to finish something one night last week, with another colleague, and they overheard our manager on the phone – he must have thought he was alone – and he was saying all this racist bullshit – I am not going to repeat all the hateful words. The gist of it was he was very proud to have kept us all down, while promoting and encouraging all the white men. ‘Cause, yeah, he’s sexist too. Disgusting man. But the beautiful thing is that Jamilah had one of those old tape recorders, so she managed to record most of it, and now he is facing a disciplinary hearing at work, and they are looking at a possible lawsuit! So pleased that that creep finally gets what he deserves. (beat, surprised) I’m happy, Jess. Not only about this, but in general. I finally feel like I am getting to do what I want to do, and I am learning, and being challenged, every day. I miss my family, of course, and my friends, but I am meeting so many great people and I have this very deep feeling that *this* is where I should be. It’s hard to explain. But I have a feeling you probably get it. (smiles) Hope everything’s good! Big hugs!
(clicks)
Scene 50.5
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Hello Jess. Still not doing much. I… can’t. Got a call from an unknown number today, wouldn’t have answered but it kept ringing and… Remember I asked for a therapist on the NHS a while back? That was her. Pretty good timing for once… I cried at her a little, couldn’t help myself. But she seemed to take it well, so she might actually work out. I’ll see her beginning of January – there was no way to fit it in earlier with all the holidays. I am flying home to Sweden on Tuesday – my mother’s planned it all. I am really looking forward to seeing her. But it scares me, too. She has this way of making me really think about things and everything is just so painful that I don’t want to think about any of it… Suppose I’ll have to at some point-
(footsteps during previous, knock on door)
EMMA
(muffled) Kat? It’s just me and Claire. We have ice cream!
KAT
(sad smile) Come in.
(door opens, EMMA and CLAIRE come in)
CLAIRE
(hands KAT ice cream bowl and spoon, EMMA sits on bed, CLAIRE on chair, ice cream eating during following) Here, thought you needed some Festivus.
KAT
(doubtful) Festivus? (tastes) Mmmm.
EMMA
(smiles) From that Seinfeld episode, I suppose.
CLAIRE
It’s really nice.
EMMA
Yeah. Not that into ginger, but the cinnamon is good.
KAT
(almost crying) Thanks. I- (small sob)
EMMA
Hey. Come here. (KAT moves to bed, they hug) Don’t want you crying in your ice cream, now do we?
KAT
(shaky smile) Thanks, Emma. That would be a shame. (eats) Oh yeah, say hi to Jess.
EMMA
Hi Jess! Hope everything’s good!
CLAIRE
(uncomfortable) Hey Jess.
KAT
Distract me. Please. What’s going on with you two.
EMMA
Claire’s got some news.
CLAIRE
Yeah. (pretty excited) I’ve joined this improv comedy group – they’re really good.
EMMA
They were at Edinburgh Fringe last year – and they’re fantastic!
KAT
(happy through sadness) That’s great, Claire.
CLAIRE
Thanks. Love improv. Not leaving my day job quite yet, though. Still years of snotty noses and potty training, I think.
EMMA
You never know – you really are good. Maybe the improv will take off?
CLAIRE
Maybe…
EMMA
So Kat, did you decide when you are going to Sweden?
KAT
Tuesday. Shirin’ll be here Monday, so I’ll be on the couch for one night. Not sure where to go when I come back though – I really have to get back to work on the 27th.
EMMA
You’re coming back here, of course. Shirin wouldn’t have it any other way.
CLAIRE
Lee’s room will be empty.
EMMA
Really?
CLAIRE
He’s going away over the holidays, he’ll be back in January.
EMMA
Well there you go. Ask Lee if you can stay in his room.
KAT
(cries a little) You are all being so kind.
CLAIRE
We can stop if you like. (smiles) Start saying nasty things to you.
KAT
(shaky laugh) Thanks Claire. Knew I could count on you.
CLAIRE
Anytime.
EMMA
So… Have you heard from him?
KAT
No. (starts crying)
CLAIRE
Hey. Your eyes are red.
KAT
(shaky laugh) They are. (smiles) I’m a monster, really. (growls)
(EMMA and CLAIRE laugh a little)
EMMA
Let us know if you need help getting your things, all right? We could go over there and Claire could scowl at him while I fetch your stuff.
CLAIRE
Been practicing my scowl.
KAT
Thanks. It can wait. I have all the clothes I need, so… Later?
EMMA
All right. Let us know. (takes KAT’s empty ice cream bowl and spoon, gets up) We’ll leave you to your voicemail.
CLAIRE
(gets up) Yeah. There’s more ice cream in the freezer.
KAT
(emotional) Thank you.
EMMA
Bye Jess!
CLAIRE
Yeah, bye.
KAT
Bye. And thanks. (footsteps, door closes, to JESS) Hey, Jess. They’ve been so great. Even Claire. I think now she is dealing with whatever was going on with her, she has more… energy to be kind, you know? (sighs) Feel better after some ice cream. Still. (pause) You know. Think I’ll go see what’s on TV. So happy everything’s going well with your dissertation. You deserve every good thing. I love you.
(clicks)
Scene 50.6
OLIVIA
(exhausted) Hello. We are back in our hostel after a very long day. Say hello, Tammi.
TAMMI
(yawns) Yeah, hi.
OLIVIA
Mike and Scott ended up giving us dinner as well as lunch. We’ve… What have we been today doing, Tammi?
TAMMI
All of us took the dogs for a really long walk.
OLIVIA
Yes! That was great! Got to see some of the surrounding woodland.
TAMMI
Bush.
OLIVIA
Yes. Bush. Bushland?
TAMMI
And you and Mike talked some more, while Scott made dinner. He wouldn’t let me help, just told me to, like, entertain him while he worked. (beat) I like him.
OLIVIA
Yeah. I like them both.
TAMMI
Yeah. So… How do you feel after today?
OLIVIA
I… I don’t know. Very tired.
TAMMI
Fair enough.
OLIVIA
It… wasn’t like I thought it would be. He wasn’t… like I thought he would be… and I need to think about this when I have slept for a very long time (yawns).
TAMMI
All right. We should go and sleep soon. Early start tomorrow.
OLIVIA
Ugh. Yes. We’re flying to Frankfurt in (checks) seven hours, and then we have separate flights from there.
TAMMI
Plenty of time to talk on the plane, though.
OLIVIA
Yes. Or sleep.
TAMMI
(laughs) You can sleep. I’m watching all the movies – I hope there are some good ones!
OLIVIA
(smiles) OK. So this is it from Melbourne – next week will be from my parents’ house, I suppose.
TAMMI
Without me!
OLIVIA
Yes. Though I can call you in if you like?
TAMMI
We might do that. Right. Done for today?
OLIVIA
Yes. Completely done. Bye! (yawns)
TAMMI
Bye!
OLIVIA
Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find out more about the show, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. We are also on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days. I am so very happy and so grateful to our wonderful amazing patrons! We also have merch – check it out at Y2Kpod.com[slash]merch. Our amazing intro and outro music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 51: DECEMBER 18-24, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 51.1
OLIVIA
Hello listeners! This is Olivia, in my parents’ house, in what still is my bedroom. Not for much longer though. They’ve sold it, now. Leaving in January. (trying to be cheerful) Have I told you where I am? Feel like I haven’t. I’m in Ireland. In a little place outside Dublin. We moved here five years ago. And I am feeling much more awake than I did last week. That stop in Melbourne felt… surreal, somehow, sandwiched in between flights… When I finally got here I think I slept for 20 hours or something. (smile) And then I woke up and realized it was winter. Very confusing. Also I’ve had quite a few talks with my parents. (sighs) After meeting Mike… I think somehow I thought finding Mike would make it easier to face my parents’ divorce. And it didn’t. At all. Still glad I found him, but… (emotional) This is still very hard. (beat) I’ve asked them to come on next week. My parents. Everyone else has been making appearances, so seems only fair they should too. Mum was a little doubtful, but mama talked her into it. Speaking of next week… it will be the last episode of the podcast. It’s been… extraordinary, really. This year… So much has happened. And most of it because I was feeling angry and hurt and sorry for myself and decided to throw these old voicemails onto the internet… Never really thought anyone would listen. But here I am. And here you are, dear listeners. I am so grateful for that. (deep breath) Right. We did listen to last week’s voicemails at the hostel, but I was so tired I hardly understood what they were saying. (smiles) I’ve relistened. So. Last week, Jess got good feedback on her dissertation, Shirin discovered her old boss was a racist and Kat was a little cheered up by an ice cream flavor called Festivus. Welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 51.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
(background cooking noises)
JESS
(happy but stressed) Kat! Happy holidays! I have some incredible news! I just got an e-mail from a film producer in London, and they want me to come talk to them about my screenplay! The only problem is they want me to meet them in London January 3rd, and, well, plane tickets are very expensive and my girlfriend is very pregnant. So not sure how I am going to handle all that. (deep breath) But excited all the same. And even if I can’t go, the fact they’re interested is a good sign, right? Means someone else might be interested too…
BRI
(distant, cooking noises stop) Of course you have to go, sib. I’ve already said I’ll move in with Rachel while you’re gone.
JESS
(to BRI) You’re the best, sib. I just don’t know how to make it all happen.
BRI
(comes over, sits down) All right. What date’s the meeting?
JESS
January 3rd.
BRI
You can fly out on the 31st. Tickets will be cheap New Year’s Eve.
JESS
Yeah, that might work.
BRI
And you could stay with your old flatmates.
JESS
Probably – I think Kat was going to stay in Lee’s room, so the couch should be available. But, Bri (Bree), what about Rachel? What if the baby comes early? I know you’d take wonderful care of them, but… What if something scary happens?
BRI
You can never know that.
JESS
Exactly! (deep breath)
BRI
(gently) Are you going to live your life like that? Avoiding things because something might happen to Rachel or the baby?
JESS
Yes? No. (sighs) I don’t know. (smiles) You are seeing all this way too clearly, you know.
BRI
(smiles) I know. I’m a pain.
JESS
You are! (smiles) Still the best sib I could ever have wished for.
BRI
(smiles) Ditto.
RACHEL
(muffled, from bedroom) Jess?
JESS
(gets up, footsteps, door opens) Coming! (kisses RACHEL, distant) You all right?
(BRI goes back to cooking)
RACHEL
(distant) Yes. (sniffs) Oh that smells delicious! Right. I think I left my crochet project in the living room.
JESS
(distant) I’ll get it. Before I do (sits down on side of bed) I think Bri (Bree) just talked me into going to London for that meeting about my screenplay. Are you sure you’re all right with that?
RACHEL
(distant) Course. We will be fine. Can’t have you missing an opportunity like that. And yes you *are* taking that Christmas money from my parents for the ticket.
JESS
(distant) But-
RACHEL
(distant) They said it was ours to spend as we wanted. And there will be enough left over to do other things. Now go look at flights. (beat) Go!
JESS
(distant)(smiles) You’re so bossy! You and Bri (Bree) both.
BRI
(distant, yells, smiling) I heard that!
JESS
(distant)(yells to BRI, smiling) Good! (to RACHEL) All right. I’ll get your crochet first, though.
RACHEL
(distant) Thanks, love.
(Footsteps back and forth)
BRI
(distant) Hey, sib, did you forget Kat again?
JESS
I did! Thanks! (to KAT) Hi Kat! So there you have it. I’m coming to London, apparently. I’ll send Shirin an e-mail – have to get back to her anyway, she left a voicemail a few days ago. But as it’s more or less Grand Central Station over here these days maybe I should stick to voicemailing you – at least you’re used to it! Bri (Bree) is preparing holiday food – as Rachel can’t go anywhere we’ve invited everyone who didn’t have other plans for Christmas lunch on Monday, should be crowded but fun. (laughs) Yesterday I passed some students in a park having a Christmassy picnic in shorts, t-shirts and santa hats. I love that. It is so quintessentially Auckland, somehow. Next year we’ll have to do a great big Christmas picnic – (turns to BRI) right Bri (Bree)?
BRI
(distant) What was that?
JESS
Christmas picnic next year?
BRI
(distant) Absolutely! Much better than that chilly Canada Day outing.
JESS
Yes! (to KAT) That was us not *quite* understanding what season we were in… Still fun though. And at least it didn’t rain. Right. I have to start finding flights. I hope you have a good time in Sweden, say hi to your mom for me. I hope you find a little rest from all the hard stuff. Also – I will see you soon – that is ‘a-mazing’! I love you. Oceans of hugs!
(clicks)
Scene 51.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
(happy but still tired and sad) Hey Jess. I’m in my mother’s study. I am so very happy you are coming to London. And that a producer is interested – I mean I am not surprised because your screenplay is amazing, but still – that is wonderful. I… have some news too. Still can’t quite believe it. I did a screen test for a film months ago – don’t think I even mentioned it, it seemed like such a long shot. I hadn’t heard anything, but then yesterday I got a call from Sarah – you know the director of that IKEA ad? Seems she is an AD for this film, and one of the supporting actors dropped out last minute, and when they were going through potential replacements she recognized me, and put in a good word, and I am going in for a meeting with them when I’m back in London. And if that goes well… If I understood this right – and I was pretty much in shock – I’d have to be in Kazakhstan mid-January for six weeks of filming. So that jolted me out of this grieving a little. Yeah. Could fall through, of course, but still. Very exciting, right? O-K. (sighs) Also. Johnno’s started texting a few days ago. After… 10 days of silence… He’s at his mother’s house for the holidays and… He wants to see me when we’re both back in London… I don’t know. It is too painful. I can’t… (unhappy snort) I’d rather meet fifty casting directors than him right now. But I suppose we have to meet sometime. (pause) I haven’t responded yet. I don’t know what to say. I’m pretending I can’t receive the texts when I’m in Sweden, but I can…
(knock on door)
KIRSTEN
Katarina?
KAT
Kom in!
KIRSTEN
Allt OK?
KAT
I’m voicemailing Jess – you can say hello if you like?
KIRSTEN
(pulls up a chair, sits) Hello Jessica! I hope you are well. Katarina tells me-
KAT
Hang on, I’ll be right back. (footsteps)
KIRSTEN
Just you and me then, Jessica. (lowers voice slightly, closer to mic) Well I am sure you are as relieved as I am that Katarina is not with that man anymore. Felt like I was walking on eggshells, trying to keep her talking to me and not criticizing. She is hurting so much, though. I am glad that you are going to see each other in London, I think it will be good for her. And congratulations! I have every finger and toe crossed for your meeting with that producer. You have both had quite the year, haven’t you? And you have so much ahead of you – being a parent is a wonderful thing, you know. And there are so many other exciting things coming up – if not this producer, then another, I am sure. I know-
(footsteps)
KAT
(sits down) Hello again.
KIRSTEN
Hej min lille skatt. (beat) I’ll leave you to it. I’ll call you in (beat) five minutes for Donald Duck.
KAT
(smiles) Thanks.
KIRSTEN
All right. Happy Christmas, Jessica! (footsteps, door closing)
KAT
Bye. (to JESS) Bet she was pleased to get to talk to you on her own for a bit… I actually didn’t plan that… I… I just got my period. Huh. I can’t even… Emotions very mixed on this one. I’m disappointed. (small sob) Of course I’m disappointed. But also, I’ve been sort of hoping for this. I wanted… I thought that we would parent together, you know? And now… It’s probably better this way. I’m just… So fucking sad. ‘Cause now I have… nothing. Nothing and no-one. Ugh. Better go watch TV so *something* happens. I love you. And I will see you in… seven days –
KIRSTEN
(muffled, yelling) Katarina! Det beginner nu!
KAT
Jag kommer! (to JESS) I have explained the Swedish obsession with Disney cartoons at three pm on Christmas Eve, right? If not this will make absolutely no sense… (small laugh) Oceans of hugs.
(clicks)
Scene 51.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JOHNNO
Kat. It’s Johnno. I’m in Devon. Sadly not in Barcelona with you. (sighs) You are not responding to my texts. So here I am. On your voicemail thing. (deep breath, slightly wooden, is reading from a script he’s written) I have been thinking a lot about us. And I don’t want to give up. I know I gave you too much of an ultimatum. (beat) Some of what happened is probably that you are once again suffering for the fact that I have been hurt in relationships before. I cannot deal with situations where there is a risk I will be hurt or abandoned. A defense mechanism starts up and I get cold and distant. And then it takes some time before I stop lashing out in panic and start thinking rationally again. All you have to do is leave me alone for a bit and I will calm down.
Maybe it will be too hard to start over without getting stuck in all the old patterns. But I would very much like to try. And let it take time. I would like to see if we can build a new relationship. Where we look forward to spending time together. Where you do not feel like I am suffocating you. And where I feel secure knowing that you want me.
I am ready to try to change my ways. I cannot promise I will succeed right away. There will be situations where I will feel rejected or excluded and feel bad about it. But I will try to recognize my patterns and try to stop them, and to not let the little things get to me. And not take it out on you. And trust that you do care about me.
(paper rustling slightly) If my dream comes true and this is not the end I hope you will help me by not listening too much to all the silly things I say when I am upset. Instead of feeling hurt and trying to adjust your behavior to avoid me doing it again. What I really need is for you to contradict me until I understand that I am wrong. Which may take time.
I have to consider that you might not want me back. That you cannot see how I would fit into your life. *Why* you would want to be with me. But I want to believe in fairy tales and the Hollywood films that make me cry on Sunday mornings, that love is the most important thing and that it conquers all. Because I do love you. Of course I do. Should have said it long ago.
Can we see each other after Christmas? Text me.
I love you.
(clicks)
Scene 51.5
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
OLIVIA
Oh wow. *That* is this weeks’ last voicemail? O—K. Suppose we will find out what Kat made of this next week. (beat) All that remains for me today is to wish all of our listeners happy holidays! I will be back next week for the very last episode. I wi-
RACHEL
(muffled, yelling) Liv! Dinner’s ready!
OLIVIA
(yells) Coming, mama! (to mic) Talk to you next week.
OLIVIA
Please e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com, find me on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com, where you can find out more about the show, and, of course, listen to all the episodes. We are also on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your podcasts. If you like Y2K, please tell your friends to listen too! And if you want to support the show further – thank you so much – you can do that by going to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod and pledging a monthly amount – from 1 US dollar you get all our episodes early! So if you were a patron, you could check out next week’s episode in just a few days. I am so very happy and so grateful to our wonderful amazing patrons! We also have merch – check it out at Y2Kpod.com[slash]merch. Our amazing intro and outro music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you for listening, and welcome back next week when we return to the year 2000.
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPISODE 52: DECEMBER 25-31, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 52.1
OLIVIA
Hello dear listeners, welcome to the final episode of the Y2K podcast. I am still in Ireland, and after today’s voicemails, I am going to share with you a conversation I had last night with my parents, and also (beat) a surprise guest. So this will be a long episode, because there are lots of voicemails too. Suppose we’d better get going! Last week Jess got a meeting in London about her screenplay, Kat spent Christmas in Sweden, and found out she was up for a film role, and Johnno left a long message saying he wanted to try again with Kat. (deep breath) For the very last time – welcome to the year 2000!
Scene 52.2
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
(nervous) Hi Jess, I’m back in London. In Lee’s room this time. (small laugh) Which used to be my room, of course. Just like old times. Not really, though. Feeling… a little more myself after a few days with my mother. She can be a little much sometimes, but she’s been great – really listening. And not digging too deep… Um. (beat) Johnno sent a voicemail yesterday. (disbelieving) On here. He’s- he wants to see me. And he…. He wants to try again. He says he is ready to change. (pause) He says he loves me. (pause) I haven’t dared tell anyone but you. (longing) But of course I want to see him. And of course I… I love him too. So if there’s a chance… I think we deserve that chance. I am meeting him tonight. In a pub. Neutral territory, you know. Oh Jess I am so scared. But what if I can have it all back? What if he can change? I want that so much. I know you have your reservations about him but… Things have been hard but also – we’ve been so happy. I just want that again. I love you.
(clicks)
Scene 52.3
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Oh Kat. I get it. And I am sending so many hugs your way. Just be careful, all right? If you do decide to get back together, take it slow, you know? (breathes) I’m not- I can’t hide the fact that this makes me very anxious. But you have to do what makes you happy. Please make sure he makes you happy, all right? (breathes) Hey, at least I will see you soon, right? And we can talk properly about all this. And- (beat) So, I’m flying in on the morning of the 31st, UK time, probably be completely jetlagged and confused, but Shirin said you are having some sort of New Year’s dinner thing, so I’ll definitely stay awake for that. Maybe I can have a nap in your roo- Lee’s room – if I need to? Can’t very well nap on the couch mid-day… Feels surreal that I’ll be back in Wood Green for New Years again. Remember last year? Yeah. So much… Everything. (beat) Rachel is doing well, no change, really, so that is good. And Bri (Bree) is moving in… but you know all this. Let me know how everything goes, all right? And – you didn’t mention the movie – when are you meeting the movie people? I want to know everything. I love you so much. Oceans and oceans!
(clicks)
Scene 52.4
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
Jess! We’re back together! I am so happy! (happy laugh) We said “I love you:s” before even sitting down… It’s like all that time I spent crying in Shirin’s room was only a bad dream… But yes, yes, we are taking it slow. I am not moving back in yet. I can stay here for a bit – Shirin’s going back to New York after New Years and she is OK with me staying in her room. Also I gave back the ring, he’s going to hold onto it until it feels right to ask me again. We’ll be going on dates, which feels exciting. Like tonight we are finally seeing that Romeo and Juliet production we were supposed to when, well, you know. (beat) Reclaiming that, which is good, I think. (serious) I think he does want to change, Jess. He is trying. And I need to change, too. But the main thing is we are doing it together. So, ‘no worries’, OK? (laughs) All this means that now I have energy left over to be nervous about this film meeting. It’s tomorrow. And they haven’t sent me any lines or anything, so I can’t prepare. The film is a period piece on the Mongolian empire, and it’s being filmed in Kazakhstan, which I will admit is a country I had to look up on a map. I found some pictures – seems like it’s incredibly beautiful, I can completely see why they would set a film there. The character I’m up for is supporting – the younger sister of the protagonist’s wife – but she’s a bit of a tomboy so she puts on men’s clothes and learns to ride, which means that if I get it, I’d have to spend a few weeks before I start filming just training stunt horseback riding. This is where I am very grateful I stuck with it all those riding lessons growing up – I wouldn’t have a chance at this role if I didn’t already know how to ride a horse. So we shall see. Keep sending those hugs my way – seems they are working! I’ll let you know how it goes. Oceans of hugs!
(clicks)
Scene 52.5
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Hey Kat. Congratulations. (breathes) If you’re happy, I’m happy. Just keep being happy, all right? And break a leg today! You will be extraordinary, I know it! I have to go – I love you so much – and see you soon!
(clicks)
Scene 52.6
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
(very excited but incredulous) Jess! I got it! I’m going to Kazakhstan on January 14th! I can’t believe it! I got a real film role on location which pays real actual money! I am simply beyond excited! I have to run to work – I’ll tell you all about it when I see you. Oceans and oceans!
(clicks)
Scene 52.7
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
CLAIRE
Hey Jess. Claire. (beat) Kat says you are coming here. Suppose I’ll see you. And it’s easier to say this on voicemail than in person, so here we go. (deep breath) Crap. I’m no good at this. (exaggerated accent) Get it together, Claire! (beat, then quickly) I’m sorry Jess. I wasn’t good to you. (lets out breath, relieved) Sorry it’s taken me so long to say it. (beat) Hey! I said two ‘sorry’:s in a row! (fake US accent) Better quit while I’m ahead. (small laugh) I hope you are good. See you soon. Bye. (deep sigh of relief, cut off midway)
(clicks)
Scene 52.8
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Kirsten! Hi. It’s Jess. I suppose you’ve heard they’re back together. I’m not surprised, only resigned. Didn’t really think he’d let go that easily. But AAAARGH! It’s so frustrating. (sigh) Just wanted to share that with someone who understands. Hope you have a happy new year – and feel free to vent to me about this whenever you want. Oceans of hugs!
Scene 52.9
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
(very sad) Oh Jess. I should have known it was too good to be true. And today of all days – fitting it should be today, somehow. (slowly) Today was my due date. I was supposed to have a baby today. But no baby for me. And no… relationship. Fuck. (beat) *I* broke it off this time. The final time. He… I know he wants to change. But he just kept pushing. And he wanted to be happy about me going to Kazakhstan, I believe he really did. But in the end he tried to persuade me not to go. And to move back in, right now. And make wedding plans. And I wasn’t ready to do either of those things. I wanted there to be a way but I couldn’t see it. So I just came back from breaking up with him. I’d prepared, I even wrote him a letter. I thought if he couldn’t listen in the moment, maybe he could read it later and understand. But he wouldn’t take it. (small sob) He wouldn’t listen. (sad sigh) He was so hurt. And I can’t… I can’t do this anymore. I have to… heal. I love you.
(clicks)
Scene 52.10
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JOHNNO
(slightly wooden, is again reading from a script he’s written) Kat. I am leaving this voicemail because I cannot give up while I still believe you love me. And I do believe it. That was one thing you managed to convince me of yesterday, even though that wasn’t your intention. There has to be a way… I understand I gave you too much of an ultimatum. Again. But when you said you weren’t sure we should be together that made me so scared I stopped listening. I get so stuck in my patterns and expectations, and they are so hard to break even when I recognize them. But I also need a certain type of pattern, I need to know what to expect, and I need to be able to predict what will happen.
(paper rustling slightly) When I start thinking I realize how foolish my actions are. Throwing your letter on the ground yesterday was stupid. You were right that I would have needed to read what you had to say. Right then I just felt like it would hurt too much to even hold it. But as soon as I calm down and the adrenaline stops pumping I start understanding what you mean and realize you are right about a lot of things…I can’t blame you if you do the same to this message – erase it without listening. But you are not usually as foolish as I am when it comes to that kind of thing.
I don’t want to lose you. You are the best girlfriend I have ever had. I want everything with you. But I should have learnt to slow down. Probably much too late to realize that now.
And it hurts to think that I may have to give this up. Perhaps I have learnt something for possible future relationships. Perhaps I can identify patterns better next time. But I am not ready to give up hope. Not until you tell me that you don’t love me anymore. That’s when I know to stop fighting…
I love you.
(clicks)
Scene 52.11
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
JESS
Kat. I am so sorry. But I am also… I am also really proud of you for listening to yourself. All this, all this will make you stronger. And you will heal. But it will probably take time. (beat) If you feel there are things you want to say to Johnno uninterrupted – like in the letter – maybe do what he did and leave him a voicemail? (smiles) Maybe it’s good that you are going far away and doing something completely different in just a few weeks. Maybe that will make it easier, to have something new to focus on. I am so happy you have that, and I know you will be incredible. I’m off to the airport soon, which means I will see you in *hours* rather than days at this point. So we will talk. We will go for epic walks in Wood Green and we will talk and talk and talk some more. I love you. Oceans of hugs!
(clicks)
Scene 52.12
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
KAT
This is the letter you threw away. (pause) Johnno. (beat) I care about you so much. The feelings are there and will continue to be there. But something you said a few days ago has stuck with me. “It’s not about how much we love each other, it’s about if we can live together”. I would love for love to be enough for this to work, but we both know that it is not. When we broke up the first time something broke in me. I was giving it my all, I believed so much in our relationship up until then. Even when it was hard. Even when we were angry with each other. But it hurt so much that you chose to let the relationship end rather than consider changing your behavior. That… broke my trust in you, in the relationship and my energy and will to work on it just… died. I didn’t understand it then, but it damaged so much. And then I spent Christmas grieving. I was and I am so sad to lose you and what we have built. I came far in my mourning process. Much farther than I realized. But then when you wanted to try again I was so happy. I could let all my feelings out again and it was such a joy. You were mine again and I got to be yours. The emotions took over. (beat) But the problems remain. And my energy to deal with them is nearly gone. I wanted to ease back into the relationship and try to simply spend time with you. I was hoping I could find a way back and that I would see your willingness to change. But there was no time. Yesterday I had been thinking about this all day and I understand that you noticed I wasn’t fully present. But I felt attacked by your interrogation. I tried to avoid the conversation but you kept asking. And I finally told you the truth. I didn’t know. You were so unhappy and it killed me to see it. And then the ultimatum – that I had to be sure I wanted to be with you to spend time with you. In the same way you earlier told me I had to choose between you and Jess. You close all these doors for me and I understand you do it to protect yourself. But yesterday you closed the door to the one chance I had to move forward in the relationship. I can’t live with that all-or-nothing-mentality. For me there has to be compromises and an idea of meeting half-way. Otherwise we will only continue what we’ve been doing – where I try to compromise and you try to get your way or just give up. We cannot live together like that, Johnno. It’s destructive. I don’t want us to hurt each other any more. That’s why I broke up with you. And that’s why we will not get back together. It has nothing to do with how I feel about you and everything to do with the fact that we cannot live together.
(clicks)
Scene 52.13
(Modem dial-up tone) (click)
(On hospital speakerphone)
BRI
Hey sib, it’s Bri (Bree). I’m here with Rachel and Maia. (beat) Rachel has something to tell you.
RACHEL
Jess, my love. She’s here. Our baby is here. She is asleep in my arms, and we are both well. Everything’s good. It all happened very quickly – I’d just fallen asleep, and then I woke up and contractions had started. Bri (Bree) called the hospital right away, and they sent an ambulance.
BRI
(gently) Followed the procedure.
RACHEL
Yes. Seemed like a lot of fuss to me, but they do that when you’re on bedrest, apparently. And they put all this extra monitoring stuff on me, and the baby, but they needn’t have bothered. She was in a right hurry. Weren’t you, little one? (beat) Still hurt like… nothing I’ve ever experienced, but… Worth it. (smiles) I would have loved for you to have been here. I’m sorry about the timing, my love. But you are where you needed to be, and Bri (Bree) and Maia are taking really good care of us ‘til you get back.
MAIA
We won’t stop once Jess gets back, you know.
RACHEL
(laughs) Of course. So don’t worry, love. We are well, and happy, and taken care of. Oh, and I can walk again. Not quite like usual, but I’ll get there. Let me know when you’ve landed safely in London. (to the others) Anything you want to add?
BRI
Take care, sib. All is good here.
MAIA
Don’t worry, Jess. See you soon.
RACHEL
I love you so much. Do what you need to do, and then come home to your family.
BRI
(same time as MAIA) Love you, sib!
MAIA
(same time as BRI) Love you Jess!
EVERYONE
Bye!
(clicks)
Scene 52.14
OLIVIA
Oh wow. I’m crying. That was… A lot. (beat) And I have more. I sat with my parents yesterday, and asked them a few things I’ve been wanting to know. We also have a house guest, so you are going to get to hear her too. I’ll be back again after this, to finish everything properly.
Scene 52.15
(MUSIC)
OLIVIA
Hello. It is Christmas Eve, and I am here with my parents, say hello!
RACHEL
Hello!
JESS
Hi!
OLIVIA
And we have someone staying here over Christmas – hey Ina (EE-na)!
KAT
Hello. Though your listeners know me as Kat.
OLIVIA
Yes. Um, I wanted to give you all a chance to say something – I will play this after I’ve played the final voicemails, so this will be at the very end of the podcast. (pause) I have some questions, if that is easier?
RACHEL
I think so.
KAT and JESS
Yes.
OLIVIA
So… this isn’t for you, Ina. But-
KAT
Why don’t I go make some glögg and leave you to it?
OLIVIA
All right. (footsteps) So. Mum, mama. This has been a really strange year for me. I’ve… As you know, your divorce, it’s been really hard for me. (RACHEL and JESS make sympathetic ‘mm’:s) And… through these voicemails I‘ve spent all year listening to you when you first got together, and… (voice breaks a little) Why can’t it still be like that?
JESS
Oh, Liv. That’s the big one, right off. And I’m not sure we can answer that.
RACHEL
No. (sighs) Relationships are odd things, really. I still love your mum, Liv, you know that, right?
OLIVIA
Yes.
JESS
And I still love Rachel. Very much. But we have lived together and loved each other for a very long time, and now we both agree we are happier apart.
OLIVIA
But why?
RACHEL
Many reasons. One is that your mum is really happy here, in Ireland. I have had a good life here, but I would really like to go back to live in New Zealand. My parents are getting old, and most of the rest of my relatives are there, and I get to see them so rarely.
JESS
And I was ready to move with you back to New Zealand, but in that discussion… It became clear that being together isn’t really important for us anymore.
OLIVIA
But… You want to be with other people?
JESS
Someday, probably. Not right now, for me anyway.
RACHEL
Yes… someday, maybe.
OLIVIA
How can you both be so damned calm about this? All this year… I’ve felt like my world is being torn apart.
JESS
Oh Liv darling, I’m so sorry.
RACHEL
We both are, love. And… you know. Neither of us have ever been the shouty type. We both get angry sometimes, of course, and we’ve had lots of arguments over the years, but… We agree on this.
JESS
I know you are hurting, Liv. Is it… Has it gotten any easier over this past year?
OLIVIA
(smiling through tears) I thought I was asking the questions? (JESS and RACHEL laugh a little) It has. And listening to you two when you were closer to my age has… helped, somehow. Helped understand you better.
RACHEL
Good.
JESS
In that case, I’m glad you started this podcasting project.
OLIVIA
Really? I know you’ve had your doubts.
JESS
Yes. Really. And my doubts have been… Not so much about me but about all the other people whose voices are in there. When I found out, I was angry with you. You know that. But also, I understood, I think. And we’ve gotten hold of everyone at this point.
RACHEL
Yes. I made that my job, to make sure they didn’t hear about it from someone else. Some, like Bri (Bree) and Maia and Shirin and Emma were easy, we are still in touch with them. And Ina (EE-na) talked to her mother, of course. She also found Claire. I tracked down Johnno, eventually. Sent him an e-mail but never heard back. And… that’s everyone – everyone whose voice is in there.
OLIVIA
Right. So last week I listened to the bit where you mum – Jess – is about to fly to London for a meeting about your screenplay. And – knowing my birthday, I am guessing you weren’t there for my birth.
JESS
That’s right. I wasn’t there. Hated not being there.
RACHEL
But for what we knew at that time, it was the right decision.
JESS
It was. But it sucked.
RACHEL
I know. You only missed a few days.
JESS
Yeah.
OLIVIA
OK. (beat) But – the meeting? I’ve never heard of this film?
JESS
(laughs) It was never made. They were interested, but it came to nothing.
OLIVIA
Oh.
JESS
Very few people get their first screenplay made, you know. I did rework it years later, into a novel, but no-one wanted that either. Story’s too complicated, I think.
RACHEL
You should try it with your publisher now.
JESS
Maybe. Might do that.
(footsteps, KAT comes in with glögg)
KAT
Safe to enter now?
OLIVIA
(laughs) I think so.
KAT
(hands out glögg, clink of spoons, cups and bowls) One for you and… you… and you.
RACHEL
Thanks. (inhales the smell) I love this stuff.
JESS
So do I. (sips)
OLIVIA
Have I had this before? Smells very Swedish.
KAT
It is!
OLIVIA
(sips carefully) Hm. I like it.
KAT
And very Christmassy. You must have had the kiddie version at some point. (beat) So, anything else you want us to talk about, Liv?
OLIVIA
I can ask about the film you were talking about in the last voicemails, perhaps?
JESS
Khan!
KAT
Yes. That was my breakthrough, really. Led to so many other things. Was a pretty miserable shoot though. Very cold and very dusty and I spent so much time on horseback… But Kazakhstan was beautiful, and the crew was great.
OLIVIA
You… sounds like you weren’t exactly happy beforehand, so…
KAT
I was completely devastated. But doing something new, something that required *all* of my attention was really good at that point. (sips)
OLIVIA
Right. Don’t know what else to ask about… Anything you want to say?
RACHEL
We’ve talked quite a lot about this since you came home, but I want to say that I am really happy you’ve found Mike. And I am sorry we didn’t manage to find him sooner.
JESS
Yes – it’s been something I’ve worried over many times over the years, and I am so glad you have met him now.
OLIVIA
I’m glad too. Though… I think I expected… more, somehow.
RACHEL
In what way?
OLIVIA
I don’t know. Suppose I thought he’d be… like my parent somehow. But he’s really not.
JESS
Maybe he can be something else?
OLIVIA
Yeah. We’ll see. (beat) Anything else? (sips)
KAT
It’s been strange reliving all these happenings through your podcast. (Agreements from RACHEL and JESS) But I think it’s been good, too. Some things I had forgotten, others I think I had rewritten in my mind a little. Memory is a tricky thing, right?
JESS
Yes! Some things I had completely forgotten. (sips)
OLIVIA
So… Why did you save the files on your computer?
JESS
I’m not sure, actually. I think it was an idea of preserving it, somehow, like a kind of diary. It was a very important year for me – for all of us – 2000. (Agreements from KAT and RACHEL) Not sure I saved any of the later voicemails – we got pretty busy with you, your mama and I.
OLIVIA
Right… And – why are there hardly any baby pictures of me? That’s what I was searching for to begin with.
RACHEL
(laughs) Really? We could have told you that. When we moved to the UK in… 2005, was it?
JESS
Yes.
RACHEL
We left a lot of stuff in storage in Auckland, Bri (Bree) was going to help us ship it later. But there was a fire in the storage facility, so we lost everything.
OLIVIA
So… (smiles) No big mystery?
RACHEL
(smiles) No. (sips)
OLIVIA
All right – think we’re done – want to say happy holidays to the listeners?
ALL
Happy holidays! (laughter)
(MUSIC)
Scene 52.16
OLIVIA
Hello again. Back for the last time. I asked Tammi to join me. Hang on. (clicks) Can you hear me Tammi?
TAMMI
(on phone all through scene) Yes! Hello!
OLIVIA
Hello! So, I asked you to join me to… wrap this up, I suppose.
TAMMI
Yes. It’s been fun.
OLIVIA
It has. But, you know… No more voicemails.
TAMMI
I know. So what are you going to do with all of your free time?
OLIVIA
(smiles) I don’t know. More hikes?
TAMMI
(laughs) There is always more hikes.
OLIVIA
Especially in New Zealand.
TAMMI
Yes! Looking forward to going back to summer.
OLIVIA
Oh yes! We’re going back after New Years.
TAMMI
We are. After your birthday – congratulations in advance! Hope it’s a good one!
OLIVIA
Thanks! Somehow I think it will be… We’re about to end here – but you and I will keep talking and release it as a Patreon special, right?
TAMMI
Yes! The final Tammi’s Takeover – part 4! The previous three takeover episodes are available to our Patreon supporters from a certain level, just go to patreon.com[slash]y2kpod to find out more.
OLIVIA
Exactly. But now I think it’s time to say goodbye to the listeners, right Tammi?
TAMMI
Yes. Goodbye – and thank you so much.
OLIVIA
Yes. Thank you, dear listeners, for coming along on this journey with me, with us. It’s been… So much has happened, and I’m not sure I’m even the same person I was a year ago. I mean, of course I am, but… It’s been a YEAR.
(CREDITS MUSIC)
OLIVIA
If you want to get in touch with me you can e-mail me at y2kpod@gmail.com. Or to find out what I’m up to, you can follow us on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod. Also check out our webpage, at y2kpod.com Our brilliant intro and outro music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. I’m Olivia, thank you so, so much for listening. (doesn’t quite know what to say, smiles) Oceans of hugs!
TAMMI
(laughs) Oceans of hugs! Bye!
OLIVIA
Bye!
(OUTRO MUSIC)
EPILOGUE: DECEMBER 31, 2000
(INTRO MUSIC)
Scene 53.1
(living room, low voices in background)
JESS
(on phone to RACHEL) Oh Rachel – she’s making little noises! Olivia is just the most adorable person ever. And you’re sure you’re all right, my love?… I so wish I was there! But just you wait, I’ll be home in four days and then *nothing* will come between me and my wonderful family… (laughs) Yes! I will cuddle Oliva and you for days! And change every single diaper (laughs) And cover Bri (Bree) in kisses… (laughs) Yeah, she’ll squirm a bit if I do that, maybe- … Great, yeah! I’ll have to buy her the most enormous gift for taking such good care of you both… And Maia! And Tia!… Yeah, all right, love you so much!… U-huh, yes I will tell Kat… Bye my loves! Happy new year! (click)
CLAIRE
Hey.
JESS
Hey Claire.
CLAIRE
So… congratulations?
JESS
(smiles) Thanks.
CLAIRE
I- (pause)
JESS
You…?
CLAIRE
(quickly) S’good to see you.
JESS
You too. Thanks for the voicemail. It meant a lot to me.
CLAIRE
Good. I’m- I’m glad.
JESS
You all right, Claire?
CLAIRE
Think so.
JESS
Good.
KAT
(footsteps, on phone with KIRSTEN, this plays in background during following) OK, mor. Gott nytt år… Ja, absolut…. Ja, jag ska…. Kram på dig… Ja… Visst. Kram… Gott nytt år! Hej då, hej…
CLAIRE
I’ll… go help with the food. (footsteps)
JESS
Right. (calls) Let me know if you need anything.
CLAIRE
(laughs a little) Won’t be *your* help we’ll be wanting… (footsteps)
JESS
(Laughs) Right. (calls after CLAIRE) I’ll send Kat.
KAT
(hangs up phone) You OK?
JESS
Yes. Just talked to Rachel. She sends hugs.
KAT
(smiles) Oceans of hugs?
JESS
(laughs) She didn’t say that, but yes.
KAT
(laughs) I’m so glad you’re here.
JESS
Me too. (smiles) Also feeling completely lost in time.
KAT
Yeah. You get any sleep this afternoon?
JESS
A bit. But there was some party prep noise going on.
KAT
I know, sorry.
JESS
It’s fine.
KAT
So, you’re a parent now.
JESS
I am. Doesn’t feel real at all.
KAT
(sad) I can imagine.
JESS
Oh fuck. I’m so sorry, Kat. Life isn’t fair.
KAT
(small sniff) It really isn’t. Last month I was engaged and trying for a baby, and now… Nothing… I have nothing… (smiles through tears) But I am so happy for you.
JESS
I know. (softly) I know.
KAT
He wants to talk. Again. (sighs) Suppose I owe him that.
JESS
You don’t owe him anything, you know. But if you want to talk, of course. Go talk.
KAT
Yeah. I… would prefer not to see him for a while. But I think it’s easier to just go with it.
JESS
You think… you think he wants to try to talk you into trying again?
KAT
Maybe. Probably. I don’t know. But (very sad) I can’t. I tried. It doesn’t work.
JESS
(relieved) All right. And, hey, you’re going to Kazakhstan!
KAT
(smiles) I am!
EMMA
(footsteps) Kat, could you- (beat) you two all right?
JESS
Yes. We were talking about Kat’s movie.
EMMA
So exciting. You’ll have to take lots of pictures, Kat – I don’t know anyone else who’s even been to Kazakhstan!
KAT
Me neither. But they have made a few films there, I think.
JESS
Wasn’t there a Bond film shot there?
EMMA
The World Is Not Enough. But it was only set in Kazakhstan, not filmed there. It-
SHIRIN
(footsteps, calls, a little annoyed) Emma? Where- oh. Come help.
JESS
All of us?
SHIRIN
Yes. You can chop things.
KAT
Can we just… I’m so happy the four of us are all back here again.
EMMA
Aww. Yes. We should make a toast or something.
JESS
I have a coffee mug somewhere…
SHIRIN
Hang on. (sounds of bottle being brought out, opened, glasses poured and handed out) Everyone ready?
KAT, JESS and EMMA
Yes!
SHIRIN
Cheers!
KAT, JESS and EMMA
Cheers!
JESS
Old acquaintance and all that…
EMMA
Only we won’t “be forgot” – right?
KAT
We won’t.
JESS
Definitely not.
SHIRIN
(smiles) Yeah. (beat) All right, kitchen everyone!
(footsteps, KAT starts humming “Should old acquaintance be forgot…”)
(MUSIC)
Scene 53.2
(after dinner, background voices)
KAT
Olivia is a beautiful name. And you can call her Liv, for short!
JESS
Liv. I like that.
KAT
Means ‘life’ in Swedish.
JESS
Wow. I love that. Thanks.
SHIRIN
(footsteps) There you are. You coming? It’s almost midnight.
KAT
We’ll be right there.
SHIRIN
All right. (footsteps)
JESS
Could next year perhaps be a little less… eventful? I feel like I’m still catching my breath.
KAT
I know. (sighs, smiles) But it’s been good too. I say – bring on 2001!
JESS
You are a-mazing! All right, welcome to the year 2001!
(glasses clink, fireworks, MUSIC)
Scene 53.3
KARIN
Hi! Karin Heimdahl here, creator of Y2K and also voice of Jess. Thank you so much for listening to our show this year. It means so much. It has been an overwhelming experience for me and for us and we are so humbled and grateful to all our listeners. This is it, folks, last episode of Y2K… Or is it? Season 2 is coming, but it will be very different from season 1. Stay tuned to this feed and our social media for more information on that!
Y2K has featured the voice talents of these wonderful folks:
KIRSTY
Kirsty Woolven as Olivia
JANIS
Janis Westin as Kat
KARIN
Karin Heimdahl as Jess
ADAM
Adam Blanford as Johnno
FELICITY
Felicity Boyd as Rachel
ANJALI
Anjali Kunapaneni as Shirin
SHEKENDRA
Shekendra Morgan as Maia
MADDY
Maddy Searle as Claire
ANNA
Anna Jartin as Tammi
LORCAN
Lorcan NicGiollaBhain as Bri
CHARLOTTE
Charlotte Norup as Kirsten
NERYS
Nerys Howell as Emma
KARIN
As well as these incredible guest voices
SARAH
Sarah Golding as drama school director
NATALIE
Natalie Beran as Cassandra
LEE
Lee Davis-Thalborne as Mike
ERIN
Erin Kyan as Scott
KARIN
And thank you so much to our Patreon supporters. We could not do this without you, and your generosity is humbling and astonishing. Thank you so very much.
Thanks also to our script consultants, Lina and Marion, and to Paola for production assistance. Very special thanks from me to the organizers of PodUK and PodTales, and to the audio drama community, for being so astonishingly supportive and inspiring.
If you want to support us you can tell your friends about the show, rate and review us on your podcatcher of choice or you can consider joining our Patreon supporters. There is a season 2 coming and our Patreon will be full of stuff. We offer you a free podcast and we are a completely indie production, with no network, sponsorship or ads. Listener support on Patreon means we can recoup some of our hosting costs and pay our fantastic actors, and also get set up for work on season 2! Please go to patreon.com/Y2Kpod to learn more. You can also find us on Twitter or Instagram @y2kpod, and that’s the number 2, and check out our website y2kpod.com for more information. Our wonderful intro and outro music is created and recorded by Jake Haws, check out his podcast “Making Music with Jake Haws” to hear more. Other music by ArchesAudio.com
Thank you. So much. And… talk again soon? Oceans of hugs!
(OUTRO MUSIC)
BEHIND THE SCENES 1: CAST INTERVIEW – Janis, Adam, Charlotte
Karin
Hi, Karin here, creator of Y2K. You are about to hear a wonderful cast interview. Before we start I just wanted to let you know that when we recorded it we recorded it in two parts. So the first part is the non-spoilery version, which you’ll be hearing today, and the second part is the spoilery section which you’ll be hearing at a later date when the spoilery bits have all aired. Enjoy the non-spoilery version today.
(INTRO MUSIC)
Karin
Okay, hello. Welcome to our very first cast interview. My name is Karin Heimdahl and I’m the creator of Y2K. And I am sitting here with – or online with three of our wonderful cast members. And I’m going to ask them to each introduce themselves and to tell you their name, of course, and the character they’re playing. And also just ’cause, you know, because we’re in different bits of the world, where you are right now and what time it is. And I’m going to start with Charlotte.
Charlotte
My name is Charlotte Norup, and I play Kirsten. And I’m in Denmark and it’s well 2 pm.
Karin
Cool. Okay, Adam.
Adam
I’m Adam Blanford. I play Johnno. And I’m in Colorado, USA. And it is 6:05 in the morning.
Karin
Oh, dear.
Oh, dear, oh dear and Janis.
Janis
Janis Westin I play Kat and I’m from Sweden. So same time zone as Charlotte. And so, a little after two in the afternoon.
Karin
Yes. And where are you?
Janis
In Sweden?
Karin
Yes.
Janis
I said that.
Karin
Yes, I was just gonna say because you and I are in different cities, though they are very, very close.
Yes.
They’re very, very close to each other. And I’m in Gothenburg, Sweden. So it’s about – how long does it take you to get to my house? Janis?
Janis
20 minutes with –
20/25 minutes. By car.
Karin
Yeah, we’re quite close. Cool. Okay. I wanted to start by – just because I know this is very different for all three of you – I wanted to talk to you a little bit about, or let you tell us a little bit about your, your voice acting background. And why don’t we start with Adam.
Adam
Alright. Notice I sound a little bit different. I’m fighting a cold.
I have been voice acting for about two years. And I started in August 2017. And I’ve been- I’ve done about 40/45 different podcasts and YouTube productions, things like that. And I’ve narrated three audio books. When I’m not fighting a cold I actually sound really good and people like my voice. Yeah, I played a whole range of characters from you know heroes to villains and I’ve got a pretty good facility for accents which is really helpful with Johnno.
Karin
Yeah which we’re very happy about!
Adam
So I’ve really had a fun time for the last few years doing this.
Karin
Cool! Yeah and Janis?
Janis
Yes. I have absolutely no experience of this is definitely the first thing that I do and it’s thanks to Karin. She- before she told me there’s such a thing as audio drama, I didn’t know that, so yeah, but I know her from before and thankfully she will let me be part of this.
Karin
Cool! Yeah, I actually ’cause you and I, Janis, we went to, we studied drama about 20 years ago.
Janis
Yep, yeah. Y2K.
Karin
Yeah, exactly around that time a little bit earlier actually, like ’99 or something like that. And when I was thinking, Okay, I need a Swedish voice actor who is not me because I don’t sound Swedish. And I need a Swedish voice actor who is or was very sort of happy with English and I know that, Janis, you speak English a lot in your daily life even though we live in Sweden. So I immediately thought of you and, and also because, you know, you’ve done a lot of acting, but you haven’t done voice acting, so I knew that you were a really good actress. And I was like, okay!
So I got you into this. Okay, Charlotte.
Charlotte
Yeah. I haven’t been nearly as active as Adam has but in February it’s been two years for me, too. I haven’t been in nearly as many things but it’s okay. Slowly progressing.
Karin
Yeah.
Charlotte
I’m mainly in horror productions, because that’s just my thing. Um, but I’m also the co-creator of Calling Darkness, so busy with that as well.
Karin
Which is a comedy horror, right?
Charlotte
Yeah, yeah.
Karin
Yeah.
Charlotte
So not pure horror.
Karin
No, exactly. I love it.
But I’m glad we could lure you into this even though it’s not horror.
Charlotte
Yeah, no, I had seen the casting call and was like, oh, that sounds really good. And then Graham Rowat sent me the casting call saying, I think this might be for you. And like, well, it’s in Swedish. I don’t speak Swedish! So I shut down about that until I talked to you about it. So it’s fine!
Karin
Yeah, and I actually because yes, the role of Kirsten was originally Kerstin, and she was Swedish because you play Kat’s mother, you play Janis’ mother. And actually, I mean, I had some Swedish auditions, and I just thought you were much better than they were. So I was like, Well, okay.
She now has a Danish mother!
Charlotte
Yeah.
Karin
Yeah. And I think I mean, my next first question was going to be what made you interested in Y2K? And I think Charlotte and Janis have, have already sort of answered that. I coerced both of you in various ways into doing this. Yeah, but Adam, what made you interested in this show?
Adam
I ran across the casting call talking to a friend of mine. My friend from New- New Zealand, was really interested in the podcast and she suggested that I try out for a part and I think I auditioned like the day before the casting call ended. I was like, Oh, no, why not?
Karin
Threw that in! Yeah,
Adam
Yeah. You know, it can’t hurt and so, so Johnno’s voice was kind of born there, I kind of threw together some different accents that I knew.
Karin
Hmm. Yeah. Cuz you were actually the, if we’re talking about casting, you were actually the only role that I did callbacks for. And I mean, for a few different reasons, because I had I had three of you. And Janis actually got to hear all three. I think actually four, but I only called back three in the end. And it was because of the character of Johnno. Oh, and this is the spoiler free section of our interview, but the character of Johnno is, has to do some fairly heavy stuff. And I wanted to, because I think when I sent you the callback, I also sort of described a little bit with this character is and wanted to make sure that you were ready and able and felt comfortable doing that. Playing, you know, playing the villain is kind of hard. It’s tough.
Adam
Yeah. I’ve done it in a few different productions and there’s definitely a responsibility. You have to make people dislike you, you know, you can’t be, you can’t be too likable. And I remember in our one of our first first meetings, you said, I gotta turn off the inner nice guy. So yeah, I do my best to do that, and, you know, be as heartless as humanly possible.
Karin
Yeah, and I think you’ve definitely done that. I’ve heard all of it and Charlotte and Janis have not, but I have. But yeah, it’s it is tough, because it’s easy. I mean, playing a villain is a really cool challenge, but it’s so difficult ’cause you have to, you know, turn off all that sort of empathy.
Adam
But if you just got to commit, and absolutely just just not even think about what’s going on, just exist in the moment and just let loose. Once you do that, then then it gets you know, it’s a little bit easier to get into the character mode. Now that I’ve done Johnno, a few times.
Karin
Yeah,
Adam
It was a little hard at first because you know, there was the accent and then there was the scene and then there was the, you know, the emotion and but
Karin
yeah,
Adam
I figured out the balance.
Karin
Yeah, it’s hard. It is hard. I think that’s cuz you, Adam, you, obviously Johnno doesn’t sound like you do. And I liked your British accent, though I had to throw in a line somewhere that Kat has that has he worked really hard when he moved to London to lose his Devon accent, ’cause this is not a Devon accent in any way shape or form.
And I made Johnno be from Exmouth because I used to live there and I was like, this is cool. I know. I know this. I know what this little city looks like. So that’s why. But yeah, and it’s actually kind of perfect that I’m interviewing the three of you because of course, you have very close interactions in the podcast because Charlotte plays Kirsten who is Kats mother, and of course Kat and Johnno have this very tumultuous relationship. Let’s just say that. That starts- you actually hear Johnno, Johnno is the first person that you hear apart from Janis and I in the prologue. And he just has one line.
And that’s where it starts off. So yeah,
Adam
The legend was born.
Karin
Yeah! Legendary villain is born. Yeah. But I was going to talk to Charlotte and Janis because you, like me, you act in a language that is not your own. So Charlotte, how what, what are your thoughts on that?
Charlotte
I think it’s, it might actually be easier than if, if I did it in Danish. Because I think if I did it in Danish, I would be overthinking. What does this sound like? And rather than just going with the flow and thinking well, the words are pronounced like so and so just just go ahead and do it. Now when I see Danish shows and it’s people who aren’t very experienced, it sounds very, it doesn’t have the same flow. And it just sounds artificial in some ways a bit robotic and very, I’m reading a script. And obviously, you are still at risk of sounding like you’re reading a script, because that is what you have in front of you. So that’s no memorizing it and just going with the flow of it, but I think it is easier to sound a bit more natural when it’s not in my my own language.
Karin
I love that. I hadn’t thought of it like that. But I think maybe it is for me too. And I think that that is a conversation that is definitely being had around, you know, Swedish films as well that a lot of the actors sound a little robotic, and like they’re reading a script. What’s your experience, Janis?
Janis
Like I said, I have no experience.
Karin
Well you’ve done it now!
Janis
I’ve done it now. Yeah, and I’m relying very heavily on you. To tell me how to pronounce things, because I don’t really have an ear for, for different accents. I don’t really know if I’m speaking American English or British English and Kat is someone who has supposedly lived in London for four years. So I think the British influence should definitely take over there. And so you have to remind me once in a while, it’s “can’t”.
Like, yeah,
Karin
Yeah, we’ve definitely had those conversations of “can’t” and what was the other one? It was “cast”, of course, and it was… We had the other day we were recording, you struggled with “Olivier” because it was Olivier theatre. And you were just like I can’t! I can’t say stupid Olivier! Oliviyer! Oliviurr! And you were like can, can they go to a different theatre? And I was like, no! This play was on in that year, at the Olivier! You got there in the end.
But we’ve been talking a little bit about in the cast discord that you started Janis about voice actor kryptonite I think you started Adam. And don’t I think it’s a spoiler to say what was your worst one
Adam
God, “watermelon and feta salad” it’s the transitions in fact that it’s the fact that the end sound at the end of “watermelon” and “and” together with my accent, just they collide and it’s a train wreck and so I have to really sit there and and just sound it out. It’s my Olivier. Yeah,
Karin
it’s your Olivier!
Adam
Watermelon and feta salad. I had to practice that about 14 times.
Karin
But you got there! I heard it!
Adam
Yeah, but you didn’t see what I cut out were all the swear words. That was three minutes
Karin
That might have made a really funny blooper, Adam,
Charlotte
You should always save those.
Karin
Yeah. Oh, you have lots of- Charlotte has lots of –
Adam
Every clip would be 45 minutes long!
Karin
Yeah OK. Fair enough. I think it depends a little bit on how blooper-y you are. But Charlotte has lots of sort of swearing at cars.
Charlotte
Yeah. Yeah. Lots of them. Yeah. It’s a lot of trying to be very serious and then stopping and going, and that’s a car. And that’s another car. Who needs cars anyway? I think I said at some point, I mean, I’m thinking I can hear them going past . So, I also have tractors sometimes. That’s great different sound.
Adam
I get that too
Charlotte
It’s wonderful.
Karin
I have helicopters because I live on the fifth floor and that makes a lot of noise. I think yeah, that might be a separate blooper reel just Y2K actors yelling, at various things going past
Janis
The Batmobile!
Karin
Kristy has a really long one where she, she’s sort of swearing at her neighbors who were standing yelling outside her window. It’s hilarious. And I turned the volume up and I can actually hear what they’re saying, but I’m not sure I can put that in the blooper reel. Yeah, but, Charlotte, I was about to call you Kristen there. Sorry. Surely… Do you have any voice actor kryptonite words?
Charlotte
Oh, I probably do. But I mean, that’s just the English language in general. You know, I mean, sometimes it’s really simple. And I’m like, practice this 10/20 times. I’ve got this down. And as soon as I hit record, it’s like, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah and nothing that makes sense comes out on I’m basically inventing a new language. Oh God, I have a lot of bloopers with stuff like that. Yeah,
Karin
No, I completely recognize that. And sometimes it’s the really simple lines that catch you out, isn’t it a sort of, there’s no reason why this very simple three word line of common words should trip me up.
Charlotte
But it does.
Karin
Yeah.
Charlotte
And trying to do it, like 10 times in a row, like, I’ve got this now. I’ve got this now, got this now. I could do it. Like when I’m just whispering it to myself going, Okay, these are the words. You have them down, and then it dies for some reason.
Karin
Yeah, well, these things happen don’t they.
Charlotte
Yeah.
Karin
I was gonna go to Adam cuz he I know you prepared something a question or a point of discussion or something. I was gonna hand it over to you
Adam 9
But I was going to ask, I know that a lot of the the show is based on some some past experiences. And I wondered if you could talk a little bit about how much the show is based on actual events and how much kind of there was a, you know, fictional element and introduced because I was curious about that.
Karin
Yeah. Okay, let’s see, how can I do this without spoiling anything? Okay, so it’s, it’s definitely more fictional than not, let’s start there. The original idea I had for this show was just you know, very simple two do long-distance friends sending each other voicemails and the story of one of them which is Kat having a very troubled relationship was a story that that is inspired by real experiences, certainly for me, but it’s you know, and it started off like that. And then I was like, but I can’t have the other person, which is Jess, can’t have her just be responding to this story, she has to have her own story because otherwise this is gonna be really weird and very boring. So Jess’s story is completely fictional, really. Though, I mean, there are elements in there that I can’t talk about, for spoilery reasons, that are definitely my experience. But it’s, I mean, the the character is very sort of, but then I wanted because Kat sort of, or, I should say, both Kat and Jess sort of started off as me. But like different aspects of my personality. And then as I was writing it, of course, which happens as I know that you write Adam, they sort of take on a life of their own and they’re their own people, you know. And of course, I cast you, Janis to play the Kat character, because, well, one at the time, I couldn’t do a Swedish accent I can now but I couldn’t. And also it felt too close and I didn’t want it to be so much me. And I think you’ve really made her your own, which I love. And also since I was writing, when I cast, well, when I cast you, Janis, I’d written maybe 10 episodes or something. When I cast the rest of you, I’d written about 27. I think. So the latter half of the season is written after I cast all of you, and is very much influenced by your performances, which I really love doing that, whatever I do next, I will try and and sort of consider that, that casting first is a really cool thing when you’re writing. So yeah, does that answer your question, sort of?
Adam
It does it does. I love the, I mean, the story is really compelling. And I just, I know that you had revealed some, some, some details. And so I wondered how that melded with a fictional moment. So I really liked the fact that you’re able to do that and I think tha t the fact that I’m a guy if you hadn’t said anything, I would have thought that this was, you know, almost actual events just the the vehicle or the framework was the what was being used to tell the story. I wouldn’t I wouldn’t know the difference.
Karin
Cool. Oh, wow. That is a compliment from a fellow writer. Thank you so much, Adam. Cool. Wow. Okay. Well, I might actually once we hit into spoiler territory, say some more things about this, but I’ll leave it there for now. I think, Charlotte, you had a point of discussion as well.
Charlotte
Yeah. And I’m glad I had a couple of them because Adam stole my first one! So, okay! Always good with a plan B. I was wondering a bit about the process of doing Y2K. I mean, are you doing everything because it’s, it’s sometimes seems like, I mean, it’s writing, directing, editing, everything.
Karin
Yes, I mean, the short answer is yes. I do everything. It’s, it’s what I, first of all, it’s kind of my thing. I’m one of those people who just do things. And I love, I love a project. And this is, this is a project. And when it came when it comes to editing, I was sort of hoping to get some help. And then I realized that that’s going to be expensive, and I’m cheap. So I’m just gonna do it myself. And, I mean, I have lots of audio drama friends who edit, you know, like sci fi shows, with like, 10 people in conversation at the same time and wacky you know, laser fights or stuff like that. And this is not that. I mean, there are definite sound effects going on and also ambience backgrounds and things like that, but the main things are very sort of home like scences. So, you know, it’s it’s doors and washing machines and, you know, footsteps, so many footsteps and you know, and also of course a lots of sort of have this sort of clicka and modem thing that I put into the voicemails, stuff like that. And again, I mean, it’s, I’m, at the point of recording, I’m editing Episode 20 out of 54. And then there are four Patreon episodes. So I’m not there yet, but my goal is to be sort of halfway once we release episode one, so to be at 27 and I think I’ll be able to do that. But as you know, cuz you have read the scripts, they get more complicated as the season wears on. So more, you know, more sound effects more people in conversation at the same time because you know, I started off with this, as I was talking about before this very simple idea of two people doing voicemails. And then I added this sort of what seemed like a simple framework idea of, you know, one person finding these voicemails 20 years later. And then I couldn’t help myself. I just started adding people in. And, you know, it’s and I love that I did, because I’m so I’m so thrilled with all of you and your performances and what that brings to the story. So I’m really glad that I did, but yes, it’s more work. What I am getting some help with is marketing. I have two lovely people who are assisting me on that, though, you know, I do a lot of that too. Yeah. Because like, it’s one of those things where social media marketing requires sort of that you’re just there on social media and talk to people really engage and communicate and, you know, that kind of has to be me, I think, at least for now. Does that answer your question?
Charlotte
Yeah, yeah.
Karin
You just do!
Before we stop, I’d like you to tell us where people can find you if they would like to find you. And I’m not sure that Janis has anywhere but I know that the other two of you do so I’m going to start with Charlotte. How can people find you?
Charlotte
I think the easiest way to find me is on Twitter. And it’s basically just my name. So it’s Charlotte underscore Norup. (n o r u p). I’m on Instagram But it’s like it’s a mix of whatever weird stuff happens in my personal life! And podcasting, so might not be as interesting, but it’s 2 shy- two, the number two, s h y. Norup. And I have a VA Facebook page. Yeah. Stuff like that. I think. Yeah, that works. I don’t know if you can just do a search for me or something. I don’t know.
Karin
Yeah, it’s on the y2k website.
Charlotte
Okay
Karin
Y2Kpod.com and that’s the number two. I’m gonna let you say it anyway! So Adam, how can people find you?
Charlotte
You can do it!
Adam
So you can find me on Twitter at Doc (d o c) underscore, Adam underscore VO. So that’s really my main my main means of contact. You know, you can find me on a bunch of different podcasts like The Insomnia Project and I’m gonna be on another one, like, we’re coming up with a Christmas episode too. I wrote that and then we’re going to have a week to put everything together for the audio. So pray for me!
Karin
You can do it.
Adam
Well, we did the 11th hour audio. We submitted it on the 11th hour
Charlotte
Yeah, exactly.
Adam
With minutes to spare, literally.
Charlotte
Yeah.
Adam
So
Charlotte
It wasn’t saying
Karin
I was just watching that from on social media. And I was like, these people are just amazing.
Adam
Oh, yeah. But yeah, so really Twitter’s The best way to get get in touch with me and then you know, listen for me and different podcasts and go oh hey there’s Adam. Or is it?
Karin
Or is it! And Janis I guess if people want to get in touch with you they can get in touch with me first. I guess.
Janis
Yeah, just yeah come to Alingsås, Sweden, and look for the person with the weird hair color. Right now it’s pink, purple. That will probably change but yeah, I don’t do social media just so yeah, I like people to contact you!
Karin
Yes, talk to me. You can find me on Twitter at Karin h e i m, so that’s K a r i n H e i m. So that’s my my name sort of, but not all of it because I thought I was too long. So KarinHeim. And of course you can find all of this at our website at y2kpod.com as well.
Okay, cool. I think it’s time to say goodbye to the listeners!
Oh, oceans of hugs!
Transcribed by https://otter.ai
Transcript edited and polished by Paola Massimo.
BEHIND THE SCENES 2: CAST INTERVIEW – Kirsty, Felicity, Lorcan
Karin
Hi, Karin here, creator of Y2K. You are about to hear a wonderful cast interview. Before we start I just wanted to let you know that when we recorded it we recorded it in two parts. So the first part is the non-spoilery version, which you’ll be hearing today, and the second part is the spoilery section which you’ll be hearing at a later date when the spoilery bits have all aired. Enjoy the non-spoilery version today.
(INTRO MUSIC)
Right! Hi, my name is Karin Heimdahl and I am the creator of Y2K and I am sitting here in an online room with three of our wonderful cast members. And I’m going to ask them to introduce themselves, of course give you their name and the character they’re playing. And also just tell us where in the world they are and what time it is because that is fascinating. Why don’t you start Kirsty?
Kirsty
So hello everyone, I’m Kirsty Woolven, I play Olivia. I live in the UK, and at the moment is 20 past seven in the evening.
Karin
Right. Okay, Felicity.
Felicity
I’m Felicity, I play Rachel and I am sitting in a sunny room at 20 past eight in the morning in New Zealand.
Karin
Yay! And Lorcan?
Lorcan
Hello, my name is Lorcan. I am in Dublin. Oh, I’m sorry, I play Bri, and it is also 20 past seven at night.
Karin
Yes, exactly. And I am- I play Jess. And I am in Gothenburg, Sweden, and it is 20 past eight in the evening. So, we are far apart. But yeah! So let’s get started. I’m sort of interested in your voice acting backgrounds a little bit and I know that some of you have done more than others. So why don’t we start with you, Felicity?
Felicity
This is my first big one. I’ve done- yeah, a couple of just small one or two line things in the past and done a few audio book samples and things. But yeah, this is the first chance I’ve had to actually get into a character and play something. So it’s been an awesome experience.
Karin
Oh, cool. Great. Okay, Kirsty?
Kirsty
So I started doing voiceover acting… actually it was kind of more like this time last year actually it’s roughly around a year now. And again, like Felicity this is kind of like my first big role that I was cast and like before I’d done like little bitty bits but I’ve been in quite a few things over this past year. Yeah.
Karin
You’ve been cast in a few things after I cast you for this and of course no one’s heard you in this yet.
Kirsty
No! I think the things after I was cast in Y2K are Soulborn City, Haunted Hell House of Horror, which are both out and then also a new podcast that you are in also as well Karin, Luminaris Brimstone.
Karin
Yeah, yeah cool!
I only have a tiny little bit part in the prologue.
Kirsty
Same.
Karin
Fun though!
Kirsty
Yeah, definitely.
Karin
Cool. Okay, and Lorcan?
Lorcan
Yeah, this was the very first voice acting thing I’d ever done. And it was so nice to be involved because again, I suppose I had done kind of more theater stuff. And even that was pretty limited. So this was one of the first times a long time that I probably got to do kind of like a character and it was just really nice was really cool to be involved.
Karin
Yeah. Good. I mean, and you are a singer as well of course.
Lorcan
Yeah.
Karin
And yeah, and Kirsty is also a singer
Lorcan
Oh, lovely!
Karin
Yeah.
Kirsty
I don’t do any singing in this.
Karin
I know I’ve been sort of thinking of if I could work that in somehow and I really just can’t, so… sorry!
Lorcan
You’ll have to do another podcast then.
Karin
Oh, yes! Absolutely!
But, of course I mean- you are all three of you are here because you auditioned for this and I didn’t know any of you beforehand. So I’m really curious what made you want to audition for this project? Let’s start with Lorcan.
Lorcan
I just loved the brief of it. I really appreciate it as well. Like I think with the character that I auditioned for, I auditioned for two characters, I can’t remember-
Karin
You auditioned for Claire as well. Yeah,
Lorcan
Yep, yep, yep.
And- but I really appreciated the way that you had kind of written about Bri like this. It’s kind of it wasn’t open to interpretation, but I think you were kind of willing to, you know, if a trans person kind of auditioned for the role that maybe that would be taken into account with it. I really appreciated that. Because on StarNow, which is where I saw the listing, like trans roles, that’s, like, not a thing, you know, like, it’s really, really rare and it’s quite problematic and a lot of ways because I often find that I’m just kind of applying for female roles and then it creates- I don’t know. Like, I find that I don’t get that many callbacks and stuff. And sometimes I wonder I’m like, Is it because I don’t know, they’re afraid that when a trans person is kind of playing a female role that changes the role or something or brings this I don’t know, I you know, I don’t know what, what they think. But so anyway, it was just really refreshing to see that you wanted this kind of inclusivity and I really, really appreciated it, you know?
Karin
Oh, great,
Lorcan
It was a big, big draw for me.
Karin
Yeah. And I actually-, you keep calling her Bree, which is a tiny spoiler, but not a big one. Because she’s Bri at the beginning. She changes her name to Bree so we’re going to probably say Bri and Bree interchangeably in this interview, and you’re gonna have to deal with that listeners! But, I mean, Bri was written as a trans character. Bri of course is Jess’s sibling- my sibling. I was very sure that I wanted a trans actor to play the trans character. And of course, and I had quite a few, which I was thrilled about because, you know, it’s, it can be hard to find people who are, who are part of a marginalized group to sort of even reach those actors and to make them understand that yes, I want you to be a part of this. And it was also really, really, I wanted everyone to be able to audition for whatever they felt like. And you I mean, you auditioned for Claire as well Lorcan. And you were definitely in the running for that as well. I think it was your singing that clinched you for, for Bree.
So yeah, cool. Okay. Felicity, how did you hear about this?
Felicity
Um, it was StarNow as well. I actually I saw the, the listing and I was like, “Oh I’ll favorite that and i’ll come back to it.” Because I think I was out and about, and the next thing I know I actually had a message from you on Instagram!
Karin
Yeah.
Felicity
And you said you know would you audition for this and I was like heck yeah! I think it’s just because you don’t get a lot of parts for the New Zealand accent. It’s- and it’s often mistaken for Australian and sometimes South African and people aren’t looking for that. So it was really exciting to see that as an opportunity to not try and put on awful American accent or something! I could use my own voice which was actually a pretty awesome opportunity. So um, yeah, no, it’s it’s nice. And this is how I sound regularly and Rachel gets the same- the same accent.
Karin
Yeah,
Felicity
Yeah, pretty horrendous sometimes, sorry about that guys! but um-
Lorcan
No, it’s lovely!
Karin
Yeah. We all love your accent!
Felicity
Yeah, you haven’t walked out, you know, fish and chips and everything. So I’ll take it.
Karin
Yeah, I mean, I didn’t make it easy for myself setting this in New Zealand, partially but I mean, I set it in New Zealand because I visited New Zealand in 2010. And I just, I just fell in love with this country and these lovely people and I was like, Oh my god, I love it so much, I have to set this there! And so yeah, but also, I mean, I had a lot of Australian voice actors auditioning for the character of Rachel. And some of them did, you know, pretty good New Zealand accents, but you know.
Ended up with the real thing!
Lorcan
Oh, sorry. I was just gonna say what what is and sorry, I don’t want to offend you, i’m just curious. Like, what is the main difference between like the Australian and the New Zealand accent if you could like verbalize that?
Felicity
probably easiest one would be “fish and chips” versus “fish and chips”.
Karin
Yeah!
Felicity
The big difference, yeah. We say, you know, yeah, “five, six” or “five, six”.
Karin
Yeah.
Felicity
That I sound. We become very ‘a’ and they become very ‘e’.
Lorcan
Interesting. Okay.
Felicity
Yeah. So it’s really obvious to Kiwis and Aussie’s
Lorcan
Sure
Felicity
Hard to pick it out, but yeah. A lot of other differences each other. You can’t resent it, you know, just because we Australia’s little sister, or little brother.
Karin
Well, you are very much in the focus for this show. So you know,
Felicity
That’s awesome that New Zeland’s see this getting a bit of a spotlight so it’s not Lord of the Rings.
Karin
Exactly. Kirsty, it’s your turn. How did you hear about this?
Kirsty
Um, so I think I’m probably the only one out of us lot that heard about this on on Twitter because it’s quite an active audio drama community especially within the UK. I don’t know about other countries as much but it’s definitely very strong in the audio drama, um, community on- in the UK. So I think there’s Sarah Golding. She’s got a Twitter page, where she just retweets all audio drama. Yeah, exactly. So I think I found it via that page. And then I had a look, I know I- I auditioned for Olivia, obviously. I can’t remember if I auditioned for anyone else. But with Olivia, it was just that when I was reading it, I was like, oh, Olivia lives in Birmingham. I live near Birmingham. She’s into rocks and fossils. Like that was a cool thing I found as a kid, and not gonna spoil anything, but it’s kind of creepy how many similarities there are between us, that I did not know until I was cast and we started having little meetings and Karin started telling us a bit more about the story.
Karin
Yeah. We can have a little chat about that in the spoiler section if you want.
Kirsty
Yeah definitley.
Karin
Yeah. Your name Kirsty, I mean, of course, we’ve been sort of brushing past each other on Twitter and in some other projects that we were both sort of had bit-parts.
Kirsty
Yeah, the Kingery.
Karin
Yeah,
Kirsty
That’s where I first saw, well heard you, I suppose.
Karin
Yeah.
Kirsty
Oh, and also podUK we were both at that.
Karin
We were but we didn’t meet!
Kirsty
We didn’t see each other! I don’t get that still!
Karin
We were in- So we were at the same event in, in February of 2019. And yes, I don’t even remember seeing you there, which is-
Kirsty
No! We were in the same workshops too!
Karin
There were lots of people. We’re definitely seeing each other this year because we’re sharing a table!
Kirsty
Yay!
Karin
So, that’s going to be really good. Cool. Okay. We already actually talked about accents and of course Felicity you record in your own accent. And Kirsty, you sort of record in your own accent, though you try to make it a little bit more general, I think, right?
Kirsty
Do I? I just be myself! I don’t try because like, like, I have to record so much for Olivia. I don’t intentionally really do it. I mean, there may be slight differences between different batches of scripts because we’ve been recording in roughly batches of 10. And all recorded I should say, we’ve always recorded everything As of early mid December 2019. So, yeah, I’ve not intentionally recorded in a different accent because people say cuz, well, at least for England, there’s a very strong skew towards the south. And that’s where I’m from. So most people say I’ve got a neautral-ish accent for England. Even though I don’t sound northern at all. I sound quite southern, but-
Lorcan
Yeah.
Karin
But I think also Kirsty has epic bloopers. She’s the epic-est of all the epic bloopers and the the most epic sort of chatting to herself in between takes and it is just the most charming thing. And I have long, long long recordings of lovely bloopers, but you keep doing the sort of “Oh, I sound quite posh now! Don’t I? I have to be little-“
Kirsty
I know, there’s a really big thing because poshness is not a positive thing where I’m from. It kind of means that you’re a bit snobby and above everyone else, which I don’t think I am, but there we go.
Karin
No, I don’t think you are either. And then sometimes you go “Oh, that’s a bit chavvy!”. I can’t do that-
Kirsty
Yeah. That’s like the opposite.
Yeah, because I went to uni in Kent which is surprisingly- if you stay.. so Kent’s in the southeast so it’s kind of generally the posh fancy bit of the UK for those who or England for those who don’t know the geography so the assumption is that everyone’s very posh and sounds like they speak like the Queen. If you go away from like Canterbury because there’s people from all over the world and the UK there because there’s lots of universities but if you go everywhere else it’s quite it’s quite rundown deprived kind of stuff like that and they don’t speak how I do they do speak more chavvy, which is really difficult to explain if you’re not from the UK. I don’t know Lorcan, do you know what chavvy means?
Lorcan
I do, yep!
Kirsty
Yeah, see, like, you know what I mean, but yeah.
Lorcan
I guess I know in Australia, I suppose. I don’t know if it’s the same word New Zealand but there’s like bogan.
Felicity
Perfect pronunciation!
Lorcan
But I don’t know do you use that word in New Zealand as well?
Felicity
Yeah, yeah, we got a couple of bogan places around.
Lorcan
I love that word. That’s a really funny word in Ireland we say scanger which is not very nice.
Kirsty
Did you just say like scanger?
Lorcan
Yes. Scanger.
Kirsty
Oh,
Lorcan
Yeah. I know they have a couple of different.. Yeah, that’s what they say.
Karin
If we’re on the subject of accents. Of course, you and I Lorcan, we both pretend to be Canadian.
Lorcan
I know! Well, I’m lucky because- so I went to an international school in Saudi Arabia till I was 13. And my accent is- was really kind of North American for a long time, and it still is actually like, really, it’s, you know, so it was my accent is like sometimes people actually do think that I’m Canadian, so I was like, oh, great!
Kirsty
You sound Irish to me. You don’t sound like really, really strong Irish though, but I can definitely hear it.
Lorcan
Yeah, it’s there a bit. Because I’ve been so been in Ireland now for maybe, maybe longer, I suppose. Yeah, Yes, I have!
I’m just pretending to myself that I’m much younger than I am.
Um, yeah. I think certain words I say sound a bit American and then yeah. Yeah.
It’s very it’s very neutral as well Karin though, like,
Karin
Well, it’s very American, really.
Lorcan
Yeah.
Karin
And it’s funny, but I mean, I picked up my American accent in an international school in Brussels. So I didn’t know-
Lorcan
It’s a thing though, isn’t it? It’s international schools have this like, it’s like a North American but not really. It’s mad.
Karin
Yeah,
Lorcan
It’s very, very interesting. Were your teachers American?
Karin
Yeah, most of them were. We’ve had some British teachers as well. And I think because I was taught at English is my second language. And I was taught it in school with a very sort of British accent, the general British accent that we were talking about before that doesn’t actually exist. But anyway, that sort of Southern England-ish accent. And so I had kind of had to make a choice as a teenager which way to go and but all my friends were American, being all American! Yeah. And it’s handy because, you know, north, mainly people from the US or from Canada, if they don’t think I’m American of some sort, usually sort of East Coast American, they think I’m Canadian, and I was like, yeah, that works. I’ll just- I’ll be a Canadian who spent lots of years in London and it’s not easy and so you know, any weird things about the accent can be excused because she’s been living everywhere else!
Lorcan
That’s so funny Karin, I’m the same because it’s always sometimes whenever people like where are you from? I’m like, this is such a long story like and it’s I feel like I have actually had people be like, I didn’t want to know that much.
Because I’m like well, I went to an international school, but my parents are from here and then they’re just like, like, whatever! You know?
Karin
I know, I know I, I’ve sort of I’ve had to do that so much over the years and I’ve sort of abbreviated it to either I’m Swedish. Or I’m Swedish and I don’t sound Swedish. But nevermind.
Lorcan
I know, God. So funny.
Karin
Yeah. I love that. Okay, so yeah, your characters still in non “spoilery zone”. So anything you can say about the sort of taking on of your characters without being spoilery? Let’s start with Felicity.
Felicity
I could relate to her cheerfulness. You know? She always seemed positive and upbeat and upfront about her feelings and you know, Where she is in her life, which I actually really liked. And it was it was nice to be able to be cheerful about everything. So um, yeah, that was that was really fun and I only had sort of one or two tongue twisters. Thank you, Karin. Yeah, some of the others had a few that were a little bit more difficult than mine. Yeah, no, she’s she’s just a fun character to play. Yeah,
Karin 20:25
Yeah.
Felicity
She’s awesome. And I wouldn’t mind being a librarian! I don’t think that’s a spoiler.
Karin
That’s not a spoiler. Rachel is a librarian and yeah!
Felicity
Yeah, that’s that’s not a bad career choice.
Karin
Yeah, I have. That’s not a spoiler either. We have some scenes set in libraries. And I just, I just love that I love adding that ambiance in instead of feeling the library feeling.
Felicity
It almost sometimes feels like a sort of background secondary character ’cause-
Karin
Yeah!
Felicity
-Maia has got connection to the library as well, through you know work and art and everything and it’s, it’s nice to always have that, that anchor in the background.
Karin
It’s true. It’s true.
Felicity
Yeah.
Karin
I like that. Kirsty! Anything you can say about Olivia?
Kirsty
Um, that’s a bit difficult because-
Karin
Yeah!
Kirsty
She- she’s quite a private person especially in the beginning. Yeah, I mean when I’ve always been recording it’s been quite easy to imagine because I just imagined her standing in front of the microphone, which is also what I’m doing when when I record but yeah. I don’t know how much I can-.
Karin
Well, we can leave you because-
Kirsty
Yeah, cool.
Karin
Pretty mysterious at the beginning.
Kirsty
Yeah, she definitely keeps everything in for quite a while.
Karin
Yeah. Really, she does.
Kirsty
Yeah.
Karin
And Bree, or Bri.
Lorcan
Well, I just I really liked you know, there was a lot of things that I kind of, obviously could relate to with Bri like, just the trans experience. Also, Bri’s a musician there was there was that- um okay. I just want to say spoiler… Well, it’s not a spoiler, I don’t think. there was just a line that you wrote that I really loved. And it was it was when I was like, why didn’t you kind of pursue music full time, and this was when Bri was Bree, and Bree was like… I don’t know you just said it in this way that I really liked it she was like I’m kind of an introvert. You know, when I really like it really. I related to it so much. I was like, God that is so me like with it because it’s like, I love to do this. I love to songwrite, but I get really shy and scared and a lot of ways and it was just one thing that I really liked about her and I kind of liked. I think the way that you had described it as first as well was like kind of a reference point you used was Oz from Buffy.
Karin
Yeah.
Lorcan
I loved that so much. And I always when I was recording it, I would always try and remember that. And so this kind of quiet, you know, she’s kind of, I think like a lot of trans people, we end up spending a lot of time in our heads, kind of imagining this, the sort of the world that we want to be, or the way that we want to look, I suppose I know for me, that’s not what I did a lot, like, lot of daydreaming about the way that you know about being a woman and all this kind of stuff. And so it means that you end up being quite an introverted kind of a person in a lot of ways and I just saw that and in Bri and in Bree and I could really kind of channel what I was going through I suppose. You know, I really like that. Yeah,
Karin
Because, I mean I I’m a very close friend of mine is trans and transitioned around this time. And she’s been helping me a little bit with just that perspective, because of course, I don’t have that perspective myself. But I originally, what the first scene I was writing with Bri as she was then I didn’t I thought she would be more like my friend who is much more outgoing than Bri is and much more outspoken and takes up more room, you know? And I just started writing her and she’s just not not that she is very sort of. She chooses her words very carefully. She’s very, very, I think I use innately cool, which for me is Oz from Buffy very much. She’s very, very thinking and she has when she says something it’s really thought through. And she isn’t sort of easily upset or budged, at least not outwardly. And she is a bit of an introvert. And I was just like, Okay, so this is nothing like my friend. This is a new character, hello, new character! I’m going to get to know you now!
Felicity
She changed though, you know, across the series, when she’s first introduced as Bri, very closed in, and you can understand, given her her life, you seem to understand why she’s like that.
Karin
Yeah.
Felicity
Yeah. And then as you go along she’s still very careful with what words she picks and how she speaks. But there’s so much more emotion and she feels more open, especially with Jess, and just the emotional connection between them you can feel it, you know, build and become stronger which is which is pretty awesome to see so well written.
Karin
Oh, thank you!
Lorcan
Really well written.
Karin
I love that. I’m gonna- we’re going to very soon head into the spoilery section, but I’m going to hand over to you Felicity because you had a question or a comment or something before we head over.
Felicity
We kind of touched on it before a little bit with with tongue twisters and recording mishaps but um, I wanted to ask everyone if if you guys had any sort of favorite mishaps or tongue twisters it took you a while to get out.
Karin
Why don’t you start Kirsty!
Kirsty
I had a hell of the time with the word ingratiate. I did not know that was a word before I had to Google it! I did not know what it means! Um, yeah. There’s also all the place names, you guys know where those place names are from?
Karin
We can’t tell that!
Kirsty
Can’t say anymore, but those, those yeah. That was- those were really frustrating! And I’m sure like I don’t know if you’ve listened to those lot yeah, but I get to a word and I’m just like I’m gonna have to stop the recording and look up how to say it again!
Karin
Yes, I’ve listened, Kirsty because Kirsty’s recording for so long I’ve listened to the first take of everything but I haven’t listened to all the takes of everything.
Kirsty
Yeah, I don’t blame you. There’s like, twenty-, because I keep a track of how long I record stuff just as an interesting thing. There’s 21 and a half hours of stuff. Yeah,
Karin
Olivia talks a lot!
Kirsty
Yeah, yeah, yeah. That’s not including because me and Anna have got to still record a little bit more. So that’s not including- not including that bit and anything else I have to redo whenever.
Karin
Well, we shall see!.
Kirsty
We will see, yeah.
Karin
We will see. I’m probably I mean for you, Kiristy, I’m probably gonna ask you to do a few bits and bobs, you know, short bits.
Kirsty
Good. Not any long!
Karin
No, no! You’ve done all your monologues. They are all done. But, you know. Maybe a few sentences for a bit.
Kirsty
Yeah, that’s cool.
Karin
Yeah. How about you Lorcan? The sort of either tongue twisters or things you got stuck on?
Lorcan
That one, when you were like, “it’s actually a French word!”. I was like, oh, Carcassone one, something like that. And then it was like, well, it’s actually like Carcassone. I was like, Oh, okay. And I knew even I was like, What? I was like, whaaat? I didn’t know that that was.
Karin
Okay, I think we’re pretty much done. I was going to ask you to just tell the listeners where they can find you in social media, Twitter or Instagram or wherever. Why don’t you start Kirsty?
Kirsty
So, I have Twitter, and Instagram @ Kirsty Woolven. And I’ll spell that because there’s a shocking amount of people who don’t know how to spell Woolven. So it’s K i r s t y W o o l v e n.
Karin
Beautiful. Lorcan, where can people find you?
Lorcan
I actually at the moment don’t have any social media. I ended up deleting it because I was like this is actually making me feel kind of not good. So for the moment I’m not sure.
Karin
Contact me and I will email Lorcan.
Lorcan
Yeah, yeah,
Karin
That works! Felicity?
Felicity
If you look interested in looking at pictures of cooking disasters, and, and foster cats and dogs, then I’m on Instagram @flick.boyd
Karin
Yeah
Felicity
f l i c k . b o y d. So nothing too exciting, but lots of disasters!
Karin
I follow you on Instagram! I love your your cookies and cats!
Felicity
You say that. Luckily my partner eats pretty much anything I create. So I’ve got a disposal right there! But um, one day I might actually have success and I don’t know what to do with it.
Kirsty
The cat paws in the pastry sheet are so adorable!
Felicity
Yes, see it- I had I had the pastry sheet just thawing on the bench. And the cat knows he is not allowed on the bench! And he just jumped straight up, straight onto the pastry sheet!
Kirsty
This is Widget?! This is the cat that appeared when we were doing our little read through wasn’t it? like weeks ago!
Felicity
One recording I had you know my door closed and everything and I was recording away and he decided to meow the loudest meow ever! It occurred just as I said “Hello Kat”! I came prepared today in case he interrupted. I’ve got a bag of treats right here to distract him.
Karin
Oh, that’s lovely. It’s lovely. And of course you can find me on Twitter most easily. I think @karinheim that’s K a r i n h e i m. And all of this can be found on our website at y2kpod.com. That’s the number two And as I said, just contact me if you want to get in touch with Lorcan. Okay. And I guess it’s oceans of hugs, maybe oceans of hugs! Bye!
Transcribed by https://otter.ai
Transcript edited and polished by Paola Massimo.
BEHIND THE SCENES 3
Karin
Hi, Karin here, creator of Y2K. You are about to hear a wonderful cast interview. Before we start I just wanted to let you know that when we recorded it we recorded it in two parts. So the first part is the non-spoilery version, which you’ll be hearing today, and the second part is the spoilery section which you’ll be hearing at a later date when the spoilery bits have all aired. Enjoy the non-spoilery version today.
(INTRO MUSIC)
Hello, my name is Karin Heimdahl. I’m the creator of Y2K. And I’m sitting here in a beautiful online space with three of our cast members. And I’m going to ask them to introduce themselves and to tell you their name, of course and the name of their character. And also where they are. For all the other interviews have asked about the time but I think this is going to be a little dull, but you know, whoever starts you can tell me what time it is. Okay. Nerys you want to start?
Nerys
Okay, I’m Nerys. I play Emma and it is exactly 7:47pm.
Karin
And where are you?
Nerys
Oh, where am I am in Wales.
Karin
Great. Okay, Maddy.
Maddy
Hi, I’m Maddy. I play Claire. And here it is Edinburgh and it’s currently also 7:47pm. Yay.
Karin
Anjali.
Anjali
Hi, I’m Anjali. I play Shirin and it is 2:47pm in Washington DC.
Karin
Yay. Okay, I thought you were in the UK.
Anjali
I was in London just got back to DC Friday. Yeah.
Karin
Okay. Are you home for the holidays? Are you going back?
Anjali
I am. Yeah.
Karin
Oh, no, not it’s not dull. Good. No. Yeah. Brilliant. Okay, good. That’s surprised me right off. Okay. And I am in Gothenburg, Sweden, and it is 8:48pm. Now, because it’s been a whole minute since Maddy said her time. Okay, cool. So we are at least in three different time zones. I thought we were only two. But you’re going back to London after?
Anjali
Yeah, I’m going back in January. And then I’ll be there until June.
Karin
Yeah. Wow. So some some kind of exchange student thing.
Anjali
Year long study abroad? Yeah.
Karin
Lovely.
Anjali
Yeah.
Karin
Good, because when I cast you, Anjali, you were definitely in the US. And I know that you were sort of in London this past semester. Cool. Okay. Now, I’m really curious. And I know, it’s sort of different for all of you. I’m really curious about what got you into voice acting and sort of your voice acting background? Why don’t you start Maddy?
Maddy
So, um, I’ve been in for a long time, like in primary school, I was in doing drama clubs and things like that, and acting out scenes from Harry Potter and all this kind of thing. But, it continued through secondary school and university, but I never really thought about doing voice acting stuff until I did my radio MA. And so that was at Goldsmiths in London. And I obviously really enjoyed drama and stuff, but I wasn’t really sure what kind of programs I wanted to make or what things I wanted to do. But partially it was Ella Watts amazing Ella Watts of UK podcast fame, doing a presentation about different audio fiction podcasts. And I was like, Oh, this is this is a whole thing that I could do. I love drama, I love TV drama film, that and I love audio. So just combining lots of my favorite things. And so then, when we were doing our little kind of productions for the, for our masters, I did the tiny bit of voice acting for one of my friends pieces, I think I was playing a scented candle. So and, and I was just like, Oh, I hadn’t considered I could bring my acting stuff from my past into this as well. So then when I wanted to do my own podcast, I thought, well, just I’ll just voice both main characters, because I’ll just make life hard for myself why not. And so the prequel of papers was born. And and that’s kind of where it all started off. And then I did it a little tiny bit part in of two lines in Windfall a few months ago, just to help them out because they needed more like crowd scene stuff. And then Y2K came along. And this is my first proper thing of being cast by someone else. So thank you very much for that.
Karin
Oh, lovely. Well, but you do a lot of voice acting in The Prickwillow Papers. So it’s not like you’re new to the
Maddy
Yes, it’s quite a lot and I often just kind of I, instead of recording just still deadlines, and then just squirms lines, the two main characters, I tend to alternate between them. So I can know how to react to myself in a weird way. So not so much. It’s basically like me having a chat with myself in my dining room trying to catch the server by recording. So
Karin
it is, it took me a while I was listening to the first episode of the particular papers, and it took me a while to figure out that it was you, both of them. And when I realized I was just like, austrac. It’s so cool. Thank you. How about you, Anjali?
Anjali
Well, I have the opposite story I have, I really didn’t have a lot of performance background at all. I think like, for a very long time, I was just like, not confident enough. didn’t think I could do something like that years of Speech and Debate later, I started to feel like maybe, maybe I could maybe, maybe, maybe it’s okay, maybe I’m not like just some random person deciding that they’re good at something like I can actually give it a shot and see how it goes, which I which I’m realizing is more common of a story than I initially expected. But this past summer, I kind of just sort of fell in love with a lot of different podcasts and audio dramas. And I thought, why not try performance through this avenue. So I auditioned for a few different roles. And Y2K. This was one of the first that I had gotten. And so it’s kind of just been a crazy journey since in the last like six months. So very happily surprised by how incredible the community is how like, how supportive they are, and how like someone like me, where I feel like I came out of nowhere, didn’t know anything was sort of taken in with open arms. And so it’s been really good. Yeah.
Karin
Lovely. Yeah, well, I think we can all attest to that the beauty of the community, How about you Nerys?
Nerys
similar story and kind of not having any kind of background and no background in like anything to do like acting or drama or anything at all, like how I got into voice acting, it was kind of on September, last year. And it was a thing We Fix Space Junk did for their patrons, they were looking for, like background voices for season two. And that was that was what started it off kind of recorded a few kind of bits. They’re kind of improvised some lines, they gave us kind of a few examples. I kind of went off from that. And did that. And kind of you can hear me kind of in the background of like, quite a few episodes isn’t too. And after that was kind of thinking, yeah, I really enjoyed doing this, or is this something I can do? I don’t have any kind of background in it. And what really kind of made me think, okay, I can try to do this, I might not be any good at it and might not go anywhere. But I want to try was PodUK in February, and I was just so inspired by meeting so many like amazing people from the audio fiction community talking with some of them. Like I spoke with Sarah Golding a little bit about voice acting, and it’s made me really, really excited about it. And like I really wanted to try and have auditioned for quite a few things this year. Y2K was one of the first things and it’s the sort of the biggest thing I’ve done so far. That isn’t my own thing. And I really enjoy it. It’s good. It’s great. I was just having so much fun with it. And it’s just like, so amazing. They kind of come from nowhere, and it’s something I love doing so much now.
Karin
Yeah, I can definitely relate to that because I was at PodUK too. And I didn’t meet you. I didn’t meet Kirsty e ither and Maddy I think, are you there?
Maddy
Yeah, I was there as well.
Karin
Didn’t meet you either. Which is a little silly
Anjali
This year, guys. This year.
Karin
We’re sharing a table this year. So hopefully, we will be able maybe you can make it to Anjali. Yeah. Cool. Yeah. Look into that. love to have you there. Yeah, I was completely inspired by PodUK as well. And although I already had Y2K, sort of, I think the first three episodes written or something at the time, but you know, very, very inspiring. So Ah, yeah, Y2K. What made you interested in auditioning because you all are different? How about you Nerys?
Nerys
I just really like the kind of the concept of it and I remember like 2000 quite clearly because I was 13 New Year’s Eve 1999. So for me, it was kind of like there’s a big kind of nostalgia thing going back to kind of when I was a teenager, like, obviously, you know, the show itself is very different, you know, people in their 20s. But I just really like the idea of kind of going back in to that period and kind of be like reliving it a little again, and idea, the kind of concept of like Olivia, as well, like, what she finds and kind of how that develops and how you’ve got these two separate years and how they kind of interlink and everything I just really, you know, that was kind of obviously came up, as it went on. But yeah, it’s just like the initial, I just really like the story as well, and how this kind of people all over, like different parts of the world as well, that really appealed, appealed to me. And just how like, big the project was, as well as thinking, wow, you know, if I can be involved in this, it’s such a huge thing. It’s gonna be all year. So yeah, I remember seeing the casting call thinking this sounds really, really, really interesting. Something big, something bit different. And it just felt really, really exciting to me.
Karin
Wonderful, Anjali, you’re nodding?
Anjali
Yeah, um, I can relate to part of that the first part less so just because I was born like, 18 days before 2000. So yeah, not not so much nostalgia. But still, that part’s amazing as well, I would say, yeah, the concept of the story and the way that it interacts between times between so many different places, I felt like was a big draw. For me. I thought, when I saw the casting call, it was just like, an incredible opportunity that I that seemed very unique. I hadn’t seen anything like that, in the very short time that I was, you know, even looking at gay. So I feel like that was probably the biggest draw for me. Yeah.
Karin
Lovely. Maddy, you were nodding, as well. A little bit.
Unknown Speaker
Yes. I think also agree that Well, I didn’t know the time period as well. I was five in the year 2000. Sir, a lot of primary school memories of Kylie Minogue, and Steps and things like that. So yeah, but the the idea of the voicemails I really liked. And I only afterwards started listening to Love and Luck. And I really loved that. And I know that that was part of the inspiration for the show as well. And it’s just a lovely concept. And also just looking through the characters. I just like the idea of Claire, because in my real life, I’m very quiet and introverted. And I’m not at all outgoing. But just I really enjoy playing very out there characters, because I get a chance to just kind of be a bit outrageous and do stuff I would normally do. So. That was part of the draw for me as well.
Karin
Yeah. Oh, lovely. Yeah, I it’s funny, because I have in fact, met, you now Maddy, we met at PodTales, which was lovely. But I’ve sort of interacted with you more as Claire. So in my head, you are so you’re so much shoutier and drunker than you are in real life.
Maddy
That’s amazing.
Karin
I think we can remedy that at Puch. uk. Yeah, my sort of mental image will be able to snap back into into form. But I mean, it is it is a funny thing, of course, where I get all your lovely recordings, and I so much time just listening to your voices and sort of, you know, getting to know your interpretation of the characters. And I mean, from from my point of view, because I when I cast you, I’d written about half of the story. And so the latter half of the scripts are definitely very much informed by you and by your characterizations of these characters and Yeah, and I think definitely for Claire, because, I mean, I’m a planner, when I write. So a lot of it was was all planned out. For Claire. And I didn’t really know what I was going to do with Claire. I knew exactly what kind of person she was, but I didn’t know how you know how her story would play out. And that sort of came along the way and I think partly because you were so, so good at being this. I’m not going to spoil anything. So good at being Claire. Yeah.
Maddy
Thank you.
Karin
So yeah, um, yeah, I’ve asked you to prepare some sort of question or point of discussion or something. We start with yours Anjali.
Anjali
Sure. Um, I would say that I am kind of the biggest newbie when it comes to podcasting in this group. And so really, my question was, all of you have been making podcasts or at least are starting now. What has been your experience? How, how have you like been able to gather the tools to really get started with that? What advice would you give someone like me who’s sort of just getting into it? doesn’t know anything. Really just curious how I could even get started?
Karin
As in as in starting to produce an audio drama. Yeah. Cuz you’re writing, right?
Anjali
Yeah, that’s right. Yeah, really sort of in the very early stages, though. And I would love to, you know, get make it into something probably by the end of next year, but we will see. But I’m just very curious what your process was early on. And in starting your first like, how did how did that go? And the nerves maybe how did you get over like a lot of like, the early concerns?
Karin
I’m sure there is lots to say, why don’t you start Maddy because you’ve had your audio drama the longest.
Maddy
I’m just trying to think so. Um, I was very lucky in that I got to do my MA. So I didn’t have to, like seek out a lot of stuff for myself. But one thing about writing that I found really helpful from that was, don’t edit yourself while you’re working, just let it flow out and just let it kind of splurge out and then go back and edit later. Because if you just keep going back on the previous sentence you’ve written and going, Oh, that’s not good enough, then you’re just going to be stuck forever. And also, you’re not going to be able to surprise yourself with what you write. And I think one of the nicest things about Prickwillow was that I didn’t really know where it was going. And in every other aspect of my life, I’m very much a planner. And in this, I was just like, I’m just gonna see how it goes. And I think for I think I’m going to be a bit more planned for the next season of whatever I write. But just for a first experience, it was really nice to just kind of see where it goes and not put too many restrictions on myself.
Karin
And Nerys is of course, you have you are creating all sorts of resources for others to use in your project, with Seren?
Nerys
Yeah, I’m trying I want to, because when people kind of asked me like, how have you done it? I mostly kind of say well, with a lot of help from people. So I want to kind of try and pay that back little bit. Even the little knowledge that I have trying to help people who started out from zero like I did, and try and pass on what I’ve learned, even if it’s kind of like little tips and tricks of things that I’ve picked up that I found useful.
Karin
Yeah. And I mean, because you have your sort of audio drama creation diary at the on the Audio Drama Hub podcast, which I love. And you’re also blogging, which is wonderful as well,
Unknown Speaker
Yes. When I when I do try and do get the time. Yeah. Because Yeah, like, I just want to try and help people see if I can create something useful, but to also share this process of how it’s going and share how like stressful it is, or how like good it feels when something particularly great happens. I just Yeah, I just want to kind of share one going and be open about it and see if that can help people in any way.
Karin
Yeah, I I find it wonderful and and very helpful. And I think one of the most amazing things that you’re doing there is that you’re, you’re sort of opening up about the the not so great stuff and the stresses and the anxieties and the that horrible disaster when you lost so much of your work, and it’s just Ah. But you know, the way that that you are talking about that makes it for me more sort of, I think it lowers the threshold for people that can think, okay, you know, they’re going to be setbacks, they’re going to be things that are not going to go my way, but I could do it anyway. And that’s the kind of probably the best piece of advice Anjali. And for anyone listening contemplating this lovely journey of starting an audio drama, to just sort of know that it’s probably not going to go exactly as you imagine or plan, but it can be really amazing, anyway. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. And if you don’t start, you know, you’re never gonna get there. So, yeah. And I think for me, writing, and I think I’ve probably said this in all the other cast interviews as well. I really tried very hard not to make it weekly for a whole year, because that is a little bit bananas, or a lot of bananas. But I just couldn’t make it make sense for the story. Because, you know, we have these really close friends and they’re really trying hard to keep in touch. And they’re moving very far away. Of course, they’re going to be in touch at least once a week. Of course they are. And Olivia if she finds this material, of course she’s going to podcast every week. There’s just no logic to doing it in a different way. For me to tell this story that I had embarked on. So but I think as I was writing and realizing that Oh, dear, this is very, very long and very, very big. It I sort of fell into that of just going okay, well, I’ve started it now. So I’m just gonna finish it. And somehow I did, you know. So sometimes starting can be a good way of actually ending up finishing something. Yeah, if that makes sense. Does that sort of answer your question? Anjali?
Anjali
Yeah, I think so. I think it’s also like a question that can never be answered. But also, thank you very much for everything that you’ve said. Because it’s been very helpful.
Karin
Okay, good. Well, I mean, I’m really looking forward to this whenever it shows. Yeah. Well, you know, no, pressure never drops. I’m going to be there. Listening. Yeah. accents, Maddy and Nerys, you use your own accents. But Anjali , you do not know. And you actually gave me three beautiful accents. In your audition. You gave me your own, which sounds American, he gave me a very, very beautiful, General British accent, I think, which there is no such thing, but you did it.
Anjali
for my American ear. The general British accent was definitely what it was going for.
Karin
Yeah. I liked it. But you know what do I know, you gave me this accent that you are using for Shirin. And I was wondering if you and I, I made you use that? Because I was like, yeah, there’s another accent in there. Even though your other two are really beautiful as well. So do you want to tell me a little bit about that accent? And where it comes from?
Anjali
Sure. I think it definitely comes from like home just because I tend to like cold switch a lot with like my family versus you know, being out in the world and talking to usually other Americans unless I’m studying abroad a year in London, in which case, I’m totally outside my comfort zone. But yeah, it definitely comes out a lot. And so I kind of just used a lot of that is like the base of it. Because you know, Shirin’s background is Indian, she is meant to sort of have an experience that I think is similar to mine, and, you know, being sort of a transplant and living somewhere that maybe her accent doesn’t match. But I think it’s interesting, because I haven’t really had the chance to use that anywhere else. And so it was this exciting. And I’m l glad that people will maybe hear it and enjoy it, hopefully.
Karin
Yeah, because I mean, that was one of the things when I was writing. I was like, in the UK. There are so many Indians and people from Pakistan. And I was like, but that makes a lot of sense that one of the roommates would be from because I didn’t specify it before I cast you. And of course, when I was living in London, it was very sort of present and I thought that was that’s important to show that. So yeah, I’m very I’m very happy that you took on took her on with that action, although you could have of course done your general British thing as well. And Nerys I make you speak Welsh.
Nerys
Yes, you do.
Karin
I asked you if you wanted to. I didn’tmake you.
Nerys
Yeah, no, it’s great. No, I’m always up for putting more Welsh in podcasts. Fun.
Karin
Yeah,
Nerys
No, it’s great. I do like Yeah, when you asked me to that’s like, Oh, that’s just so wonderful that, you know, there are so many other languages in the show for it to be included. was, was brilliant, it really did really mean a lot to me, that was kind of considered because, you know, such you know, it’s a language from small country, for it to be kind of considered with these other like, big huge languages that other people kind of know of, was, yeah, it was, it was just so nice to to kind of to be able to contribute, like some to the show.
Karin
Oh good. I mean, I I just think it’s so beautiful as well. And I love all these different languages. You know, if I had my way we would all we would have like 100 languages in this show, but I don’t think we I don’t think we could cover that somehow. But yeah, I’m and of course I put some Swedish in for Janis and I put some Danish in for Charlotte. And I think that’s it. So not that many languages. A few. A few. Anyway. Maddy, did you have your sort of question or discussion thing that you wanted to ask?
Maddy
Yes. I just wanted to ask what you all kind of learned about yourself and kind of voice acting away from performing the lines and, and recording them just kind of if you’re just kind of discovered something about your performance that you didn’t expect? Or if you I don’t know, my brain is going off track but.
Karin
Something that surprised us maybe
Maddy
Yeah, something. Yeah, if there was something that’s surprised you about recording the lines and something that you learned about yourself?
Karin
Yeah, Anjali, you want to start?
Anjali
Sure. So this was one of my first roles. And so that coupled with the fact that not much for performance background, it was all really a learning experience. And that was incredible that like I learned every single session that I did, I think also, especially because I was using an accent, it was really interesting for me to think about, you know, the layers of having to maintain that accent, and then also the performance underneath and being able to work that all together. So I felt like that especially was something that I had to work at, but was very rewarding when I was able to do it. And so, yeah, I felt like I gained a lot from it. Really enjoyed it.
Karin
Oh, good, I’m glad. Nerys?
Nerys
Um, yeah, I think kind of a lot the same for me as well. Cuz I’m still like very new to the whole voice acting thing. But Y2K kind of how that stands out. For me. It’s the only recurring role that I’ve had so far. So it was really interesting kind of every month to go back to the same character, because everything else I’ve done has been like, one off things that are like completely different. Yeah, it was nice to kind of come back every month be like, yeah, I can do Emma, again. It’s nice to come back to the character and see how that character then progresses through throughout the year and be able to follow a character’s see progresses as kind of things happen around her and yeah, so that was really, really interesting.
Karin
Yeah, great. I think, um, because I do come from a theatre background. I’m a drama teacher and I’ve done loads of improv and stuff like that. And I’ve also studied theatre directing, but voice acting I’m quite new at still, though, I’ve done a few things. So I think playing Jess, one thing I do with Jess is I put I pitch her voice a little higher. Because I mean, I’m not 25 I pitch her voice a little higher. And just to maintain that tiny bit of like a pitch raise was consistently was very hard. And I think I flubbed that like a gazillion times. And they’re going to be flubs in the show. But I’m trying that and sustaining that as as you were saying, Nerys, just a sort of coming back to that and every recording session, okay, where where’s she at? was really interesting to me. Also, I can’t say the word little as Jess. I cannot say it, I, I write it, and I can’t say it. And I sort of stopped writing it. And so yeah, that’s a discovery I guess. Maddy, did you discover anything?
Maddy
I think, well, I’m very, very lame. And I’ve only been properly drunk about twice. So I was surprised that I managed to be like, reasonably consistently drunk. Basically, that was exciting for me. I think that was just the main thing.
Karin
I love that. Yeah, okay. Nerys you have a question? I think, I hope.
Nerys
I had. I do. Um, well, one. Yeah. The one I came up with is for, for you, Karen. Yeah. Um, with well came up with this, because it’s kind of relevant to what I’m doing, but kind of how have you found like, the whole experience of being a solo creator kind of like writing, you know, your voice acting as well, your editing, because, like, to me, the impression that I get kind of from social media is that you are incredibly organized with it all, like, much more organized than I am. There’s be like, so much promotion for this show for months? And that’s incredible. Yeah, it’s, it’s kind of interesting, interested in kind of how the whole process has been from where you came from, to where we are now.
Karin
Yeah. A lot. I think is the answer to that. It’s been a lot, but also, um, I love it so much. And I am in I think I got into theater, an amateur theater at the start, because, I mean, I do love acting, and I do love performances. But what I really what I really enjoy are two things. I love having this sort of having a whole project in my hands, and sort of overseeing that both creatively and administratively, I guess. So, theater for me is always a lot about my love for projects. And that was very easily translatable to managing an audio drama as a solo creator. And I think, I mean writing I’d written plays before I never written anything of this size or length. or whatever. I mean, the full script is the size. It’s, it’s more words than, you know, the average novel, which is a little weird thinking about it. But I didn’t know that when I started writing. So that was good, I think. But I also, I mean, I think I have that, I love balancing the create the creative bits with the admin bits, and I don’t mind the admin bits too much. And I’m very sort of satisfied when I’ve uploaded, you know, like, 10 episodes in a row, and they’re all, they’re all there, and I’m all done, and I can go Yay. So, um, and promotion wise, you haven’t seen anything yet. I have so much front loaded. Um, but I’m glad that you’re, that you’ve noticed that things have been happening, of course. I mean, being solo, I sort of feel like I should bring people in more. And of course, when I started, I was very confident that I knew how to find actors. And I felt very confident from my directing background, that I wouldn’t be able to pick the good ones like you guys, you know, because I felt like I knew that I know, acting I know, I know, when someone is able to perform. And I understand that. However, the audio medium and writing for audio, I mean, of course, I’ve learned so much that I’m going to do different next time. And also I think, editing, I, I have a nonfiction podcast as well, that I sort of cut my editing teeth on, which was lucky. So that’s been going on for a year and a half. And I produce that. So I took that those editing skills, which are of course, very, very sort of basic. And I read up on everything I could about sound design, and I just sort of started I guess, and what else what else was part of the question? Let’s see. But I’m a control freak, too, you know? Yeah. I’m old enough now to sort of understand that and try to work with it rather than against it. You know, sometimes it can be a good thing too. Does that sort of answer your question Nerys?
Nerys
Yeah. Just like yes. is interested in Yeah. And in your process, basically. But yeah,
Karin
I’m just because I think and, you know, in regards to you guys, the communication in regards to you and the cast zone, and all of that I did that out of my own frustration as a voice actor and not not getting the information I want. I guess. I wanted you guys-
Anjali
It has been lovely. Wonderful. Glad.
Nerys
Yeah. No, it’s, it’s great. It’s so brilliant. I’ve got like everything. It’s just yeah, so moving. everything in one place is so yeah, it’s brilliant.
Karin
Oh good-Well, I’m glad you’ve enjoyed it. OK, well I’m gonna give you the opportunity to tell people where they can find you. On social media, of course, and about your lovely shows, those of you that havet hem, and maybe a little bit about upcoming something, so, you want to start Maddy?
Maddy
Yes, so you can find all my podcasty-type stuff at snazzytapir.wordpress.com cause that’s my silly production company name, and I am at maddy_abstract on Twitter, and you can also find Prickwillow Papers, my podcast, @prickwillowpod on Twitter as well.
Karin
Perfect! Anjali.
Anjali
I am podcastless, so just find me on Twitter at @hereliesAnjali.
Karin
Perfect. And look out for an upcoming podcast, in, whenever.
Anjali
Yeah. We’ll see.
Karin
Nerys.
Nerys
On Twitter I am @podnen, my podcast which is launching next month, it’s Seren, it’s S-E-R-E-N, on Twitter it’s @serenpod, and I do have a blog that I’ve been using to kind of write about my progress in putting Seren together which is nerysdiary.wordpress.com and as Karin mentioned I have been doing a diary for the Audio Drama Hub podcast as well, and I pop up in a few voice acting things here and there.
Karin
And you can find me @karinheim on Twitter, that’s k-a-r-i-n-h-e-i-m and of course you can find all of us at y2kpod.com So there we go. OK. Want to say oceans of hugs to everyone?
Everyone
Oceans of hugs!
(OUTRO MUSIC)
BEHIND THE SCENES 4
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BEHIND THE SCENES 5
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BEHIND THE SCENES 6
Transcript not yet available.
Halloween Special 2020: 2K20 – A Y2K Horror Parody
NARRATOR: The following is a parody using characters and situations from Y2K. It does not in any way take place within the normal continuity and is purely for fun on Halloween. Content warnings include screams, references to blood, and possibly intense situations.
OLIVIA: (nervously) Hi! I’m Olivia…one thing I’ve learned from geology is about the progression of time, one layer to another. Mostly gradual, sometimes violent, the changes of the world compressed into neat geologic strata. Um…I may have led to a…big change in the world. I didn’t realize opening the laptop with my mum’s voicemails would cause the apocalypse. I mean, I’m not Bruce Campbell and it’s just an old laptop…well, Windows ME was evil, but it’s no Necronomicon. But…here we are. Everything’s changed. Kat and Jess are now demon hunters. I think…I have to bring them all together to undo this evil curse 2020 has fallen under.
NARRATOR: Welcome to 2K20…and may god mercy on our souls.
{2K20 INTRO Music – Start of normal Y2K theme, cut short by explosions and screams} [Beep of voicemail]
KAT: Hi Jess, hope this message finds you still alive and not devoured by zombies, disemboweled by werewolves, bitten by vampires, or possessed by demonic forces. Yeah…just remember to wash your hands for at least twenty seconds, okay? Helps with all the blood and you know, that virus thing that’s going around. Funny how things change…One moment I’m prepping for a scene, the next I’m fighting a possessed production assistant trying to bite my face off! But I think change is good, you know? We get too set in our ways. I was doing too many roles as a damsel in distress anyway, so I wanted more action. Something with a bit more meat, y’know? Something I could really sink my teeth into? Yeah, bad choice of words…Good thing I watched Buffy all those years ago! Oh for fuck’s sake, I’m trying to-…Jess, excuse me one moment…
[Automatic weapons fire, zombie body hitting the ground]
KAT: Take that, brain muncher! Sorry about that. I heard from Olivia. She wants you, me, Johnno, Emma, Rachel…really whoever is still alive from the voicemails to get together to figure out how to stop 1 all this from happening. Oh, on another note, cute podcast she’s doing, right? Big fan! So um, see you soon, Jess. Oceans of sociallydistanced hugs. [Machine gun fire. Beeps of voicemail]
RACHEL: Hi Jess! Guess the laptop held an ancient evil. Funny…I seem to recall telling somebody not to summon nameless gods of unbelievable terror in the name of “writing research,” but nooooo…why listen to the librarian who knows things? I’m on my way to meet Olivia. I always thought she’d change the world…didn’t figure her for ending it, though. That son of a bitch Johnno, sure! Or Shirin. Maybe Emma…it’s always the quiet, unassuming ones. See you soon! Remember to wear a mask, love…blood gets everywhere. Oceans of hugs…but only between members of the same household. Damn restrictions. Bye! [Beeps of voicemail, sounds of driving in the background]
JESS: For your information, I wrote a great story from that research and YOU helped me find the book that summoned the evil. So this is on you, too. I’m almost at the rendezvous. See you soon. Remember to use sanitizer. It’s great for keeping hands clean and setting the undead on fire in a pinch. Oceans of…you know, this phrase really doesn’t land well in 2020…I’ll work on it…
***** FARMHOUSE, ENGLISH COUNTRYSIDE
[Crickets chirping, breeze blowing]
OLIVIA: Soooo…I suppose you’re wondering why I called you to this remote farmhouse in the English countryside! Perfect for twenty-year reunions…and last stands against the undead! (Chuckles weakly)
JOHNNO: Oh thank god you’re not my kid.
KAT: Shut up, Johnno. Okay, let’s turn the laptop on… [Keyboard typing, followed by unearthly scream]
JESS: Wow, this thing is taking ‘blue screen of death’ pretty literally.
OLIVIA: Can we restart it? 2 [Pounding on the door, door breaking down, Zombie sounds in the background]
EMMA: (demonic voice) Don’t you dare touch that computer!
JESS: Emma??? You’re…a zombie!
EMMA: Yeah! I admit it’s a bit of a lifestyle change, but I’m getting out and eating- uh, I mean meeting new people!
KIRSTEN: (demonic voice) Emma serves the queen very well.
KAT: Mor??? You’re queen of the undead?! How did that happen?
KIRSTEN: I needed something to do in retirement. I mean, playing with grandchildren was out since somebody had to be a movie star. Then Olivia opened up the voicemails and this opportunity came along. I can take over the world, make unholy alliances…you know, be a politician, but also transparent about being a total monster.
KAT: I’m sorry, Mor. I have to stop you and save the world. But if it’s any consolation, driving a stake through your heart is going to be a-mazing.
KIRSTEN: I’m not a vampire, I’m a demon. Let’s get our evil species straight.
KAT: Well, whatever I need to do to stop you…still gonna be amazing. [Punches thrown, glass breaking, gunfire]
JOHNNO: Hey, why are these demons ignoring me? KIRSTEN: They think you’re one of them. You know, a total parasite. C’mon, we all thought it, no need to act surprised.
KAT, JESS, OLIVIA, RACHEL: “Yeah,” “Totally,” “I agree,” “Bastard”
JOHNNO: There’s no reason to be rude. You have to be more considerate. Fine, zombies, just pretend I’m not here. [Zombie snarl] OH GOD ZOMBIES PRETEND I’M NOT HERE-AHHHHH!!
[Johnno screams, is eaten. One zombie belches]
KAT: Oh, he is soooo dead. Oh well.
OLIVIA: How do we stop this?
RACHEL: Maybe if we reverse the polarity of the neutron flow- I’m just kidding. I watched Doctor Who last night.
JESS: Reverse the polarity of the neutron flow!
OLIVIA: Not helping!
JESS: Try Control Alt Delete! EMMA: I will eat your heart!
JESS: Just remember when you’re in hell and we’re separated by distance…[Emma is stabbed]…Oceans of blood. [Gunshot]
OLIVIA: Oooh, I like that!
RACHEL: Let’s see…I like Macs better…where is Ctrl…? [Button press]
KAT: HURRY UP!
RACHEL: Alt [button press]…Do I press them all at the same time, or just in sequence? [Zombie snarl]
KIRSTEN: (Evil laughter)
JESS: Any time now!
OLIVIA: Delete! [Button press] Here goes nothing!
[Magical Explosion]
***** RECORDING BOOTH
KARIN: Okay, cut. Karin here, creator of Y2K. You know, I really appreciate input from the incredibly creative people I work with, but I don’t think it’s a good idea to set Y2K Season 2 as a monsterhunting show. Much as I love ‘Buffy the Vampire Slayer.’ And ‘Oceans of Blood’…how do I put this..wouldn’t look great on a t-shirt or sticker.
NERYS: I’m not too keen on ‘Zombie Emma.’
JANIS: I like this premise!
CHARLOTTE: Me too. I really think we could delve deep into Kirsten’s character this season…
ADAM: What are you talking about? Kat’s got Shakespearean drama with her mama, there are pop culture references galore and a lot of monster-killing. It’s gold!
FELICITY: I think it needs more of a sci-fi element…maybe they’re lost in space or bounty hunters, even better!
KARIN: No. Y2K’s a story about love and friendship across distance, not death and monsters. And definitely not fighting Wookiees and Klingons.
KIRSTY: I’m gonna pretend you didn’t mix franchises like that.
KARIN: And I’m gonna write a real Season 2. Just…stay here and don’t touch anything.
[Door closes]
ADAM: Well, now what? Any ideas?
*****
NARRATOR: Thank you for listening to “2K20: A Y2K Parody”. This story written, directed, and based on a half-baked idea proposed on Discord by Adam Blanford, using characters originally created by Karin Heimdahl. Olivia was played by Kirsty Woolven; The Narrator was played but sorely underutilized by Emma Laslett; Kat was played by Janis Westin; Jess was played by Karin Heimdahl; Rachel was played by Felicity Boyd; While Johnno was played by Adam Blanford, to whom we owe a special thanks for doing what we’ve all been hoping to do in the normal continuity. No rest for the wicked. Emma was played by Nerys Howell, Kirsten was played by Charlotte Norup. Y2K intro music was created by Jake Haws. Screams provided by Charlotte Norup, Nerys Howell, and Tal Minear, who may or may not have already had nearly two solid minutes of prerecorded screaming. Go ahead, ask them about it. Sound effects were provided by Freesound.org. All of us here wish you a happy, safe Halloween. Remember to wash your hands, wear a mask, and maintain a proper social distance from zombies. Thanks for listening.
Y2K Productions 